Cycle buddies Aug/Sept 2016

[HelloMist]

Anyone just starting a cycle or about to?

I've just got the dates through for my first FET to TTC#2. My first LO is 18 months and was made with the help of ICSI and IVF. I start down regulating in a few weeks.

I've already gone through various emotions and I know there are a lot more to come! Anxiety and indecision wondering how I will cope with a second child if we're that lucky and the possible age gap. Sadness that my clinic told me I had to wean DD1 from the breast. Guilt at thinking about another and no longer 100% about her. (Especially if I weaned her and it doesn't work). Stupid thoughts that led me to test without telling DH when my second postpartum period (after weaning) didn't show on time (only spotting, false hope that it was implantation bleed. It's nearly impossible for us to conceive naturally though. AF came this weekend so here I am). Scared that it won't work. The stats are lower for FET and we only have 2 frosties.

The first injection will be at the end of a family holiday. I probably won't be drinking but don't really want to tell them why not yet. Despite all this I am excited too!

Anyone want to join me as cycle buddies?

Tata, it sucks and it seems completely unfair that we should struggle when it feels like people are popping out kids left right and centre with ease. Chin up, you're doing all the right things.

Absolutely all in good time. It is very very hard. I once had 3 announcements in a day - two of whom are my favourite people in the world. Although I love them and was so happy for them, it was hard as I felt v left behind!!!!
I haven't tried googlebox - should I?!

I feel absolutely exhausted today, keep crying for no reason, feeling anxious over everything... I am really anxious about work this week/my tutoring I do (one parent keeps emailing quibbling over my t and cs and I literally just want to say I will refund her for term and she can find someone else - everyone else is happy, why can't she be?!) and I just want husband home...he gets home tonight and I can't wait :)

Aw Elles sending lots of hugs your way xxxx why don't you snuggle up in a blanket and watch a movie lovely - something from the Avengers series for example, stay away from the rom coms!! Do you have Netflix or Amazon Prime? Let me know and I can recommend something xx

Nope you shouldn't watch Googlebox, no one should really it s so bad but I am a bit of a TV junkie...

Fcuk that's exactly it - it feels unfair that it comes so easily to some and it's so difficult for others... I feel like I m waisting my time waiting, for the appt, for test results, for a call back from the ACU... Working hard on focusing on other things but it's a real challenge!!

Oo I have never tried Avengers?! I have been out for a long walk and busying myself gardening/tidying the house... now YES to snuggle up I think!

Hope you are all ok lovelies xxxx

Wow this thread moves quick!
Hi all, pleased to meet all of you and looking forward to joining you all on your journeys! (Including my own!)

Hi tata - yes certainly. I stopped having periods when I was 14, and was told over and over again to go to the doctors when I was 16, then 18, as they was sure I was still developing. I then got into my first serious relationship when i was 19 & i looked into going on the contraceptive injection (me not having periods didn't even cross my mind). So the alarm bells starting ringing in the doctors head as to why I hadn't restarted my periods yet I went through puberty properly. Height, hair, boobs etc the lot.
They then sent me for investigations. Ultrasounds, mri scans, bone scans, internal scans. I eventually got diagnosed with pituitary failure.
No IVF treatment was started with my previous partner as we were young.
Anyway fast forward 7 years ( 26 now) and I am now with my new fiance and been TTC for 3 years. Went back to the doctors last August and they transferred me straight away to the fertility clinic where they've been treating me ever since.
I have pituitary failure, scans showed very small ovaries but full, and still to this day no period.
Sorry for the long post but that's my story so far.......

Just to add. MASSIVE sex and the city fan!!! & yes that episode with Charlotte will definitely be me!!!

Also same here with the family/friends baby announcements. My two younger sisters both have kiddies, my niece who's now 3, and my nephew who's 18 months.
My youngest sister has just announced her 2nd pregnancy, another baby niece , due on xmas day!
She didn't even know she was pregnant and she's now 26 weeks gone so that's going to be the fastest pregnancy ever for her!!
So happy for her, of course I am, but it's just sad how it can happen to others on accident when we try so hard

Hi All, hope you've all had s nice weekend.

Kez thanks for sharing your story, sounds like you've had a hard time but glad to hear you're on track now. When does treatment start?

Elle's, hope you're ok, good to hear you've had your friends round helping you inject. I hate this time of night as I inject at around 8 so start getting anxious. How you finding the injections? You on menopur? I alternate sides to inject but for some reason my left side really hurts and last night was extra painful for some reason. Dreading doing it tonight even though its my "good" right side.

Not been as emotional as first day but still feel like I could cry at anything and feel absolutely shattered constantly.

Hope everyone else is doing well. Looking forward to hearing some good news/results from scans etc from you lovely ladies this week xxx

Hi good
Just wanted to get my history out there.
I don't start my injections until 25th October. That's my baseline scan and first blood test too. Drugs are getting delivered on Tuesday. So still a while to wait but it will fly by.
Just going to keep busy till then. Throw myself into work and jobs around the house. It will soon be here!

Looking forward to some news from you ladies this week, positive vibes xxx

Hi Kez, thanks for sharing your story
I'm a couple of years older than you but like you I've known quite early on it would be challenging ton conceive on my own so I've known to not wait too long before going to the doctors and get things moving. And despite the frustration I sometime feel, I see this as a positive (knowledge is power!)

Goodthings how did injections go last night?

Elles hope everything's better now that hubby's back? I'm a big Avengers fan, converted by my OH. They are really funny movies and miles away from sobby comedies which is a good thing

Fcuk, Rubz, Kwick, Scan and Bryony (hope I'm not forgetting anyone) I hope you're doing well!? xx

Hi tata. Yes definitely knowing early on has prepared me for what's to come. I just always thought it would happen, you know?
Hope you're all doing well X

Hi Kez! Glad you could join us. It's a good plan to keep busy, hope the time does fly for you.

