Ex-partner wants house bought with inheritance despite my name on deeds

[Guffy]

My partner and I were together for 10 years. I loved her dearly and believe we had a strong relationship. About 5 years in she came into a sum of money after her father sadly died and she decided to buy a house with the money so we could set up home together. She decided to put my name on the deeds effectively giving me half the house. I cautioned her at the time that it was a big step and a generous gift but she said she loved me and it was our home. A year or so ago, after 6 months of lying and deceiving me, she left me for a local man. I now live in the house on my own but she is indicating that the house belongs to her because she ‘paid for it with my dad’s money’. Where do I stand legally please?

Did you pay any money into the mortage/house?

OP where were you living before you

1. Moved in with OP and
2. What was the previous joint home?

It's an easy decision and there are two options -

Take your 50% by selling and realising the proceeds, or buy her 50% out.
or
Reach a settlement via solicitors for a smaller percentage.

Which of these options would you prefer OP?

Did you not provide anthhing towards the house home improvements etc if the answers no then you shouldnt profit off her stupidity.

There is a difference between legal owner and beneficial owner. If you paid nothing towards the house and nothing towards any mortgage or repairs/extensions then whilst you have legal ownership a court would be entitled to find your ownership equates to little or no financial amount.

If I were advising her I would tell her to issue a TOLATA claim immediately.

Cheating is awful. I say this as the ex wife of a cheating husband who had more than 50 affairs as it turned out. But dont take her money. That she got because someone who loved her died. That's beyond low.

She was an idiot. If you had children together then my answer would be different or if this had been your home for your adult life in a very long relationship then I’d say differently but you don’t have kids with her and this was a later in life relationship and your finances would have been your own responsibility for a long time before her, so she isn’t really obligated to support you, is she?

She was stupid to put you on the deeds but you know that, and you know that money came from her dad. So… why would you want to take it? Just stop. Move out and give her the house back. It isn’t yours. Benefitting because she was a complete idiot is really cruel and wrong. You know that money was her dad’s.

Did she buy house outright or was there a mortgage on it that you both paid equally?

You legally have a claim on the property which you can pursue. At best it will entitle you to either buy her out or receive half the equity if you aren’t married.

Your morals in this situation are on you. In terms of my morals I don’t see how being in a relationship someone means you get half a house. Ethically our society allows it because historically and in the present day women were and are disadvantaged in terms of employment and parenthood. It also allows it where one spouse (this is where marriage is relevant) would be disadvantaged because they cannot work due to age or health.

Make up your mind and tell her.

Your age doesn't make a difference. You know the answer OP, legally you are on the deeds, but morally you shouldn't be there. You know that, which is why you objected when she first wanted to do it, so not sure why you're so surprised at the answers. You could ask her to buy you out I suppose. Unfortunately you are not going to have a peaceful life while you are there, she will keep on asking for her house back. If she ha chidren, they will no doubt pick up the mantle. You haven't lost out completely as you've had the benefit of living rent /mortgage free for years. Do you really want to spend your final years fighting over your home? The job and adult children that you moved away from are largely irrelevant.

That doesn't give you the right to effectively steal her house from her its not yours you paid nothing for it yet are living in it alone.
You need to move out asap

Morally and legally 1/2 house is yours. If it was a woman posting the responses would be very different.

Please don't listen to other posters and contact a solicitor ASAP. She made her bed, now she just has to lie it in...

I know someone who has just got divorced. House is in her nane, she paid for it ... he's getting 50% (he did lie though and said he'd contributed).

Her lying and deceiving aside, you really should find yourself somewhere else to stay.

Morally you have no entitlement but even legally, it would be hard to justify you retaining half, especially since not being married.

Mumsnet is very biased against men unfortunately, just search for similar threads posted by men and you'll see 95% of responses are "cheating scum, you DESERVE 50% of house"

At 67 why have you not made provisions for yourself before retirement age rather than freeloading off a generous partner?

Prior to the relationship what were your plans for pensionable age? Winging it?

Just seen, you’ve not even contributed to the home - legally being on the deeds you could argue you are owed 50% but if she fought you in court I doubt you’d be coming away with much.

Key word there is divorced. That house was half his, whether he paid for it or not. Because he had the protection of marriage. As it should be. This OP doesn’t, and he knows it’s wrong for him to take this house as he told her so at the time of purchase.

In a marriage, as almost every other thread is, then yes. The house is jointly worked - a marital asset.

This OP wasn’t married, and he told her at the time not to put him on the deeds because he knew it would be wrong of him to claim the house. They’re both older adult, and were older adults with grown up kids when they got together. Their finances are their own affair, they didn’t have a life together with intertwined money and expenses of kids or life.

The case seems a bit different if you are retirement age - you aren't realistically going to be able to magic up a house at 67. You need to decide what you can deal with, what means you can carry on with your life, and then take proper legal advice to see how much of that is obtainable.

I would expect you to have a claim if your name is on the Deeds but IANAL.

The house is legally owned 50:50 between OP & their errant partner. They need to sell the house & split the proceeds.

Legally it’s half yours so it needs to be sold and you each move on with half each.
At the end of the day if she hadn’t cheated you’d have a stable home.

Definitely would be different answers if it was a woman.

You need proper legal advice. On the surface, you'd be entitled to 50% of any equity on the property. However, have you contributed financially towards the property in any way? Mortgage (assuming there is one), paying rent, house repairs/maintenance? If not, then you've been living mortgage/rent free for a number of years. Presumably if you'd been living on your own, you wouldn't have been able to do this?

No one on here is a legal expert, so for proper advice, you need an appointment with a solicitor.

Personally, I think you want to take the 50% of the equity, even though you probably know morally you shouldn't. You want to take that equity, not because you're entitled to it, but to punish your ex for cheating. Yes, I do understand the anger, disappointment and resentment, you'd have towards your ex. Her behaviour has pulled the rug from under you, and taken away the future you thought you had.

You're on the deeds. Legally speaking it's half yours. Sit tight would be my advice.

Legally its half yours. Morally you haven’t paid anything towards it. So decision is yours really where you go with this.