Executor of a will

[TheChosenTwo]

Hi, I couldn’t find an appropriate place to put this so at least here, if it’s in the wrong place, it will disappear in time.
I’ve been asked to be (and accepted the offer) an executor of a relatives will.
I haven’t seen the will.
Can anyone who has carried out duties as an executor please talk me through, step by step, what they did when the time came?
The solicitor did tell me at the time but I’ve still got lots of questions that I didn’t think to ask at the time as we were dealing with a lot of other stuff.
Just to add, my relative is still alive so it’s not like I need to jump into action ASAP, I’d just like to have an idea of what I might be doing, time frames, oh I don’t know really.
Have been researching a bit online but it’s a minefield really so would hugely appreciate someone sharing their experiences first hand if they felt able to.
TIA

I am in Australia.
After death, arranged cremation and carried out wishes re ashes.
Contacted solicitor and gave him copy of will.
Paid all outstanding bills. Sorted tax bill.
Solicitor arranged for bank accounts, shares etc to be sorted.
6 month wait for will to go to probate.
Emptied out flat and arranged for it to be let short term.
After probate, distribution of cash as per will.
Arranged for flat to be sold.
Sold flat, sorted final tax bill.
Paid solicitor
distribution of cash from sale of flat.

Thanks for the response.
Did you have to register the death first? Here, we can’t start anything until the death is registered I believe.
Did you need to order death certificates (and if so, how many)?
Did you need to set up an executors account?
My relative already has a solicitor that I have visited with them several times. It’s very far out of my way and not near where I live. Once relative has passed away, can I part ways with them and use a solicitor local to me so I’m not driving 2 hours each time? Or will I not need to see the solicitor again?
Finally, I’m presuming as executor the financial aspects of paying for everything will fall to me, but is it my responsibility to contact the beneficiaries personally? As in, write them letters to tell them what’s happening?
Sorry, so many questions and maybe they don’t seem relevant but they’ve been keeping me up thinking about them.
I just wish there was one definitive checklist of what to do, I’m sure I’ll forget to do something and screw it up.
Thank you for sharing, I appreciate it might seem an insensitive question about something that’s possibly quite hard to talk about.

There's a lot of helpful information online. I used Gov.uk and Age Concern websites with searches like "What to do when a person dies" and "Duties of an executor".

If you are the sole executor you won't need to see the solicitor again. If the solicitor is named as your co-executor you can work through the process with her/him (but there will be a charge for their services, or ask them to renounce their executor status and you go it alone.

Thank you. I’ll check out the gov website again as I looked a few times and just found everything very confusing.
I’ll also have a house to deal with when the time comes which I’m not looking forward to.
I am the sole executor so good to know I won’t need the solicitor again.
Didn’t even think to look at the age concern website so thanks for that too.

I realise now after searching in the night that this would actually have fitted perfectly in the ‘legal matters’ topic.
Will ask MN if they can move it.

Hey, OP and no worries - we'll ping this one across for you now.

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/money-legal/legal-issues/power-of-attorney/what-do-executors-do/

This will answer all your questions.

Actually, I'd also ask the personnyoure being executor for to let yo have an original copy of the will. It may be many years before they die and wills can get lost!
Also, you don't have to use a solicitor at all. They charge a fortune! I did all of it myself when my DF died.
The executor doesn't register the death or arrange the funeral, the family do that. However, you need to be paying the costs out of the estate.

Thank you @CarolineMumsnet

I think my relative will be cagey about me having a copy of the will for some reason, he’s very private in some ways, he recently made amendments to his will (obviously I wasn’t in the meeting when he made these changes, I took him and sat outside waiting for him). I have no idea what the old will said and what changes he made although his solicitor took extra care to check I was in a good position to take on this role as he said the will could possibly cause problems further down the line.
So I’m not sure he’ll willingly give me a copy and I’m not inclined to push for it. We’ve put it away safely (at his house), we both know where it is and unless he moves it, I won’t forget where it is.
I am the family, pretty much all he has here anyway, as the executor I think it will be me organising the registering and funeral. How do I pay out of the estate? Sorry, that sounds like a really silly question.
I have POA over his financial and medical needs although as yet have had no need to implement my authority as he’s still capable of managing his affairs and his care with a little help (by a little help, I mean I take him when I can to appointments, take him shopping, change his bedding every week/fortnight depending on how often I can get down to see him, because he doesn’t have a tumble dryer and finds it physically quite challenging, that sort of thing. So just helping in my capacity as his relative at the moment).

