is 3 almost always a mistake?

[sulalovesbing]

Crap title sorry.

I know 3 families whose third child was a surprise. I know of one who had 2 girls and wanted to try for a boy. Someone also asked me, not the first time either, whether I'd try for a third to get a boy.

I figure that if people want a large family they would opt for four kids rather than an odd number?

Thoughts?

I have always wanted 3, because when I was growing up the families with 3 seemed the coolest and the happiest - whereas those with 2 were all a bit 'nuclear family'. We considered trying for no.4, but then that seemed a huge family and we can fit 3 in a normal family car. I suppose it just depends on your experiences, but 3 is perfect to us.

I have three. All planned.

I never wanted any more and most certainly do take exception to my third being referred to as a mistake. Your title question is very offensive and you should get it changed.

Why would I just want an even number of children? Bizarre. There are no rules there and no rights or wrongs.

We have five-not three but still an odd number. I'm always amused when people say not to have an odd number-it's fine! Children play in groups of odd numbers all the time, siblings are no different. The biggest problem we face is rides at them parks because someone always sits alone but that's hardly a deal breaker!

yeah the odd number thing always makes me laugh too. I was one of four and we all played, sometimes with one or 2 siblings, sometimes with all, sometimes with none. My three are the same. The oldest plays video games with the middle one, and plays on the trampoline with the youngest one etc. I found it made a closer family having 3 or 4 and also found having 2 a bit sterile and "nuclear family" as someone else said. I have friends with one girl and one boy who each retreat to their colour coded bedrooms and seem to have very little interaction. Quiet and peaceful but not what I thought of as family life (possibly becasue we are both one of four).

Every one I know with 5, 4, 3 or indeed 2 children planned it that way. I can't think of anyone that describes any of their kids as a mistake or an accident. i do know 2 families who ended up with 5 instead of 4 with surprise twins at the end but they don't describe that as a mistake either as they were trying for a 4th.

My third child is the best thing that could have happened to our family of 4 (my girls being 16 and 8 when he was born). I could go on for ages about how lovely he is, as could my other two children. He was far from a mistake. We very often say how lucky we were. He was however, unplanned.

5 pregnancies to get our 3 children. All planned. Well obviously losing two during pregnancy was not planned but what i'm saying is that we planned to have three and it took a while to get there but we were wuire determined. Three feels right. I have met many many more people who's first was unplanned. Actually i was an eldest unplanned myself and i have two younger (planned) siblings.

We had planned on having 3, but just didn't plan falling pregnant for another year! People were actually quite rude to me - "oh it will be so hard, you must be mad etc" I already had a boy and a girl so they just couldn't figure out why I wanted another!

I don't take offense to this post but I do find it curious. In my experience of people that I know, all 3rd children were unplanned. I just wonder how that happens. My husband and I are so anal about contraception and I know exactly where I am in my cycle so we don't get pregnant, but it's just interesting to me that people get relaxed and either don't use contraception after their second or don't use their contraception properly. Then they have a surprise pregnancy. Again, this is not supposed to be offensive, but I think somewhere inside people are open to having a third so they are not diligent about contraception, and then oops. I may be way off though, what do I know.

I have 3 kids - they were all planned