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Original poster

3 kids - 1 bedroom???

37 replies

uhoh2020 · 28/02/2020 21:13

3 DS in 1 room (triple bunk) 13 10 5 how on earth do you get them settled and asleep at a reasonable time without the tormenting play fighting and general messing about?
Usually end up putting youngest in bed with me as hes the main instigator in the messing about but it cant go on poor DH is resigned to the sofa.
Their bedroom is mainly for sleeping they have their toys and games consoles etc downstairs.
Help every night is chaos

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CornishPasties · 28/02/2020 21:17

Honestly and i know it's not what you want to hear as there is obviously a reason they all share a room but i dont think its possible. They will natually distract each other and even with different bedtimes they will cause chaos. I think you need to try and find another soloution could you ahve a bed in your room for the 5 year old?

Quicknamechange2020 · 28/02/2020 21:19

I really don’t think you can have three kids (especially of such varying ages) sharing a room and expect it to be an easy bed time. Sorry!

Rootd · 28/02/2020 21:23

But surely they don't all have the same bedtime? I'd put the five year old to sleep first and then once he's asleep the other two can go to bed.

fruitpastille · 28/02/2020 21:23

I've only got a 5 and 10 year old sharing but the youngest goes first and is asleep first. Then the older one is quiet when it's their turn. Sometimes I might sit in the room to help settle one or both of them.

Original poster

uhoh2020 · 28/02/2020 21:24

Theres a toddler bed in the corner but he won't go in it. I could put him back in a thousand times but he wont stay in it.
We have 2 reception rooms but without a door way (archway) and it's a passage for the kitchen so cant be closed off. They use 1 as a playroom with the youngests toys and a tv and xbox so it's not like they only have 1 room to do anything in but its not possible to be closed off for any privacy for another bedroom

OP posts:

Khione · 28/02/2020 21:24

5 year old asleep before other 2 go to bed.

Certainly don't reward him by letting him sleep with you - and push his dad out of his bed.

If necessary let the older 2 sleep in your bed for a while, moving them when you go to bed.

Original poster

uhoh2020 · 28/02/2020 21:27

Forgot to mention 5yo will not go to sleep alone

OP posts:

Teacup34 · 28/02/2020 21:30

I had 3 in 1 room and if I put them to bed at the same time it was chaos!! I put the youngest to bed first then once they dropped off put the next one to bed and so on.

CornishPasties · 28/02/2020 21:33

They use 1 as a playroom with the youngests toys and a tv and xbox so it's not like they only have 1 room to do anything in

But the problem isn't them having space to play etc it's that having all 3 in one room is inevitably going to cause problems and its not fair on any of them and you husband if under the current arrangement they are not gettjng any sleep.

Would the 13 year old be ok with a bed in the reception room. Even without a door it would be better as he could then get some sleep?

PlaymobilPirate · 28/02/2020 21:33

Have they always shared or have you moved to somewhere with not enough space for them?

The 5 year old should be in bed way before the big ones?

user1493494961 · 28/02/2020 21:35

You need to work on settling your 5 year old.

MyDcAreMarvel · 28/02/2020 21:37

Do you have to walk through both reception rooms to get to the kitchen?

Kaykay066 · 28/02/2020 21:37

I’ve got a 14 year old, 9 and 8 year old in one room and it’s a flipping nightmare. 9 year old doesn’t do sleep due to additional needs it’s really difficult so I sympathise with you. Could you get smaller one to sleep whilst older sons sits up till their bedtimes try guided meditation audio books etc a good consistent routine for younger ones is important but my 14 year old does cause havoc at times winding youngest up as he doesn’t sleep frustration I think it’s difficult

Bringringbring12 · 28/02/2020 21:38

2 bedroom with 5 people, of which almost small adult size presumably - is there no chance of bigger property?

Rootd · 28/02/2020 21:41

You need to sort out the five year old. Of course the older two won't settle - they aren't tired! Hold firm. He's 5!

stoplickingthetelly · 28/02/2020 21:55

Different bedtimes are the only solution I can think of. 5 year old goes to bed much earlier than the others so is asleep by the time the 10 year goes up.

Original poster

uhoh2020 · 28/02/2020 22:03

@MyDcAreMarvel yes have to walk through both to get to kitchen.

@Bringringbring12 unfortunately no no chance of a another property.

@cornishPasties eldest ds has said he would be quite happy to sleep down there just not sure I'm happy with him being downstairs alone.

The issue is definitely settling the youngest hes been very spoilt by everyone (baby of the family) and we have allowed him to have his own way too much, anything for an easy life, which Is now biting us all in the bum!
Older 2 do settle easy enough, even if not asleep they are quiet and in bed for 9ish and asleep for 10. I never tell them when or they have to go to bed its just something they naturally do. Youngest ds fights to the death to go to sleep and is often later than the older 2. He wants to be touching someone/ near someone to go to sleep and yes I do realise I have caused all this!

OP posts:

LouLouLoo · 28/02/2020 22:07

Agree with other posters, the 5 year old needs to go to bed first. Other two stay in playroom until he’s asleep.

It sounds as though he’s using bedtime as an extension of playtime. If the others aren’t there it can’t happen.

If he struggles to sleep on his own then maybe sit with him whilst he falls asleep but don’t interact with him.

CornishPasties · 28/02/2020 22:08

eldest ds has said he would be quite happy to sleep down there just not sure I'm happy with him being downstairs alone.

Id be inclined to put the eldest 2 downstairs if they are sensible. Maube get a movable screen to partly give the room some privacy. The 5 year old will be much less likely to create havok without an audience and it will be easier to deal with him in a room by himself without disturbing the eldest 2. Maybe he will even learn that to share with his brothers he has to first be sensible about bedtimes.

Original poster

uhoh2020 · 28/02/2020 22:26

Most nights its DH downstairs, youngest in with me and the 2 oldest in the bedroom, they share fine for the most part.
Anyhow I've put the euromillions on so I can win enough to buy a huge house with a bedroom each or send them all to boarding school and I'll be off to the Maldives

OP posts:

thesnackbitch · 28/02/2020 22:28

Could you perhaps put your youngest to sleep in your bed and then move him to his bed or the toddler bed when you and your husband go to bed?

veryphishy · 28/02/2020 22:40

Could you give your children both bedrooms and you and your husband sleep downstairs? That way if you're up later you won't be disturbing the children in the next room. You could get a really good quality sofa bed or put your bed down there?

Not ideal but better than the current situation. Then you can work on sorting the little one's sleep.

Letthemysterybe · 28/02/2020 22:41

There is no other solution than the hard work of trying to ‘super nanny’ style train your youngest and get him to sleep in a toddler bed in your room.

Quailpoop · 31/03/2020 23:21

No idea if you are still reading this thread. I have a 10,8 &4 yr old using a triple bunk bed. They all have the same bed time. I lie next to my 4yo till he sleeps and make sure no one utters a sound, it takes between 10-30 mins a night. In the morning the 10yr old usually wakes up an hour or two before the others and just watches tv in the living room until they wake up.

THATscurryfungeBITCH · 04/04/2020 08:54

I would split them up. 5 and 13 is a huge gap. Use your playroom as another bedroom

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