House in a divorce

[worriedandannoyed]

I was wondering if someone could give me a quick answer to this.

I've split up with my husband, we have two children under ten. He's moved out to his parents house but is still currently paying the same contribution towards household costs as before. I'm looking for another job to increase my income as I realise that sooner or later he will reduce what he's paying.

We won't be reconciling, so further down the line will need to divorce and settle finances. I want to stay in the house and if I get another job I'm happy I can pay the bills on my own.l with a reasonable amount of maintenance from him. But would the mortgage have to be transferred to my name only? I'd have to work full time to earn enough for a bank to lend me that much. Or am I entitled for him to keep his name on the mortgage until the youngest is 18? I assume not as he won't want any financial ties with me and I could default on the mortgage. Thanks

He will probably balance no claim on his pension for the equity - but make sure the pensions are valued first - that is your future as well!

His pensions might be worth much more than the equity - you need proper legal advice

You can agree what you want about mortgage etc. He could stay.on it but you pay, or you pay equally, or you take it over. All are possible.

He couldstay.onit but you pay, or you pay equally, or you take it over. All are possible.

Yes all possible, but if he is to get no equity I very much doubt he would or be ordered to continue paying.

OP could get spousal maIntenance depending on what he earns but these days would only be for a short limited defined time so if OP wants to keep the house she will need to prove she can pay the bills and mortgage for it on her own.

As has been said she needs legal advice.

Thanks for the advice. I don't want spousal maintenance, i just want maintenance for the children

Why would you only expect him to pay the bare minimum maintenance (cms)? I expect a lot more from my ex. We didn't live a bare minimum life before, I have no intention of leading one after either.

Why would you only expect him to pay the bare minimum maintenance (cms)? I expect a lot more from my ex.

Expect what you like, but legally that is all they have to pay.

So what? Seriously ... why expect him to pay bare minimum. Loads of people pay more than bare minimum. Raise those expectations. Does he want his kids living a bare minimum lifestyle? It is unlikely to go to court, more likely to be mediation, which means it is a negotiated settlement. Going in with a mindset of bare minimum isn't going to get you far. Why should the kids lifestyles change? People in this country really have crappily low expectations of men.

Raise whatever expectations you like. The law is the law.

He may pay more. He may not. If he does he can change it at any time he likes. It doesn't alter the fact the OP will need to show she can pay the bills and mortgage.

Why should the kids lifestyles change?

Because unless he is a millionaire lifestyles will change. Paying out for two homes instead of one tends to do just that.

There are no laws about the maximum amount he can agree to pay.

There are no laws about the maximum amount he can agree to pay.

Never said there was. Voluntary agreed extra amounts above minimum can be altered down at any time.

HTH

This person's other half is expecting a very large inheritance imminently. Enough to buy a house outright apparently. Plus has good pensions. Why expect bare minimum?

This is the situation l was in. EH moved out but continued paying as before until thing's were settled.

I immediately applied for Tax Credits (unbeknown to him) so l could get some savings.

OP hasn't said what figures are actually involved. Big figure and outright house purchase can vary hugely.

As I said, expect what you like. The law is the reality.

Well, we can squabble over it all night I expect. We agree op needs good legal advice. If a couple can stay amicable, better still is to mediate from a point of high expectations for your kids/him continuing to provide. Just my opinion. We currently both pay towards the mortgage and household bills equally, plus a lot more than cm figures. Works for us. I encourage op to think beyond the bare minimum when agreeing child maintenance figures. Sure, he might not agree, but what negotiator starts with their bare minimum?

Henqs may well have more pension but that can't be accessed now so it doesn't quite equal house equity. As others say, see a solicitor and they should be able to tell you worse case scenario and you can work from there.

OP - I'm now divorced and own the family home solely. Children are 11 and 15yrs

ISdads
Why should the kids lifestyles change?

Because their situation has changed. Their parents no longer live together and are now funding two homes. In divorce, everyone's lifestyle changes, including the chikdren's and it is naive to think that life will drift on like nothing has happened.

1. Do you have a famly member such as aparent who could with you guarantee the mortgage? I took over ours as I earned much more than my husband and could afford to buy him out on our divorce. In practice he probably will want to buy another home, have somewhere the childen can stay when with him and bring a new wife into so will very much want to be taken off the mortgage so if you can solve tha issue that will help settle the finances.

1. if the house is bigger than reasonable needs it may have to be sold. If you only just fit into it and it is modest that would not apply. In our case eg we have a big house and had I not been able to afford to buy my ex out we could have been forced into a smaller one (even with 5 children).

1. His pension does not help him get a house now and he might die before he draws it so he may not choose to swap keeping pension for house equity. He might instead prefer you get some of his pension when he is 67 and he gets more of the house equity now.

1. Some people do get the house until the youngest child is 18 and then split the proceeds. It is worth your paying for an hour's meeting with a solicitor to discuss it all having sent them all relevant details on a brief summary first.

Thanks for all your replies. I realise I won't get anywhere until I see a solicitor, I'm just trying to brace myself for worst case scenario. Kids love this house and can walk to school, have friends along the road etc. Just sad they will have to lose it all, I suppose it's my job to make it seem fun and exciting for them.

Eh? If I was him I'd want half the cost of the house. Why on earth wouldn't he? Quite what HIS pension that he has worked for has to do with it I have no idea.

Quite what HIS pension that he has worked for has to do with it I have no idea.

It is an asset earned during the marriage and should be divided as with everything else. Why on earth wouldn't it?

Because pensions are taken into account @Gromance02! Very standard.

the reason I don't have my own big pension (I was the higher earner before we had children!) is because I had a long career break to being up HIS children and enable him to build up his career. And when I went back to work I went part time so still looked after the house/children/life admin on my own! Wow!!!

This thread has certainly not turned out like most of the legal ones. Just concentrate on the responses by lawyers about the law if I were you.