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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

5 yr old girl "snatched" in Wales

534 replies

mumblechum1 · 02/10/2012 04:38

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-19795761

Let's all keep our eyes peeled Sad

OP posts:
perceptionreality · 06/10/2012 22:10

Viva - I heard that April's mum told the police who she suspected had taken April the night she reported her missing.

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmm · 06/10/2012 22:12

Tired its not just this, its the JS stuff too.. horrid goings on. Makes you worried for your kids.

Tiredmumno1 · 06/10/2012 22:19

I know things, it seems to be one thing after the other at the moment, it really makes you wonder what kind of world we really live in sometimes, it's all so heartbreaking Sad

difficultpickle · 06/10/2012 22:36

I think the hardest thing for me in this case is how to explain it to ds (8). He saw it on the news earlier in the week and followed it on the nights this week when he was boarding (I'm not sure how but he knew what the current status was when I collected him last night). At the beginning of the week we had a review of stranger danger but today we had a discussion about people we know (not specific people).

How on earth do you lay down the rules of what your dcs can and can't do when possibly they could come to harm at the hands of someone you would trust?

Ponders · 06/10/2012 22:40

bisjo, my kids are grown up now, but from what I remember trying to instil into them when they were younger, & from what others have said this week, you need to steer away fron the "stranger" thing & just make them realise that they must check with you before they go anywhere with anybody - whatever anyone might say to them to try to get them into a car or whatever

difficultpickle · 06/10/2012 22:42

That's the issue though, isn't it? If ds said he was going to go for drive around the block with someone I knew I'd probably say yes, never thinking that that could be the last time I saw him.

VivaLeBeaver · 06/10/2012 22:44

Perception - yes I heard that too, but my point is that maybe they named him after the police said they were looking for someone with a left hand drive car.

Ponders · 06/10/2012 22:45

well, that's true

but

if April had said "I'll just go and tell my mum where I'm going first", who knows...?

poor little love Sad

difficultpickle · 06/10/2012 22:49

True Ponders.

I just pray they find her soon.

perceptionreality · 06/10/2012 23:00

That's exactly the problem isn't it bisjo? I was thinking about how I let my dd go on sleepovers and assume her friend's parents can be trusted. But I don't know them really really well. It's the same with many people.

But I suppose if we stopped trusting everyone, our children would never become independent and would never be able to live their lives.

Toothiepeg · 06/10/2012 23:10

I keep wondering where she might be. I think the water has to be the most likely place and she's so small. My dd is a tallish thin 5 yr old. She really doesn't take up much space at all. This case is haunting me a bit. Her poor mum - will never hold her again. It's unbearable.

difficultpickle · 06/10/2012 23:14

perception I completely agree. It is relatively easy to install a stranger danger understanding into fairly young children. Ds grasped this concept by the time he was 5. However working out whether you can trust people you know is something a lot of adults get wrong so young children really don't have a chance.

I suppose you have to hope and pray that the wider circle of people you share your lives and the lives of your dcs are inherently good.

I remember many years ago a colleague I worked closely with killed his dw and himself in particularly horrible ways. I had spent a lot of time with him immediately prior to his death and I had absolutely no clue what he was planning (it involved lost of detailed planning) or that he would be capable of doing such a thing.

difficultpickle · 06/10/2012 23:14

lots not lost.

LadyBeagleEyes · 07/10/2012 00:18

He's been charged now, and until the trial I would imagine anything we say will be subjudice (sp?).
Personally, i believe the police, this time, know what they know, and any speculation on Mn now will be deleted, and rightly so.
In the statements by the police and the CPS today, they have told the press to take a step back.
I hope they do as the trial could be prejudiced.
Therefore this will be my last post on this.
But, fuck, April's little face will stay in my mind until, and even after she is found Sad

RubixCube · 07/10/2012 09:25

Yep i said this to people on on my networks commenting service about why their post was being deleted as they were moaning and i got thumbed down.They obviously don't know alot about how what they say can affect the trial

Houseworkprocrastinator · 07/10/2012 16:50

The figure for child abduction in the uk is an impossible one to find out. Stranger abduction and parental abduction is all lumped in together also these figures include attempted abduction that was not successful and a 'child' can be anyone up to the age of 18. I did a bit of research into this when I was doing criminology and the best report I could find 'estimated' it was roughly 11 per year successful stranger abductions but even that did not say what age.
This was a couple of years ago so there maybe more information now but I was surprised by the lack of statistics on this subject seeing as it is something that all parents worry about.