Feeling strange and nervous for scan tomorrow. Glad I have all of you here to share it with. I'm torn between keeping silent with a couple of close friends (who know that I'm cycling) and telling them more. Feel like sharing details may be a bad idea but it's a burden keeping it all to myself! And I wonder if it could help me become closer to them. They share plenty of their own troubles. On the other hand, I wouldn't keep asking them how it's going if they were TTC. Probably wouldn't even know they were! Another layer of why IF is hard.

Goodthings, I know what you mean about sides. I've got a massive green bruise on 1 side from an injection I struggled with and feel more hesitant the nights I'm injecting near that. I'm getting a bit fed up of the jabs now, will be pleased when I do the last one! I think I read somewhere to use ice to help numb the area, perhaps you could try that?

Elles, that's nice that you have all that support around you!

How was physio, Tata? I know only too well how awful back pain can be.

Avengers etc for escapism seems the way to go. :) Sending hugs and chocolate to those of you who've had an emotional few days.

Goodthings... My left side hurts more too?! I did the right tonight and it was ok! I wondered if it's because I am right handed though that the angle is better when on right! I am on 300 of gonal, quite a high dose... I am doing ok thank you lovely, it's just the emotional side of things...how was yours tonight? Where do you inject? I am into belly! Totally know what you mean about the tiredness... Although was wide awake at 5am today?! Argh! Thinking of you xx

Tata yes thank you, all seems better now! We are not going anywhere this weekend yay so just lots of chill time ahead! Oo will have to try avengers then! Not long until your apt now!

Mist, am keeping everything x for tomorrow... I know what you mean about telling people. A few close friends know it's happening NOW then others know it's going to happen, others know nothing! The people I have told are supportive but not invasive though which is good!

Hey Fcuk, how you feeling?

Kez, Bryony, kwick, scan wait, Rubz (hope not missed anyone) hope all ok xx

Thanks for asking Mist, my back is covered in muscular tape (that stuff is made of fairy dust, I swear it's magic!!) and I have 2 more sessions this week so I'm sure I'll be back to normal in no time! And yes appt is next Monday, not long to go!

I have only told 4 people about this, and that includes my mother, but I definitely appreciate having people I know I can trust to talk to (and I'm sure OH does too, that way he s not the only person I have to talk about this). I find that they don't ask, but will talk if I feel like sharing and that's the right balance for me. I think it's about taking the first step Mist but if they are good friends and you feel you could benefit from their support then I would encourage you to talk to them, it's a lot to carry and friends are the family you chose (aww how nauseatingly cheesy was that!!). In the meantime I will definitely think of you tomorrow, hope everything wull go well xx

Kez I sooo empathise with you, you can't help but day dream about it being easy after all, and having that miracle baby everyone seems to be having right?!

Elles, Goodthing, you're doing everything right and I'm sending loads of good vibes your way!!!

Mist - good luck for today, will be thinking of you. Sorry to hear about bruise that sounds painful.

Elle's - I did think the same thing as I'm right handed too. I get so nervous for the left side. Last night I tried to do it closer to the middle but still on left and it wasn't so bad. I can't wait for these to be over with, but know I've still got a long way to go. Scan isn't until next Tuesday.

Tata - hope your back is feeling better today, exciting for your first acu app next Monday.

Hope everyone else is ok, have a good day ladies xxx

Tata just a thought but have you started taking folic acid or pregnacare yet? Only asking as when I went for my first app they were surprised that I hadn't started taking it (I didn't realise how quick it would all happen and thought I'd still have ages to wait)! Xxx

Good morning all.
Mist good luck for your scan today, hope all goes well!!

Just had a text from HaH, my drugs will be delivered by 12.30pm! Exciting times.

Nothing even starts for me till the end of October so I'll definitely be on the oct/Nov thread after this one haha X

Morning! Thanks for asking Goodthings, yes I have been taking folic acid and vitamin D for a few months now, although it feels kind of pointless at this point. Also staying away from Ibuprofen on GP's recomendation.

Have a good day everyone! xx

My bad is the left side too and am also R handed! I see the bruise and marks as war wounds though and they aren't sore.

Thanks all xx

Good luck today Mist!

Hey all, quiet few days from me. Still crying at the drop of a hat- my husband thinks I'm insane after finding me weeping at a dog video on Facebook 😳 But aside from that it's been all ok. Just counting the days till 3/10 now- not even bothering with POAS week.
Mist how did everything go?
Elles, good things, Kez, Tata, Rubz hope all is well with you guys?
Xx

Evening ladies.
So my drugs arrived today, wow very overwhelming seeing everything in real life!!!
They will sit safely in the fridge and bedroom until 25th October!

Hope all is good with everyone X

Evening all,

Fouk I feel the same, I have good days where I can hold it together and then others where the slightest thing sets me off!

Kez, I was overwhelmed especially as initially the delivery man tried to give me a small bag with someone else's drugs in then comeback with the box! You're one step closer now though!

Mist - how did scan go today?

Hope Elle's, tata and everyone else is ok xxx

Can I join you ladies? I start buserelin inj to downreg on Thursday. First stage in my first ICSI cycle.

Nervous about the whole thing really, aside from the massive will it work question. I've never had any medical procedures before - not even a filling and don't take any medication. All feels really alien.

Welcome Astrid! I only started DR last Wednesday and was petrified but its not that bad, it's just the anxiety of it all I find. Be extra kind to yourself xxx

Just a quick sentence to say scan went well! (frozen) ET booked for next Tues!

It's been a long day. Will try to write again soon. Welcome Astrid!