Big family issues after proceeds of estate paid

[SickWithWorry123]

I'm posting this as a last resort and also for clarification on whether I am in the wrong.

For clarity I have spoken to my Solicitor who advises that they/I have done nothing wrong.

I know I'm not thinking clearly, I'm feel broken, suicidal as I can see no way through this.

This is a long story but I will attempt to be as concise as possible without omitting important details.

My Grandma passed away 2 years ago. Myself and my now deceased Dad were Executors. Probate was granted December 2022. My Dad passed away earlier this year, unexpectedly, which left me the only remaining Executor. Proceeds of the estate were paid about 6 weeks ago to the remaining 7 beneficiaries. My Dads share was paid to me, as Executor of my Grandma's estate to be distributed to any beneficiaries once probate has been granted on his estate.

He died before making a Will so according to the rules of intestacy his estate will be divided between his 3 children as he was not married. I am one of the 3 children.

The funds from my Grandma's estate are sitting in an Executor account in my name.

This is where it gets difficult. There is no relationship between myself and my 2 sisters. They have been informed I have the money and they believe I have "stolen" it. Apparently the probate solicitor should not have transferred the money to me, as executor and trustee of my Grandma's estate and they are going to sue the Solicitor.

Today, one of the sisters turned up at my house trying to break the door door and smash my windows. She has threatened to kill my partner and me and is going to poison my dog. I am petrified as she is more than capable of this, I 100% believe that she will follow through with her threats.

The police attended earlier and are going to pop round and see her at some point over the next few days. The crime would only be breach of the peace though as the threats to kill are not recorded on the short video clip I was able to take.

They have advised me to get a civil injunction? I've spoken to a DV charity who are calling me back tomorrow but I don't know what to do next.

This is the culmination of years or abuse, harassment and coercion that I have had to put up with. I'm drained.

I guess I'm hoping that someone who has been through something similar or someone with legal knowledge can advise. Or anyone can reassure me that I haven't done anything wrong.

Sorry for the long post.

Obviously her behaviour is unacceptable.

However, is there a reason why you haven’t passed on the money they have rightfully inherited?

So you have your dad's share of your grandmother's estate, to be split between you and your two sisters, sitting in an executor account in your name?

What are you waiting for to transfer your sisters their ⅓ of this money - for probate to be granted on your dad's estate?

I’m assuming the funds haven’t been transferred to your siblings yet as your dads estate has not yet been dealt with @SickWithWorry123 ?

It won't get distributed until her Dad's estate is settled, the inheritance has been paid to his estate and needs to go through probate.

It's not the op fault she was the executor of her grandmas will.

Because probate (or whatever it's called for intestate estates) hasn't yet been granted so her dad's estate, which includes his share of the grandmothers estate, cannot yet be distributed. The grandmothers estate, other than her dad's share, has been distributed in full.

Which is all exactly as it should be. OP (or !)

Yes, probate hasn't been applied for yet. The wording on the Solicitors letter states "money to be held by Executor/Trustee until probate is granted "

I was told not to do anything with the money until this point as if it was paid to anyone other then the Executor(s) I would be held personally liable if the funds weren't divided correctly.

You're sister behaviour is unacceptable.

If probate isn't granted yet there is nothing you can do. It took 16 months for my FIL's probate to be granted and it's all being paid directly into DP's account which he then passes half onto his sister.

But your fathers money from his inheritance is part of that probate. Your solicitor should be able to tell you this?

Correct, I am waiting for the Sisters to decide on a Solicitor to deal with his estate. They had wanted to apply for probate themselves but without a Will I understand the process is more complicated

then nothing is wrong. tell the sisters that when the probate is approved and the conditions are right, the money will be divided

@SickWithWorry123 Yeah that’s what I thought. You’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I wouldn’t engage with your siblings directly at all to be honest. And definitely phone the police again regarding any harassment and threats.

Are you able to pay your solicitor to send letters to your siblings stating that the money must be held until your dads estate is settled?

