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What is the average amount of kids today

32 replies

MUM2BLESS · 08/07/2010 12:52

Hi

From what I can remember my dads mum had 13 children. (3 sets of twins), my mum had 7 of us, and I have 4.

People seem surprised at times when I say I have 4 children.

What reaction do you get when you mention the amount you have?

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TheButterflyEffect · 08/07/2010 12:53

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MUM2BLESS · 08/07/2010 13:08

Thanks

I remember when younger we use entertain ourselves, play in and outdoors.

There was not so much pressure on parents to get this gadget or that gadget or to keep up with the kids fashion.

Some times I have to say no to some of the things my kids are asking for.

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TheButterflyEffect · 08/07/2010 13:23

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Insanitybecomesme · 08/07/2010 23:26

I have 6 and with the youngest four being 4,2 and 5 months(twins).

I tend to find people tend to stare rather than ask anything if I am out with them all on my own.

Those that speak are normally more interested in whether the twins (one in blue and one in pink) are identical, or if they are good(must be lots of naughty ones out there somewhere).

I am well known locally for my brood especially by the local womens group, who do lots to raise money through table top sales etc at the local community hall, they always say how nice it is to see a big family(most of the ladies are 70 plus) and compliment the children on their behaviour.(they have never had the pleasure of seeing the chaos they can create).

MUM2BLESS · 12/07/2010 19:40

Thanks for that.

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sorky · 13/07/2010 14:02

No one ever says "four, how lovely"

It is always, without fail, 4?!?! (said in a rather loud, disbelieving voice)

kingfix · 13/07/2010 14:10

sorky "Four, how lovely!" I'd love four.
Most people round here seem to have three. Four or five not uncommon. Admiring gasps reserved for 6 or more.
One is just begun and Two is seen as a starter pack. (I have 2.)

sorky · 13/07/2010 14:15

If my pelvis would hold I'd have had 6....Dh might have taken some drugging convincing, but it didn't so 4 is the limit.

That and I would be like the old woman living in a shoe

kingfix · 13/07/2010 14:19

We hope to be like Mrs McCave, who had 23 sons and she named them all Dave.

MUM2BLESS · 14/07/2010 18:51

It was fun being in a large family when I was a child. I did not get a lot of things (Material stuff) but we were grateful.

Do most people settle for a small amount of childrnen due to finances?

Some may be could not have more kids due to medical reasons. Maybe some women went through the labour and was perhaps put off from going again.

Before I met my husband I wanted four children, four boys. I feel grateful that I was able to have boy, boy, girl and boy. I did however those a baby just before my daughter was born

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hollyfort · 14/07/2010 21:15

mum2bless,
lovely to hear that you wanted to have four boys because for some bizarre reason boys tend to get a bit of a knocking on forums for some unearthly reason, like where do some people get off, kids are kids full stop not just genders! Don't get me started!! Just out of curiosity why did you want four boys? I have one girl and 3 boys all of who are adorable, my eldest boy who is four and can really wreck my head at times told me the other day that i was his greatest girl!!

MUM2BLESS · 15/07/2010 12:40

An interesting questions.

Maybe it was because I had FIVE BROTHERS, four my full brothers, one my half brother. I also liked to see families with quite a few male members. I liked the ideas of the male members being tall.

I use to watch the Osmonds and the Jackson 5.

I think that may be the reason but not 100% sure what my other reasons could have been as it a long time ago.

My husband also wanted four children.

I was so thrilled when my daughter was born though.

Boys are so much more physical. My daughter is very flexible, as she can play with the boys one minute then the other minute play with her dolls. She can stand up for herself when she needs to.

She however flew through the baby stage very quickly. Very independant.

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CherryPie3 · 15/07/2010 19:08

Interesting thread - I have 3 children - the youngest is 2wks old tomorrow. I would love to have another but was thinking 4 might be a bit much?

Hmmm - I think I feel a thread coming on

MUM2BLESS · 16/07/2010 20:23

Four is not much different to three Cherrypie3.

You find that they can do things in pairs. My oldest two sometimes do things together, same with the youndest two.

My daughter sometimes feels left out as the boys do boy things sometimes.

