Maxed out thread continued all things IVF/FET

[Bluemeadowbaby]

@2mumlife @Verbena87 @Leezo @Francesmalin I think we maxed out the last one as I can't reply!

@Leezo @Verbena87 how are you doing? X

As expected I tested negative a couple of days after and started bleeding yesterday so it's been another chemical pregnancy for me I'm afraid. I'm 1MC, 3MMC and 3Cp's down now. I'm heartbroken but as long as I still ovulate I still have a chance - this woman is not for giving up xx

I was successful in getting pregnant with round 2 fresh transfer in February , sadly though i had a tfmr at 18 weeks , 2 weeks ago.

already arranged a consultation with my consultant for first week of August hopefully to do a frozen transfer end of august/september. ( protocol will stay the same as consultant said it worked for me and the tfmr was unfortunately a bad luck thing)

until then will try naturally and pray for a miracle!!

@Leezo @Lemoncake5 I'm so sorry to hear of your sad news 😞 this journey really is so hard! Stand tall & strong ladies!! X

@Bluemeadowbaby it's so difficult but so many people are in the same boat. We have paid for another cycle using donated eggs so back on the waiting list for them. In the mean time we'll just keep going and if it happens naturally again, all and good. How are you doing?x

@Leezo it really is such a hard journey! I have a little boy who is 2 from my second round of ICSI - I have severe endometriosis and lost both my tubes so he really is a blessing. I had 2 FETs with my last embryos one in November which was a chemical and March BFN. I've taken a break for a bit as will need to start from fresh but just wanting to offer all of my support still as much as I can from a keyboard to you all 💕 x

Some days are better than others. Today my morning started off well until i received a phone call to tell me the post mortem was completed and baby returned to hospital so we can now resume with burial procedure. I have felt down all day and i thought about my poor baby being moved around and now theyve said we can do the burial in 2 weeks at the earliest making that almost 5 weeks after giving birth to him. Its really hard to explain but sometimes i become so overwhelmed with emotion. That feeling when you feel a lump in your throat. I go back to work on the 12th and i worry I might not get through it without breaking down.

@Lemoncake5 I cannot even begin to imagine the pain you are going through, I am truly lost for words reading your pain. Is your work offering support/continued support for you for when you return? Life really is so cruel and I truly am so sorry you're going through this. Sending you so much support 💕 x

Im a secondary school teacher. I submitted two sick notes. I was due back this coming Monday but extended it for another week. We break up on the 20th and i go back on the 12th. I dont know if il be able to do it. I wanted to go back for some form of normality and it will only be 7 work days. Im sure hr and the head teacher will want to see me on my return. I will be telling them that i will be resuming treatment in September.
I’ve had a million thoughts and feelings these past few weeks. I cant go back i can only look ahead but there is worry and fear for the future too. Ivf makes it ten times harder with consuming and taking all the medication.

I am so sorry for what you have gone through.
its just a rubbish situation and it feels so isolating unless someone has gone through something similar. Its strange i havent been doing much apart from feeling sad at home and staying on the sofa or bed most of the days yet it feels unreal how fast time has gone? 16 days gone… my dh has been incredible and he went back to work but each time he comes home i cry i dont know i feel terrible like its my fault? But its not i know its not. I look at my ds and think he deserves a sibling he would be an amazing big brother. I am practical in the sense that i need the next steps in place or dates or something to make me feel proactive. My transfer will most likely be end of august or start of september and im scared that it will be negative but theres something in me that says dont give up.

Just catching up on the new thread (thanks for starting!)

@Leezo I’m sorry you’ve not had a better outcome. Are you being seen by recurrent miscarriage clinic? That seems like an awful lot of early loses to have had to go through x

@Lemoncake5 Can’t imagine what you’ve been going through, it must have been devastating. Don’t feel under pressure to go back to work, just do whatever is right for you x

@Verbena87 How are you doing?

@2mumlife hey - yes I've been with the recurrent miscarriage clinic since loss number 3. Since then I've had another 2 natural conceptions and 2 conceptions using donated egg, frozen embryo transfers. No live births, never seem to get to 2nd trimester. We've seen a heartbeat twice but it's gone in a few weeks. I've had all the tests and have stumped my recurrent miscarriage specialist and my IVF clinic have no answers either. We've prepaid for another round of donated eggs with a new donor but we had to go back to the end of the waiting list again since our last chemical pregnancy was our last frozen embryo from our first batch. We'll keep rolling the dice naturally until we come off the waiting list and trying to stay positive but with 7 losses under our belt it gets tougher and tougher visualising success. X

Ah thanks @Bluemeadowbaby

@Lemoncake5 that’s heartbreaking, I’m so sorry. I’m secondary too and it’s hard work at the best of times - see how you go, pressure is off a bit now GCSEs are out the way so just go home if you need to I think.

@leezo sorry to hear about that.

@2mumlife have you recovered from covid? Thanks for asking. I’m royally fucked, basically. Been off work for a week and can’t get through the day without falling asleep - so so inhumanly weary. I think it’s knowing we can’t afford to go again but not really being able to accept it. It’s a bugger.

love to all x

I’ll be in for a total of 7 days until we break up. The day we finish is a whole school trip to a theme park. The day after we fly out to Turkey. I have my consultant review with my clinic on
4th August. Hoping we will see the hospital consultant before then with some results. I feel like dates and things in place really help to move foward. I just really hope the next one sticks and is a healthy baby.

@Verbena87 sorry to hear about your results. I have just seen from the old thread. How are you feeling? Hope it's a bit better.

@2mumlife have you recovered from COVID?

