Wenn es im Winter stürmt und schneit, haben wir eine Flasche Glühwein allzeit bereit - life in Germany and Austria

[LinzerTorte]

As I couldn't find a suitable poem mentioning Glühwein, I composed my own. Please don't laugh.

All welcome - anyone living in Germany, Austria or anywhere else who would like to chat.

I think my 2 have a building society account in UK that my mum opened when they were born. It's a small town though and when you know the bank manager you can get away with all sorts! They're siting on hundreds of bank notes though as they have a tendancy to not spend their money when they're given it for birthdays and Christmas. Ds has got far too much to be gathering dust - he's been saving for years! I wonder if that's the Swabian influence as he was born in Schwabenland and they say they save alot and don't spend!

I still have an account in UK but I think when my debit card runs out of date they won't send me a new one abroad. I told them my new address here because my post was going to my parents' house and my dad was opening it (probably thinking it would be helpful to tell me on the phone what was in all my letters!).

I've still got a current account in the UK with my german address on it and they seem happy with it. (not that its got any money in it!). The account for ds2 was a child trust fund as when he was born they gave all babies £500! no wonder the country is in a mess.

Yes, I think it's often left to the bank's discretion. I still use my parents' address for my UK bank account (luckily they don't open my post) and haven't told them I'm living abroad as I'm a bit worried that I wouldn't be able to keep my account otherwise, although I know someone who had an account with the same bank and changed his address to one in Germany without any problems.

No one seems to have told DS that Nikolo doesn't bring presents. I'm currently writing a list on his behalf, in German because Nikolo doesn't understand English, asking for a real computer, a desert mouse, a toy dog, a new TV (he doesn't have an old one, I hasten to add) and "alle Süßigkeiten, die es gibt". DD1's Nikolo list is a bit more modest (1 chocolate Nikolo, 13 sweets and a packet of Überraschungseier) but she has also written a proper wish list, addressed to the Christmas tree.

Canella how incredibly annoying about the passports! I have always collected them for my kids, and never had a problem, dd was the only one born in the UK and they all only have German ones now, as it is cheaper and easier to get them - they just look us up on the computer. Maybe because we live in a very small place ... Hope the procedure hasn't changed! We did both have to be present to register births due to my foreignness...

My kids get one present and some choc in their boot on 6th - this year they have a DVD each (DS1 has been waiting and waiting and waiting for Cars 2 to be released, and DD has been asking for Alice in Wonderland). Choc is always one of those little Milka bundles of hollow Father Christmases and similar.

I tidied and cleaned my living room this morning - took 3 hours! Partly due to pulling furniture out and sorting book shelves and games, and baby-proofing as I go along, more due to DS2 wanting me to kneel next to him all morning so he can pull up - he can pull to standing but only using me, not furniture.

DS1 is over tired and howling every 2 seconds when he manages to bump himself slightly, he is still not over this blimin virus or whatever it has been, though dd is fine but for the cough and at a friends'.

5more, I remember going to register the birth of dd, had to take a Vollmacht, signed by dh who was in the middle of his Großpraktikum at university so couldn't get leave. I'd just given birth and had 16 month old ds and the registry office for births was hidden away up stairs, down a few more stairs in a back room. I was exhausted.

Linzer, love your dc's lists! My 2 have very short lists this year but I think that's good. Had a talk a while back that just because they got a laptop each last year doesn't mean they have to think of equivelant value/greatness for this year. The laptops were needed for school (on top of the almost 100? taschenrechner). They seem to have got it though and dd looks forward to the sweets and goodies more than anything.

I've had 'the email' from home, Are you coming over at Christmas we'd love to see you have the dc got long holidays etc from my mum. How can I put it to them, I know we'd rather stay here and relax as we're all exhausted as the last school holiday was just hard work and exhausting due to travel to Dhaka. Anyway, we honestly can't afford it but if I say that there's the risk that they'll offer to pay which I don't want.

