School being ridiculous about priority contact.

[Rich1981]

Hello, my son is 8yo he stays with me 6 nights per week. I wanted to apply for child benefit, but first I asked school to put me as priority contact. School knows what days am picking him up and that my son stays with me as he was unhappy with 50/50 two years ago. He was put on SEND program because of his behaviour during 50/50 shared care. The school telling me that, whoever registered child years ago has to be priority contact. I changed them on policy. They said that they don't have one and that's how it is. I spoke to lawyer and was told that school is being ridiculous, am a parent and if child is with me most of time plus I live closer to school than his mother it's only logical to put me as 1st contact. I spoke to principal and he said that,it doesn't really matter,if something happens they will call me as they know am primary parent. So then I said to change it! He told me that unfortunately it has to be the way receptionist says ( older woman sitting there all day) . Guys this is some clown show! What do I do with this? Complain to whom? Or just leave it,as it's not a big deal since they have both addresses?
Am I going crazy or am really being treated unfairly and being discriminated against?

You and Mum can both be given Priority 1 status, ie jointly.

You've posted about this before and it does sound rather strange that the school won't change it.
Are they completely aware that your son lives with you almost full time? Is it just the office staff you are talking to?
I would ask for a sit down meeting with the head teacher to discuss this.
People must have to change their children's personal details all the time in schools (moving house, getting a new phone number etc).

Sorry - I've just seen you have spoken to the head.
I would still ask for another meeting to discuss this. Surely they really need to know exactly where your child lives - which is with you.

"older woman sitting there all day" 🙄

I wonder what they would do if the child came into care and the priority contact has to then change to the foster carer? Ask them that

"older woman sitting there all day"

Really? You lost any support there. And please don't be so stupid as to think any receptionist dictates school policy to a head teacher.

My dad was ds priority contact the whole way through school.

I registered him and claimed Cb and tax credits for him.

It's based on who the child usually lives with.

( older woman sitting there all day)

Would you like to explain this?

Ignoring the comment about the admin sitting there all day, because I can guarantee they won't be.....
The priority can easily be changed unless there has been SS involvement or a court order or a note on the system in the past that suggests this isn't appropriate. I have never heard of the person who registered the child having to be priority 1, although most of the time this is the case because the person will have put their name first on the form and that is how it is input on the system.
The priority 1 contact received the FSM vouchers during lockdown and is usually the one who will received text messages on the messaging system as a lot of them only allow one contact.
I've never heard that child benefits rely on what level of priority you are though. You may not live with the child, but may be able to collect them easily during the day if they fall ill so would make sense to be priority 1, but you wouldn't qualify for child benefit as the child resides elsewhere.

@christmasbaublesandtinseltits if you've read the OPs other posts you will see that his son lives with him 6 days a week. Quite frankly he should be receiving the child benefit.

My post was poorly worded, I meant that someone may not live with the child but could be a better choice to be priority 1 due to logistics during the school day, but that someone wouldn't be entitled to child benefit. I wasn't talking about OP in this instance.

Ah ok @christmasbaublesandtinseltits .
The OP has posted about this several times and I just don't understand why he isn't getting listened to by the school.
Obviously I don't know the full story but I feel quite sorry for him.

What has the receptionists age got to do with the price of fish?

So they will phone you first anyway? Why does it matter what’s in the system then?

@LittleBearPad it will matter when it comes to applying for secondary schools and entry criteria is usually distance from "home to school".
This boy's home is with his Dad. That's what his address should be.

But his home address won’t be taken from the school’s contact database? You fill it in on the admissions form.

@LittleBearPad yes but they ask for proof of address. The OP can't get his child registered at the doctor's under his address (that was in a previous post), he can't get Child Benefit and he can't get the details changed at school.
So 'on paper' this child lives at his mum's. But he doesn't. He lives with his Dad.

But the father’s address will also be on the records. It’s just not an issue

have you written to the school governors? set out clearly what has happened and why the wrong registration disadvantages your son.

You don't need to be contact 1 to claim CB.

But you can also be placed as contact 1 regardless of who registered the child at the school.
Do you have a court order stating the days child is with you? That should be more than sufficient to get it changed if they're being funny about changing it.

Have you tried using GDPR, the school is holding inaccurate data and you are requesting it is corrected?

Admissions will often phone the primary school to see what address is recorded in their system if it differs to what is on the application form for the secondary school. So this could cause issues in this instance, though a sensible admin would be able to explain living situation. Claiming child benefit shouldn't be influenced by what is on the school system though, I wouldn't think. I haven't seen other posts from the OP, is there no proof that the child lives with him? What about the SEND programme? What address was used for correspondance for that? What system do the school use? You should be able to find this out by asking for a student update form? Each year the school should, at some point send a form out to parents asking for you to check that all details are up to date and give you the opportunity to change them. This is when parents can change the priorities/phone numbers/email addresses/addresses/contacts. But it there can also be a logo at the top which says what the MIS is, you could contact the company directly to see what they say.
Could you ask for a subject access request?

But this is mad? Kids move all the time - why on earth wouldn't they be able to update simple details (the school, the doctors, everyone) - I've moved so many times, and just gone in and updated details at various relevant parties no problem!

Of course they can change the priority contact - what if a parent died or left the country?

older woman sitting there all day

I'm pretty sure this ^ attitude is the reason you're not getting anywhere tbh. I wouldn't be helpful to you either.

What’s the value? They have said they will contact you in the event of an emergency. It won’t affect you when you apply for schools as you would just put your address. What actual difference does this make.