Anyone else in infertility testing limbo?

[Moondreamer]

I am currently having tests to see why we might be struggling to get pregnant. Months pass in between each test and it just feels like time is going by and we're in limbo waiting for a diagnosis or for the Drs to decide we can have treatment. When read the ongoing threads here most are (understandably) about people having treatment and I just wish we're at that stage after 18 months of no luck and serious trying. Does anyone else feel like they're a bit stuck at a stage between people who are trying excitedly to get pregnant on the TTC boards and people who are having treatment? Obviously I hope we'll be able to have treatment in the future and can join in the chat (or get pregnant naturally!) but for now it would be great to compare notes with people in the testing stage. I hope this doesn't sound like a moan about any other threads because they've been really useful to me over the last months. I'm just feeling a little lonesome and have no one IRL going through the same thing.

Sorry Shoukd be April 2015 bloods not 2014

Thanks Gonegirl and Moondreamer!

Our appointment was fine, neither of us was weighed heh. The doctor wants to do some basic tests on me (blood test is tomorrow and my ultrasound should be next week). The doctor said we are good candidates for ICSI and so at my ultrasound they should fill out the funding form. Not sure what happens after that.

We're both a bit bummed tbh, I just feel a bit down, I'm glad everything is moving along but I'm just a bit meh.

Hi all! Back from my holiday feeling relaxed and revitalised and even a bit more optimistic!

I was waiting to hear back from Guys ACU after being referred by my doctor. When I got back still nothing after making a few calls to the unit I was finally relieved the paper I needed. So now that's all complete now I just wait for an appointment.

So still in limbo but at least things are moving, slowly, but are at least there is progress!
Elektra83 great news to hear you're good candidates for ICSI, don they apply for funding on your behalf? Unsure on the whole funding process.

Welcome Ellabella1 sounds frustrating that you have to wait until hubby's next SA test until you can move forward by August is not that long away. You say you've been trying since 2013, the next appt with GP I would demand to be referred to a fertility clinic. It's so easy for GPs behind their desks to tell us to "wait" but they are not in our position and have no idea what we're going through!!

How is everyone else getting on? Any updates? I know it's been a bit quiet on here hopefully that's not a bad sign!x

Hiya I have my lap and due next week - yikes! I've been so frustrated by the delay and now it's nearly here I'm a getting nervous. I'm on CD 369 today and still no sign of AF - glad I didn't know that my body still wouldn't be working a year after coming off the pill to TTC #1 :-/

Still here too! Just waiting on my AMH results now. Has been 3 weeks but don't really know who to contact to follow it up. It maybe it just takes that long for them to come back?

Welcome back GoneGirl. Glad you had a refreshing break. My holiday was really relaxing too. I think holidays are the way forward in this waiting game . Good news about the progress too.

Hi EllaBella. Sorry you're also stuck waiting. Although hopefully August isn't feeling too far away now. Definitely don't be fobbed off once you see your GP after that though as you've been trying for a fairly long time now.

Hope your lap goes well Moomin.Can you still have it if AF turns up? Trying to schedule tests around cycles is a right pain so I hope they can do it at any time of the cycle for you.

Sorry, didn't see you there too Elektra Sounds like things are really moving on for you. Can definitely identify with the meh feeling though. We were both really down after the dr said he could refer us for IVF. A massive anticlimax! How are you feeling now?

Moomin37 good luck with your lap hope it all goes well.

Moondreamer glad to hear you had a good holiday too!:-) it's always nice to get away from it all isn't it? Your AMH test, was this done at the fertility clinic? I can't remember if you had said. If so is there anyone that could give you an update on this? I'm so impatient, I know 3 weeks isn't that long but when you're waiting for results it can seem like a lifetime! You mentioned your Dr said they could refer you for IVF. How do you feel about that?

Hi everyone, can I join? I'm feeling the same as a lot of you!

So we've been TTC for 2 years, both 31. All tests have shown up as normal including SA, although my progesterone test was apparently borderline low (the GP just said it was fine, but I'm on Duofertility and my fertility adviser said it was borderline low and I should get it redone). We had to wait for 2 years in our region to get referred to a fertility specialist. Just got referred this month and have a 2-month wait for the appointment.

I'm looking forward to the appointment as it feels like 'progress' but I realise from reading this thread that it will just mean more waiting, probably! Very helpful to hear what it might be like though.

It's so difficult isn't it - I really struggle to stay positive. I know I should be able to count my blessings etc but I find it really hard. I feel really alone, I have told a couple of friends and they are supportive but they aren't going through the same thing - and DH is not good at doing the supportive thing - he's more about practical solutions, which there are none.

Looking forward to hearing everyone's updates. x

Hi,

I've been trying for baby #1 for a year now and getting slightly worried as I'm 37 in a few weeks. Got GP appointment this week to see what my options are. I'm hoping they will refer me to fertility clinic .. I'm in two minds if I should just go private to speed up the process ....

I really hate the feeling of the unknown ....

