Is it just me that gets angry?

[bob1985]

Is it just me that gets really angry reading through the comments on articles re NHS provision of ivf and fertility treatment?

There just seem to be so many ignorant people out there. It's always the same (sometimes illogical ) comments.

For example:

1. It's all the woman's fault for leaving it too late. (Because there are no other issues that might make it difficult/impossible to conceive and male factor obviously doesn't play any kind of part)
2. just adopt (which is of course exactly the same as having biological children - also did you adopt? No, why not?)
3. you can't afford a kid if you can't afford ivf (don't even get me started on the over simplification going on here )
4. it's not natural (just plain ignorance)

I could go on......

Point is there should be fair (not unlimited) access on the nhs

I ll b honest the behavioural issues dnt put me off adoption i mean i could give birth to a child with autism or adhd or something its the intrusive nature of it all. Must b stressful to have a stranger telling you wether ur gd enough to have a child or not.

I work in a field where I come across many adopted children. I take my hat off to anyone who makes a decision to adopt. It's an incredibly challenging experience for many, though equally rewarding. I (we) have considered adoption (have 1 dc through ivf) but I am really on the fence. I have seen too much. If I were to adopt I would consider an older child- 4+ as by that stage there is a good gauge in terms of their development and not everyone could cope with a child with additional needs- totally understandable. With babies there are so many unknowns. The amount of children who have gone through the care system with foetal alcohol syndrome disorder (amongst other things) is huge. Quoted as much as 75% at a recent conference. I am thankful that there are amazing people out there who do adopt but it shouldn't be a burden that those with fertility issues should carry. Good luck to everyone on their journeys x

Agree, Kiki. That report had a very unpleasant underlying tone. Yet another thing to lay at the door of infertile people, we’ll add it to the list of wasting NHS money and being selfish for being devastated that we can’t have our own biological child.

I’d be interested to see his actual data that there is a direct causation between the two factors. Citation needed, or say nothing.

And forgive me if I’m not jumping for joy at a woeful 10-30% success rate. What does he propose, compelling scientists to keep success rates low so infertile people have no alternative than try to adopt, with all the challenges and restrictions discussed upthread? Fucking idiots.

I ll tell yous another1 that gets me angry on another thread talkin to ppl in our situation and sum woman butts in that we need tough love and basically a kick up the arse. She says shes struggled with infertility in the past but now has twins easy for her to now say b rational and dnt b bitter she has 2kids now, u think she d b more sympathetic some ppl have short term memory loss!

2fingers, all you can do is try to ignore. People can be cruel and ignorant regardless of if they have had fertility issues or not.

I’m infertile, my eggs are too poor quality to conceive a healthy baby and I’m over forty. I will never have a child. No amount of kicking me up the arse will fix that or stop me being heartbroken.

To add, my eggs were knackered in my thirties, likely my twenties too, so it’s not just an age issue. Something is badly wrong with my ovarian environment and egg quality has suffered. Just in case any delightful person wants to point out that it’s my own fault I’m barren.

Rebecca. You have added nothing to this thread. Which is in the Infertility section of Mumsnet.

@Rebecca seriously?! R u just a troll?!

Me thinks Rebecca is a GF somehow

Rebecca is a troll. She was trolling last night.

I hope you don't mean me! There's more than one Rebecca on here.

I feel sympathy with anyone who is infertile, don't know how I would have felt had it happened to me.

No further comments from me but I sincerely hope I am not the 'rebecca' you are targetting because I wouldn't get involved in something I know little about.

Yep. GF.

@Rachelover40 the advice is 3 cycles.
Most places do 1, some places none.
So fuck right off.

I am genuinely baffled that people will come onto a thread in the infertility board and fertilesplain to us about the logistics, impact and correct reaction to infertility.

What do they think will happen? Gratitude at the sharing of incorrect and patronising information?

Anyway, I’m taking my own advice and ignoring! Have a pleasant Sunday, all 🙂

I am genuinely baffled that people will come onto a thread in the infertility board and fertilesplain to us about the logistics, impact and correct reaction to infertility.

It takes a special sort of arrogance to do that. It makes me really angry.

Please report @Rebecca ladies yes you rebecca thats why ur insensitive comment was deleted and @Rachel40

How hard is it for sum ppl to just mind their own fuckin business?!

@Ladyscience💪💪