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If you have lots of kids do you ever feel done?????

42 replies

conniedescending · 08/01/2009 14:47

Have 4, want more!

Keep telling myself we are done and practically we are.....so why dont I 'feel' it.

DH says no more but I've not really tried to talk him into it yet

youngest is 14mths and eveyone said after 1st year the longing would get easier but it hasn't - it's got worse!!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
dsrplus8 · 08/01/2009 14:57

i dont feel finished and "done", but DH has been sniped , after 8 we just cant afford anymore. not sure if the snip has worked though .......will keep you posted

Clarissimo · 08/01/2009 15:01

yay and nay
common sense tells me no more- too big a risk of sn with ours, size of house, workload etc

in a perfect world i'd say sod it have at least one other but even if dh agredd (definite no!) it would be a bad idea overall

cikecaka · 08/01/2009 15:04

I have 4, 12,10,9 and 2 next month, would love to go again but have had tubes tied while having dd3 by c-section. Get disappointed every month that I am not pregnant. Will just have to enjoy what I have

ComeWhineWithMe · 08/01/2009 15:09

I felt done at 5 but had double contraception faliure and am now pg with no6 and starting to feel excited again .

ComeWhineWithMe · 08/01/2009 15:09

I felt done at 5 but had double contraception faliure and am now pg with no6 and starting to feel excited again .

ComeWhineWithMe · 08/01/2009 15:10

See I can't do anything just the once .

dsrplus8 · 08/01/2009 15:12

comedinewithe.....CONGRATULATIONS YOU LUCKY GIRL! you must keep usposted as to when the buba arrives!

Rubyrubyrubyknittedknickers · 08/01/2009 15:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dsrplus8 · 08/01/2009 17:01

ive got a secret plan---im gonna adopt a la angelina!, just need to convince dh first. now if i looked like angelina all id have to do is threaten kiss him with the fishlips and get my own way! lol sorted!

liahgen · 08/01/2009 17:03

nope.

have 5, want one more, dh says no.

dsrplus8 · 08/01/2009 17:09

liahgen, just sneak one in, after 5 you dont notice another one , especially a little one.trust me (i got 8)lol

liahgen · 08/01/2009 17:13

lol oh he'd notice. We were actively ttc up until few weeks recently and now he's changed his mind.

My anger and unhappiness is greatly documented on here. lol

sounds like a plan to me though.

8!! now that i take my hat off to.

catweazle · 08/01/2009 17:27

We have 5. Just after I had number 5 I was quite keen on having number 6. Now she is almost 2 and very hard work I can't see myself with another, so I think we are done.

Gorionine · 08/01/2009 17:34

I have 4 as well and cannot at the moment decide to never have any again... so maybe...

Mil had 11 a hard act to follow, but maybe a half way will do (5 or 6, I do not really want half babies)

dsrplus8 · 08/01/2009 17:46

11 , now thats eyewatering! positivly victorian darling! can i just clear up that my 8 kids -5 are birth and 3 are accquired along with the dh(step kid) but they are fab, so ive claimed them, mine i tell you, mine.....mine> liahgen, ahem> (spike him with viagra)lol

liahgen · 08/01/2009 18:21

viagra, now thats a thought.

conniedescending · 08/01/2009 19:42

ahhh

glad its not just me

congrats comewhine! Wish I could have a contraceptive failure...would take the decision away!

I keep hearing friends saying they are done and they never looked back - seemed to know they were. But then these are people with 2 kids....

At one point we were thinking 5-6 but money/ space yadda yadda yadda

gah - I just hate the whole indecision of it.

OP posts:
liahgen · 08/01/2009 19:53

that's the point isn't it?

they knew they were done, either 2 or 8, doesn't make any difference really. If you don't feel done then imo you're not.

mrsdisorganised · 08/01/2009 23:33

I thought I was 'done' when I had dc3 now we're ttc#5 remember saying to my mum after dc4 was born 'I could do this again'...think I have a few screws loose when does the broodiness stop when does 'that done' feeling start??? Who knows, sometimes I wish I had the answer

handmedownqueen · 09/01/2009 20:32

I have five and feel done, feel sad that ill never be pg or breastfeed again but thats more about getting old - am 40 this year than actually waniting another baby
plus demands of family increase as they get older and its already an enormous juggle.
i have also recently got the urge to have a career as well -have always worked but now want to progress, its nearly as strong a calling as to urge to have another baby used to be
money also comes into it, we could afford another but we have a nice lifestyle and it would just be a bit more of a push to maintain it if we had another
so yes you can feel done but still feel sad that you are done
saying that neither dh or me wanted to be sterilsed.....just in case...

liahgen · 10/01/2009 20:42

at just in case handmedown queen

KatB · 10/01/2009 23:52

I thought I was done after DC3, for about 3 years I was convinced I didn't want any more. Then she started school and I got broody again... am currently very impatiently ttc~4. Who knows when I'll be done? I hope aftyer this one as I don't want to physically have any more. My pregnancies are not the easiest and I may consider getting my tubes tied so I don't even feel tempted! I'm only 29 so worry in a few years I'll want another one.... ho hum..... maybe I'll adopt of foster or something!

disneystar · 16/01/2009 21:50

i have 7 and there all mine
im 42 this year and still not done....lol

cheapskatemum · 16/01/2009 23:58

I can honestly say that after DS4 we felt "done" in a way that I never felt after DS3. Even though DS4 wasn't planned, it was as though he was inevitable. We did up the ante on contraception after him, though. 4 was definitely enough for us. Still is (DS4 now 10 years old).

psychomum5 · 17/01/2009 00:14

I have five.......don;t feel 'done' altho DH has had the snip and I have the mirena coil (so def no babies).

that said.....the family feels complete even tho I don;t feel done IYGWIM.

maybe it is just that the broody feelings never leave properly when they are always in use?