Welcome back Moondreamer and GoneGirl1 glad to hear you had relaxing holidays!

The nurse was really helpful explaining the process after my internal u/s. We've both signed the form, so once they get my husband's blood results back (they did genetic testing on it) they will send our forms to the clinic we picked and then we will hear from them. Sooo more waiting!

I had planned to go to the US for a long weekend towards the end of the year to see my best friend as she is having a baby but now I'm not so sure - the nurse said not to book any holidays! She said it just adds to the stress of the situation so I have no holidays to look forward to, need to make sure I'm still losing weight etc. It's all a bit meh still! I'm mostly coping by throwing myself into work - thank god it's our annual busy period!

kiwiblue I totally get where you're coming from, the few friends I have told about all of this have literally said "at least you have IVF" and go on about someone they knew who went through it and how successful it was as if I should be grateful for this! They don't seem to understand how emotionally draining all of it is. This place is always good for support so keep posting!

Good luck with the GP appt Sugarfairy 7 I hope they are helpful with telling you your options.

Thanks Elektra. Interesting the nurse said no holidays, I would have thought holidays would be a good way of de-stressing and taking your mind off things - although I guess if you're starting treatment it could mess up that?

Good luck Sugarfairy, I totally get you about the feeling of the unknown too! I imagine the GP will do tests and, hopefully, refer you quickly.

What you said Elektra - people don't get how draining it is. Also get the IVF comments from people as well and even from DH a bit - he thinks it's crap we'll probably have to do that, but feels 'we're doing all we can'. He doesn't worry about the future and feel constantly down about it like I do.

Welcome all!

SugarFairy7 if you can afford to go private then why not? It will most certainly speed up the process. Maybe I'm just impatient but NHS seems to be soooooooo slow where I am. Maybe see how your GPappointment goes this week, might help you make a decision?

kiwiblue and Elektra83 you both told more people than me! I told 2 friends and one's reaction was so odd it's put me off discussing with anyone else! It's hard to stay positive but posting on here seems to help me be a bit more optimistic.
Elektra83 it's always nice when you have a helpful nurse/Dr who takes the time to explain the process to you. Hopefully you won't have long to wait for your OH's blood results back.

A few of you mentioned your losing weight. Since I got back from holiday I decided to make some changes too. A friend of mine had IVF & her doctor was super strict with both her and her OH about quitting smoking, cutting out coffee, reducing alcohol amongst things. If I'm honest I have bad eating habits (snacking, not enough fruit & veg etc) so any healthy eating/ weight loss tips please do share! Would love to know how everyone else is getting on..

I'm in limbo too! My GP did lots of blood tests, day 21 and day 3, though they did some on the wrong day so I'm not sure if they count. Now we're waiting for my partner to have his semen analysis done, which will be right after this month's fertile period for me. They keep promising me that I will suddenly get pregnant now the process has started! But apparently once we have his results, either way, we can start the referral process.

So it's just waiting. But I can't handle the buses, I'm no longer expecting a positive result each month and I can't bear so many people getting pregnant so quickly that aren't me!

I don't really have anyone to talk to about it. My friends either are clear they don't want children, and don't want us to have them, or they already have babies. And I tried telling my sister, who said I should 'just relax'. Aaargh!

Welcome ComeLuckyApril That's good news to hear that once your OH's SA test is done you'll get referred. Do you know when you will get the results of your blood test?

"Just relax" JUST what we need to hear - not!! Hope everyone has a lovely Thursday, almost the weekend hooray!

Gonegirl, what was the odd reaction? I've told six people (one, unfortunately, just asked me straight out if we were trying. I'd had a few drinks and couldn't lie. I don't know her that well so it was awkward). I agree, so hard to stay positive, definitely helps knowing you all understand.

Re weight loss maybe just start with a few simple things. Buy healthy snacks so you're prepared for when you get hungry, eg carrot sticks, nuts, fruit. Try eating lighter carbs at dinner eg quinoa, couscous or rice instead of pasta or potatoes. Try not to snack after dinner. These things work for me!

April ... Just relax??!! That is what I'm pretty sure my Mum would say to me if I told her, so I'm not going to!

Had a bit of a meltdown the last couple of days if I'm honest. Did end up really talking to DH about it all though which did help a little. He feels like if it never happens that isn't great but no use stressing about it all the time, we'll just make the best of it... But I really struggle to get to that point

Yeah, 'relax' is putting me off telling anyone else, especially my mum, who thinks of herself as a kind of earth mother figure and got pregnant really quickly with her own.

I got the results! They aren't very comforting though - partly because two were done at the wrong time of the month - they did fsh and lh on day 21 because they weren't properly listening to me, but apparently as long as the numbers are normal that is all that matters. My progesterone was slightly out of range at 28, but I didn't get my period until day 30 so that is probably fine. And I had a debate with the doctor about my thyroid, because I have lots of symptoms but a TSH is within their range so fine. So I'm still clueless about why it's not working for me, and hoping that the referral will help. A few years ago a doctor told me i 'might have a bit of endo' but there was no way to know without an operation, so I'm pretty paranoid about that.

