Fiancee has brain tumour- surgery tomorrow

[Love0910]

I always read Mumsnet because I think it is really great this connection and support you all give each other.
A while ago I posted about how to deal with not having kids, and said my fiancee has Multiple Sclerosis.
It turns out that she was wrongly diagnosed. And a new doctor found out a Brain Tumor. It has been a lot to deal with.
Tomorrow (06/07) she will have a surgery to remove the tumor. Which was already told that can't be totally removed. And even after surgery she has a life expectancy of maybe 5 years.
I am really going crazy now. They put her to sleep already so the brain can rest.
It is all so uncertain. She can be in coma. Be in a vegetative state. Speechless. Lose movements. Lose memories.
My anxiety is over the top. I can't stop crying. I am so afraid. Have been praying for days. She prayed all day.
I think I am just seeking for some support and prayers for her.

((Hugs)) for tomorrow, it will be a long long day.

You are both in my prayers x

Sending my best wishes to you and your fiancee. It is going to be hard for you as well so make sure (I know it will be difficult) that you
also get a rest tonight, so that when she comes around you will be there.
She is in safe hands the doctors and nurses will give her the best care.

Thinking of you x

I am very sorry for you both. I can’t imagine what you are showing through.

I lost my baby son in February and the days that followed I could not function. Things like leaving the bed to go to the toilet and even making a sandwich which I rarely did, was confusing. Like I’d forgotten how to carry out basic life functions my body was shutting down and the grief, stress, pain emotional torture, lack of sleep all started catching up.

No doubt that Tomorrow will be a very tough day for you. It will be difficult to think about anything else but her but please try to drink and eat a little. You need to be strong for her and your physical state is one that is somewhat in your control.

Take it one hour at a time. One day must seem like a lot right now.
Keep your body hydrated and eat if you can.
Find someone who can support you in real life.
Do regular Stretches to stretch out your neck and back. I found that I held a lot of tension there and it caught up.
Practice breathing exercises
Do not be afraid to get in touch with your gp for medication or sleeping pills if you feel you need them.
Seek counselling via your gp

I know that none of this will relieve any of your stresses but I hope that it helps even a tiny bit, good luck to both of you. I will be thinking about you both.

I hope tomorrow goes as well as it possibly can. Nothing will really make it easier for you, but do take care of yourself too.

I hope the operation goes well, sending love and best wishes to you both.

Hope it all goes well, thinking of you both tomorrow.

Wishing you all the best

I've just said a prayer and will be thinking about you both. X

Greentrees I'm so sorry to read about the loss of your darling son

Thank you all for the lovely words!
As far as I know, the surgery went well. It is still early to say something, we will find out things only when she wakes up.
I believe all the prayers helped.
We need to keep praying for a good recovery

Big hugs ❤️ thinking of you both

@Greentrees33 I am so sorry to hear about your loss.
I have been feeling the same you as you since we found out about this. But I am being strong for her as I am the only person she has.
God bless you

Please accept a virtual hand hold for you both.

Glad surgery went well, fingers crossed for a great result 🤞

Hi all!
She is awake! She recognizes me. Can't identify my voice but knows it is familiar. She doesn't remember the story of our relationship. Doctors have been showing her some photos and she gradually remembers a few things.
She has promising signs of getting well!

Great news!! I hope she carries on improving. Hope you’re looking after yourself too

Brilliant, hopefully as the swelling goes down more will come back x

I’m so sorry for what you’re going through OP, it must be unbearably hard for you. I’m glad the operation went well and that all the signs are promising.
If it helps, my father was diagnosed with glioblastoma in November, and we were told he may only have weeks to live. They operated successfully, but he was very, very confused for a few days afterwards, which was a combination of the steroids, the operation, and the swelling. A couple of months later the fog had cleared and he was back to being himself. I hope you can take comfort from this - the only advice I can offer is to take each day as it comes and to not think too far ahead or to worry about the future. Easier said than done I know. Wishing you all the best x

@LadyGrey66 it does feel better knowing this. I am less worried about the memory, but she is feeling bad that she doesn't remember our history, first kiss, first date. And she is struggling with that thinking it is unfair with me.
Her tumor is one grade down from your father's, and she has been giving 5 years.

Hi all,
She remembered few things, details. And we talked a lot today. She is rediscovering herself and get to know me as the first time.
But in the end of the day she said she likes me and would date me 😂

That’s really positive OP, great news. It’s such early days, I’m sure with time she’ll remember more and more. We were told to think of it like this; if you broke a leg, you’d rest the leg completely while it healed. But the brain can’t do that - it’s trying to heal after the operation while doing everything else it normally does, so is under immense strain, especially in the very early days. I hope you have another good day today. Have they doctors said when she may be able to come home?