100 things you don't need to do before you die

[Dillytante]

Although I don't have a bucket list because I'd find it guilt inducing (more things to do that I just don't have time for) I am a bit of a sucker for feeling like I should do things. So was pleased to read this Graun article 100 things you don't need to do before you die so I could cross a few things off.

I'm already crossing climbing Everest off as I have just read Into Thin Air about the 1996 disaster where a load of climbers died. And the ones that didn't seem to have such a miserable time anyway. So defo not doing that.

Anyone else got any more I can cross off my list? Places I don't need to go? Books I don't need to read?

YY to camping. Likewise glamping. Still means freezing your tits off (assuming they haven't fallen off with boredom first) and spidery toilets.

Ice skating. Scary and arses never were designed to meet a frozen surface at speed .

Baby led weaning

Scary, messy, time consuming, complete waste of time because, believe it or not, babies will eat regardless.

Don't bother doing a Masters in a nursing related area if you want to stay on the wards and have your pay reflect your expert knowledge. At least not in East Anglia MH trusts (why I moved to London trust). Even if they have encouraged you to do that Masters. Bastards.

Do not take your speed boat to the Isle of Wight in November. It is Not fun!

Definitely don't go to Rome when there are riots and the city is full of police barricades.

Don't go to the Hand and Flowers in Marlow. The service is poor and they use waaaay too much salt.

Don't bother reading The Husband's Secret. It is rather obvious what he did in the first chapters of the book.

But BLW is fab! It only takes 2 mins to wipe the floor and you don't have to batch cook or puree things.

I wouldn't bungee jump
wish I'd skipped reading the Lovely Bones and What to do about Kevin
the only film I walked out of at the cinema was The Talented Mr Ripley
agree if you aren't gripped by a book don't waste your time with it

Dont:

Go to Madeira
Go to Paris
Go to Leicester Square (I'm a Londoner and it fills me with guilt that poor innocent tourists actually make a point of visiting that cesspit of pointlessness)
Read anything by Ian McEwan
Watch any TV talent show or The Apprentice
Get in any form of motorised vehicle in China. Their roads are f*ing mental.
Jump off anything high.
Climb up anything high enough to be scary.
Go to a festival (other than lovely tiny quiet ones).

I agree with whoever said about Blackpook but Rhyl is WORTH a visit for the sheer mindboggling awfulness.

Choc

no, I wouldn't bungee jump either.

and I say hat as someone who used to do parachute jumping and loved it!
(never tandem though, that's for tourists!)

"The whole of America is boring
All art is pointless"

Wow. Generalisation or what?

Don't do anything you are so disinterested in doing that you have to put it on a bucket list to make yourself do it. Just do what you want to do.

don't ever be on reality televisions. EVER.

I obviously meant television - dang iPad :)

Don't have tea at the ritz. Go in, have a look around and then go home and make yourself some tea and save yourself a whole load of money. Or spend it at The Wolsely instead

errol

I meant for doing the helium voice!

meant for doing the helium voice!

oh, well you can use it for that after it's had its car journey.

Don't leave the budgie cage door open and the toilet seat up when you go to bed

Don't bother getting a pet, any pet; they die.
Don't bother with Gaudí's Sagrada Familia in Barcelona, I don't call it The Eyesore for nothing (sorry, repeating pp), go round the Cathedral instead. (definitely don't go round the crypt to see Gaudí's tomb or you'll get locked in. Bastards).
Don't go to Luton. Ever.
Don't eat one of those huge fuck-off meals just so you can have it for free and get your photo on the wall.
Don't go to Margaret Mitchell's house in Atlanta. Dull as arseholes may have written that in the visitors' book
Don't go looking around Roman ruins, they're just 2,000-year-old housing estates.
Don't buy an Apple iphone5-whatever number, it's just a phone.
Don't stay up really late to see that cult film people Empire magazine always rave about, you'll only fall asleep on your Cadbury's Cream Egg

I really liked The Husband's Secret!

Has anyone mentioned ten pin bowling? Does any adult actually enjoy ten pin bowling with other adults??

don't go on stupid pointless nature trails with your husband and push the buggy.
make him do it
especially up the stupid paths with all the steps that ends with a pissy waterfall.

or just don't bloody go in the first place.

toolate

yes. I love tenpin bowling, partially because the first time I went to play it with a group of friends I met DH!

so it's kind of our thing.
and it's great fun!

Don't go to Rekyavik, it's about the size of an English market town, but with hellishly expensive jumpers.

don't make jam. you can buy jam.

Neither Eat, Pray, Love nor the new Bridget Jones.
Don't start smoking: It's a bugger to stop.

don't read "The woman who went to bed for a year"

it's horribly depressing. just don't