BFP after IVF - the journey continues (part 2)

[HopefulllHolly]

SENSITIVE CONTENT

Continuation of previous thread for anyone with a BFP following IVF to support with anxieties and other worries that come along with pregnancy after infertility.

@AnnieStar12
@DippyDuck19
@DogMummy87
@Edf
@Fluffyted
@Leaf86
@LouP87
@Natty2
@SETTC87
@ThePeachGoose
@jas1996
@lemonyfox
@oliviagrace2307
@summerchild92

Please tag anyone else I’ve missed accidentally!

Great to see everyone getting on in their pregnancy journey , exciting times!

I just wanted to ask if any of you have experienced lower back pain (not yet related to weight as I am only 17 weeks). I had back pain basically on and off since transfer day but not to the intensity of today. I took 2 paracetamols and it did absolutely nothing. I called the midwife triage and the midwife said that ‘pregnancy wasn’t completely pain free’ which made me want to laugh. I just replied this isnt my first child so she checked with someone and said I could come in for checks and to see the doctor but it may just be growing pains, i haven’t gone in yet but the pain has pretty much been there since 9 am this morning!

I also have dull pain in my lower abdomen which goes up and down in intensity. Very strange. Anyone experienced anything similar?

Hi @Faith2024 Oh bless you - that sounds painful! I haven’t experienced the back pain (until recently which is because of weight now) but I have had the stomach pain, or similar sounding. I guess it could well be ligaments stretching for both? Annoying the midwife wasn’t at all helpful for you, I wonder if maybe a physio could help? Have you tried having a warm bath or any heat pads? Both help my back and stomach pains so might be worth a try! Hope you’re ok and thanks for the well wishes 😊

Thanks @HopefulllHolly . I was under the impression that hot pad on back was bad but now that i have tried it it has helped a lot.

@HopefulllHolly my week off has gone quite quickly. Don't want to go back to work next week. But I will just keep telling myself - not long left. Fingers crossed it will fly by.

@Leaf86 sounds like you've been productive! What double buggy did you go for?

@Faith2024 glad the pain is better with the heat pad. I get sciatica and find heat helps. I think heat is not good in the first trimester.

Started packing my hospital bag today. Baby's bag is all done. I still have some bits to get for mine. Also, Baby has had hiccups for the first time today! 🥰

Morning all, hope everyone is well
Haven't been on much since our trip and then work has been manic since!

Update from me, had a little scare yesterday as I was in quite a lot of pain that was constant and went on for hours. Midwife's phone was off 🙄
But Mamas line was great. Got checked over straight away, although was worried they had to take tests to check I wasn't going into premature labour (just over 24 weeks). Fortunately not 😮‍💨 but made me realise that I really just need to start buying stuff and getting stuff sorted now - anything can happen!
Waiting to find out if there's any infections as they did find traces of blood 😕

Pelvic pain has been better, but still waiting to see a physio. Booked onto a group virtual appointment in a couple of weeks.. not sure how that's going to help my specific issue!

Lots to catch up on here but hope everyone is ok. Sounds like everyone's nursery's are coming on well and can't believe most of you are in/ close to your 3rd trimester!

@DippyDuck19 hope you have better luck with your 4D scan today 🤞

@Natty2 Oh my gosh how scary!! Are you ok? Did they say what it was? Definitely maybe a shock to get you in to preparation mode! Glad baby is ok and fingers crossed for the results.
Annoying you haven’t seen a physio but at least the pain is a little better. Everyone kept telling me to get a strap for the bump as I keep getting really bad backache now - maybe it would work for pelvic pain too? I know some women wear them for pelvic girdle pain anyway. Did they give you a timeline for when you’d see someone in person?

Yeah a bit crazy I’m in 3rd trimester now, though tbh it doesn’t feel it. I don’t feel like bumps grown really in weeks, but certainly have more aches and pains. 30 weeks feels like quite a milestone and that’s quickly approaching. Thankfully nursery is basically done now aside from putting up bunting and pictures etc. but I’ll do them over the next few months. Not like she will be sleeping in there anyway for a while 🤣 Really pleased with how it’s turned out so far and definitely worth the hours spent on painting, but my god I am glad it’s done!! All the furniture is up and my house is back to normality which makes me happy after living in a bomb site for a while. 😂 Feels very real with the cot up and clothes in the drawers (not washed yet as I still need to buy a lot now I’ve done a stocktake!)

Hope the 4D scan goes well today @DippyDuck19 and little man has gotten over his camera shyness! Crazy you’re already packing your hospital bag! Im not touching mine until Boxing Day 😃 I’d certainly hope to not come before full term at 37 weeks anyway - even though apparently my bump has dropped and she’s head down which I can definitely feel (so painful!).

