can the father of my children stop me moving

[mickie2011uk]

can the father of my children stop me moving from coventry to brighton ???

I don't think it's odd that mickie wants to live with her sister...some people need support right there...it's company and help for them...especially lone parents.

Mickey you should be very careful that you are positive your sister won't suddenly ask you to leave....or that you won't get on with her. How old are your children?

Also train fares are expensive once a month....it's regular cash that you'll be commited to.

Your plans are very dependent on other peoples good will - which your ex could use in court to suggest you cannot provide a stable home - it would come across better if you could show a court that you are able to live independently....?

I can absolutely understand why she might want to live with someone, but these are my thoughts.
Does the sister own or rent?
If renting might there be landlord issues?
What if the sister also chucks her out?

OP - I think you should look into staying, because at least then you can try and provide some stability and continuity for your kids, they will see their father regularly, and you won't be so vulnerable to being thrown out by family members who change their minds or fall out with you.

i'm afraid i agree with notadisneymum. you do seem very dependant on other people, and there is no guarantee that you wont fall out with your sister or that your cousin wont suddenly decide that they dont want you staying one weekend a month. have you asked your cousin if this is even possible? is there a particular reason why you aren't choosing to live on your own with your dc? would 50/50 care between you and your ex be an option?

Do you work OP? If not, then how will you pay the train fares? You can get housing advice on this website england.shelter.org.uk/get_advice

Have a look and see...they're VERY helpful.

if i was 2 stay in coventry i would have 2 go in 2 a mothers and baby unit i've been trying 2 get house down since april 2010 !!!! its not that i dont want 2 b independent living by myself its because i have 2 !!!!!!! my sister does rent you cantrain fares ver cheap if you look in the right places no way is there gonna b 50/50 care between me and my x he can barely cope with his 4 year old I AM MORE THAN CAPABLE its not that i want 2 live with someone its that i want a fresh start not because i cant cope i dont plan always living with my sister i'm actually quiet offended that i ask advice on a legal matter now my capability as a mother is coming up for debate !!!!!!

this is the 1st time i have used this and dont think i will be using it again none of use asked me my plans for what i wanted 2 happend use all assumed and ive only been living with my mum for 8 weeks because my x kicked me and our children befor that i had been living independently since 16 so no actually i'm dependent on any 1 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

not*

If you were living independantly how could you be kicked out?

First and foremost you need to sort out your housing issues, look at the link on page 1 that someone posted.

If your ex did decide to go to court for custody you do realise that your lack of housing and somewhat erratic lifestyle would go against you?

If your ex tries to stop you from moving or tries to get residency then you are going to face these questions. The court will want to know why you don't want to live independently and how are you going to afford the transport and is contact once a month plus school holidays a reasonable substitute for every week.
On the face of it a man with a 2 bed flat with residency of one child may look like the more stable parent than a woman who is moving from a spare bedroom at her mothers to a spare bedroom her sisters and who is dependent on the goodwill of a cousin to facilitate contact.

It's only that you seem very vulnerable....I don't doubt that I would rather live wth my own sister than in some unit...but you would not really have been priority on the housing list whilst you were at your Mums....

By the sound of it, it might be a nicer option living in your sisters but because you sound pretty alone, people are just concerned.

i only live with my mum i'm not dependent on her and mylife style isnt erratic . he hasnt got residency on his 4 year old her mum just abanded her they have never been 2 court and i'm guessing being under the infulence of drugs known stop and domestic violence would go in his favour 2 !!!!

No-one has questioned your ability as a mother, only tried to suggest things that might be helpful.
It is a very valid point, that if your ex decides to try for custody, him having a permanent address and you living with a series of relatives will be taken into consideration by the courts.

The answer to your question is that yes, in theory he could stop you moving.I was on a thread only last week where the poster had a court order which prevented her taking her children out of the county.

Now if you and he can sort something without the courts becoming involved that you are both happy with then do it. I would check the price of train tickets first though.

i'm not going out of the country and already have checked the prices well 2 be honest i didnt ask any opinons on why i wanted to move or opinions about the situation i'm in i asked if he could stop me i didnt choose to get kicked out he did that not me and havent lived with a series of family i lived with my mum and planning 2 go and live with my sister intill i get a place of my OWN what am i suppose to do ive been on the council list here for over year and havent got the money for a bond at the moment my mums kicking me out i dont want 2 put my children in a mother baby unit shall i go and pitch tent up shell i !!!

Why don't you rent a house privately and het housing benefit ? You could live wherever you want to then.

Mickie, what people are trying to say is that the reasons for you wanting to move, and the nature of the situation, are all things that will affect the legal situation you are posting about.

It's not people judging you. It's people trying to give a nuanced answer. If you have some really solid reasons for moving, it's in the best interests of the children and it provides them with stability, he'll have less chance of stopping the move than if you're doing it on a whim and he can prove that it'll be bad for them.

You really need to stop shouting at us and listen to what we're saying, because this is what lawyers will tell you, and what courts will tell you, and we're free.

If you end up in court and a judge asks you the same questions, the absolute worst thing you could do would be to get sarcastic and shout at them as you've been doing here. I say this as a lawyer.

If your parents are kicking you out then you become a priority to be housed as you will be homeless.

Go to your local council and let them know. You may have to get a letter from your parents to prove that they don't want you living there. Also you may be put in temporary housing to start with like a B&B but having been there and survived it isn't that bad.

Also ring Shelter and get good solid advice.

If you can't handle the advice on this forum then good luck if it dies go to court.

You need to show you have the ability to provide a stable life for the children.

To be honest I wouldn't be telling my ex of plans the sane day I had decided to move.

I would also not be so dismissive of a mother and baby place.

Mickie - ok, to give you a straight answer - yes, legally he can try and stop you, and unless you change your response to people who try to help you, he may well succeed.

Not country. COUNTY.

Also you say you have been on the council waiting list for over a year yet he kicked you out of family home 8 wks ago. Have you told the council this? If your mum can't accomadate you any more then the council will, yes it may not be ideal at first but sometimes you have to look long term.