Very silly and embarassing question

[EverySingleStar]

I'm a lesbian trying to conceive with my partner (she will be the one carrying the baby) with a known donor. In about 3 years time I will hopefully be TTC with number 2 (same donor).

Both of us are pretty much gold stars and this is going to sound like a very silly question but I'm honestly worried about it...

Will either of us be able to have a vaginal birth? Sorry! Sorry!

dp has just taken the piss out of me for not having heard of gold stars. I am obviously very out of touch with where the hip cats are at these days

if you've got a gold star, my bith definately earned me a big fat 'X'

or even a '0'

!!

ESS think of the Virgin Mary - she managed it, and so will you and your partner. I had no idea women who have not been penetrated by a man would imagine the experience was in any way comparable to childbirth! We all face that hurdle as equals, no matter how the baby was started.

LG, I do think there should be SOME kind of medal/award/recognition for a quarter-century's devoted service to the sapphic cause.

It's the only honour I'm ever likely to be awarded

EES not only am I a "gold star" (love that term, never heard it before today!) but have vaginismus too & I managed a vaginal birth and it was fine (I did get a tear but it was honestly fine, nothing terrible and I know plenty of women who conceived in the usual manner and tore more badly than I did when giving birth).

Hope that helps a bit. Best of luck with your TTC plans.

EES? I mean ESS, obviously.

EverySingleStar - I love you! you have brightened up my Saturday night! The thought that a penis coudld prepare a vagina for birth is just brilliant! (I wish - and yes DH may be huge, but no where near a circumferance of 13cm like DS1's head!)

Good luck with the vaginal births.

And virginal births!

Some women like to streach thier vaginas befroe birth, and lube with oil to get it extra stretchy.

For the record, I never did.

Look, you are in the same boat as so many women who have had IVF, so you definitely aren't alone.

Once you (or DP) has conceived, you will be subjected to the usual maternity services. No one seems bothered by how you have conceived.

Good luck

Actually, DS1's head circumference was 37cm!

I dont' think IVF is invovled here - is it?

Hi EverySingleStar,
Me and my partner are also just starting out on TTC (grin)We are going down the clinic route using an anonymous donor. It would be good to keep in touch with each other's journeys as we don't know any other same sex couples TTC at the moment.

Loads of luck. It's all very excitingand nerve wracking at the same time isn't it.

There is certainy loads of support and information on MN it seems.

See you around (smile)

Susie Bright (remember her anyone?) recommended fisting as preparation for childbirth, saying it was the same as perineal massage - I can honestly say this is Not True. So I really don't think virginity, however it is defined, makes a difference.