Hope everyone is ok and has a good weekend. I’m very much looking forward to a nice dog walk today and some time relaxing with my other half this weekend and next week while I’m off. I hadn’t felt baby move at all whilst I’ve been so busy with work and the nursery so I’m soaking up her little kicks to let me know she’s ok. ☺️☺️

@Natty2 how worrying for you. Hope you're ok now?

@HopefulllHolly glad your house is back to some normality and nursery is almost done!

I have a burst of energy at the moment so trying to get as much as done now as I can.

Had the 4d scan today baby in similar position. Burrowing his head into my placenta so half his face missing and not able to get clear photos. At the start he did have his hands and feet covering his face too but we managed to get him to move those! Was amazing to see him yawning and moving his hands etc. He's also got his daddy's squishy nose!

@DippyDuck19 Oh that’s so annoying you couldn’t see him again! He must be super comfy in there. Will they give you another free try? At least you got to see a little of his face and nose, so sweet you could tell it’s his daddy’s nose.
Im still very much on the fence about having a 4D scan, part of me wants to and the other half doesn’t, and knowing my baby is tucked down very low quite consistently means I don’t think I’d see much anyway. I might give it to 30 weeks and then see what to do!

Hope everyone’s well.

@Natty2 oh sorry to her you had that scare, but glad things seem to be okay. How are you feeling now?

@Faith2024 I’ve had lower back pain and self referred to local nhs physio, who has been great, the exercises she gave me were largely what I’ve been doing in the pregnancy yoga classes. But I found it helpful anyways to go through my specific case and she’s following up with me too. I also did the group physio that the hospital organise for all pregnant women and that wasn’t helpful at all as it’s not specific to you and your needs.

@DippyDuck19 oh annoying about the 4D scan. But sounds like you had a little peak which must have been lovely.

Same as @HopefulllHolly I’ve been in two minds about doing a 4D scan, I keep getting sent £70 offered from window to the womb, which is very tempting! But while I’d love to see baby, the thing that puts me off is I’ve seen some 4D images that look quite scary and I don’t want to give myself anything new to worry about, ha!

On my side, the nursery is now finished, I’ve washed all the clothes and as I had a voucher for some nappies, I am even fully stocked with nappies already. All that’s left is building the next-to-me crib and getting a new mattress and buggy board, which I’ll probs do after Xmas along with hospital bag stuff. Even though things are prepared, I still don’t think it feels “real” yet! I can’t really get my head round approaching third trimester already. Can’t believe people in this group are already there!!

I had a little trip to the hospital the other day as I’d had a headache for three days so thought I should get checked as I’m higher risk for pre eclampsia. When I arrived the place was heaving, there were two women labouring in the waiting room as there weren’t any beds free on the labour ward! I was then seen by an awful midwife, she didn’t ask me a single question just checked my blood pressure, did the urine dip stick and put the Doppler on my belly for about 20 seconds. Then she said “you’re fine, you can go. Just drink lots of water” I was quite annoyed but didn’t say anything. I think the whole thing took about 3 minutes. I know they were busy, but it does annoy me when they are so dismissive. Taking a few more minutes to do a proper check of me and the baby, and asking about my symptoms, can be the difference between life and death when it comes to pregnancy. They’re suppose to check baby’s heart for a full minute, not a few seconds! It’s especially frustrating for me as it was that same maternity unit who made such a huge error in my last pregnancy and almost lost my baby because of it. And that all started when the maternity unit didn’t properly check baby’s heartbeat. They did a full investigation and sent me letter saying lessons would be learnt. So going back three years later, it’s frustrating to think they are still not always checking women and their babies properly.

Sorry for the rant! Luckily I’ve been feeling fine since and headache has totally gone.

Hey @AnnieStar12 I was hoping you were ok, sounds like you’ve been very busy and not on here much, which is only a good thing! Sorry to hear about your headaches, they are truly horrible and really do make you worry. That’s pretty rubbish treatment by your hospital, I’d expect much better. Is the hospital your only option or could it be worth considering other options? Glad to hear your headache has gone now. I tend to have them once every 2 weeks and the last one was particularly bad where I lost my eyesight for almost a day. Keep having the checks and nothing is wrong, but I have been really worried their checks aren’t comprehensive enough, so I can’t imagine how you must feel with a higher risk of preeclampsia. I hope that it was just a one off for you.
Sounds like your are massively ahead with organising your baby stuff now!! Well done you. I have got the nursery bits assembled and put clothes in drawers etc but I won’t wash them yet as I still need to buy a fair amount of newborn stuff I think. Plus I’ll have 3 months to wash it anyway haha, so may as well leave myself something to do!

