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Legal matters

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Original poster

Two court orders are clashing- how to resolve?

47 replies

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 07:45

My DD has a contact order to see her father every Saturday morning.... however her father has had another contact order drawn up for his other son he had with someone else with the same times and days. One contact is supervised. One is not. Father will not agree to drawing up a different contact schedule for either child so the clash will always be there. What can I do?!

OP posts:

StealthPolarBear · 05/08/2018 07:47

Why is this your problem to solve? What does your ex suggest?

Orchidflower1 · 05/08/2018 07:48

Do they not end up both being supervised so it covers the supervision? Would concern me why one is deemed supervised and the other not- it’s the same man!

MrsBertBibby · 05/08/2018 07:48

Does he plan to take your daughter to the supervised contact? Is your daughter happy with that?

Why the supervision?

TeachesOfPeaches · 05/08/2018 07:53

Surely this is for him to sort out? The supervised care is for one child and they won't just supervise another child not specified on the order.

Cupoteap · 05/08/2018 07:55

Wasn't this discussed at court?

Mumteedum · 05/08/2018 07:57

Surely this shouldn't happen? The court should have been made aware of a conflicting order? I would check with solicitor

Original poster

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 07:57

One is supervised because child has severe special needs. He is 6. My DD is 2. She's not seen him in 6 months. The clash has resulted in father seeing his son but not my DD. Then he tells me I'm obstructing my not changing the time. But he wants afternoon when my DD naps and he doesn't get that she won't separate from me when she's tired/ just woken up. Plus my order was made first. He shouldn't have made the second order at the same time as mine.

OP posts:

Original poster

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 07:59

No. My order was made first, then he made the second order with the other mum. I wasn't there.

OP posts:

AlonsoTigerHeart · 05/08/2018 08:02

Meh, don’t engage, he would go back to court if he’s that bothered

OddBoots · 05/08/2018 08:04

He needs to apply back to the court to change one of the orders, he doesn't seem in a hurry to do that.

Original poster

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 08:06

I've been trying to get him to work on an alternative set of times and dates for my DD but he won't. Not sure what the court will make of this? He is saying I'm stopping contact but I genuinely have tried to resolve it

OP posts:

AlonsoTigerHeart · 05/08/2018 08:09

Your not stopping it.
His daughter is available every sat morning as per the court order. He is just not picking her up. He is breaking the order

abbsisspartacus · 05/08/2018 08:11

Just make sure she is avaliable every Saturday and don't engage with him

Starlight345 · 05/08/2018 08:17

If he hasn’t seen her in 6 months ensure you put in writing Dd is available on Saturday mornings as per contact order and then leave it.

The fact he has to have supervised access despite the sn’s most children aren’t supervised when with there parents suggests there is something more going on .

Disengage

endofthelinefinally · 05/08/2018 08:20

If he cared at all he would sort it out.
The truth is he doesnt care and has no interest in seeing his dd but it is convenient to blame you.

Original poster

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 08:28

He will definitely take this back to court.

OP posts:

AlonsoTigerHeart · 05/08/2018 08:29

Then wait wait and see what the court says. You've done nothing wrong

MrsBertBibby · 05/08/2018 08:32

Well he is prepared to change the time of his contact with your daughter, isn't he, but to a time you don't agree is suitable.

If It's been 6 months of no contact why are you so sure he will go to court? He doesn't seem in much of a hurry!

Is your daughter missing him?

OddBoots · 05/08/2018 08:39

Has he said that the only time the contact centre had space was Saturday mornings? Not that it matters, you are complying with your order, if he wants to change it he needs to ask the court.

Original poster

Jamielee444 · 05/08/2018 08:42

There is no set time on the other order. I don't think it's fair he gets to pick and choose and I don't think it's fair my DD should come second to his other son

OP posts:

Sugarhunnyicedtea · 05/08/2018 08:47

So he has offered an alternative time? But it's not a convenient one.

How do you know there is no time set on the other order? You said he has agreed two orders with the same times but then say there is no set time.

Not your problem to sort out, your daughter is available at the correct time

EdithWeston · 05/08/2018 08:48

Deal with it when he takes it back to court. Until the, just reply that itnis for him to sort out, and you are sticking to your court-ordered schedule until there is a new one. Add if necessary that you played no part in the subsequent one which he cannot honour without breaching yours.

It is possible he will see his DC separately, and the courts will decide which DC's time should move. So have a think about whatyou know about the additional needs of DD's step-brother and whether that puts genuine limits on what can be arranged for him. Then think about what changes you can best accommodate for DD (or at least dislike the least, or would find less intrusive to manage - you seem to have done some thinking on this already) in case it does fall to you to rearrange.

DC outgrow daytime naps, so that is not going to be an enduring issue, or a clinching argument in court.

RedHelenB · 05/08/2018 08:48

The same could be said if how his other son shouldn't cone second to your dd. Why not try Sat afternoons. NAPS drop off soon anyway.

Mumteedum · 05/08/2018 08:51

What are you saying then.? You want him to change the contact for his son? He can't see both children at same time so one contact order has to change. This should be done by him through court. You're right that your court order should have been considered when the second was raised. Someone has messed up.

Not keen on how you say he's putting his son over his daughter though. Both children have a right to a relationship with their dad.

Blankscreen · 05/08/2018 08:55

Sorry but I think you are being really difficult.

If he son has severe and special needs perhaps it was the contact centre availability that dictated the access arrangement.

Why can't you just rearrange to the afternoon? Move her nap slightly/shorten her nap. It more important that she sees and has a relationship with her dad.

Going back to court will take months and costs him loads of money when the likelihood is that they will change your order.

Or what about Sunday morning?
As I say I think you are being awkward just because you can.

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