@Leezo just also read your message and I am really sorry you have been going through so much.did you do the egg donation here in the UK?

I am doing better, much better. I have been distracting myself with the sale of our flat and looking for a new house to buy. We have found a place and the offer has been accepted so now finger crossed everything proceeds properly. At the moment the anger about my situation is gone but I still feel in a limbo and still haven't accepted it at full. At least I don't cry every day anymore but both me and bf are still sad. We have been talking about egg donation but still don't feel it's a thing for me. If my genetic test comes back normal I think I will use my NHS cycle and give it a last go with my own eggs. You never know, right?

@Verbena87 I'm so sorry, I don't know what happened to the last thread but some how I completely missed the outcome of your testing 🤦🏻‍♀️ I'm so sorry it's not the answer you (and me and I'm sure us all for you!) were hoping for 😣 it really is so shit. I know we say it a lot, but I do hope you're taking some time for yourself and I really do hope you're okay. It's just the shittest feeling back to square one and not knowing what the future holds but know that you really are so bloody strong & I'm sending you a huge hug (and a massive glass of something strong!) x

@2mumlife I missed the covid part too!! Damn that last thread but I'm so glad to see you guys back on here so we can keep in touch. I completely understand the worry covid and the horror stories bring, I know I'd feel the same. How are you feeling now? Did you ever chat to the drs about omeprozol for the heartburn? X

@Francesmalin we're on the same path with the house/limbo!! It sounds like a hard decision to be making but whatever you choose to do will be the right one for you, I always say go with how you feel as soon as you wake up. Your first thoughts in the morning are rested thoughts, the day seems to make our thoughts far more complicated x

@Leezo I can't imagine how frustrating it must be that no one seems to have been able to give you any answers. Hopefully something will work out for you soon, you have been through so much

@Verbena87 I think getting to a point you / life circumstances have decided as an end point must be such a hard moment. Have you considered doing a counselling session with your clinic or anything like that? I imagine like many things time is needed now to experience all the emotions involved x

@Francesmalin You never know anything in this fertility lotto. I think you've just got to work through the journey making the decisions that feel right to you as you come to each juncture

@Bluemeadowbaby Never went to Drs but someone told me you can just buy the stuff in Superdrug over the counter, so going to look into that next time I'm in town :) Heartburn has definitely improved now covid has cleared.

I seem to be over covid now (hurrah!) though I still think overall energy levels have suffered.

@2mumlife glad you’re recovered. I’m already in counselling with the clinic yep 👍🏼.

@Verbena87 Hope its useful in navigating this juncture x

How’s everyone doing? We had our wtf appointment today (basically bad luck again as everything looked grand) and have been referred back to the genetic counsellor to just discuss our choices now (trying naturally and accepting the risks or whatever). It’s 12 grand for another PGD cycle so that’s not happening anyway!

@2mumlife when’s your due date. Blatantly here for a baby update 😂.

@Verbena87 How are you feeling this morning about the wtf appointment? I guess you already know your choices and can have a think about things in the meantime. My due date should be the 8th September but NHS made it the 5th due to fetus measuring a bit longer at the 12 week scan. Either way, not too long to go! I don't want to jinx anything but I'm still surprisingly feeling pretty good - no swollen feet, only occasional stabs of pelvic pain, still sleeping pretty good. I'm a bit uncomfortable now at times, but nothing really compared to how a lot of women seem to feel by this point! Looking forward to having space for my lungs again in a few weeks, but I've not hit the "I'm fed up of this" point that seems to be common.

I’m doing ok. I think basically we risk passing on the genetic condition (with the complicating factor that we’ve consciously eliminated this risk for our firstborn, and how do you explain that to your kids?) or we don’t have any more. We categorically cannot afford another cycle and I can’t see a point where we’ll be there. Gutting really.

It’s great you’re feeling so well - really not long now! So exciting. Xx

@Verbena87 it's really frustrating when everything is looking grand, I totally get that. How are you feeling after the meeting Noel I'm doing okay, thanks for asking - finally! got a house I swear it's been almost a year now?! But it kinda opens the door to possibly trying one last time... I'm not sure how I feel about it tbh as on one hand I'm really happy but on the other hand the idea of another baby is starting to fire up inside me again it's just money...gamble...uncertainty maybe x

@2mumlife it's so nice to hear you're feeling nice, I can relate so much. I loved my pregnancy and miss the feeling of feeling so...content!...it's great to hear you're not at the fed up stage, it's strange but I think maybe when you've been what you've been through to get to where you are (not to take away from any pregnant lady at all!!) but maybe there's that deeper level of understanding and appreciating what your body is cooking up so it takes away any "fed up" feelings - that's the only way I can describe it as I remember it so well, uncomfortable yes but fed up no way 🥰 are you all ready for baby's arrival? X

Hello everyone! How are you doing? Sorry for the radio silence. I have been quite busy with the house sale/purchase and have been away a lot. Also I am trying to make space and be away from IVF and babies conversations as I am finding all of those quite triggering at the moment. I thought it would have been easier to decide if we wanted to be Childless or not but it's not! In the meantime we are trying to have a bit of fun and very excited about my next chapter in the new house!

Give your updates please 🙂

@Francesmalin hey!! Glad you've been taking some time out for yourself, have you found somewhere to purchase? My update is the same as you in regards to house sale and purchase 🥰 it's nice to focus some energy onto other parts of life isn't it x

@2mumlife I have been thinking of you...not long now for babas arrival! How are you feeling? I honestly cannot explain the surrealness (word?) when they're finally here, but really embrace this time now being the two of you if baba isn't already here - enjoy all the lay ins and just taking in those last sweet days 💕 wishing you all the luck x