I know what you mean about third trimester. To be honest it feels like a bit of blur. I felt like the first trimester dragged but now looking back it feels like the whole pregnancy has gone by very very fast. I’d quite like it to slow down now so I can soak up the nice parts like the kicks and growing bump, and spending time with my other half before our lives change. Somehow it doesn’t feel like that will happen though - with 2 antenatal classes a week, Pilates and work the time is just flying by! It does feel like a dream to be honest, very much agree it doesn’t feel real - I just feel like I’m acting out someone else’s life atm!

Really glad you’re doing well ☺️ I shall be having to make a new thread soon, wonder if it will be the final one before all our babies?! That’s a funny thought!

@HopefulllHolly they didn't offer another scan as they did manage to get some good pictures for me and some videos of the scan too.
My placenta looks really thick and comfy so must make a good pillow as he's in the same position as the first scan on Monday. He probably hasn't moved much!

@AnnieStar12 sorry you had such a bad experience at the hospital the other day. Hope you and baby are doing ok now.

I was at maternity triage this morning. Baby had significantly increased movements this morning. It was like his whole body was jumping and could feel his arms and legs jabbing me every 2-3 seconds for 30-45 mins constantly. He's had hiccups before a couple of times and this felt very different to that. Not his usual movements at all. He then went really quiet and had increased pressure really low down in my pelvis. I called triage for advice and they said they take increased movements as seriously as reduced movements so asked me to go in. Was monitored for at least half an hour on CTG. He seemed back to his usual movements. Heart beat ok. Midwife and doctor happy with how everything looked.

@AnnieStar12 sorry to hear that. It was proper monitoring of baby that saved my first baby’s life so it’s frustrating that it’s not taken seriously at some hospitals.

Thank you for sharing about the physio I will ask my midwife. The back pain is pretty much daily now so it would be good to look into ways of supporting my back before I hit 3rd trimester.

On the plus side I now officially beyond ‘scan’ stage. Baby has been moving since
last week, first I was unsure but now it’s most evenings when I am relaxed and have eaten.
So reassuring and around same time as first baby.

@DippyDuck19 Ah no - sorry to hear you’ve had a scare! Glad little boy is ok and just very busy in there. I’d have definitely been worried too - sounds like he was moving loads!! Sounds like maybe he just had a big position change and moved lower? Little girl has been very busy the last two days but I’ve also been resting a lot (week off this week now so I’m planning on taking it slowly). This morning she hasn’t stopped kicking me, some of them have been so strong I’ve physically flinched from it 🤣 They are definitely strong little things already!

@HopefulllHolly they definitely keep us on our toes. DP was saying he just wants him out now so we can stop worrying, I said I'm sure there's plenty more things we will worry about once he's here too! 🤣
They are definitely strong little things. Some of his kicks really hurt, especially under my ribs. This week though, I feel likes he's running out of room as his kicks are getting less strong where he's unable to fully stretch out and more like jabs and rolls.

Have you got any plans for your week off?

@DippyDuck19 Haha I bet our other halves think we are worrying over nothing - I guess it’s hard for them to understand our nervousness around everything. I feel like there’ll be even more to worry about when they are here - at least inside they are safe and tucked away from most things!
I was wondering when they’d stop having as much room - mine still feels like she has too much 😂😂 I’m being kicked on both sides of my tummy a lot. I saw a little video on Instagram of baby kicking over and over again on a scan - definitely what it feels like 🤣
I actually don’t have any plans beyond resting, a few little things I need to sort at home and lots of dog walks while it’s nice out (although when I walk it is quite painful, like she’s really low down? Do you get that too? I think I’m going to have to get a sexy strap tbh!). Had a lovely self care day today, got a pedicure and facial, have my RSV later today and then antenatal class tonight. So plan to just do nice slow things this week as I definitely overdid it the last couple of weeks 😅
Hope your first day back hasn’t been horrible! The countdown to finishing for you is well and truly on! ☺️

@HopefulllHolly I feel like up until 10 days ago (so around 28 weeks) he had loads of room. Am 30 weeks tomorrow and feeling very different. Bump is definitely filling outwards now and more at the top.
Bump definitely feels heavy when I walk like he's low down. I think this is why I get braxton hicks.

Sounds like a nice relaxing week off!!! Let me know how the RSV vaccine goes. I've heard some people feel quite rough afterwards. I have mine on the 16th (I'll be 32 weeks - they couldn't get me in any sooner).

