How much practical help do you all get on a day to day basis?

[reindeermum]

This question is for mums of 4 or more. Do you have practical help? (eg cleaner/au pair/helpful grandparent etc)

I do it all myself and am quite proud of this. My MIL does offer to help now and again but I always politely decline because her "help" requires managing in itself as it is like having an extra big, dangerous child on top of my 4 little ones.

In term time I just about stay on top of things but to be honest in the school hols it is pretty impossible. On days when I am close to passing out with exhaustion I think maybe I should consider getting some help, but (and here is the insane thing) I sort of don't want to because it would be almost like admitting defeat, and that I can't cope. (In a strange way I suppose I feel that I chose to have 4 kids so I should be able to cope with them)

So what practical help do you all have, and how do you feel about it?

we hardly EVER tumble dry but we are lucky to have a laundry room

i agree boys have less 'stuff'

Laundry room

Our (not very large) kitchen is also a dining room and laundry room for us all. We only have one bathroom (and toilet) too!

I'd love to do an extension with a dining room, laundry room, bedroom and bathroom...

no outside help herewith 4 under 7 oh is v hands on and does school run a couple of days a week and in laws or my mum will watchem if im at docs or something like that

wow goin green with jealousy would love a laundry room

I am having my washing machine cupboard ripped out next month, to make space for a bigger kitchen, sometimes wonder if i'm doing the right thing cos everyone throws their shoes and we hang coats in there too.

How does everyone else organise coats and shoes when they come in?

we had a large walk in lobby type coat n shoe hole where vacum cleaner and other stuff lived,we then turned it into an office so hubby can work from home but now have a homeless dyson and a shoe cupboard from argos but i miss having somewhere to stick things out of the way.shoes take up so much room do others find this?

We do it all ourselves, we have no family living close by us. My DF works nights and I work days. Housework is done at the weekends and my ironing is done on a Saturday afternoon in front of my favourite programmes! It soon goes quickly.

I am a SAHM and dh is a dairy farmer, so works all hours! and then when he is home is completely knackered.
He is very good with the kids, but no practical help......I doubt he even knows where the hoover is kept!
My sister will help with childcare if I have an appt or aomething, but I tend to only leave the bigger ones with her, as she is not much use, and they can almost look after themselves lol
My Mum would help if I asked, but that would be like admitting defeat! she would make me grovel, and then tell anyone who would listen, how much I need her!

I would love a cleaner, but that is a luxury I cannot afford atm

Have found another cleaner!! It's a girl from the dc's school so i know her. She seemed really nice and i told her exactly what i wanted and that i wasn't happy with my old cleaner etc.

Will have to cross my fingers and hope for the best.

My mum used to offer to sit with dd's so i could clean/tidy but it never actually happened. Too busy looking fter my brothers dc's usually so i just don't ask now

My DH has however asked her to be here all day with the dd's next Thursday so we can have a day away for our 1st wedding anniversary. Told her i work far too much/hard and i need a break so i suspect she has been shamed into it.

I shall just enjoy my day and she can have my dc instead of my brothers for a change

Oh Cazbody my lovely gp's worked all their lives on a farm They were head dairy woman/dairy man and i know how hard they worked. Don't think they ever had a holiday together till they both retired.

Hi All, I have Seven children and struggle to keep on top. There are just too many toys in the house and its in desparate need of a good spring clean. Do people have a daily routine? Do you give your older ones chores to do? I feel like I was coping until we moved house funnily to a larger one but since my 7th (18 months) and my grandchild (5 months) who also lives with us arrived I dont feel organised at all. Ironing? Whats that I really need a routine say up at 6 bed at 10 I know my partner would love at least another one so help me to get more organised

I don't family near by to help out. I have a laundry room so I can hang things up to dry - but I've recently got a tumble dryer!! We have a walk in coats, bags etc cupboard & a shoe cupboard. What gets me is having to always be clearing up.......

My mum coped single handedly with 6 - I actually find it harder looking after less children than more.

i have 5 children and i dont have any practical help(dh is around but i do most stuff).i used to have a sure start community support worker who came for 2 hours a week to play with the lo's while i got on with stuff,but she was taken away,although sure start now pay for dd2 to go to nursery one morning a week,which allows me to do clean upstairs(we have a 3 storey house so by 'clean' i mean clean the bathroom,run around with the duster,throw away any toys i find on the floor and quickly hoover).

i dont have any family living nearby,they all live down south.

I have 4, and i am 33weeks pg, i dont have any help, my dh works 7-3, so is home most evenings, to help with bath and bedtimes. But i fell down the stairs 3 weeks ago and broke my ankle so i have relied on my mum alot over the easter holidays, in fact she was here today and cooked a lovely roast chicken dinner!

I normally do all my washing during the week and then saturday morning, we have a tidy up day, dd1 and dd2 (9yrs and 7yrs) put clothes away that have been folded, ds (4yrs) 'helps' by putting toys away.

I have loads of help! I have a live in help at the moment. It's fabulous but temporary! When we come back to the UK I will have no help - what a shock that will be!!!!

When I have live out help she does 4 hours a day during the week and that is a mixture of housework and childcare.
When I have an aupair it is more.
I have 6 young children and a large house so i couldn't do it on my own.

I have 3 Dc's and a fourth due in June, I have no help and dh sometimes works away. I also have 3 horses,2cats and 2 dog.

The key for me is being very organised and evryone in a routine (pets included) I have no help from family or friends nor would I expect it.

Have 4 young ones close together. They all help do little things eg load/ unload dishwasher, tidy bedrooms, put clothes away etc. Not quite the standards I would like but great for them to be so helpful and independent. Actually terrified they'll end up like dp whose mother spoilt him rotten! They go off and play really nicely so can do bits then. Not at all the chaos people assume when you tell them you have 4 kids.

Have 4 young ones close together. They all help do little things eg load/ unload dishwasher, tidy bedrooms, put clothes away etc. Not quite the standards I would like but great for them to be so helpful and independent. Actually terrified they'll end up like dp whose mother spoilt him rotten! They go off and play really nicely so can do bits then. Not at all the chaos people assume when you tell them you have 4 kids.

I have 4dcs and I work part time. We have an au-pair and she is a godsend.She plays with the kids while I do my(not-frequent-enough)cleaning blitzes.But the best thing is getting to spend time with each child on their own,which I do think they miss out on in a crowd.And of course dh is wonderful...

I've got four and no outside help, but my dds are 10 and 9 and very good at helping/tidying up when necessary. Ironing - the only things I iron are dh's work shirts (and he would happily do them himself, I just like to!) and the odd thing of mine or the kids; mostly we wear stuff that doesn't need ironing! Ds1 is 2.9 and good at tidying up after himself. I go out to playgroup with the dses every morning so they make mess there .
No dishwasher - I do seem to spend a lot of my day washing up!
Dh works 12-8 mostly so we schedule dentist appointments etc for first thing and he does his share. We share cooking between us.

This is an eye-opener. I was just going to ask whether I should get some help as I'm due with twins and have 2 ds's already 4.5 & 17 months. We have a cleaner 3 hrs a week, i work 3 days at present. My mum has the boys one day a week already whilst I work, and often helps out another day.
reindeermum, I don't think it's admitting defeat to ask for help rather than passing out with exhaustion. Although when people started suggesting I would need help once twins are born, I felt a little as you do. I suspect accepting help is a sign of strength rather than weakness!