I'm Jack Monroe. Ask me anything.

[MxJackMonroe]

Hi Mumsnet.

It seems every time I am in the news, a MN thread about all things transgender crops up. I didn't see the last one (yesterday?) as I don't come on here very often these days - people who eavesdrop etc etc. I was cooking in a tent in a muddy field all day, having a ball, not googling myself on the internet!

The thread was deleted - which was nothing to do with me, nor my lawyer. The day I call him about a MN thread is the day I pack everything in for good. So far only the Mail and Hopkins have had legal action taken against them, and both for quite serious statements. I'm not rich enough nor quite bothered enough to call him every time someone says mean words on the internets.

ANYWAY. Threads about me tend to get deleted. So here's a new one. Because there are clearly some questions that keep coming up, criticisms that I could answer, speculation I could clarify and untruths that could do with correction.

So I'm taking questions. I'm an adult and I take an awful lot of criticism and unkindness online, on the chin. I am pretty mentally stable right now, and feel this could be a constructive discussion.

In order to stop this descending into pandemonium, using general 'chair' rules, to start with I'll take one question from each user - if it's quiet and everything gets answered, feel free to add follow up questions.

It doesn't have to be about boobs, dresses, hormones. Literally ask me anything.

MN - please don't delete this thread. I think people have valid things to say and I'm here with my big girl/boy pants on to hear them.

Over to you.

How do your family deal with your trans status?I only ask because I know a family in the same situation xx

I'm only on page 30, but before the thread fills up, I wanted to say, Jack, that I am concerned about a lot of trans issues and their implications but I really respect you for coming here to talk and you have really come across as a flesh-and-blood person and not a mouthpiece or media figure. Thanks.

Ah, I didn't see that they changed their name only 5 years ago....quite a few pages to wade through!

Hi Jack

Thank you for coming on here and addressing people's questions, especially when you don't owe anyone anything.

I'm always surprised by how bothered people are by other people's lives and choices. There is always going to be someone with a different point of view or opinion in life, hopefully one day people will see this as a positive so that we can learn more from others rather than aggressively arguing or resorting to insults.

Im sure that by being honest about your experiences and starting up a discussion about sexuality you will help to start to get people thinking and opening up new ideas.

Growing up I was the only child in my school with a gay parent and at that time it was very unusual so I was singled out, thankfully time has helped people to be more understanding and open to change.

Whether people agree with you or not is irrelevant, thank you for being brave enough to start new discussions and ways of thinking.

All the best for a lovely summer with your son.

"( I recommend Live XXL 001( from boots) to get that look, if you are still being to be frugal and doing it yourself)"

Personally I prefer Bleach London's powder bleach. Only maybe £2 more than Live but much less yellow. And on short hair you can divvy it up and use the one packet to do two dyes...

Mx is pronounced "Mick's".

Or "mix" maybe

Surely it's just mix but without the i? So mx. It isn't difficult, is it?

But what does Mx actually mean?

Haven't we got Ms for anyone rejecting Miss or Mrs? Or am I being very old-school feminist here?

Pass at that one! I think the point is so there's no clue whether m/f, so I kind of like the idea of it. Nobody (advertising etc) needs to know whether I'm ms or mr unless it's actually relevant to sex, in which case I would tell them in the 'sex not gender!! box'.
But then I wonder why we still need titles at all?

jack. Are you worried that the daily mail will be salivating over this thread and probably writing some god awful article on you using stuff from here which they will probably twist?

Hadn't realised you were taking legal action against Hopkins. Best thing I've read all day.

I'm always surprised by how bothered people are by other people's lives and choices.

Exteapolating from the thread on wearing or not wearing a bra that is nearing 1000 posts, it would appear that anyone remotely gender nonconforming has an Everest type mountain to climb in our society.

It's late, I know - but this q&a comes across as strange as there are more q's than a's - and the q's are more commonly answered by someone other than the OP.
If I'm wrong ........well, it's late.

Mr - I am male
Mrs - I am female and married
Miss - I am female and unmarried
Ms - I am female and my marital status is not relevant
Mx - I am a person and my gender is really of no relevance here, I just want to order towels from John Lewis online, can't you just send them to my house, FGS.

Yes, what do MX mean? There's a lot of different labels these days.

this q&a comes across as strange as there are more q's than a's

Have you ever read a web Q&A before?

Isn't mumsnet wonderful!
I love that we live in a society where it's "ok" to not conform.
I'm a useless bloody cook, where do I start? I feel like a crap mum sometimes as my dc have food that isn't home made from scratch.
Recommend me one of your books please :)
Lovely thread to read btw

I honestly do not live under a rock but I had never heard of you - sorry. Good luck with being you. Hopefully, times are changing and we will one day be past labels of gender and sexuality. In the seventies the idea of same sex marriage was almost unthinkable...cultures shift 😊

Think we're shortly going to run out of space so I hope we can have a follow-on thread in which you can direct me to your previous answer Jack :-)
Night all.

"Mx - I am a person and my gender is really of no relevance here, I just want to order towels from John Lewis online, can't you just send them to my house, FGS."

That would be all of us, I imagine.

You make it sound like Mx = Ssf, for special snowflake. Pronounced "sphh".

I am wondering if there's a difference between the kind of debate that happens here than the 140 character ones on Twitter.

I expect Jack was not expecting this level of analysis

Mx - I am a person and my gender is really of no relevance here

I disagree with this definition. I think it says, "I'm female and I want everyone to know I'm a non-conformist".

I'd eat my hat if a man ever used the title "Mx".

I know men who use Mx Rhonda mainly within LGBT / feminist communities. I don't think it's a 'special snowflake' thing at all (god I hate that insult) and most people who use Mx would much prefer we didn't use titles at all IME. I fully agree with the "I just want to order towels" definition!

Hello again Jack,
Thank you for saying you would get to the "what is a woman" question. I do appreciate you coming on here and talking about difficult stuff. I agree that twitter doesn't have a lot of flexibility in way that things can be talked about. I like the discursive style of mn - it's open ended and allows for conversation - and I appreciate that you are engaging with it in that way - I'm surprised you're still here! (in a good way)

"I do try to be a decent human. I accept I don't have all the answers."

I appreciate this. It is obvious from everything you have done about food / poverty activism that you are more than a decent human. And accepting that you don't have all the answers is appreciated from me too, because there are a lot of fraught issues around gender and a lot of people taking very polarised positions and insisting they do have all the answers.