Starting IVF/ICSI this month - anyone want to join the journey?

[Rumplestrumpet]

After over 2.5 years TTC, we're FINALLY about to start our fertility treatment this month (ICSI). My nurse and husband forbade me from chats and forums, but after following MN threads over recent years I think it would be a great help to share the experience with those going through the same thing.

Anyone else want to share the joys/terrors of belly injections, hormonal madness and a series of medical professionals poking around your nether regions?! And, of course, hopefully a BFP at the end of it all

I've just realised that is far too many smileys for one post. Sorry!

Oh god yes, I've only taken one suppository thing and they are horrible! It's kind of leaked out of me all day! Apparently normal, was told it's the waxy covering coming out! ??
I'm half considering trying to insert them anally! ?? but not sure I can bear it. I'm thinking it might stay in better and cause less mess?!?
I doubt I'll want any sex while on vaginal suppositories, it's gross!
Tmi I know but they also smell gross! Not exactly a turn on for my hubby lol

Rumple; can't believe anyone could possibly not symptom spot. I'm terrible for it. I've convinced myself I'm pregnant every month for the last two years of us trying lol
Maybe the hot flushes are successful implantation rather than your body rejecting ????I feel for you..... In a few days I'll be in your position, symptom spotting all day long!

Oh, Seb, THANK YOU for saying that about the pessaries, exactly the same is happening to me and it's awful!!! I've started doing them rectally instead because so much white goop is coming out it can't really be doing much surely - and it makes me paranoid that it's going to stain my clothes in some weird way. Awful! Honestly, this whole process is full of gross surprises :)

No idea how to get through the 2ww Rumple, I suspect sex is a good time killer at the very least ;) Though for my part, after EC I'm still thinking there's going to be a long period of time before anyone goes near my lady parts again!

Heart goes out to allchat. Best of luck to everyone else...

The progesterone I'm given is Crinone and it has to be taken vaginally. And after a day or so the stuff goes horrible with white waxy lumps - looks gross (like papier mâché!) - AND dries me out completely. So although we were told that we could have sex after ET (but not after EC because of risk of infection), we tried once and then gave up. It was horribly uncomfortable and no fun for either of us. Which is pretty sad really, as has been said, it would be nice to have the physical closeness.

Find out later today how many have fertilised..

I'm sad for us all and our non-existant sex lives... but then maybe that's good practice for when the babies come along?!? At least it will be an upside of a BFN - get back to baby-making the old fashioned way for a while!

Smidge and Seb - any news on fertilisation? Really hoping those eggs are good'uns!

morning all. back from sunny Ibiza to wet blighty.

can't believe how fast things are moving for all of you now. really hoping for lots of bfps in the next few weeks.

I'm glad I have you lot to prepare me for the gory details of suppositories and alike! lol! just a thought - would a softcup(?) help keep it where it needs to be a bit longer?

allchat for you. hope you are OK.

as for the sex issue I can't imagine that will be a problem for us. dh has next to no drive so I think it will be cuddles only! I'm expecting the sex to dry up once I start bcp as that kills my drive. makes me sad really but its what we were like before ttc.

I'm hoping you ladies can help settle my mind. this is my last cycle before I start bcp. I've been told to call clinic on cd1 of next cycle between 16/11 and 10/12. my temp has gone up today so ovulated either cd15 or 16 meaning AF will be due 13 or 14/11. what do I do? what will clinic do? I'm hoping they will just tell me to start bcp anyway as I won't get another AF before 10/12. does anyone have any experience of this? I'm also considering using the nurses writing error against them lol. she wrote 6/11 on my form but she definitely meant 16th

Just a quick update - 6 out of the 8 eggs have fertilised. Now it's a waiting game...

that's great smidge. fx they all grow strong.

Great news Smidge , 6 out of 8 is a good result. Fingers and toes crossed they grow well over the next couple of days. Will you be able to choose between a day 3 or 5 transfer, or to the clinic decide for you? My clinic allowed us to decide, but strongly recommended we wait for blasts on day 5. It was probably the right decision, as this way they were able to select the strongest one to transfer, but it was a nail-biting couple of days!

Lil I wouldn't worry about the dates too much - just call on CD1 and see what they say. Like you said, you can play the innocent - if it's within the dates written down then they should be ok. If it looks like they're going to postpone you til next month, you could try and push/beg/plead etc (that's kind of what I did, and it worked!). But the key thing is that you ARE going to get treatment, and very soon. A delay of a few weeks can be heartbreaking, but it won't knock you down.

