Anyone doing ivf at 40+

[lucieloos]

We're considering doing a couple more rounds of ivf at 40.5 years old. We have 2 children already but still feel someone is missing.

Is anyone else starting or already having treatment at 40+ and would like to share the journey?

@Anxiousbuthopeful That’s a shame, hope you’re feeling ok. So many kicks along the way with IVF, but I’ve read loads of times that rounds/outcomes can change from one to the next, so hopefully this is an off month.

Glad to hear you have your hysteroscopy booked in! @IslandStars Sorry to hear about your cancelled cycle @Anxiousbuthopeful - I hope next month will work out better for you.

Thanks for the congrats @Garbagepailgal. Unfortunately, I think things may turn out very differently.

I wanted to do another test today to put my mind at rest as the clinic had suggested to me. I order tests from Amazon but they were delayed and I only got them at lunchtime today. So I held off going to the loo for a few hours (probably 3hours) and then tested, and the line is barely there. Definitely much weaker than Wednesday - I've looked at the tests side by side.

I called my clinic and they said yes, the line should be darker. They said I should wait and test again on Monday. I feel like it's all over. I have had no bleeding at all (yet) but I know progesterone could be holding that back. I'm now second-guessing everything - my 'symptoms' have gone away a bit in the last couple of days. I was also getting a lot of cramps as I mentioned and the clinic said that can be normal, but I'm wondering if it was actually a bad sign.

I know it's not officially over yet but it really feels that way. I don't know how I'm going to last out until Monday. I'm terrified now that I'm going to go to the loo and find blood. It feels really cruel that things may have changed so fast. Sorry for the downer, finding it hard to be hopeful.

Oh @lucymills1234 how worrying. I am sorry. But it could be how concentrated one’s wee is, different batch of tests etc. Only way to know for sure is to go for a beta hcg blood draw, is there any way that’s a feasible option?

@lucymills1234 Sorry, really hope it’s just a bad test showing weaker line. It’s so nerve racking, I think I will end up testing every day after a BFP which is just extra stress really!

I think all clinics should do a beta, at least after a BFP so you can track your levels. I know it’s cruel but I think a chemical is better then no implantation after 3 transfers. If that’s what is meant to be this time, you are getting closer.

Does anyone here take ubiquinol? I’m thinking about starting incase I need another fresh round later this year, but I’m dubious as to how much it really works and especially when over 40, can it really improve egg quality?

I’ve always had a good response in terms of eggs & blastocysts, but find euploid embryos harder to come by.

I do have one frozen euploid left, so I’m not sure what to do since ubiquinol is so expensive.

@lucymills1234 I’m sorry to hear this. It does sound like the chemical I had. Perhaps test first thing in the morning in case there were any test/dilution issues. It’s so emotionally and physically draining isn’t it. Big hugs
@IslandStars I used to test every day but it’s used to get me in a state, I started getting up at 3am to test. This pregnancy I stopped after three days for my own sanity.
I used ubiquinol for two years now. I even used a low dose in this pregnancy. I don’t know if it does anything , I have hardly any follicles to start with and got two blasts , one normal. This cycle was ivf/iui and this was normal one.

I also recommend a low carb and high protein diet and both me and dh took all the vitamins in that book ‘ it starts with the egg’

@Garbagepailgal Thank you, I’m leaning towards taking ubiquinol, even though I hope this next FET works, I just feel I need to prepare my body incase it doesn’t.

I follow the same low carb, high protein diet too, have done for years as it helps with other digestive issues I have and I do think it’s helped keep me in good condition generally. I may have to stop ubiquinol during my 2ww after FET, but I’m not transferring until September so will give me good time to get it into my system.

I love your username BTW, brings back good memories

I take all the supplements from ISWTE too! But not so good at low carb. Might try that next!

Thanks @Garbagepailgal I really have very little hope left. I haven't tested again since Friday afternoon - the clinic said wait til Monday. It's incredibly hard waiting but it should give a more definite result in theory. Both tests (Weds and Friday) were FRERs which I know are very reliable. They weren't from the same box but I think I would be clutching at straws to blame a faulty test.

@Anxiousbuthopeful I'll see what the test shows tomorrow and if there is any kind of line I'll pay for bloods. But I doubt there will be :(

@IslandStars I know what you mean about it being progress, but feels hard to accept it as such yet... It may have been the scratch or Clexane that helped implantation, but the embryo was not chromosomally normal. Which then makes me wonder whether either of my 5AAs might have worked if I'd had Clexane/scratch. I've had 7 blasts from 2 cycles and I worry I've used my best ones up. I now have a 5BB, 4AB, 4BB and 3BA left. No really low grades but no more AAs.

I started Co-Q10 (so not the purest form) not very long before my first cycle. I took a lot - about 600mg daily - up until trigger which is when clinic said to stop. I started again after my BFN and probably had about 2 months taking it before my next cycle trigger. On the first cycle I got 2 blasts (from 12 eggs) and on the second 5 blasts (from 18 eggs). All my stims meds were the same. Follicles also grew faster on the second round. Whether the Co-Q10 had any impact is impossible to know because there are so many variables, but I would take it again if I was doing another fresh.

