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Couple angry over surrogate DNA mix up - don't want child because of their race. Opinions?

108 replies

tirednhungry247 · 20/08/2019 00:00

Surrogate gives birth to wrong child after hospital mix-up
mol.im/a/7369307

So saddened and shocked for the family expecting and the little baby. What do we think is the right thing to do here?

OP posts:
TrainspottingWelsh · 21/08/2019 20:25

Exactly why, head in the sand to avoid inconvenient truths

NeelixFelicis · 21/08/2019 21:22

Ethics dictate there can be no monetary value placed on individual organs, due to the risk of people being viewed as a tradeable commodity, crime & exploitation by the black market, and the possible temptation of the desperate enough to sell their own 'spare' body parts.

But, it's okay to buy and sell whole human beings?!

I will never understand this. Surrogacy is one step off child trafficking.

BrienneofTarthILoveYou · 21/08/2019 23:01

Agree @NeelixFelicis

Dervel · 26/08/2019 13:17

The suffering involved by those desperate for children but unable to have them for whatever reason isn’t really a coherent argument in and of itself. The suffering of one group of people has no bearing on the moral/ethical violations that come from the exploitation of women nor the commodification of babies.

Those who are unable to conceive comes from a medical condition. It is not incumbent on humanity to rectify that if it means exploitation of others. You can make a utilitarian argument if you wish, but you’d have to establish that there would be less suffering overall, and I’ve not seen any pro-surrogacy advocates put in the leg work to establish this. Plus the same utilitarian base could be used to legitimise organ harvesting for commercial purposes.

Other than that it’s just an appeal to emotion which honestly both sides in the debate can utilise so it doesn’t really resolve anything.

There is also an environmental dimension to the discussion in that our planet and birth rates are potentially catastrophically high. One of the most polluting things we can do is to make more people. Seeking to bypass any and all natural pressures on population growth and the effects on the environment is also a consideration.

Yes I am lucky enough to be a parent, yes I have have sympathy for those that don’t, but my status as a parent doesn’t affect the validity of my argument. I am very happy to throw public funds towards people who cannot conceive for therapy to help them come to terms with that, but not to inflict exploitation upon others.

MaximusHeadroom · 03/09/2019 08:44

I would rather be pregnant than work a shit job tbh!

The difference is that at any time, you can leave a shit job. A woman who agrees to be a surrogate cannot leave because she develops health problems later in the pregnancy or just decides she doesn't want to be pregnant.

What if complications arise which mean that the surrogate needs to have a late termination in order to retain her fertility? If it was her own child, she would probably want to continue with the pregnancy but as a surrogate, why should she give up her ability to have future children in order to give someone else their child? If she is being paid, is the provision of the baby to the clients covered under contract law?

I think surrogacy is a beautiful idea but in reality, I think it is so difficult to ensure that the surrogate isn't being exploited and that decisions are made in her best interests.

I know it is counter intuitive to say that women shouldn't be paid for surrogacy because it feels like you are forcing the surrogates to take a financial hit as well as the big sacrifice they are making. But this current legislation is a fudge and until we really explore these issues and find a way to protect both the surrogate and the child, I feel that there are too many scenarios which could end tragically.

MaximusHeadroom · 03/09/2019 08:51

@StockTakeFucks

The story about the woman who was actually carrying one of her own babies and one for another couple instead of the other couple's twins is awful.

I suspect too that it was only with the Chinese couple's cooperation that she got her baby back at all.

Read any thread on MN about birth or pregnancy experiences and you will see that every one of us has a unique story to tell. To try and standardise this process into something which can be regulated and monetised is just not possible. It is a study in statistical outliers.

StockTakeFucks · 04/09/2019 16:27

How sentimental,beautiful and charming.

Hmm

www.mother-surrogate.com/mother-or-figure.html

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