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tummytickler · 16/07/2010 20:49

I agree with boys being fabby - I always thought it would be fantastic to have all boys, and know 2 families with 3 boys, and think it must be such fun!
I have 2 of each, and would love 2 more, but my eldest 2 are going through a 'phase' (I hope!) of being really horrible to each other and most people around them, and I worry maybe I am just crap at motherhood and i am actually wrecking their lives!
There is a lot of noise, lots of raised voices and shouting, but also lots of laughing - I need to mellow out!

I know a few large families, most people seem to have 3, a lot have 4 and I know 2 with 5.

BarbieLovesKen · 16/07/2010 20:50

Interesting thread!.

DD is starting school in September but had a day at the end of term to go in and meet her teacher and classmates - most mothers/ fathers I was speaking to appear to have around 4 which, for some reason, I was really suprised by because I always think people have less around here..

I have two but am definately not finished, we have agreed on 3, but I dont think you can really know how many you want until you have the number before, if that makes any sense? my cousin for instance, a real sweetheart but I must admit, a little bit of a princess, shes 31 and really looks after herself, daily afternoon nap, mother still cooks her dinner and does her washing.. anyway, I have to stiffle my giggles when she tells me she wants at least 4 children - maybe have one first and see how it goes etc..

That said, ideally I think Id love 4 or 5 but realistically, if we're lucky enough to have a third I may think theres not a hope in hell of another/ all we can cope with etc.. I dunno.

In answer to the finances question (sorry dont know who asked), yep, in our case anyway, this plays a huge factor in our family planning, we can afford 3 and give them the life we believe they deserve, I know that sounds materialistic but I mean college fees etc.. also think it would be selfish of us to go and have a huge brood and simply not be able to afford it, and constantly having the awful pressure of money worries..

God I've rambled... sorry.

CoinOperatedGirl · 16/07/2010 21:29

I have three and around here a lot seem to have three or less, I know one mum with 5 and another with 4 boys. In the playground though most seem to have 2 or 1.

I like having three, although could imagine having 4 if necessary (where are you period ). I think 5 would probably kill me though, even though I am one of 5 (girls). Having lots of siblings is good though, I had a happy childhood despite lack of money, my most abiding memories are of playing random games with siblings, despite being younger than the other 4 by 7 years.

MUM2BLESS · 17/07/2010 09:46

Having children does open your eyes to the amount you would eventually like to have.

I gave up work just before my second son was born. This MAY have been a factor in deciding to have more children. I did not have childcare to pay for, work to give up or take a break from.

We may not have had so many if I had returned to work??

I am not saying its always been easy. I have had tears aa well as laughter regarding my children.

I have a wonderful husband who I would not swap for another. He is a head chef and helps out with so many things within the home.

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BarbieLovesKen · 17/07/2010 12:58

Yeah, thats a good point MUM2BLESS, work definately a factor here anyway. Would definately try right now, but Im on maternity leave and I dont fancy returning and telling them Im pregnant, work is the only thing stopping us at the moment have said to DH so many times that family planning would be sooo much easier if I was a sahm.

TulipsInTheSunshine · 17/07/2010 13:06

Round here the average is 3/4.

Very few have just one and even less have two. I do know a few with five or six and i know of one family with seven.

We have 3... definitely enough for us, i couldn't cope with another pregnancy and we certainly couldn't afford another child

MUM2BLESS · 19/07/2010 21:15

Very interesting comments.

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Roomfor5 · 10/08/2010 18:11

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Maybee · 10/08/2010 23:27

Finances are a big factor for us. We've 3 boys I'd love another but childcare costs really pinch and we couldn't make ends meet on just one salary. We both have good steady jobs and live v simply but still have lean months at times.
The housework can be a killer too. Dh is v helpful but as both our families live v far away I sometimes feel the housework is relentless with 3 already.

I think people seem to be having more kids again.
If dh were willing I'd be v tempted to just go for another one but he's done he thinks.
I really should stop snooping on this topic as it makes me evn broodier :)

juuule · 11/08/2010 10:50

I sometimes get a surprised reaction when I say I have 9. Grin

hollyfort · 11/08/2010 20:45

juule,
fairplay to you!! how old are yours? How do you find it?