Will reading - can executor exclude DIL of dear departed from attending

[Macmoominmamma]

Hi all

Grateful for your wise advice please.

FIL is receiving end of his life care and is currently in hospital, too weak to be moved. He has left a Will and named executors for his Will reading. DIL and he have long been hostile and he wants her excluded from this Will reading, with only BIL, DH and myself in attendance. BIL’s wife (DIL) is kicking off and insisting on attending the Will reading.

DH doesn’t want her to attend as he knows his DF can’t stand her. And frankly SIL can’t stand her FIL either 🤷‍♀️.

Question is - can the executors decide who can attend. And does it make a difference if DH and BIL are the executors? Context DH and BIL are cordial but tense as SIL has caused friction between them.

Families eh! 😔

Definitely. Why is the solicitor even involved?

One hopes the solicitor is charging handsomely for indulging this pointless dramatic nonsense

He or she will be. The poor man isn’t even dead yet, and they are arguing about some ludicrous reading of the Will and thinking of how to bully the sil. It’s just all so distasteful .

I think some times peoples behaviour deteriorates so badly they don’t realise just how distasteful it is until they tell the outside world about it.

I agree with just getting the Will sent to you all, what is the actual point of a meeting to read it, especially if all is not well with the dynamics between the people attending.

If I were you I’d say to your FIL it all seems sorted and thank him for preparing the will and for being so kind as to leave things to you. The. deal with he drama after he has gone. He doesn’t need to know about it does he. Personally if SIL is so terrible I’m guessing the Will could be the last contact you have.

Being a beneficiary doesn’t give you the legal right to see the will before probate though.
And without being cruel, FIL will be dead by this time. So he will have no idea if you’re there or not!

What a dramatic fuss. Where is the will, who are the executors. Once the poor man has died there will be more important things to sort out than reading through his will unless there are funeral wishes in there. Can't you just have the executors there together informally and set up a Skype if it's that important to you.

There is no reason for you to be at any meeting with the solicitor OP. Your dh and his db are executors and only they have a role to play in the process.