Thanks ladies, one more thing I should have asked, did ubiquinol delay your period at all? I remember when I first stated Pregnecare, my cycles lengthen by an extra 2-3 days. My issue is that my hysteroscopy is now booked according to my cycles, so I don’t want to mess them up, but if I don’t start ubiquinol until after a potential BFN, it won’t make much difference to my eggs. Why are there always so many dilemmas?!

@lucymills1234 Thanks for the info on ubiquinol. Hope you get some luck tomorrow. You do still have good embryos left, BBs and BAs are often the ones that work, none of my 5AA were normal. Sometimes despite all the extra meds and perfect grading, we still need luck. My embryo was euploid, plus my lining was good, yet I still fell on the unlucky side, despite odds being in my favour. If this one isn’t meant to be, I’m sure you’ll get there in the end with these embryos and I would keep the clexane for next cycle.

@lucymills1234 you are very strong to hold off testing. I’m quite weak willed with that side of things.
I have a 5bb in the freezer, I read a lot about them working when the AAs don’t. My 5bb is pgs normal.
It must be so hard for you at the moment but if there’s any positive to be found, it’s if it doesn’t work out and that embryo wasn’t normal at least it didn’t work early. I’ve had 3 get to 9 weeks with heartbeats and it was definitely a lot more heartbreaking then my chemical because I’d bonded and raised my hopes. Not to mention the operations afterwards. I often wished they had ended a lot earlier. I hope you don’t mind me saying that, I understand it’s still devastating at any stage but I’m just saying that the longer a pregnancy lasts it just feels worse in my experience.
I’m hoping that you have a positive outcome on Monday x

@lucymills1234 How are you, have you had any further confirmation?

Hi all.
Hoping it's OK to jump on this thread.
I'm 41 and have two IVF miracles from 2017 and 2019. I've just had a failed FET with our last frozen blast. We were certain that if this didn't work then that's the end. However, we have almost decided to try one more fresh cycle (both of our babies were fresh, both frozen cycles failed for us). I'm battling emotions at the moment... Sometimes I feel that I'm too old and it's not fair to have another but then I'm very young at heart, financially stable and a very good mum and I think why shouldn't I have another. One of my friends (I'm sure she means well, but...) keeps reminding me about my age, what if something happens to me and I leave my other babies without a mum or what about disabilities etc... Which makes me feel rotten .
I know my fertility is almost up as my AMH in 2016 was 7 and in 2019 was 5... So likely around 2/3 now... So this is likely my last year. I have a little spare bedroom for the last member of our family... And I think I would regret it if I don't try just once more.
I would love to hear from others in a similar boat to me as I have noone else to talk to that's in a similar position! Thanks ladies... And I will hopefully catch up with ur situations soon x

Hi all. Sadly, I'm out. I got a negative test on Monday and am now bleeding having stopped meds. I can't get a review with the clinic for weeks because of holidays so feel very powerless at the moment. That also means I won't be going straight into another transfer so I have a delay ahead.

@Garbagepailgal that's great that you have a 5BB PGS normal. I didn't do any testing so I have no idea on mine. What I do know is that before the 4AA was transferred this time they reviewed both the 5BB and 4AA time lapse to see which they thought was the best candidate for thaw and transfer and decided it was the 4AA. So naturally that sets a lower expectation for the 5BB... Sorry to hear about your losses.

@IslandStars yes, I think I'll keep clexane. The big question is do I keep transferring my remaining 4 hoping for a result, or do another complete cycle now to bank more. My inclination is try another FET and then see where things are. One to ask the consultant.

@firefly37 On this thread you'll find lots of us trying for a first baby after 40, so I don't think you'll find anyone arguing you're too old. I can only speak for myself but I have thought long and hard about the impacts and decided to go for it (and I am also single, to add another factor).

Other than the age doubts and the emotional cost of trying again now and failing, are there any other concerns that are holding you back? From a medical side, have you had tests to check where your AMH etc stands currently? If nothing else, having that information could help you make a better informed decision?

@lucymills1234 thanks for reply and I am so very sorry about ur bfn. What do u think will be ur next step? My DP and I decided last night to have one more cycle and a family member has offered us an interest free loan but then I found my last months blood work and my FSH was 15! I didn't pay attention to it as I had a frozen transfer... But on research that's pretty bad I'm led to believe. In 2018 it was 7.8. So I have contacted a clinic in Prague I have read about and hoping to hear from them soon and see what my options are.
Wishing everyone lots of luck xx

@lucymills1234 So sorry to hear that, what an awful process this is. I suppose you wouldn’t know for sure without bloods, but does that mean it was a chemical as you had a positive?

I’d do another FET as you have 4 embryos left. Perhaps clinic could add Lubion and Prednisolone too if you don’t mind taking them...they’re just standard meds to help implantation, but I know some clinics won’t prescribe without the costly immunity tests. You have a lot of embroys so it’s a bit of a needle in a haystack situation as to when one will work.

