Can't shake the broody feeling! Am I crazy for wanting a fourth?

[Jessb2019]

Hello!

So I'm a mum of 2 DDs (7 & 3) and 1 DS (5months)

After our second, I knew I was done. I felt it. I wasn't broody and just knew.
But 2 years later my coil failed and as soon as I found out I was pregnant I was over the moon.
I spent my entire pregnancy thinking that this will be our last and like with my first two I loved every second. Even the labour and birth.

DS was born in October and it's been perfect. I've felt more able and relaxed this time and have enjoyed every second. Then suddenly, since DS turned 3 months I have this overwhelming feeling of being incomplete. I'm broody. I watch my 3 littles and I know I am
Not done having babies and that are family isn't complete.

I was to my DH and he said he agrees we aren't "done" but we need to get a bigger house- either moving or extending ours. We currently have a 2 bed which we were meant to sell last year but it fell through. And our area of living is extortionate. So we are looking to start the process of moving again next year.

My question is, has anyone else felt like this? Like unexplainably happy and uncontrollably broody all at once. I've never had this before. not with my first or second. Both times I felt done.
Has anyone felt like this after 3?
This whole lockdown isn't helping as I've literally thrived being mummy in this. And it's made me reconnect and love it more than ever.

Was also wondering if anyone else has 4 children in a 3 bed home?

Hope this makes sense!

Xx

I think its too much but.. since you both want a fourth thats fine. If you have several years of fertility you could wait.
I think its very doable in a small property but you need to be ruthless with clutter and embrace less is more.

If you can deal with the space and won't be claiming any state support, you should go for it. Especially as you both feel the same.

I have four, hard word and financially draining when they were small but better now they are older. I got sterilised after number four but on occasions since then I've been really broody and probably would have had more had I been able to. However that feeling soon wore off lol. I guess what I'm saying is sometimes we don't get that " done" feeling and have to make a conscious decision to go against our feelings.

I have 4 too, 18-8 did have a lovely 4 bed but now in 3 bed temp accommodation which is too small stuff everywhere although using some of this time to declutter. If you can get a decent sized 3 bed, then I’d go for it. It’s hard work keeping up with them all at times. 4 very different personalities in one small space. Love it though and wouldn’t change my mad house for anyone

Just to say. I’ve been broody since number 2 arrived 4 months ago. I kept thinking it would pass but it’s looking like a longer term hormona issue...! (You can tell from the fact I’m reading the larger families board ) In your shoes I’d definitely wait, this lockdown won’t go on forever and once real life comes back and everyone is off at activities etc, it will likely seem very different. I’d also prefer a larger property, 4 kids plus you and partner in a 3 bed sounds very tight to me...

Thanks everyone.

We would probably be waiting around 18 months anyway. I definitely couldn't handle 2 under 2

Sorry not to answer your question, but how did your coil fail? Isn't it rare for cold to fail?

We had four in a three bed. It was hard. No we have five in a five bed which is much better

I think it’s a common hormone surge around this time. You may change your mind in 18 months.

We had 5 in a 2 bed, 3 in one room and the 2 youngest in with us, it was cosy The over whelming feeling of broodiness can sometimes never go away and you can end up with a mega family which again is great but personal choice. So my advice is if you give into it once you may give into it again, have a think about a true end number and train your brain to that

stairgates i cant imagine having my lot in a 2 bed! What was your age range?

@lookingformybrain they are assuming it fell out as it's never been found! I've met quite a few people who had the same experience!

@pollyputthepizzaon I never had it with my first two.
I know we want another 1 it's just working out timings now! Xx

Where theres a will theres a way op!

@stairgates
Ive just never felt broody before, it's so bizarre.
I know that we want another 1, and of curse that could change in a year but I don't think it will be.

How did it feel having a big family in a 3 bed?
This pandemic has put all moving plans on hold for the time being obviously and I'm worried we won't be able to move when this is over before the housing market etc so we are looking at potentially extending and would hopefully be able to extend to 3 double rooms instead of 1 double and 1 single room. Or 4 but smaller! Xx

@THATscurryfungebitch
How do you mean? X

If you both want a fourth, and you are thriving at parenting under lockdown (hats off to you, I hate it!) then why not.

I've got three under five, all planned, wanted and adored, but no way would I want any more!

I think you're right to wait though, 2 under 2 for me was harder than three under 5.

If I remember rightly the baby was 6 months and the eldest was 7 when we moved from the 2 bed to the 3 bed, and it felt like a palace!! We converted to a 6 bed and are expecting no12 :) So as I said sometimes the feeling may never go away But! Saying that a scary c/s is what finally put the broody to bed and the most recent pregnancy sneaked through and although Im now terrified of the idea little one is not unwelcome:) A large family is lovely and not as hard work as it may sound, I found 2 really hard and wouldnt go back there! The broody kicked in after no3 when I realised 'actually, this is ok!'

It doesn’t sound like you have enough space for 4 children even if you could move. 3 children in a two bed house is far from ideal already I’d say.

I only have one child in a small 3 bed and we already want to move as it feels cramped.

I think it’s potentially very unfair on your existing children who will have to share their space/ parents time with another baby.

I would think by posting this question on this board you aren't going to get much of a balance of answers.

@iris243
I was 1 of 4 and never felt any resentment or that my life was unfair due to lack of attention or time because of having more siblings.
We were also meant to be moving before our 3rd was born but the sale fell through last minute. Luckily our 2 bed isn't actually that small and we actually have plenty of space.
We would also be moving/extending before having another.

@stairgates wow no.12!!! I bet your house is crazy bug amazing all at once
Have you felt that any of your children have gone without equal attention/care? Not meant in a horrible way I mean it genuinely following on from the comment about more children being unfair on your others? Xx

I am very broody for a third, unfortunately we live in a 2 bed and we don't really have any chance of moving so probably stuck here.

12 children? Omfg!

Yes you are crazy.