I'd transfer her share as soon as you are legally allowed, and get the injunction as you shouldn't have any reason to deal with her ever again. And tell her all communication needs to go through the solicitor.

If you really want to wash your hands of the whole thing, you can resign as executor of your grandmother's will and have the solicitor appointed as administrator. Then your sister can't say you've stolen it or that you've taken what is rightfully hers. They will charge for this though.

If I'm completely honest, I have no faith in anyone anymore. Years of bullying has left me unable to think clearly. I have been harassed and coerced into doing things for one of the sisters. Im completely unable to advocate for myself.

I think the simplest thing is for you as executor to get the solicitor to write a letter to the sisters explaining the situation ie the funds are held and cannot be paid until the probate is settled. The cost for doing this can come out of the estate.

What a nightmare for you

I can do yes, she will charge a ridiculous amount but I need them to understand that I am only following instructions from the Solicitor.

no legal help here. But what an an absolute shit your sister is.

from a practical point I would get cctv (arlo is good as you don’t need to screw then in), and a ring / arlo doorbell. I’d also get a cover for my postbox so she couldn’t post anything through to poison the dog.

sorry your going through this.

How are your sisters so awful and u sound so nice and normal

I would see the ridiculous money paid for a letter each as a necessity for my sanity.

@SickWithWorry123

I'd get the injunction and have cctv installed (I got a cheap £30 camera) paid extra for the subscription to record, just last week and it's just facing the front of the house from a window)

If your sister is threatening to sue. She will have to do so via a solicitor I presume who will tel her you're acting within the law.

Thank you and yes she is, that's what drugs do to you I guess. Desperation makes people do crazy things. She had her share of my Grans estate 6 weeks ago and has probably burned through the lot, that's why she wants her share of Dad's estate.

I have 2 cameras on the front of my house covering the door and windows and our 2 cars as I know she will target these as she can't get to me.

Already taped up the letterbox from the inside as I wouldn't put it past her to post something through/set fire to the house.

Have you told them you need to wait for probate to go through?

Why do they think you can distribute the money before probate is complete?

Once probate is granted, it is common to wait at least 6 months before distributing the funds in case anyone makes a claim against the estate.

Are you able to appoint the solicitor to handle matters and keep the funds in their client account?

The facts seem to be:

Your Grandmother (GMA) died with a will splitting her estate between 7 people one of whom was your Father. Probate to wind up and administer her estate was granted to you and your Father.

Before GMA's estate was distributed your Father died. He left no will so his estate will be divided under the law of intestacy. His share of GMAs estate is an asset of/debt due to him and is, in turn, part of his estate.

Under the law of intestacy those taking responsibility for winding up your Father's estate, unless it's very small, will need to apply for Letters of Administration.

You hold his share of GMA's estate as some species of Trustee until somebody has either Letters of Administration, or a good and legally bombproof reason why they're not required.

Then, and only then, you can pay the seventh to the Admors who must, in turn, add it to his other assets which, after paying the estates debts - funeral and anything else, share it to those entitled.

Anyone threatening you, or your poor dog, HAS to be reported to the Police.

I'm sorry about the loss of your grandmother and father.

When did your Dad die?

If your fathers money is in an executors account then doesn't that mean you have already confirmed you are administering his estate? Or is it in animal acccount in your name?

Is there a reason you haven't applied to administer his estate? Waiting for your estranged siblings to do something seems like it will cause more problems. You can call the Probate Call Centre for advice,

Telephone: 0300 303 06488 
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Email: [email protected]k_

Normal* not animal

I'm sire she would tell you a very different story where I am the big, evil Sister who has "stolen" Dads money.

I've always been the "odd one out" as I have done well for myself, have a good job, own house, cars etc. They have both struggled with addiction and holding onto jobs.

It's a horrible situation which has caused me to go no contact with my Mum for a number of years and low contact with Sisters to protect my sanity. Although I may seem "normal" to outsiders and quite "together" I have struggled with mental health and I'm so lonely, I have no-one apart from my partner and adult Daughter.

My dog is everything to me, if anything happens to her, I won't go on.