All my kids are in bed asleep - it won't last

I forgot to say before I have a Nat West account, which I have had since university, and they have been fine with me changing my address to Japan when I lived there, and now here. I even applied for my first credit car from them while living in Japan and they had no problem with it. I hate things going to my parents address as it makes me feel about 17 (not in a good way)!

admylin that sounds a nightmare, back when you registered dd's birth - I hadn't realised your DC were only 16 months apart! The office to register births here is pram accessible :)

The Christmas demands from your mum sound headache inducing - my mum also does the offering to pay if I say I can't afford something. My parents have a much bigger disposable income than us as they are retired doctors with professional pensions, which my dad is still allowed to claim even though he (by choice) still works 4 days a week in private practice! So they are actually better off now than they have ever been! So they can afford to pay for things but - again - it makes me feel like a dependant teen, and I don't like that feeling! I told my mother in a recent emotional blackmail based phone call that schools here break up on 24th Dec (true) so we will never be able to go to thiers for Christmas - that was harsh of me wasn't it? But it was true! (Why does she need me to say I wish I could spend Christmas with them - also why can't I just lie and say it even though it isn't remotely true? ) She then suggested New Year - who celebrates New Year when they have 3 small children, and for those who do - who would chose to do so with their parents?
Ah well...

Hope you find a suitable way to answer the email and don't get emotionally blackmailed into doing anything you don't want to!

5more I always feel like I'm 16 or 17 again when I'm back at my parents'. I also hate having everything I do/say discussed and analysed (usually behind closed doors).

I don't have any problem with post being sent there, though; in fact, I'm not sure I'd be able to cope without being able to use my parents' address as I order quite a lot of stuff from UK sites that either don't ship to Austria or charge a ridiculous amount to do so. It's always nice to get back and have lots of post waiting for me; my mum told me that the parcels are piling up! Can't remember what I've ordered, although I know there are at least two books waiting for me from MN giveaways. One is the Guinness Book of Records, which is very handy as it's one of the things on DD1's Christmas list.

admylin That's a difficult situation wrt your parents. Mine are OK about us never being able to go back for Christmas as the school holidays don't start until the 24th (although we're taking the girls out of school a day early so that we can go back this year - which reminds me, must check with their teachers today), although I think they'd be quite upset if we didn't go back at all. Mind you, I do like going back at Christmas and am already looking forward to the food and not having to do any cooking! Hope you manage to get it sorted out without your parents being too upset, anyway.

I left all the bureaucratic stuff up to DH when the DC were born; he went and registered the birth, got the Staatsbürgerschaftsnachweis and I think there was something else he had to do. I don't think I even had to sign anything; it took him the best part of a morning, so I'm glad I didn't have to be present.

I'm taking DD1 to an open day at the neue Mittelschule tomorrow; she said all but three of her class are going. DD2 is quite upset that she can't have the day off too! Unfortunately DH can't come as he's applied for a new job at work and has got the assessment centre part of the interview tomorrow morning. Rather him than me - I'm so glad that when I apply to agencies, it doesn't usually entail anything more than sending an e-mail and my CV, and possibly a couple of test translations. But then I have the kind of job where I don't have to interact with anyone other than by e-mail and the occasional phone call.

That's nice that the Mittelschule has an open day like that Linzer. When we were looking at schools it was always an open afternoon and very busy. The school they are at now only opened some of the classrooms and it was difficult to get a real idea about the place.

Anyway, dd got another 2 in her latest Deutscharbeit yesterday which she wasn't expecting! It certainly boosts her confidence when she sees positive results to her hard work.

At dd's Hockey training they asked who wanted to play in the first match of the season so dd said yes. Now it turns out it's in Braunschweig (an hour drive from here) and she needs a team outfit before Saturday. She's now not sure if she wants to go as it'll basically take up most of her Saturday. After school today she has to decide and then we'll have to dash into town to the one hockey shop that is really expensive to get her a kit (a skort and a top) that will cost atleast 50?.

How seriously do you take a hobby like sport? I'm not sure if dd just enjoys playing at training or wants to go into the team. They (at the club) take it quite seriously and go to loads of matches with all ages and when I see the A team (girls over 14) they train very intensly and all look like sport professionals, very fit and have training 3 times a week.

5more - and, did they sleep through after your early night?
I'm going to compose my email about Christmas now. Think I'm just going to say we're all looking forward to relaxing at home and having a quiet few days then we'll be having guests...sound OK?

Sounds good, admylin - they can't really take offence at that or try to persuade you to change your mind.

Well done to your DD on her 2. Good marks can be so motivating, can't they? The NMS has both an open morning and an open afternoon for parents who can't make it in the morning, but we're busy in the afternoon so morning is better from us. I think DH wants to go and have a look round in the afternoon, though. The Gymnasium just had an open morning, but as we knew that DD1 wouldn't be going there she didn't go. We'll probably go to the other Gymnasium's open day in January just to compare the two schools.

