oth my DH's grandmothers left thieir children- FIl and MIl. MIL was left with her Father who promptly put her and sister into a cre home for a lengthy but unspecified time, before removing her and 'allowing' her to skivvy for him. We don't know for sure why Mils' mother (from hereon gil- grandmother in law) but maybe GIl found out that her Husnband had fathered children by eight other women in their small town. we'll never know for sure if it was that (she may have never known) or something else as she passed away a few years ago, and although MIl met her they never got on and Dh never had the chance to met her. MIl has a very odd personality- very cold, dismissive, rude, always fueding with people. Has disowned Dh as a result of his mariage to me, and her marriage ened after 35 years partly due to her coldness.
FIL was a very different story- we have no real clues about his father, although we know that 'you wouldn't want to know' (according to FIl's adoptive aunt- er yes we would like to actually) nd we do know that there were a lot of american GI's based nearby. Add in their dark colouring and Aunt's racism, and we do think aqn Amewrican non caucasian airman MIGHT have been in the equation
Likewise FIL's mother- all weknow about her is her surname, roughly area of domicile, and that she was prepared to dump Dh alone as a todller to fend for himself. nice.
Fortunatley, FIl was takenhome by a nurse at his care home and adopted by her mother- he adores his huge and close family and considers himself lucky. He is odd in many ways but i doubt they're to do with hs childhood, as a person he is warm butlike MIL he doesn't do family ties- it always falls on Dh to contact him as he gets wrapped up in his life. My family is very different, we dson't ive in each others pockets but you get sesnse of them being there that DH doesn't have, and I feels ure this has its roots in his family history.