My Uncle had a pre paid plan for After his death.
The hospital notified the funeral guys about the death, they then arranged the death certificate and cremation.
I did not have to pay from the estate.
This saved a lot of worry.
Maybe look at that kind of thing. It also opens up a conversation about type of funeral service your relative may want.

The solicitor said "said the will could possibly cause problems further down the line." ?

Did they tell you what sort of problems?
I thought that was the point of using solicitors, to prevent any problems?

I thought that was the point of using solicitors, to prevent any problems

A solicitor cannot prevent all problems. It may be, for example, that the solicitor is aware that the OP's relative is cutting someone out of their will who has a reasonable claim under the Inheritance Act.

You don't need to use the same solicitor to help you administer the estate after your relative has died. You can choose your own one. If the Will is going to cause arguments they will deal with those on your behalf. If after the death you see the Will and decide that it's really too much to take on you can renounce your executorship. Don't worry.

Banks will let you release money from bank accounts to pay for funeral costs, even though the rest of the estate will be tied up until probate is obtained. Same for any inheritance tax. You don't need to use his solicitor, find one convenient and that you trust (or use an alternative practitioner such as a probate licensed accountant) and that is reasonable, or do it yourself if the estate is simple. Being an executor carries some considerable responsibility so seek advice if you need it. You don't need an executors account but it is advised, and a solicitor will be able to operate one for you. The bereavement teams at banks are generally very helpful . Get several certified copies of the death certificates as you will need to send them off. Yes it is your responsibility to distribute the estate to beneficiaries in accordance with the terms of the will. Again a solicitor can do this for you if you ask them to (you can do it yourself).

I was my mum’s executor, along with my sister. It was all very straightforward but it was made a lot easier by knowing what was in her will beforehand and by knowing exactly what and where all her assets were (I’d been managing her finances for a while).

Some bits are amazingly easy - eg there is a website where you put in your relatives details after their death and it informs a whole load of organisations in one go. All the important legal bits are really clearly explained and there are people to help you. The only fiddly bit was that her bank account and savings providers all had different paperwork so you have to do them all individually and make sure you’re sending the right stuff. But again, it’s all very clear, just a bit administrative.

I was going to suggest looking at the age UK website too, it has a list on there of everything you need to do and the order to do it in.

You can hire a solicitor as the executor if you wish, although you don't have to.

My parents were executors on my aunties will and hired a solicitor. This was just over a month ago. They went through the list in age UK to make sure they did stuff in the right order.

I am executor on my parents will. My dad especially is very private about money. He has told me where all the documents are but I haven't looked at them. My auntie said the deeds to the house etc were in a certain place but they weren't. Didn't matter, land registry info could be used instead.

I would print off this list of stuff you will need to do though and go through it with the person who wrote the will so you can see its all there.

That’s a really good idea about printing off the list and going through it with him.
@LizB62A yes I think a PP was correct when he said that the will could cause problems, it was referring to the fact that significant changes had been made and presumably people had been removed from the previous copy of the will.
I’ve never heard of the Inheritance Act, I didn’t realise anyone was actually entitled to inherit anything!
I bloody hope when the time comes that he’s left it all to a local charity that he has used!
If I need to contact the beneficiaries, I will need their addresses, I’ll have to speak to him as I would have no idea of the addresses of the people he is likely to have anything to.
They live abroad.
Such complicated family issues at play here.
Thanks for the recommendations about the age uk website however, as much as I look, I can’t find anything about the process after death
I’m not the best at paperwork and form filling, I think I will keep a solicitor on to make sure I don’t fuck anything up. It really is quite a complicated affair (relative is also going through a messy divorce at the same time, she wants her half and relative is adamant that she shouldn’t get a penny out of him. She also lives abroad 🥴).

Sorry, I forgot to say thank you to everyone who has taken the time to post. I really appreciate all your experiences and advice!

@TheChosenTwo
I don't know how useful this is, but a relative of mine in the US was advised to include people that they were cutting out of this version of the will, and leaving them a token amount, say $10, just to show that it wasn't an oversight but that they were deliberately removed from inheriting the bulk of the estate.
I'm also aware of another relative who left a letter with the will (also signed and witnessed) explaining why a certain relative had been cut out and wasn't to inherit anything.

And, re: addresses of the current beneficiaries, when I was executor of my mum's will it had been written to include every beneficiary including their address at the time the will was written so you shouldn't be starting from scratch when the time comes, you'll at least know where they lived in 2020

Some good advice on here.