I had a delayed review after my BFN too, I really think our mental health should be prioritised in these situations. We get offered counselling, but they don’t seem to realise that we need answers/next steps quickly, not just a general chat about infertility and how to cope!

@firefly37 Welcome. I wouldn’t say you’re too old at all. Obviously there are fertility concerns and it takes longer to get pregnant, but in terms of age, at 42 I’m healthy and energetic, 40s are not what they were years ago, plus you already have a young family so any future child would grow up close in age to your eldest. Hope it all works out.

Thanks @IslandStars The clinic are confident it was a chemical as I had several positive tests before the negative. I know this might sound psychosomatic but in the few days prior to testing I also had different symptoms from either previous BFN attempt. I was mentally dismissing it at the time as wishful thinking but it does tie up (especially as those symptoms eased late last week into the weekend).

I cannot shake the feeling that one of my failed 5AAs may have been 'the one' and not having the right mix of meds cost me. But I know that IVF is trial and error and the clinic wouldn't have known to give me Clexane etc from the off. A nurse did actually mention Lubion to me the other day so I will ask the consultant about that.

Yes, the limbo zone is always a horrible place to be. I like to have a plan and at least know what I'm working towards... with information you can make decisions and choices.

@firefly37 it was a chemical rather than BFN so hopefully I'm getting closer... next step will be another FET. I don't know a huge amount about FSH levels - when mine was tested at 41 it was 6, I think. It does often seem that overseas clinics do well with older patients so I am sure they have the experience to guide you. Would be curious to know how you get on, let us know.

@IslandStars ... thanks for welcome.
@lucymills1234... I hope ur next FET is the one.
I've just read up a lot of this thread... Am I right in that you two did embryo/egg banking? My last cycle in 2019 only gave me 3 mature eggs... I suggested to my DP that a couple of rounds of egg collection for me to preserve what I have asap might be something to discuss with the clinic. Was it hard going with the meds tho?
Since reviewing my hideous FSH levels, I've also been researching vitamins etc... Ive bought proceive to start... Did u take anything? I've heard good and bad about DHEA so wasn't sure about that one.xx

Have upset DP... Told him we are on healthy eating and exercise and I've bought him vitamins for his little spermies. If we are gonna do this one last time, we are gonna go in fighting xx

@lucymills1234 It’s good, although still so hard, that you’ve got as far as a chemical and your body could tell the difference between that and BFN in terms of symptoms. I know how you feel about ‘what ifs’ I wonder if I’d had the extra meds for my first FET whether my embryo would have worked, since it was euploid...or if my polyps were there but tiny, so they didn’t spot them. Unfortunately clinics use the first couple of transfers as trial and error. I only managed to get extra meds for my second as I’d done PGS.

Most embryos do fail due to chromosome issues though, so I still think your golden egg is yet to come from your batch. The hope kills us at times, but it does keep us hanging on too. I guess having a lot of embryos has to be a good thing really, better than struggling to produce them, but makes the FET process lengthy unless you get lucky within first few goes.

Hi I’m garbage pail :-) keep mmc as I keep revealing too much info on other threads !
@lucymills1234 I’m sorry it was a negative. I’m glad you have more Frosties though. I never produced more than 2 blasts.
Have you considered ERA? I don’t know if you did it this time. Even though I get pregnant easily my clinic recommended it to me for a blast transfer. Apparently naturally you have 5 days fertility window and with transfers it can be as little as 2 hours which are prime for transfer.
I never took anything after iui other than baby aspirin and 4 cyclogest daily. I think I have a progesterone issue as was always so low and whenever I took progesterone I seemed to fall pregnant. After bfp I went on everything - clexane, prednisone, lubion, 6 cyclogest a day! I’m not sure if I’d take anything before putting in the frosty other than progesterone but not sure. I’m with Gorgy and have followed what he’s told me to do since bfp. Very expensive though, gulp.
@firefly37 My fsh was creeping up from 6 to 10 in 6 months and I took wheatgrass and it went to 9 and stabilised there for 6 months. It’s worth a try but stop it before you cycle ( I just stopped two days before)
Dhea - I had a bad experience with this. You need to get properly tested otherwise if your dhea isn’t low you will mess your hormones up! I missed a cycle because I took it and it made my progesterone levels go really high and my clinic wouldn’t progress as apparently that affects egg quality. You might need to find a fertility clinic that tests your levels and can assess what dose, if any, you need. I’ve read a lot of positive stories on here about it but it’s only useful if your levels are low otherwise it can do the opposite.

Nc not mmc 🤦‍♀️

Thank you @Raspberryswirls... My testosterone level is low at 11... Normal for female apparently 15 to 70 so I thought that's why it would be for me. But I have told the clinic I am looking to start it so I will discuss with them soon hopefully x

I thought mine was low too , I think it was 9 or something but my dheas were high and I never tested them. Anyway moral of story is find somewhere that tests properly and recommends what you should take. My acupuncturist was going to take me to a blood testing place and then she said she would be able to see if I needed them or not.