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DH’s will and my step kids

81 replies

Sosadsadsad · 26/03/2023 17:38

I’ve been married to DH for 25 years. He’s my soul mate and he’s very unwell. I’m hoping he’ll pull through but we had a few frank conversations, got out our wills etc.

his will I’m an executor along side his three children (all early forties married with their own children). I thought it was all laid out quite straight forward who gets what etc. I get the house, his pension. The kids get his cash (Upto the point they don’t pay inheritance tax). The plan being that I pass on more to them in my will if I survive him.

I get along really well with his kids but a friend of mine thinks one DH DC is likely to cause a fuss when their dad goes. I am a bit shocked, but actually they’ve had moments in the past so has left me wondering.

the house is in his name. He lived here before me. Paid it off a few years ago. Told me he wouldn’t have been able to keep it if I hadn’t moved in when I did. So I’ve paid toward all the bills (not mortgage) etc ever since I’ve lived here 27 years.

can this one DC, or all three if they want to cause me to lose my home? Can they put a spanner in the works of what I thought was a straight forward legal document? I know I probably need to see a solicitor but can’t see how I can get away at the moment to do it.

OP posts:
Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 17:48

I think the situation with the OP's DD is complicated. The OP hasn't paid any mortgage or rent for decades, just bills which she would always have had to pay. And the OP's money is all going to her DD.

So the DD kind of has benefited from her stepfather even if not as directly. If the OP had had to spend money on rent/mortgage interest over the years, she wouldn't have had as much to leave her DD.

Howtostart · 27/03/2023 20:09

Contrary to how some on here might wish. Being a second wife does not make you second best ! Step children /children who are non-dependent have no 'rights' above you. You are your husbands wife and have the EXACT same matrimonial property rights as any wife of such a long marriage.

Concentrate on your husband. None of this matters now. The kids . His, yours or anyone has no entitlement to anything. You are the one with rights enshrined in the matrimonial property Act.

Who gets what are the decisions for the survivor which will hopefully be in many years to come That is for you or him to decide as and when.

Comii9 · 27/03/2023 20:13

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 17:48

I think the situation with the OP's DD is complicated. The OP hasn't paid any mortgage or rent for decades, just bills which she would always have had to pay. And the OP's money is all going to her DD.

So the DD kind of has benefited from her stepfather even if not as directly. If the OP had had to spend money on rent/mortgage interest over the years, she wouldn't have had as much to leave her DD.

Exactly. We all have bills. OP has lived rent free for 27 years.... she's had a good run if you ask me. Mortgage has been fully paid off yet she is claiming DH couldn't of done it without her. It sounds off to me and it doesn't sit right morally wanting to change a will whilst someone is extremely poorly!

MissLucyEyelesbarrow · 27/03/2023 20:22

Exactly. We all have bills. OP has lived rent free for 27 years.... she's had a good run if you ask me. Mortgage has been fully paid off yet she is claiming DH couldn't have done it without her. It sounds off to me and it doesn't sit right morally wanting to change a will whilst someone is extremely poorly

She isn't challenging the will. Read the OP. Her DH has left her the house. It's the kids who may challenge the will. That is the entire point of the OP. How could you read it and get the wrong end of the stick this badly?

And your tone is unpleasant, given that her DH may be dying. Talking about a 'good run' when she is frightened about losing her home. I hope that, if you are ever in a similar situation, you are treated with more compassion than you have shown her.

Villssev · 28/03/2023 06:00

Being a second wife does not make you second

My second husband (theoretical) always would be second best to my children and I would expect the same vice versa

Comii9 · 28/03/2023 06:41

@MissLucyEyelesbarrow this isn't what would be on my mind given a poorly husband. It comes across as grabby.

I haven't misunderstood. I read that it was OPS friend actually that suggest her DH kids may kick up a fuss. Another poster said OPS friend sounded like a shit stirrer.

You are the one who has got the wrong end of the stick. Thanks for your input.

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