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Original poster

boy alfie

98 replies

TheRealPhartiphukborlz · 18/02/2009 18:23

what if anything have you told your dc's???

have been trying to avoid them knowing, but as we are near to where he comes from one heard it mentioned on the news.

i just brushed it aside as chav behaviour having babies too young.

OP posts:
daftpunk · 18/02/2009 18:48

all this lovie talk [sick]...oh it's a chance to talk about "relationships".....no...it's a chance to say...look at that utter crap family....thank god we're not them!.

Original poster
TheRealPhartiphukborlz · 18/02/2009 18:49

lol daftpunk

OP posts:
oxocube · 18/02/2009 18:50

I am certainly happy to talk to my older two (11 and 13) about this and sex in general. Think your dismissal of these poor kids as 'chavs' is tragic really . Personally, I think the idea of 12 year olds having sex is very sad and, to me unacceptable, but the fact is, it happens and pretending otherwise helps nobody.

lockets · 18/02/2009 18:53

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psychomum5 · 18/02/2009 18:54

ok, sorry, it is your DD.

still talk to her.

tell her that it is families with different values to your own, but don;t talk about them in a judgemental way like calling them 'chavs'. how the hell do you know that other people don;t look at your family and think similar???

you need to help instill in her self respect, and tell her that normally, kids like these that have sex young are normally just searching for something not gained from their families. they are searching for a feeling of being loved, or even just liked. THAT is normally the reason for teens having sex......they don;t like themselves very much, so they think sex is the answer

nkf · 18/02/2009 18:54

It hasn't come up in my house but the boy is very young. A conversation about feelings and sexual desire and contraception seems a bit odd to me, given the age of the boy involved. It seems to imply that the problem is taht he didn't use contraception.

lockets · 18/02/2009 18:55

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mollyroger · 18/02/2009 18:55

I do know what you mean about the idea being repugnant. As I said, my eldest is 11. I'm looking at him now, all babyfaced, watching Top Gear and drinking milk (how wholesome!) and the idea of him in a years' time, getting jiggy with it is utterly alien and vile.
At the moment he is scared of girls and prefers lego...but sadly, society these days means children are perhaps exposed to more pressure than when I was 12. (back in 1907) And so, it isn't encouraging precocity to use the next year of so to talk about relationships and resposbile sexual behaviour.
Otherwise, regardless of where you live, or the circles you move in, it could well be the father of some poor 15-year-old knocking at your door in a few years' time.
I know it takes two, but if one of the two has some sense (or knowledge), such predicaments could be avoided.

lljkk · 18/02/2009 18:56

I don't have a problem with dc (age 7 & 9) knowing (not that they do, they don't pay that much attention to boring stuff the news. Why would I worry? They know the basic facts of sex... It's an excellent opportunity to talk about why sex should be reserved for adults!

oxocube · 18/02/2009 18:57

Although I do have to say that I would not lead my kids to believe that having children when they are still kids themselves was in any way a smart thing to do. I think you can discuss the issues and give your point of view without being judgmental.

TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 18:59

I did it Pag's way

ds1 however whilstadoring babies has atched uswith Bas and knows thework they bring

phew

TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 19:01

one of the good things about living here is that chav just means a certain dress style- mn seems toputsomuchmore venominto it (not spec. op!)

psychomum5 · 18/02/2009 19:07
TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 19:13

LOL Psycho

i'll send you over the local, mums getting their kids to swear at you if your 3 yr old looks at their ten year old the wrong way 'age aint farkin nothin to do wiv it'

tis like a theme day out in charmland

psychomum5 · 18/02/2009 19:17

oooh, I know people like that.

the type that think mcdonalds is fine dining

TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 19:20
psychomum5 · 18/02/2009 19:21

OMG, really??

ROFL

MarmadukeScarlet · 18/02/2009 19:24

I posted on an In the news thread that I had been gearing up to have 'the talk' with my 9 yr old DD, this proved an excellent intro.

I am afraid when she asked about it when the news was on (yes she watches the news and reads the paper) I did say I thought it was a dreadful shame for 2 children to have a child themselves and higlighted all the things that they might miss out on because of it (having fun, a decent education, a decent career, going on lovely holidays etc) because the concept of emotional maturity etc may be a little too abstract for her to understand.

KayHarker · 18/02/2009 19:26

Crikey, every town has chavs. Just like it has goths and emos and old ladies and odd women who dress like Victorian ladies. Well, ok, maybe just my town has that last one.

I haven't told mine anything about it. They know nahthink.

Desiderata · 18/02/2009 19:28

... and she has a really chavvy name

TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 19:32

kay we had a granny who wore hotpants (known locally as Granny Hotpants ),and a man who dreassed ike Elvis if that suits LOL?

i think we have somany who fit the chaav uniform stereotype regardless of any other detail that the terrm has become generic IYSWIM

ScorpiowithabigS · 18/02/2009 19:34
KayHarker · 18/02/2009 19:39

Well, in my town, it's me that dresses like a victorian lady

TheyCallMePeachy · 18/02/2009 19:40

ah well I dont think i'm officiallt listedas a Bridgwater Type yet but prob only coz I moved LOL

ScorpiowithabigS · 18/02/2009 19:41

you can take the girl out of Bridgwater.....