And on the sex side of thing, I think the most important thing is affection and intimacy. If you're happy with the way you express it, that's the most important thing. While I love having an actice sex life, my favourite thing in the whole world is a lovely cuddle. Which thankfully I'm getting plenty of at the moment, so I'll survive for now!

Seb any news on your eggs? Hope they fertilised well.

Just found out 7 out of 7 of my eggs have fertilised. all 7 we're graded A-C, mostly A/B, so I'm delighted. Although nurse said a lot can change in 24 hrs! But fingers crossed at least one will make day 5 blast. Waiting game for me too...

Woohoo!!! That's fabulous news Seb !! You can't have asked for more! You and Smidge each have a good sized batch, here's hoping they all progress well!!

That's great news for both Seb and Smidge. Yay!

congrats seb, great news!

thanks rumples I think that's what I'll do and try not to worry in the meantime. your right. its happening and that's all that matters. the exact date it happens is irrelevant.

Afternoon ladies,

Just a quick note to wish everyone a fabulous weekend. I hope Seb and Smidge get good news on the embryos, and that Nutty's scan went well today and there are some healthy eggs growing in there.

Tail and Moo I hope the 2ww isn't proving too difficult for you both yet, and that you're managing to avoid the dreaded symptom spotting. I think Tail must be near to testing day? We're all hoping you'll be the first to kick off a BFP trend - Keep us posted!

For everyone else, I hope you're staying sane and keeping positive.

I shall be leaving work early and plan to try to seduce my DH, ha ha, happy weekend all!

Hi there. The embryologist called today to say that 4 of the 6 fertilised eggs have made it to 8 cell embryos. The other two are out of the running, but apparently these 4 look good - all nice shaped, evenly-sized cells (or something!). Now the really scary wait begins as so many drop off from day 3 to blasto. Last time we had 5 at day3, and only got 1 blasto so I'm especially nervous. rumples I think you asked if I get a choice of day3 or day5... Our clinic insists on day5 as they believe if the embryo doesn't make it to day 5 in the Petri dish, it wouldn't have made it inside the womb either. Makes it a really nerve wracking last couple of days though.

Blood test tomorrow to check my body is looking good for the (FX) transfer on Monday. (But what would actually happen if my hormones don't look ready? )

Really struggling to think of anything other than those little Petri dishes at the moment.

How is the 2ww peeps? Would love to hear how you're doing/coping. I'll be joining you soon and no doubt worrying the whole way. Hope you're both surviving.

PS Hope your seduction worked rumples!

Smidge; interesting to hear your having a blood test to access if your body is ready for transfer. I'm not having this as far as I know.... Was wondering if it's standard? Seems a little pointless at this stage. Surely they wouldn't say 'no' we can't proceed your body isn't ready!

Day 4 for my embryos today. 6 out of the 7 have progressed really well, graded A/B, normal cell division etc. Remaining one progressing normally, but at slightly slower growth, graded C. So fingers crossed I'll have day 5 blast transfer tomorrow. I'm secretly also hoping a couple of embryos might make it for freezing.
I'm dreading the two week wait.... I already have the testing date on calendar! How's it going for those of you in the middle of it?
I'm also suddenly quite nervous of the egg transfer... Any of those that have been through it; is it painful during or after? Did you have to lie down after? Take it easy for the day?

Great news on all these happy healthy embryos!!

Best of luck with the blood test Smidge - I guess if they don't think you're ready they'll freeze the embryos and transfer them at another time, but fingers crossed all goes well.

Seb good luck tomorrow. My ET was super easy, no worse than a smear test only longer. I got the bus home and then went straight out for lunch and a long walk! Wouldn't necessarily advise that (was knackered in the evening) but it felt good and the nurse told me that it was better towalk around than stay in bed all day as it was good for circulation. So I would say don't worry about it, and just see how you feel.

Seb the blood test is something my clinic always do the day before transfer. Got my results back pretty quickly and have been given the go ahead for tomorrow. Apparently they were testing to make sure my oestrogen levels had dropped and progesterone risen so a nice welcoming environment awaits the blasto. I think as rumples suggested, if there had been a problem, they would probably have frozen any blasts for another month.

I've only had one ET before, and I didn't enjoy it at all. Glad to hear rumples experience was better though, so hope mine was a one off. Worth noting that I also had a terrible time at my initial hicosy testing (which a lot of other ladies have said was fine for them) so have decided my cervix is very tight or something!! However, even though I preferred EC to ET (as was under anaesthetic) the procedure itself was only a matter of minutes (5...or 10 max) and afterwards there was no discomfort at all. I think my doctor is a bit aggressive with the implements to be honest, as I don't have the same issue for a smear! (And I plan on not having quite as full a bladder this time round, as I think the nurse pressing on the full bladder made me tense up more than from what was going on down under!!)