I think the DC take after me sports-wise - DS tried out football but wasn't all that keen so I'm not sure if we'll be going back and DD2 does ballet, but I don't think that really counts as sport. We've got the ice skating course this afternoon, which DD2 loves; she always wants to go ice skating at the weekend too, but that's fine by me as I quite enjoy it as well. One of my friend's daughters is really into ice skating - she used to go training three times a week, would go away to summer ice skating camps etc - but I can't imagine any of my three getting that enthusiastic about any kind of sport.

Similar here, I think dd just wants to play for fun but I'll see what she says when she gets home today.

So, I took my head out of the sand for a moment and decided I must start on Christmas - starting with Nikolaus so I got oranges, nuts, selection of dried fruit and banana chips and a chocolate Santa. That's enough for a Stiefel isn't it? I am not doing a present as they have so little on their list that I need it all for Christmas!! Then I saw one of those make-your-own Hexenhaus kits so I got that too and we'll make it on the 6th and they can invite a friend round to eat it sometime before school breaks up.

Linzer the Mittleschule sounds really good, at least in comparison to the Gymnasiaum in your area! Good luck to your DH on his assessment for the promotion (is it a promotion or a whole new job?)

Admylin (Admysteltoe) well done on the diplomatic response to your parents. We are going back to the UK in May as it happens (first visit in 2 years, but pregnancy and small baby something of an excuse), just not for Christmas.

Thanks for asking about the sleep, but sleeping through ... what's that again? A legendary event when all the children in a house stay asleep for 11 or 12 hours? Erm... No . Henry has only slept through once in his 7 months so far, and the next day I thought I had mastitus . It will happen one day... Actually last night was spectacularly bad... I am not sure what happened as he was a comparitively good sleeper until about 5.5 months old, as in he went down to just one or two night wakings quite quickly, which is good for a breast fed baby (or anyway for one of mine) and I thought he was like DS1, who was a pretty good sleeper, but then at 5.5 months he turned into baby dd - who thought sleep was for the weak, could barely be put down til she waqs 3 months and needed to check milk was still available at least every 2 hours til she was 9 months old... He is happy enough in the day (except when he is tired) and is very active and mobile and communicative, waving and clapping and babbling and raising arms (and trying to, and if I am slightly co-operative succeeding, climbing into my lap) to be lifted) so I assume he just has a busy brain atm ...

All the kids are in bed asleep again atm, but due to an odd combination of post bath events DS1 is in bed under his duvet only wearing a dressing gown (he fell asleep having a strop about me not dressing him, not only has he been able to do it himself since he was 2.5, but I had a dripping wet baby in my hands at the time he decided he couldn't) - should I disturb him to get him into his PJs I wonder...?

Brr, freezing here this morning. I haven't checked the temperature but it's definitely below freezing.

admylin Well done on starting to get organised for Christmas; I keep meaning to, but... I should really start thinking about Nikolosackerl, although I'm sure my ILs will send some to the DC and one each is definitely enough.

5more Sympathies on the broken nights - none of mine slept through properly until they were over 12 months. It's particularly frustrating when they manage to sleep through for a while, even if it's just once or twice (to show you they could do it if they really wanted to), and then go back to waking again.

DH went off to work even earlier than usual feeling fairly nervous - it's more of a promotion than a new job, as it's for head of his department, although it's a new position that has just been created. He stayed up quite late working on his presentation but he's not overly nervous about that or the interview, it's more the role plays etc. Like I said, rather him than me!

Actually, I was asked yesterday if I'd be interested in a job - 10 hours a week in a Neue Mittelschule about 30-40 minutes away. They're looking for a native speaker for maths and physics lessons, which are taught in both English and German - but there's no way my maths or physics vocab is up to teaching at secondary level, even if it was just interpreting what the teacher said in German. I'm not really interested anyway as it would virtually mean having to give up translating - even if it's only two hours a day, it would really take up the whole morning with travelling etc. I don't want to give up the flexibility of working from home either. I can't imagine it's brilliantly paid, but I'll check before I turn it down completely!

Ooh the Christmas names are out! I shall try (and fail!) to think of something suitably festive...

Well done on sending the email, admylin. I hope it works out ok - I can't see that you have written anything to be offended by. I'm also impressed by your Christmas organisation! I'm desperate to start baking & decorating & writing cards but am, as always, pinned to the sofa by the ever-hungry baby! I have a jar of mincemeat & some ready-to-roll pastry so I might manage a few mince pies at the weekend.

