A pretender for the Burchill crown?

[monkeytrousers]

nice of her to put so much effort into it..

I have two small children and thank God I can work from my home and choose the amount of work I do. Whenever you say, I don't know how people with kids work full time, it sounds partronising, but it isn't. If you don't have a f/t live-in nanny it must be absolutely exhausting and incredibly stressful. I don't think I could cope at all.

I've been thinking about getting a job which entails going outside of the house (currently work from home) and what stops me, is the thought of what on earth I would do in school holidays. There's this perception that once the kids are at school you can go out to work, but as Wordsmith says, childcare options are far more difficult then. It's been difficult enough for me with all the juggling and I have complete control over my hours - if I have a spare 15 minutes I can just pop to my computer and do some work if I want (although usually, I end up on Mumsnet rather than working! ) but if you actually have to go into an office on x day 2 or 3 (or God forbid, 5) days per week, I just don't know how people manage without co-operative relatives who live nearby.

the holidays thing is very possible the fringe benefit of teaching.

I simply don't know how I would cope if my holidays didn't match up roughly with the kids. I can cope with the odd mismatch, iset days etc. I just couldn't get my head round 6 weeks in the summer.

That's what makes me so bloody angry about these kinds of features Caligula. This woman has a national platform and uses it to reinforce misogynus myths about women...as though Corrie doesn't do enough of that on it's own!

It's a typical straw woman construct. There's too bloodly many of them about!

trouble with autism in the 60's HMB was that it was believed to be the mother's fault. Our fave Bettleheim - so the children were removed for their own good as the mother was making them autistic.

Foul, wasn't it1

As if the posr parents didn't have enough guilt/worry etc etc as it was!

TBH I don't think that my cousin is autistic, there was never a diagnosis made.....I realise that might just be a product of the time. He had multiple probelms, was having up to 40 fits a day etc. His was a broad, wide ranging brain damage that affected his ability to move, as well as language. He couldn't respond to any form of language and was profoundly diabled on most aspects of development.

He is quite a distant cousin, and to my shame I haven't thought about him in years. I have no idea if he is still alive....which is dreadful of me. Your posting prompted my memories of him.

HMB, it probably was vaccine damage. The whooping cough can and does cause brain damage. That's not even controversial afaik.

no- he doesn;'t sound autistic- I just meant that ds1 in the 60's would have been taken away iyswim. My aunt used to care for an adult who had been whooping cough damaged- she sounded similar.

That seemed to be the consensus that the time. I'm a bit vague on the facts as I was only a child at the time and my family had zero understanding of anything medical, so all the information was very fragmentary and confused.

It was such a sad case. The whole community got involved with the 'patterning' but it wasn't that helpful tbh. I was helping our 3-4 times a week and it was heart breaking to see

The editor of the Guardian magazine likes the idea of courting controversy on issues like this (well, of course she does). She is delighted to get people talking. I and a friend of mine told her once that we had never come across the vast majority of these social female mother stereotypes that the media harp on about. And even told her that the vast majority of mums we knew were actually, you know, quite nice. You could tell she didn't believe us. It's that sad and deeply unpleasant thing of women attacking women and I don't know why intelligent people do it in such an unintelligent way. I also don;t understand what the Guardian's doing getting its columnists from the Express. what's that all about?

I'm also glad that she clearly thinks her own use of time "productive". and clearly thinks she's not smug. and setting a good example to her own kids. hmmmm get a job that matters dear. (or stay at home)

Ahhh, The Express. That explains it.

And mysogynistic is the right word, isn't it. Plays into the hands of all those who think mothering is a worthless, parasitic skive.

Really crap.

The difference is Burchill was actually witty and could write...
quite a bit of this article makes no sense at all - I mean, "on average" mothers spend 25 hours a week on childcare, so we're all having our nails done the rest of the time?? On average?? What about anyone with a baby or a toddler? I also like the way she writes off all time spent looking after children as "unproductive", thereby insulting not only all parents/grandparents who look after their children but also anyone who works in childcare. And I might just allow myself a small snort at the idea that looking after my child is less productive than the job I did before snort and an even bigger snort at the idea that it is less productive than writing shoddy, misogynistic articles for the Guardian. SNORT

Burchill does seem witty from a distance I'll grant you. But anyone who continually uses the term bourgeoisie is looking for a right smack in the mouth if you ask me (..I know nobody is )

No-one except Julie B - she was begging for it really... she did used to make me laugh, though. Exhibit A
A good partand definitely the most fun partof being a feminist is about frightening men.

its got to only be me that understands the kind of mother she is describing in the article. shes not having a go at all sahms's. shes got a feather up her fanny about rich people parading around using the term SAHM when they clearly are not doing the hard work that the lable SAHM conjures.

I don't personally know anyone like that (not moving in the right circles, obv...) but she does make it a bit of a general rant, e.g.:

"You can't, I suppose, blame someone for grabbing herself an easy ride, should she spot one passing. But you can blame her for being, as they always are, so damned pious about it"

we're all on an easy ride, and we're all pious about it...

Custardo - I do indeed recognise the kind of mums she refers to - but she absolutely does tar all sahms with the same brush (apart from those of a previous generation). She explicitly does that ludicrous totting up of hours and says she does not understand what they ("full-time mums")do with their time (if not spending it in nail bars).

hatstand, I think the fact that she has no children herself may well have something to do with it. People without children genuinely do seem to think you can just put your kids in a box when you are bored with them/should (in their opinion) be doing something more 'productive'.
Work ends at 6pm or 7pm (coming home time for many, many of us) - schools end at 4ish.
Work gives you five weeks holiday, school summer holidays alone are six weeks.
As I said before, parents are supposed to be responsible for so much work - teaching our kids to use a knife and fork (latest rant in the papers), helping them with the HUGE amounts of homework they get from the age of 5 (FIVE!) most of which is utterly impossible for a five or even ten year old to do alone, reading bedtime stories, preparing nutritious home cooked food, walking them to school to avoid polluting the environment/the obesity problem, and so on and so on. Now someone has do all this -children cannot raise themselves. And if the parents cannot do it or do not wish to then they have to pay someone to do it for them. Some people cannot afford it and some people don't want to afford it. I'm afraid that ranting at women won't make 9.30 - 3pm local, satisfying and well paid jobs miraculously appear. I think there are many advantages to women in going to work but also many huge difficulties.

Aloha, can't you submit a counter argument?

hmm, that's a good idea actually, especially as I'm not really a SAHM in the sense of doesn't do paid work so I really am not banging my own drum/being defensive iyswim.

Oh do it, do it, do it please!!!

Well, you'll certainly have more impartiality that she appears to have had.

see i am reading it differently to everyone else. i read it that she meant what do rich women do all day whilst hiding behind this lable of sahm - ...oh yes...theres the upserge in nail salons

thes not making the argument that all sahms have nowt to do and they could all get a job if they wanted too but they are just lazy - thats not it at all

shes talking about another type of person - a pretender to the crown of sahm

imvho