School Leavers day

[GaynorGoodwin]

Hi, I'm new to this so hope I'm posting correctly...my 16 year old daughter (who is gay) tells me she has no intention of going to the school leavers day as she won't wear a dress (she's always hated them anyway) but I kind of feel that she may miss out on a good day with her friends (who are very much going) so am I right to leave it as its her decision and not really mine? Advice welcome, thanks.

Purple..I wouldn't be able to make a 16 year old go now would I really? Be sensible now.
Er, what's that supposed to be in response to? You ask in your op if you're right to leave the decision up to her, the implication being you were considering whether you should insist she goes. No need to be snippy.

Purple.. Your getting your knickers twisted now.

You either are reading more into my posts than is there or you're deliberately looking for a fight.

I'm not interested.

Can she not dress how she wants?

Gaynor, it's not easy for you or your daughter. My dc, attending an all girls school, wouldn't be seen dead in a dress and went to the leavers ball (black tie dress code) in a full tuxedo with make up. You could bring a partner, so there were boys in tuxedos as well (less standing out). Some gay friends went in dresses because that's what they feel comfortable in. As it's a leavers ball and she won't see most people again, maybe you can convince her it doesn't matter what everyone else thinks? Good luck.

Hermit - yeah we've spoken about it again and she's considering trying on a dress just to see how she feels. I'm not pressuring her as it is her decision but suppose at the back of my mind I'm thinking she'll not have this chance to be with all her friends before she finishes. Good on your dd though for doing what she thinks and feels... it has been tough for me but I'm feeling better about it than previous.