Any stories please feeling utterly lost

[whataglouriousthingtobe]

Had my ivf clinic scan today, by transfer dates I'd be 7 weeks today. I went to epu last Thursday for pains and they scanned me and dated me at 5+5, today I measured 6+5 so that adds up. But no fetal pole was seen today and I was told by the nurse she'd expect to see one by now, she wouldn't tell me what's going to happen but that 9/10 she would see a fetal pole by now. Am I going to miscarry? I'm absolutely devastated I can't believe this has happened. I'm going to be referred to the hospital so yet more waiting. Does anyone know what might happen now ? Is it just more scans ?

I should add I've been referred to the hospital now for another scan so will know for sure on Monday

Just giving this a bump

If your dates are accurate due to ivf , you would expect to see a heartbeat during week 6 via transvaginal scan. I didn’t have a heartbeat at 6 weeks 5 and it didn’t grow properly after that , was a mmc.
I just wanted to be honest and feel it’s best to prepare. Hopefully, someone on here may come on with a success story. I read a lot of threads which gave me false hope because the ladies either weren’t sure of dates or had abdominal scans.
Do you know your hcg level? I think if it’s above a certain amount they expect to see certain things. Like above 10,000 a heartbeat.
I know how distressing this can be, it’s a waiting game to see if anything has changed at next scan 💐

@Loveintherain no they did my bloods today and will give me the result tomorrow, they aren't going to check if it's doubling though as apparently along with the next scan that should be enough to confirm what's happening. I have also read these success stories and I think you're right, with ivf we can be certain give or take a couple of days. Just grasping at straws I guess. Thanks for replying to me

There’s always a chance but I just wanted to be honest based on my experience, it’s very hard x

@Loveintherain no I appreciate your honesty. It's always helpful to hear from someone who has been through the same. I just don't get how the gestational sac is in keeping with the dates the hospital put me as but no fetal pole. Why would the sac be growing but no pole...

I'm really sorry to read what's happening for you @whataglouriousthingtobe. I really hope that you get good news.

Unfortunately my only experience of something similar ended in a loss at 6 weeks - I'd had a scan due to bleeding. For me, there was a sac visible but no foetal pole, and it was clear from the scan that the sac was starting to break down so the pregnancy wasn't viable. It was diagnosed as an anembryonic pregnancy, where the sac starts to grow but (likely due to a chromosomal issue) the embryo never started to properly develop. Apparently when that occurs there's often still some growth of the sac due to hormones, but once the body realises there's no embryo developing the sac stops growing.

I really hope that it's different for you. At those early dates, everything is so small that the sonographer is trying to measure things in millimetres, through layers of tissue, so things can be missed. It's possible that by your next scan there'll have been enough growth to make a foetal pole visible. If the sac looked intact and regular, I wouldn't give up all hope just yet.

I'm sorry I don't have a more positive story for you. I'll be thinking of you.

@Scirocco thank you for sharing your story and I'm sorry you went through that.

I think with ivf they're pretty solid on dates and when a fetal pole should be visible by, so the fact it isn't there not even a heartbeat I know isn't good. I think everything looked fine but no baby inside. To be honest my symptoms did start to gradually tail off but I thought it was just fluctuating hormones...
I will come to terms with it I just wish we didn't have to keep having scans to 'confirm' things, I said yesterday I just want a straight answer and she said 9/10 they would see a fetal pole by now, so I know that was her being as honest as she could be.

We're lucky that we have another 7 embryos in the freezer but I just wanted this one to work 😢

Hi op, sorry it’s so hard. I found the constant scans when I knew the score really hard. It feels like they prolong everything and it feels unbearable. Don’t give up hope until Monday but it’s good to prepare yourself is all.
It’s fantastic you have so many embryos! Would you consider pgs testing ? This helps rule out any chromosome abnormal ones and might help avoid this recurring. I don’t know your age but you should have a good number of normals Early 30s. Keep strong

@Loveintherain thanks. We had 9 to start with so it's a good munber. I'm 31. Would love to do pgs but just can't afford it, we've already paid so much for the I've package then the drugs on top.
Yes it does feel like it's being prolonged and also carrying on the drugs I feel is masking the inevitable !