NanaNina · 07/10/2012 17:04

Glad we've passed the tagging or not tagging etc. I can't remember who now but someone mentioned that there are 10 children involved, April, the child who was with her, April's sibs and 6 children in the Bridgers family. I thought there were only 2 children in the Bridgers family but regardless of how many they are all going to hugely affected. Presumably the Bridges family are going to have to move well out of the area and the children move schools etc. I know this is of secondary importance to April's disappearance, but it is just something I have been thinking about.

It does appear that April knew the man whose car she got into last Monday night. Someone has said that April was in and out of the Bridges house and recently went to the beach in the car with 2 of his children. I haven't seen that and I am wondering if some of the red tops are adding bits to this story I don't know. IF she did, then of course her DNA would legitimately be in the car and their house. However more forensic evidence has clearly been found.

I think the other thing is that none of us can even begin to understand the mind of a man who (not) necessarily the man who has been charged as he is innocent until proven guilty, abducts a child and kills her. It is way way beyond our understanding, and after a 30 year career in Children's Services LA I have seen some pretty awful treatment of children, but this can almost always be traced back to the fact that the parents have been ill treated as children, they have learning difficulties, mental health problems etc. In fact I have never met a child abuser who is just evil; there is always a reason.

There have been cases of children dying at the hands of their parents (Heidi Kaseeda in Birmingham) and before her Victoria Climbie and others I can't recall. These cases are truly awful but the parents (or aunt in VC's case) I think really do believe that the child has an evil spirit within her and there are church people who confirm this, and encourage the abuse to get rid of the evil spirits.

There have been quite a few cases in the media lately of fathers who are estranged from mothers, killing their children and themself usually. Awful as this is, the motive is fairly clear - he wants to hurt his ex W or P as much as she is hurting him and he knows what will hurt her most. Even paedophiles who are of course predatory and want sex with children - that is awful too, but I wonder why they have to kill the victim too. I can only imagine that this gives them some sort of "kick" - is it a control thing, god only knows.

Sorry about the long post, I am just thinking aloud!

margerykemp · 07/10/2012 18:20

Suzanne Pilley's murderer was convicted without a body.

AlionalovesPan · 07/10/2012 22:14

There is something here as well that prob. needs mentioning.

That is the extraordinary efforts of 'ordinary' people in putting their own concerns aside, and have been getting on with the search effort in horrible conditions, the logistics involved, the discipline required, the supply of food and drink from members of the public to keep the staffs involved able to 'keep going'. Getting wet and cold in a 'hostile environment' can sap energies. Esp. if the outcome is v possibly a grim one.

So a really big Thanks to those individuals and organisations who have, and are doing, so much to work us toward a conclusion.

Tryingtothinkofnewsnazzyname · 07/10/2012 22:20

Yes, definitely Thanks to the search teams. I read the other day that the mountain rescue folks don't get paid for this and don't get expenses either. There was mention of a fund being set up earlier in the week. Perhaps one use of some of any money donated could be to these people who are giving their time and expertise, knowingly losing their own wages by doing so, so that their own families don't lose out too much. I am sure they don't expect any reward for doing it, but it does seem hard on them to actually lose out by helping in the search.

AlionalovesPan · 07/10/2012 22:24

yes the mountain rescue people are invaluable. I live in the Peak District and am aware of the call outs they get. The rest of this effort, it seems, are just local people with an investment in the community and by dint of that in April's family.

AlionalovesPan · 07/10/2012 22:27

Of course police teams and other public servants eg local authority are crucial and so admirable at times like this.

NimpyWindowMash · 07/10/2012 22:28

I can't believe the mountain rescuers are unpaid volunteers. Bless them. What an amazing job they do.

AlionalovesPan · 07/10/2012 22:30

yes Nimpy, it's all unpaid. My next door neighbour is a volunteer. If there is a call, off he goes.

Tryingtothinkofnewsnazzyname · 07/10/2012 22:35

Bankers playing roulette with everyone's money get millions, mountain rescue teams put their hands in their own pockets. It's all wrong.