LinzerGood luck to your DH! Also very impressed you were offered a job without even applying! It's such a shame you would have to give up translating if you took it though - it always sounds like you really enjoy your work.
On a work note - I was wondering if you would mind helping me with something. I'll PM you but please feel free to tell me to bugger off if you don't have time/think it's a cheeky request.

5more Seding oodles of sympathy your way! It really puts my moaning about the lack of sleep into perspectve when I think of how you have three to deal with! Did you get DS1 in his pjs in the end?

Well the thrush has flared up again, making bf a bit of a nightmare yet again. I spoke to my midwife as it has been going on for a good month now & I'm sick of the pain & the gel I have to keep slathering myself with (as DS inevitably ends up with his hands & face covered too). The mw said the next step would be medication prescribed by the Dr, which would mean expressing & throwing away the milk and bottle-feeding DS in the meantime. Tbh that would have meant the end of bf for me as there's no way I could express enough to keep my supply up, plus make up bottles to keep up with DS' voracious appetite, with a baby who screams as soon as he isn't in my arms during the day. However, she referred me to a Stillberaterin for a second opinion, who says I can carry on bf whlst taking medication (if it gets that far, I have to wait a few days to see if it starts to get better before I go to the Dr) - so that's a positive!

Cold and wet here Linzer but thank godness it's not freezing as we need to dig a hole in dd's friend's garden this afternoon. It's gerbil funeral day. I've said that even if it's raining we'll do it but I hope it stops later.

Good luck on the promotion for dh although you might never see him as he's away quite often as it is! Or would he be more in charge of sending other people on trips if he gets it?

Same here, there's no way I would do anything involving physics or maths! Maybe you could ask if they want someone for history or politics?

5more, what did you do with ds? Dress him or leave him in dressing gown? I'd have left him! Mine have gone to sleep in all sorts of things, often in new shoes like wellies, winter boots, new slippers etc! Funny but when they were small toddlers if they got new footwear they kept it on even in bed! I usually took them off when I was going to bed but my 2 were good sleepers.

Later, that's good that you can get a second opinion. I had a great book when I had dd in German but it was like my second opinion when I wasn't sure what to do and all natural stuff. I used the tea recipes, had to go in the pharmacy for them to be mixed!!

I remember being given some gel too and dd had thrush on her tongue. Have you checked baby's tongue?

The Dr & the midwife both had a look & couldn't see anything in his mouth, but apparently that doesn't really mean anything. The Stillberaterin said if I've had it for so long then he must have it too. It's a bit of a nightmare trying to treat it as 'after each feed' doesn't really exist! As soon as I think he has finally finished, fallen asleep, I wait 15 mins or so to be sure before I apply the gel & put some in his mouth and, ping, the eyes are open, the fist is in the mouth and he starts crying & wriggling towards the breast for another feed!
I like to think it's because I'm producing high quality champagne instead of milk

Linzer Good luck to your dh. I don´t envy him having to do the role plays. Will he hear today?

Later I really hope you can get the bf sorted. It must be so frustrating.

Well I´m not buying any chocolate for Nikolaus before Monday. I made the mistake of buying too early last year and ended up eating it all and having to go and buy more. I´ve absolutely no willpower when it comes to chocolate.

Later you must have amazing persistence and willpower to keep going with bf through all these problems. I really hope it all gets sorted for you soon.

Linzer it always feels wrong to turn down work, doesn't it, even if you feel it would be more hassle and take up more time than it would be worth. When I was at Berlitz I agreed, against my better judgement, to teach technical English to several groups at a large company. It was a huge mistake: I was on the back foot from the start, didn't have the right materials to try to start planning lessons (which in any case isn't normally required at Berlitz) and the company ended up complaining. My boss said she was very surprised to receive a complaint about me (it was the only one in the 7 years I worked there), but tbh I wasn't remotely surprised and so relieved not to have to go back.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, it's best to trust your instincts. You certainly have a better grasp of maths and physics than I do of car parts and manufacturing, but if you feel it's not right and you wouldn't be able to do it as well as you feel it should be done, then you shouldn't feel bad about turning it down.

admysteltoe hope it is dry for the funeral and that your dd isn't too upset by it.

Finally have a bit of time to catch up with the thread - it's been all go here today. The open day at the NMS was good; all the teachers I've seen so far seem very motivated and friendly and I think it's just the kind of environment that DD1 needs. DD1 and I sat in on an art and a chemistry lesson (they were making chocolate, which we got to sample - it was surprisingly good!), and DH - who went this afternoon - went to watch a geography and a French lesson (he had to take part!). DD1 hasn't said any more than it was "good" and that she liked it, but she hasn't seen the Gymnasium yet. It will be interesting to compare the two, anyway.

