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Original poster

Private foster arrangements, looking after an unrelated child

30 replies

InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 21:17

Hi,

Just looking for some quick advice if possible please.

I'm currently looking after an unrelated child, the mother requested me and social workers did a quick scout round of my house and have allowed me to have the child..

Now the child's grandparent has been in touch and is saying they are going to get a court order and take the child. And that SS can't stop them, is the correct?
They do not want me to tell the social workers their plan.

I don't actually know where I stand.

OP posts:
Yourcupwillneverempty · 18/09/2018 21:43

Tell the social workers the plan for a start but no, they can't just get a court order for a child who is under the care of a local authority without telling the SW/ LA. But do tell the social worker what you know and let them deal with it from there.

Yourcupwillneverempty · 18/09/2018 21:45

Err, just read your thread title that clearly states private foster agreement, how silly of me, I apologise.

Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 21:46

Is the child under their care though, legally??
As the grandparent insists as nothing has been signed by me or the mother , they can do this.

I was asked to take the child or it was foster care, grandparent doesn't want the child in foster care.

OP posts:
LadyFuschia · 18/09/2018 22:00

I think it will depend slightly on what the views of the parent (s) with parental responsibility are: would they support the grandparents having the child? At the moment they have the legal power to decide.
However the grandparents can apply to the courts for a court order allowing the child to reside with them, they would be assessed by social workers for this and the social workers would make a recommendation based on the best interests of the child. This could be different to the wishes of the parents ie: child moved to live with grandparents.

You can also apply to the courts, and I would suggest you at least seek advice from social services and a lawyer as to what you should do. Currently you have no legal standing, but if you are all happy and coping well then it may be in your foster child’s interests for you to share parental responsibility for them with the parents via a court order.

If possible it would be good for the child to have the support of the adults in their life working together so you might want to consider how you approach the grandparents around such an emotive situation!

LadyFuschia · 18/09/2018 22:02

Grandparents currently have no legal rights as regards the child by the way.
The law is clear that the interests of the child come before what any adult wants or believes.

Evidencebased · 18/09/2018 22:02

Definitely involve the social worker- for your sake, and most importantly for the child.

Under private fostering, the parents still have PR,( parental responsibility) so what they say goes. Unless the SW is concerned, in which case they may intervene.

Grandparents have no PR., so have no say.
If they have previously had an ongoing relationship with the child, they can apply for contact.

They could theoretically apply to a court for residence, but unless PR has been removed from the parents ( ie the child is in the care of the local authoritiy ), the decision of the parents would prevail.

Evidencebased · 18/09/2018 22:08

I suggest you seek knowledgeable input:
www.privatefostering.org.uk/pfcarer
and
childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/private-fostering/

Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 22:13

Ok thanks.

It's all moving so fast, I only got asked to take the child yesterday afternoon, grandparent was informed today and they've phoned me twice today, latest to say this is their plan and asking I don't tell the
SW. (Who has been involved since birth)

All I'm totally aware of is that the mother isn't currently allowed to be alone with the child (suicide risk), hence why I have them.

OP posts:
Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 22:14

Oh and this is the first time I've been involved in anything like this, hence not having a clue about anything.

OP posts:
Noboozeforme · 18/09/2018 22:23

It's not actually a private fostering arrangement until you have had the child for 6 weeks.

Who asked you to have the child? Is the child already 'looked after' by the LA ? Did the social worker go to court to have the child removed from the mother ?

If there is an interim care order on the child the GP wouldn't be able to just go to court anyway and would need to follow the CS guidelines which would mean a family group conference and pitting themselves forward to care for the child.

Haworthia · 18/09/2018 22:26

I think it’s dodgy that the grandparent doesn’t want you to tell the SW. The SW will surely find out soon anyway? I also don’t think it would reflect well on you if you kept secrets from them either.

Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 22:33

Basically child is a baby.

Mother attempted suicide (or was going to, details hazy)

I got a call as a family friend to take the baby at the request of the mother instead of outside fostering.

Mother's social workers handed baby to me last night.

SW visited baby today and asked how long is take baby for.

