Am i stupid wanting a trust will rather than a mirror will?

[ssd]

We earn low wages, haven't been abroad for 6 years. Im considering a more indepth will which i think costs about £1000.
And looking at it objectively, theres no need. I worry about money and the future and dont want my kids renting forever. Ds pays a fortune in rent right now. I want them buying property but i know these days its a million times harder than it was for me in the 90s.

Im married, straightforward and simple, 2 kids. I know if i died (and i have health anxiety which plays into this) my dh would find someone else and remarry without it being a big fuss. Hes a really nice person and im sure he'd meet someone similar. But probably a bit younger than him. With younger kids. Which id be all for as i want him to be happy.

But...if he dies first she gets everything. Everything I've scrimped and saved for. I do all the finances here, dh has no clue. So she gets everything and its up to her what my kids get.

Which absolutely kills me. If they dont get anything from us they are fecked. So this small house/any savings would go to another family.

Do other people worry about this when you're both healthy and this is all pie in the sky stuff??

Am i being daft? Its not that i dont trust dh, but like i said hes a nice guy who doesn't worry or think about money like i do and wouldn't realise what getting remarried means legally with regards our kids and any inheritance.

Its all driving me nuts.

Can anyone talk to me. Please.

On a recommendation from an MN thread I used her, and agree she is very good and reasonably priced too.

At the time, I needed to make a separate Will from my then DP, now EXDP. as we were contemplating marriage. She helped put together a document which excluded EXDP and EXDSS and focussed only on my DC. Just as well, as the inevitable split came about 18 months later, and my document is still good, and sitting at the National Will centre (or something similar) until needed.

You’re absolutely right to think about it. The worst happened to Lynda Bellingham’s (Bisto lady etc) sons. A famous case, but I’m sure there are more.

https://willwritten.com/legacy-advice/lynda-bellinghams-sons-betrayed-as-feared#:~:text=Having%20executed%20a%20Traditional%20Will,leave%20to%20whomever%20he%20chooses.

Sadly it’s not just if the next spouse dies. As we can see from LB case, you can’t know how people will behave, where money is concerned. I’m sure she had no doubts whatsoever about a mirror will. But look how he behaved.

As a child of a widower who subsequently remarried, I think you'd be very wise to secure your DC's inheritance. I have very little prospect of seeing any of the money my DF left to his second wife (ie his entire estate), with the intention that any residue would be split fairly amongst their respective DC upon her death. She's already given her child a six figure lump sum from it. She even kept some of our late mother's belongings, which had sentimental value only. Ugh. No, you do what you have to.

Honestly, I don't know.

We're not in the UK....

Isn't the whole point of a will though to determine what your wishes are (despite one's marital status)

You can leave your half of the house in trust to your kids with a clause that leaves your portion to them but the surviving partner is able to live in the property. So they don't get it until you both die. This protects at least half of the house in the event of remarriage if you die or even should one of you need to pay for a care home.

It's not stupid. You're just prepared for all eventuality. No-one ever thinks it will happen to them. Until it does.

It’s a bit of a pain because you need to name someone to look after the trust. And pay for this. But better than the alternative!

There’s a term for what you describe, it’s ‘sideways dis-inheritance’

where the surviving parent’s new spouse outlives them and leaves everything to their own children.

our solicitor built mine and my husbands wills to prevent against this on either side, which included changing us to tenants in common. It cost around £1000 including the severance of joint tenancy.

Yes. Please do this @ssd. I think you are being extremely sensible. As someone who was sideways disinherited 13 years ago, I cannot tell you the resentment I feel and the damage it has done to relations between the two sides of the family.

I didn't even think this was possible. I definitely want to do this. I would like to also broach the subject of setting up trusts for my children with grandparents, as they are far wealthier than us, and I would like their money to go straight to my children when they die. I think the can set up educational trusts. But I also want our house to go to our children. I will never remarry but I cant force DH to not remarry if I die. We do need to sort out our wills too.

I will definitely do this.

It will be best money you ever spend.

Well done for making the decision @ssd

Thank you

As someone who has dealt with this several times, I would advocate taking an accountants advice alongside the solicitor, when putting together trusts (we have 2, one activated and running caused by a death, one in an as yet un-activated will) to make sure they are tax efficient and permit the various nil rate IHT bands to be used, jumping generations can have the unfortunate effect of making the funds liable to a nice 40% charge by the HMRC, as can the wrong type of trust, some trusts get charged 6% of the trust value every 10 years.

Solicitors are not generally bothered by this as it occurs long after they have done their thing.

Also be wary of solicitors writing themselves in as executor or trustee where they can rake off up to 2% of the estate value or charge you a hefty fee to resign.

as with everything, looked into carefully it's great, but badly done it's worse than useless.

A decent solicitor most definitely should advise on the different types. Look for one who is STEP qualified and an actual solicitor ( not a Will writer who are not qualified and regulated in the same way). You do not need separate advice from an accountant on the IHT unless you have complex business holdings.

OP the kind of trust you are considering is a life interest or ‘interest in possession trust’. This does not have the tax consequences mentioned above which only apply to discretionary trusts and only if the amount in the discretionary trust is over the nil rate band (£325k).

The life interest trust set up in will and coming into effect on death preserves the nil rate band and transferable nil rate band (between married couples) and does not have ongoing tax charges. It didn’t sound from your first post that IHT was a particular concern of yours anyway due to the values.

All you need is decent life insurance , say £300k - written in trust with your kids as beneficiaries, obviously if you died while they are minors, your husband would be the trustee but as soon as they are adults, they would get the money and it would be outside your estate, so no IHT.
£300k cover costs my 34 year old DD £35 a month.
Better than leaving them half a house that could have unintended consequences.
It’s the obvious solution.

Oh and it’s free to put life insurance in trust.
Why piss about with wills and solicitors when you can sort it so easily?

That really only works if you die young, for obvious reasons insurance companies won't insure against death in old age, or where they do will make sure they have covered the loss.

Most life insurance policies expire before the average old age death, and those that don't incur ever higher premiums, policies designed for the over 50's only offer much smaller payouts.

Fair enough to have insurance when you are younger, but for the cost of a grand or so it pays to keep your main assets protected as far as possible.