First day back to work has been tiring. 19 working days to go though! 😂

@DippyDuck19 Oooh exciting! Hopefully the kicks will get less painful now then. I haven’t had any Braxton hicks at all - wouldn’t even know what to look for though! 😂
Fingers crossed I don’t feel rough - I have a touch of pregnancy rhinitis anyway so I don’t want more on top of that. Will keep you posted.
Oooh is that 19 days of actual work not including weekends or including weekends? I’ve worked out I have 30 working days left - which is stressful because I have a lot to do at work before then! But exciting because I am very ready to not have to think about it - they’ve not been getting my best recently, I just keep forgetting stuff and haven’t got my usual motivation at all. My maternity leave cover starts in a couple of weeks though so that will help me get my head down and tick off the big stuff I hope!

@DippyDuck19 Random question - how many short sleeved and long sleeved vests do you have in each size? I have no idea how many I need!

Lots to catch up on since I've looked on here! The maternity visits have definitely increased towards the third trimester and past it, yikes! Something to prepare myself for too I guess, but glad that everyone is ultimately doing well!

@LouP87 how interesting that you walked out of your JL appt decided to get the Cybex Balios - what did you like about it over the Silver cross? We have our JL nursery appt tomorrow and I mentioned to the consultant ahead of the appt that we’re interested in the Cybex e-priam but open to other suggestions too based on our neighbourhood and lifestyle.

@DippyDuck19 ah sorry to read that your cysts have grown and that they may interfere with your original plan. Yay for extra scans though and hope the c section win’t be necessary in the end if you don't necessarily want it. Such a shame that the first 4d scan didn’t work out as planned, it was such a sweet idea, but the bits you’ve seen in the second sound very lovely! Well done on already packing your hospital bag! Sorry to hear about your scare, but pleased that it was all fine in the end

@HopefulllHolly how is the nursery coming along? Do you have any photos for us? 😁 I can’t believe you’ve already started the antenatal classes! Time has surely flown since we’ve all joined this thread. Our NCT ones aren’t until Jan (due date is 28 Feb) and I cheekily signed up for the hospital’s virtual ones in Dec to avoid over-lapping, even though they said it’s for 32-36 weeks of pregnancy. Oh enjoy your week off and all the self care planned!

@Natty2 oh no sorry to hear about the scare! That sounds terrifying! Hope that the tests all come back okay. What is Mamas line? I've googled it and found this number 0300 013 2004 but now I'm wondering whether it's available to everyone, or just patients in certain areas. Their service sounds fantastic and would love to write this down and have it there just in case

@Faith2024 welcome to the group! Sorry to hear about the back and ab pain though. A physio should be able to help, but until you get there, maybe check out this page - https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/exercise/exercises-sciatica-problems/ the thumbnails show which area of pain the exercises should help with, and I've found the top one very useful for my lower back pain, even though I'm not sure mine is sciatica; it only seems to happen after I lie down on my mattress topper and try to get out of bed. I've had lower ab pain too after 12 weeks, and I remember that one episode around 12-13 weeks lasted for about 2 days, but at that particular time I just put it down to pulling a muscle during workout, I wasn't very stressed about it. I think that with the intensity of the back pain and the combo of front & back, it's good that you're asking around and trying to get some help. I wonder if it's PGP as that can affect both. Hope you find some relief!

@AnnieStar12 well done on finishing the nursery! What a terrible experience with the hospital, can’t believe it’s happened again in the same place. Will you report it again? Glad to hear that the headache has gone at least

@HopefulllHolly 19 days not including weekends. I've lost all motivation for work so hoping it flies by!

I don't think I have long sleeve vests. Going to stick with short sleeve.
So far I have about 10 in newborn/0-1m (probably won't get any more in this size as he probably won't be in them long, if at all).
0-3m I have about 5 so far. My baby shower is on Saturday so will see what I get then.
But I've been told to have around 15 of each size so you're not washing constantly. A friend said the most she had to change her baby's clothes was 5x in one day!

Since I’ve last posted, I managed to clear the future nursery of all furniture and actually bought a rug from Benuta last night as it was about 50% off, so can’t complain. Our JL nursery appt is tomorrow and I'm hoping to add some items onto the wishlist, that we can then follow for Black Friday discounts. But we’d be pretty happy with the JL wishlist discount too.