This week is so odd - ran out of fancy ovulation tests just after getting the first flashing high, so vaguely going for it while waiting for more to arrive from Amazon. It's sort of relaxing not having to wee on stuff in the mean time.

I'm cautiously doing mfp to very gently lose weight. I seem to hover around a bmi of 29 and I know it comes to IVF they want you to be under 30, but I've been slowly putting on weight for years.

April your results sound fine... I know what you mean though, it's always in the back of my mind if something isn't quite right. Hopefully the referral will help you get answers and put your mind at rest re the endo.

Does everyone have good results with ovulation tests? I've only used the cheap ones but can't get a positive, but I know I do ovulate from using DuoFertility monitor.

I get nowhere with the cheap ones. I think i drink too much water!

Hi to everyone new! kiwiblue I have found the clearblue digital ones very reliable no matter how much water I drink. Eye wateringly expensive though .

It's interesting reading about people's responses to hearing about infertility/IVF. The 'relax' thing drives me up the wall. I think it shifts the responsibility for not conceiving squarely onto us which gets my back up straight away. Plus many unrelated people seem to get pregnant so I doubt this is the crucial variable for all of us.

Moan alert but it's not been a great week as we had our IVF funding application turned down because the dr wrote we were waiting for more tests in his referral letter. I'm so annoyed with the dr who referred us as he said these tests were just for our piece of mind yet now they're stopping us accessing IVF.

GoneGirl I followed up the AMH test with the fertility clinic and they said these tests are taking ages at the moment so I guess it's more waiting.

So now we're waiting for these piece of mind tests which we were referred for nearly a month ago! I need another holiday . Am planing to use the wait to lose some weight and get healthy (less wine etc). It feels like I need to be doing something constructive with the time.

unrelaxed people not unrelated people! Thanks spell check.

Moondreamer, thanks re the clearblue - they do sound very good!

Oh that's so annoying re the IVF referral. I don't really understand how the IVF funding applications work but that sounds so annoying - everything takes so long doesn't it?! Hopefully once you get the peace of mind tests you can get referred quickly. Fingers crossed for you.

I asked my GP today if I could get a repeat progesterone test as mine was quite low (17). She wasn't that keen as technically I'm within the 'normal' range (which is silly as apparently it needs to be above 30 to indicate you have ovulated?). I managed to convince her though. I told her that I have to wait another 2 months for my fertility specialist appt (we just got referred) and I want to know NOW if something is wrong with me, not wait months and months more. I think she thought I was a control freak (can't think why )

She also told me (again) not to drink any alcohol - I told her I'm obviously careful most of the time after ovulation but I couldn't have not drunk anything for the last two years!! I was certainly a lot stricter when we started TTC!

Can I join in? We have been trying since March 2014. My periods are horrendous, they make me physically ill, and have affected my job. I already have a DD from a previous relationship, and that, plus the fact I am still in my 20s, means that I can't seem to get a referral for anything, even the rotten periods. My GP says they will just suggest I go back on the pill. Which is useful, given we are TTC.
I am struggling at the minute. The few people I have told have said "you will have one eventually!" As if they can see into my uterus

Welcome OutVileJelly, sounds like you're having a really tough time of it at the moment. I can't believe they won't refer you when you are in that much pain, that's rotten. Have you tried a different GP?

I like the idea of these 'helpful' people with their x-ray eyes , not helpful though is it?

Hi newbies!

kiwiblue the nurse's reasoning was that we don't know when the treatment will start and so if we book a holiday but then can't go because of the treatment, we will stress out over it. Makes sense I suppose, bit annoying as right now I'd love a holiday!

We've received our pack from the fertility clinic which was a bit of a surprise, it all suddenly feels so real.

Welcome to all the newbies - it's good to see more people on here :-)

Elektra think we received good news around the same time as
I've made progress with the clinic-I have a pre-assessment appointment next Wednesday with OH and a nurse. So things are moving along. I just need to prepare myself with a few questions I'll like answered so I can get more familiar with this whole ivf/icsi process...

kiwiblue sorry to hear about your meltdown. I think we've all been there! How are you feeling now? By the way the friend's reaction was "what's wrong with you/him?" (Charming!) At the time I wasn't diagnosed with endo yet so genuinely didn't know if anything was "wrong" with me or DH so that's what I said. Then she responded with "well you're obviously not having enough sex". Like that solves the problem!! I don't know, maybe she was just shocked to hear the news but it was a really odd reaction, no compassion at all. So after that I've kept it to myself! I don't want anymore awkward convos with people who just don't "get it".

Ovulation tests have never worked for me.. Clear blue are v expensive. I've never tried cheapies though.

Moondreamer sorry to hear about your IVF funding app being turned down. What is wrong with your Dr?! Surely he would've known saying you're waiting for more tests would delay things?? I don't understand how IVF funding works either. Fingers crossed those test results come back with good news and you can get the ball rolling