Have decided hubby and I should go out to the pub for dinner tonight. Might even have a glass of wine given our embryos are safely in Petri juice. actually I'll probably chicken out just in case any booze lingers

Good luck tomorrow, Smidge, I hope it's easier than last time. Mine was easy too so hopefully yours was just an anomaly. I think a glass of wine is a very good idea!

The 2ww is pretty much endless as far as I can tell.. I'm allowed to test on Weds. Not symptom spotting is basically impossible... and I've pretty much convinced myself I have PMT. Turned into a giant green rage monster at work on Friday, oh dear, luckily they cut me some slack - not my finest hour!

Positive thoughts for you all, especially Seb, hope the ET is going ahead today.

Thanks tail. Today's transfer was definitely better, thankyou. Partly I think as I feel a lot less bloated/sore going in than last time, partly as I didn't drink quite so much water so my bladder wasn't overflowing, and my doctor kind of admitted that she thinks last time she didn't have the right angle to insert the tubey thing. This time I barely noticed it go through my cervix, which is so different from my previous experience I can't tell you!

Did have pain initially though (really quite significant) when she used the speculum, until she decided perhaps they'd use the smaller size speculum! Made such a difference! I think she'd somehow caught some of my skin in the larger one when trying to slide it in as it felt so sharp and absolutely killed even when she took it out. I thought i must have been bleeding from it (but no). Smaller one, no problem at all, and what with barely noticing the tube I almost skipped back out of the room when it was done! I felt and feel so much better than last time there's a big smile on my face .

As for the embryo, they had a blastocyst to transfer, 'mid quality', which the embryologist said was most common (whether or not that is true I don't know!). Of the others it looks as if one might make it to freezing, but I wasn't convinced at its quality - or perhaps they just didn't pick it for transfer today as he said it was roughly 6-8 hours behind in development. So maybe it will still end up ok... Hard to tell. He said not to forget that it's possible that blasto was fertilised a couple of hours after the one they transfered, so it may not be that much behind in the scheme of things.

Gosh, Wednesday isn't far away for you now. How are you feeling? I mean mentally mostly, rather than physically. I began to spot 2 days before test day last time round and did a test which was as white as white. So I'm dreading getting close to test day as I always spot. This time I'll be on Clexane too, which is a blood thinner, so I imagine I'll be even more likely to spot.

Great news on the transfer Smidge I'm so glad it all went well - it shouldn't be very painful, but I suppose it sometimes isn't a straight path for the doctors to follow. As for the speculum, I'm wincing, crossing my legs and trying not to imagine it! You'd think these doctors would be a bit more careful, wouldn't you?! Any news on the potential frostie? Hopefully you won't need it of course, but belts and braces and all that ;) Welcome to the 2ww!!

Seb hope the transfer went well for you too.

Tail if you can manage not to attack anyone at work I think you're doing well. They won't mind a little hormonal rage every now and then - hopefully they'll have to get used to it, and you'll get a BFP in a couple of days!

I was googling "how early can I test after IVF?" yesterday and almost did a poas test! Managed to restrain myself, but only because I knew that a negative would just be so upsetting, but I wouldn't actually believe it until the blood test at the weekend. It's going to be a long week....

Tail how are you doing? You must be desperate to test by now. I had a look back through the thread and reckon you must be 12dp5dt? My doctor told me at our ET today they will call me in for my blood test at 11dp5dt.... so if you have no sign of AF by now I would be getting v excited in your shoes! Have you been tempted to POAS? stupid question, I'm probably really asking 'have you peed on a stick!

And rumples and moo are you both on the same schedule for test day? I haven't seen many posts from moo lately... Are you still lurking? Hope everything is going well for you too.

Yay Smidge, so pleased that it was less bad than last time!

I don't really know how I feel anymore, I'm so hormonal... sleeping badly, too, thanks to constant mild ache in belly. It's like the worst PMS bloating ever... so physically, not a barrel of laughs (whingy, basically, is what I am:)). Mentally... confused, sort of scared, sort of want 2ww to be over and sort of don't!

My clinic don't do a blood test, they just leave you to wait and see. I'm sure I'll end up POAS tomorrow if there's no AF by then. I swear, going for a wee has never been so scary. It almost makes me want to laugh, every time I'm like - no AF! OMG! Hope can live for another hour!

So basically, my sense of perspective is sort of shot.