So I've heard off the clinic and my blood results for hcg level show that it's at 38928 does anyone know anything about the levels ?? They still wouldn't tell me what it means, apart from its above the range they'd expect to see at this level so why can't they see the baby still 😢

I'm really sorry. At that level of hCG they should almost certainly see a foetal pole in a viable pregnancy. It sounds like you could be having an anembryonic pregnancy, as the hCG levels do continue to rise for a bit even though there's no foetal pole development. Nobody can say for sure without the second scan, but if that is what's happening, I'm really sorry.

@Scirocco this thought is in my mind also. But why hasn't my body realised yet, I'll be 7 weeks tomorrow. Do you think the drugs I'm on are masking it hence my body not getting rid ??

I’m sorry to hear this. I went to 12 weeks with my first loss and wasn’t on any medication. Found out at 12 week scan. The baby had passed at 8 weeks something.
I had no bleeding nothing and ended up having the d&c operation 💐

Sometimes it can take weeks for our bodies to realise that a pregnancy isn't viable or that a baby has died - our bodies have evolved to protect and maintain pregnancies as much as possible. Medications such as progesterone can also mask a loss, but you should still take them until it's confirmed one way or the other, just in case you get good news... It's so hard.

@Loveintherain oh I'm sorry that's just awful.

@Scirocco I do think the drugs don't help!
Either way Monday I'll find out what's going on. If there is growth on the sac again I would say deffo blighted ovum. I'm slowly coming to terms with it, I was just abit thrown with the hcg results but I know they don't really mean nothing on their own.
It's so unfair, I tried not to get my hopes up when we got the postive result but you just can't help yourself. Why shouldn't we get excited ! Doesn't seem right somehow that we have to carry on worrying through each hurdle

I’m in third trimester and I’ve struggled to enjoy this pregnancy. I’ve worried every day. Im counting down the days until birth. It’s such a shame that the positivity and excitement is mostly replaced with anxiety.
When you have losses , it’s just so hard to feel the same as someone who hasn’t. It is unfair I know.
The way I used to view losses were that, for some reason, they weren’t right and would not make a healthy baby and my body was making the right decision. That did help me .
One or more of those other embryos is the right one if this one isn’t 🙏💐

@Loveintherain congrats on your pregnancy! It is a shame we can't just enjoy being pregnant.
I saw on a thread the other day a woman saying she hates being pregnant she always feels rubbish etc, which is understandable but then at the same time I thought I wish I was lucky enough to be complaining how pregnancy makes me feel. Atm I feel like I'll never get there.

My scan is tomorrow and I'm not holding out much hope, preparing for the worst obviously. I actually look pregnant today I've got a very questionable bump and my boobs are getting them stabby pains, but I know it's just the hcg. Seems cruel

Wishing you the very best for tomorrow x

All the best for today @whataglouriousthingtobe

Well still none the wiser. Went for my scan and they could see a mass of some kind sandwiched between the yolk sac and uterine wall measuring 1.8mm.
She said it could be a fetal pole but because it's so tight in there couldn't check for any cardiac activity. They're not willing to write it off as it could be an early fetal pole. So I have to go back in 7 days for a scan, again. Gestational sac has doubled in size and is now 20mm. Honestly my head is 🤯

Sorry to hear it’s no clearer. With my pregnancy they couldn’t see heartbeat until 6 and half weeks as baby was squashed in a corner. It’s so hard having to keep waiting.

@Smiler79 when you say the baby was squished in a corner what do you mean? They said they can see something they think is a fetal pole but it's squished between the yolk sac and uterine wall, like it's attached to both. Was it like that?

She just said he was hard to measure and couldn’t see heartbeat as he was squashed in the corner of my womb. Once he grew a bit they were able to see everything. They didn’t mention a mass or anything , just it was unclear due to position in womb

Did a test this morning I'm still testing positive. Not sure what to think. Keep having twinges, pulls etc and very bloated but telling myself it's because the sac is still growing.