Grandparent informed of mothers suicide attempt today, and has gone full on legal stuff and saying they're going to get a court order to take the baby and mother home with them and SS wouldn't be able to stop them.
And asking me not to tell SW.

OP posts:
Frazzled2207 · 18/09/2018 22:39

I know little about this but I think you definitely do need to tell the sw.

Noboozeforme · 18/09/2018 22:44

If there are no court orders from children's service on the baby then the mother can take the baby and go live with the grandparents - no need for them to go to court over it. However, if children's service think that would put the baby at risk then they would have to removed the child back from the mother (and grandparents) on a police protection order and then go for a interim care order.

Not really enough information to go on. Either way you need to speak to the social worker asap.

WickedLazy · 18/09/2018 22:44

Does the mum know the grandparents want the baby? Why didn't she leave baby with them in the first place? What age is the mum? Her being suicidal, giving baby to a friend and then not wanting sw to know what they have planned sounds well dodgy. Is this supposed to be a temporary arrangement or permanent..?

WickedLazy · 18/09/2018 22:45
  • then them
Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 23:13

Mother (young 20) didn't tell her parent till today because they've not been very close till recently, contact is sporadic.

We've been the only constant in mums life since quite young. So she trusts us.

Temporary arrangement. In theory.

SS been very vague. Which is not helpful.

The cloak and dagger stuff is what concerns me, if it's all legit why not be up front about it??
Grandparent says they won't do anything that will get me into trouble, but......

OP posts:
Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 18/09/2018 23:15

Thank you everyone for your time and advice, it's much appreciated.

I've been well and truly thrown in at the deep end.

OP posts:
mostdays · 18/09/2018 23:16

grandparent was informed today and they've phoned me twice today, latest to say this is their plan and asking I don't tell the
SW. (Who has been involved since birth)

These people are not going to have that baby placed with them. That is not the sort of thing courts and services would see as positive.

Haworthia · 18/09/2018 23:19

The cloak and dagger stuff is what concerns me, if it's all legit why not be up front about it??

Exactly. I don’t understand why the grandparent isn’t being open and jumping through all the correct hoops. Makes you suspect they have something to hide. Do they suspect their daughter will object?

Anyway, it all sounds quite chaotic right now, so I think it’s crucial that you do everything by the book, and that includes talking to the SW about what the grandparent has been saying.

scammedohshit · 19/09/2018 14:09

My understanding is that if there is no court order in place the mother can agree to her baby being with her parents. In fact I believe parents can decide who their child is going to live with at all times unless the LA have a care order. I think it’s highly suspect that the baby’s GP’s are asking you not to say anything to the sw. I’d imagine they themselves have been involved with children’s services over the years too.
It sounds like yesterday was an emergency. It often happens that a child goes to stay with a family friend in an emergency. However it’s certainly not private fostering and will, more than likely, be a short term thing. Most people would agree that a young baby should be with its mother if at all possible with support

Racecardriver · 19/09/2018 14:12

Call the sw ASAP. They would have asked you not to tell if it was above board.

steppemum · 19/09/2018 17:15

tell SS, work with them, tell them the mother's wishes too.

The more you work with them the better it is.

If grandparents are serious, they will have to pursue it through the courts.

I would say though - if this may be a long term arrangement, would it not be better for the grandparents to be involved?
If there is a reason why not (abusive to the mother) then you need to get the mother to speak out as soon as possible.

I would expect a judge to find in favour of family unless evidence other wise.

It sounds to me as if they want to swipe the baby from the mum, and present her with a fait accompli.

Original poster
InvisibleToEveryone · 19/09/2018 20:59

UPDATE, ish!

Spoke to SW this morning, phoned her myself, and told her the situation.

A few back and forths, pleased I told her etc.

Anyway, they've been up to the GP home to speak them in person and check out the home situation.

Latest is that the plan is for the GP to take baby possibley tomorrow evening if everything comes back ok.
Then not they want of do the court stuff that will between them and SS etc. And not me in the middle.

OP posts:
scammedohshit · 20/09/2018 07:16

Really happy to hear this OP. Hopefully the baby will have the best opportunity to continue to bond with it’s mother in this scenario.