We keep a document which we update every few months and printed off to leave with a copy of our will. Has everything in it from energy suppliers, life policies, investments etc. It is a one stop shop for someone to sort out our affairs.

Re the will. If it is contentious, or likely to be, I would sit down with them and without having all the Will details ask why so, and then you are prepared and it might me you can suggest something's which might mitigate it. One thing to avoid if possible is the grief after they have died and you end up dealing with all the grief and possibly a challenge to the will....a letter placed with it to explain may assist as well

Good luck

Thank you again for taking the time to share your experiences, it’s really so helpful.
I think there will only be 2 beneficiaries, the brother and a niece. These are the only 2 people left on their side of the family that he’s still in touch with and regularly sends them some money each month.
I believe the spouse has been cut out, the children and certainly 2 of the grandchildren.
Obviously I don’t know, but after glancing at an old version of the will there were about 10 names, most of which had been crossed out as the draft was due to be revised.
All quite complicated.
The idea of one document is a really good idea, I’ll suggest this and hopefully we can both sit down and write this together. I just don’t want loads of additional stress when the time comes to put everything into action, I have a busy life myself (yeah I know, doesn’t everyone! I’m not claiming to be uniquely busy ) and because I don’t live particularly locally to them it just adds an extra level of ‘problems’ for want of a better word I suppose.

If he is in the process of getting divorced and his wishes are changing I would strongly recommend getting a new will drawn up with clear instructions on how he wants his estate distributed, contemplating the divorce. A scrappy will with hand-written amendments is fodder for solicitors who would charge big fees to interpret and resolve in accordance with the law, reducing the amount eventually paid out to the beneficiaries.

If he is still married in death then the will could easily be challenged if he doesn't make provision for his spouse ..assuming she needs it.

Assume as a solicitor has drawn it up then he will have been advised

won’t need the solicitor again.

There are lots of ways to be the executor.

One way is to register the death, organise the funeral and ask a solicitor to obtain probate and, in consultants in with you, to distribute the estate.

Another is to do it all yourself.

You can also do some yourself, and then use a solicitor to do specific parts, such as to sell the house.

You can also, when you actually see the will, decide to renounce the role of executor. It's fair enough to renounce if there are onerous or ridiculous conditions attached.

If you are the only family left and there is a will, it ought to be very simple. Wonder what the solicitor meant? No ideal to raise worries if they are not in a position to tell you any details.

Executing a will is an unselfish service you can provide to someone who won't be there to appreciate it. Don't underestimate the responsibility but equally it's a shame to have a solicitor write the letters to find out the value of the estate. That's just admin, easy to do yourself.

If I had one wish for the estates I have done, and am in line to do, it would be for there to be a simple list of all the valuables. Eg the sort code and account number of any bank accounts, contact details for any private pensions, share holdings, investments. It makes life so much easier to be working from a list rather than hunting down anything and worrying that you might have missed something.

All the best.

Yes, a new will has been drawn up with the solicitor in the last month, the scrappy amendments are what was made to the previous one so they knew the amendments needed to be included for the new one.
The solicitor hasn’t really made me worry, I know who will have issues about being cut out (if that’s what has happened, and I suspect it is) and I haven’t spoken to them in 15+ years and they also live abroad so not likely to have to deal with them.
As for anyone else cut out, that’s their issue, I’m only here to make sure the final wishes are carried out legally.
Yes I’m aware of being able to renounce my duties if they are too onerous or time consuming. I’m also more than happy to just delegate everything to the solicitor to deal with (presuming their fees come out of the estate and not from my own bank account!) if it’s going to be faffy.
We have a valuation of the estate already because of the divorce, I know how much there is in property and assets. I’m guessing this wouldn’t be likely to change drastically unless relative has significant life changes and needs to move out of his house, either into accommodation within a care setting (Very resistant to this idea) or with us (which we would both prefer if it comes to it).

What's useful is to have a list of all bank and savings accounts, bonds, ISAs, pensions, etc. You'll need this for filling in the HMRC online inheritance tax form and it's useful anyway for Probate.

At least half a dozen copies of the death certificate are useful.

If you can persuade the relative to consolidate any small amounts in for example building societies into one account that helps. It always seems to be the small amounts that cause more paperwork and sending things off! Filling in forms and sending off probate certificates for £12 in some building society is a pain.

And definitely a list of utilities, etc. And where to find things like DVLA registration, car insurance, house insurance, etc.