The kicks are definitely getting stronger and now I can feel the baby moving around (sometimes it feels like the a scraping sensation across my uterus when she moves position, especially if I'm lying down) or now she's kicking various organs around and I get some quick sharp pains depending on what she gets lol And I’m only 23 weeks yikes. I imagine I’ll only be feeling more of this as the pregnancy progresses. I also have this odd sensation at the top of my bump and right below my right breast, almost as if two organs are sticking together constantly or are being squashed together, it’s so bizarre lol I've had it for a couple of weeks now, but no pain, just an annoying sensation

It’s a busy month otherwise with nursery purchases hopefully, an obstetrician appt on the 12th, a midwife check up on the 18th and then we’re off on our baby moon! Hopefully the long-haul flight will be comfortable enough, but I've upgraded to business as I don't think I'd be able to do that flight at 27 weeks in economy, and I really didn't want to have to cancel this trip too! (first one was because of the haematoma sigh...)

For those who’ve already been through the 25 week midwife check-up, will they be running any tests on this occasion? What should I expect?

@DippyDuck19 😬😬 Ok I definitely need to stop buying vests then. I have about 14 long sleeved of both sizes and about 21 (lol 🫣) of short sleeved in both sizes. At least I can give them to a charity if needed! I need some more normal clothes as I don’t want to dress baby in only baby grows (and have loads of those too eeek). Haven’t got any vests from 3-6 months yet though - I will wait on those.

@ThePeachGoose How are you doing lovely? Hope you’ve been ok? How many weeks are you now?
Nursery is semi done - I need to put pictures and bunting up still so will send pictures then but here’s the cot area ☺️ Looks a bit gloomy as the weather is very grey today!

@ThePeachGoose Oooops messages overlapped!!

Haha yeah I bet you are feeling all sorts because everything is all squashed in there now - I find it weird hearing my stomach gurgle where my heart is 🤣

I bet you can’t wait for your holiday! I’m very jealous! And good you upgraded - I find it really hard sitting down even for 30 mins now, everything hurts! I hope you have an amazing time.

At my 25 week appointment they just asked about movements, didn’t do any tests besides the usual wee test and CO2 tests. I didn’t get measured or have bloods until the one at 28 weeks, so I don’t think you can expect much! They seem to alternate with one less detailed one and one more detailed one, at least in my area!

On antenatal classes - mine just have dates you do for month of due date. So my class has people mostly due in January but some very end of December and early Feb too. Same with the NHS ones. I should have finished them all by the start of December and then I can focus on practising my breathing etc 🤣🤣 There’s a lot of info! It’s been good meeting other parents to be though, everyone is very excited and sweet so far.

Hope the JL appointment goes well tomorrow! I enjoyed mine but we had a 90 minute and stood up the whole time and I was tired by the end of it 🤣🤣 Let us know what you end up with on your list!

@HopefulllHolly oh I love it! it's so elegant! and all of the toys and bunting will make it so fun. Very lovely. We finally have an empty room now so the fun can begin with buying all sorts of bits and bobs.

Hearing my stomach gurgle so high has definitely been another weird thing! It's just fascinating that we can continue to function with so many changes that are happening in our bodies

Oh gosh I know, I need to take my cushion around when I sit at my desk, on the dining chair or the sofa... all surfaces feel like cement to me, but I wonder if you mean that it's more than that at that stage. Oh well, at least I'll be able to lie down and have more room to move around in business. I'm determined to make this trip work! And bbhugme is coming with me! lol

Thanks for sharing more info about the 25 week check up. That's how the 16 weeks one felt too, more like an opportunity to ask questions really and run the wee and CO2 test, nothing special.

I'm pleased to hear everyone you've met through the antenatal classes has been so nice! These are the people you'll be having all of your future play dates in a few months, how crazy to think of that!

Ah I didn't even think about the JL appt being tiring, it definitely will be! I also expect to feel a bit overwhelmed as we haven't really looked into what else we need to get for Day 1 outside of the big things, and so far we're thinking of: Cybex e-Priam with their car seat, maybe a Stokke Yoyo later on after 6 months as I expect the Cybex might not be great for all of our use cases, the tutti bambini rocking bedside crib, the Stokke mini cot for downstairs and later we'll extend it into the cot bed in her room. Some of this will be covered by our families luckily. But that's as far as we got and we're keen to try out everything in person tomorrow.

@HopefulllHolly gorgeous nursery!!! I love that cot. Nearly ordered that one myself.
I think you probably have enough vests 😂 I'll probably dress in baby grows for the first few weeks. Have quite a few nice little outfits in 0-3 months.

@ThePeachGoose have fun at your JL appointment. Starts to feel very real once you start to make the big purchases!
As for the 25 week appointment, mine sounds similar to what @HopefulllHolly said. Not much apart from the usual checks.