The good news is that DH got the job. As he was the last applicant (I think there were only two or three), they were able to tell him more or less straight away. He assured me before he applied that it wouldn't mean longer working hours or much more travel - tbh though, I've got used to the travel and as long as he's not away at the weekend, I'm quite happy to have the odd evening to myself.

ladder It took me a few minutes to work out who you were, as I always think of you as just silken!
Yes, it's always hard to turn down work but I feel that if I took this job on, I would have to turn down almost every translation I was offered - and I really feel that translating is my vocation rather than teaching. I just don't think that there's any way I could teach maths or physics either, even if it's just as an English language assistant - maths for the first few years of primary possibly, but no further. I might have been tempted if it was at the NMS here and was in subjects I was more comfortable with, but the only advantage that I can see is that it would be a guaranteed income. Basically though, I enjoy translating more than teaching and (provided I get sent the work) it's generally more money for fewer hours.

hupa I'm rarely tempted by Austrian chocolate (Cadbury's is another matter), although the chocolate that the Nikolos are made from can be rather moreish. I'm very good until it's actually opened, but have frequently found myself eating most of the DC's chocolate Nikolos.

Later Sorry to hear you're having problems with thrush again; I hope it can get sorted out quickly. Good news re the lactation consultation anyway; the one I saw when DD1 was born was a godsend. I found expressing quite a hassle and although I did do it occasionally, I can't imagine having been able to express enough to keep up my supply.
Have just PMed you.

admylin Hope the funeral went OK and it stopped raining. How's the other gerbil now?

Congratulations to your dh linzer and hope he doesn't have to go away more often.

I was talking to dd's friend's mum yesterday at the gerbil funeral and she said some of her dh's colleagues used to have to wait 3 months for their pay and that what they've done to my dh with pay is common and if you don't chase after it they won't change. Dd's other friend's dad is a doctor working in the hospital helicopter for emergency calls and he said they often forget to pay his over time for nights and weekends. Imagine if you suddenly had to live and pay your usual bills and no money came in for 3 months. I can't believe that still happens here.

We're not going to the hockey game today so dd is enjoying her relaxing morning curled up with a book then we have to go and buy a Wichtelgeschenk. Do you do that at school or work everyone? Dd is lucky as she pulled one of her friend's name so it shouldn't be too difficult although it'll be harder to get something between 3 and 5?.

That's awful about pay being forgotten/paid so late. I used to work for an agency who would take 90 days or more to pay (it was in their T&C) and it really summed up their attitude to their translators - contantly trying to get me to drop my price, sending me e-mails along the lines of "if you won't do it, another of our highly qualified translators will", etc. The agency I mainly work for now treats its translators with much more respect (and pays within 30 days).

Is a Wichtelgeschenk like Secret Santa? I'm sure DH has it at work, but I think it's called something different here. I'll have to ask him when he gets back - I've sent him out to do the weekly food shop while I get on with some proofreading (DC permitting, although they seem to be playing together quite nicely - or at least quietly - atm).

Now that he's got the job, DH has admitted to me that he may have to travel to Romania more often. Why does he have to go to places where I never need anything from?! London would be ideal - or anywhere in the UK, really - but he's only been there once or twice.

Yes, it's secret Santa and the dc asked to do it in dd's class otherwise the teacher wouldn't have even considered it. He does the minimum. Ds's class asked their class teacher to go on a trip so they're going ice skating. Looks like in Gymnasium if you don't ask you don't get!

It's pouring so we're still at home, have to get ready and get the shopping over with though as all the local shops for the secret Santa present close at 2pm and we don't want to go into the city.

Well, DH says it's called wichteln here as well. I've just looked it up on Wikipedia and apparently it's called Engerl-Bengerl in Austria! Have definitely never heard that, as I know I'd remember it.

I've just looked out of the window and have noticed it's pouring here too. And I was going to go out for a run this afternoon. Oh well, it gives me an excuse to put it off until tomorrow (if I don't go first thing, I never get out).

Just a quick one to say congratulations to Linzer's dh on the promotion. I hope he doesn't have to go to Romania much, but very well done. Hope the rain stops and you all have a lovely Sunday. We went to watch the Christmas Parade today and after an hour and a half it was distinctly chilly. Very small town America though, in a good way. Good luck finding the Secret Santa presents too. Will catch up properly soon.