I almost can't bear the state of my house.

[doggiesayswoof]

We have let it get into a real mess and it's steadily getting worse - we seem to be busy all the time (v unusual for me to be on MN because I always seem to be busy) yet we're not getting anywhere

DD and DS share a room which is a tip - toys get pushed to the sides every night hence nothing can be found

Bathroom and kitchen are dirty and cluttered - feels like they need scrubbed floor to ceiling day and we don't have time

Lounge is a tip - clothes drying, piles of unopened post

Our house is very small and we don't have room for decent storage

I vacuumed downstairs this morning and it already looks like it's not been done in a fortnight.

I hate this - I feel tense and stressed all the time and have spent ages with DH thinking about how to plan housework etc but it's the execution that lets us down

DH is SAHP and he is struggling (kids are small) - I cannot condemn him because I know I would be no better

I work FT and am permanently tired, come home every night to mess and laundry and DH really is trying

Have tried flylady and failed. Can't afford a cleaner.

Any hope?

Booyhoo thanks - sounds like a good system. We just can't seem to manage breakfast dishes/making beds/tidying before the school run. DD is out by 7.50 (school bus) then DH gets DS dressed & they go out at about 8.30. He has tried changing it round and washing up before he goes out, but DS gets tired and needs a bit of down time in his pram (because he never sleeps beyond 6am)

Doing dishes with DS grizzling is a headache...

We should have loads of time in the morning because we are all up so early but again I just don't know where the time goes.

I had a thread a while ago moaning about our nightmare mornings

this one'll do , tis yours, after all. or if you want to start a new one, let me know where.

i'm on a different time zone, so let me know what time-(ish) you're up for the challenge and then i'll make sure i log on about the same time-ish with my bag. do you want to race? or log on after your collection?

it is of course essential that the world knows what delights you are finally getting rid of. (at least until you've got the hang of it) and you're not allowed to covet my cast-offs, nor i yours !

charity shop or bin, it's the rule. (unless you have the energy to e-bay, which i, sadly, don't).

i'm very excited! think how lovely it'll be by christmas chez doggie and mad's! that can be our goal

ROFL - love the idea of posting the contents of charity bags - talk about navel-gazing

I would say about 8pm UK time would be good for me. Enough time to get kids to bed then get ready with a bag. I would probably fill a bag first then log on when my 10 things are firmly in it!

I'll aim to post on this thread at 8ish tonight

see you later! no cheating!

my 10 items:

charity bag - 1 pair tap shoes, 1 reversible (no less) bodywarmer thingy, 1 denim jacket, 1 pr black cords (all kids), 1 xylophone, 1 bob the builder puzzle, 1 wiggles dance mat.

(i was going to de-toy, lol, but got a bit side-tracked...)

bin - stuffed toy crocodile pencil case (i couldn't wish it on anyone else), hideous green and orange timer toothbrush holder, 1 single tumble drier ball...

tomorrow, i'm going to investigate the contents of the ironing pile - some of it has been there for so long that the dcs must have outgrown it. if i actually iron some of it tonight, i might get that corner of the living room back

we are having our kitchen ripped out on thursday (rental place) so will be living without a cooker or sink for 2 weeks - so wednesday i will be decluttering my kitchen completely in a totally ruthless fashion, and moving it all down to the basement...

so, the plan here is tomorrow's bag to be a clothes charity bag, and wednesday to be kitchen claggage... not sure what i'm going to do with it yet - fairly certain most of it will need skipping. i've got piles of stuff on top of the fridge etc...

as i will be hovering nervously in the background on thursday and friday whilst the builders move in, i can do a couple more bags upstairs in the dc's bedrooms. the good thing about being off work is that i can probably get rid of a few things without them noticing! they are all here on wednesday though. i can see the kitchen happening after they are in bed!

apols for posting a little earlier - remembered i need to get to the post office before it closes! (we are seven hours behind uk) will be back in about an hour to enjoy the fruits of your labours. by that point you should both be safely back on the sofa with a bag tucked by the back door .

bit early for vino here, but at least you'll feel you've made a start and earned yours tonight!

My dcs get upset at giving stuff away though sometimes it works if they want to spend their money on something special and I insist they choose something to give away - its important they understand that space is not limitless.

But I have 3 categories of toy clutter

1. they like it (and may even play with it!) but I hate it so off it goes when they're not looking. Mousetrap (evil game) went this way recently but not much falls into this group.

2. They do not play with it and most likely do not even know it exists. This goes straight out without them knowing.

3. They are aware of it and play with it occasionally but have e.g. outgrown it, got something very similar etc. This stuff goes into temporary 'holding' in the garage. Then if they ask for it, I say 'its in the garage' and they either pester me to get it and I bring it back into circulation or they forget again. Stuff that's been in the garage for a few weeks without being requested gets charity shopped. This method isn't great in the decluttering stakes because the stuff is still there longer but it prevents me making a hideous wrong call.

Lol at madwoman and op. OP, thanks for your thread.

I have 2 bags now ready and waiting for the refugee centre tomorrow. Even dd1 (5) got into it - she has cottoned on quick that we need to make space in good time for Father Christmas

I am really glad that this thread is a Good Thing for other people - it started off as a bit of a self-indulgent moan

My charity bag:

10 paperbacks - including unused cookbooks, some v out of date pregnancy books and some chick lit that's been on its way out of the house since just after I was in hospital last September

Bin:

One flashing butterfly wand type thing which has half of one wing broken off and is possibly quite sharp and dangerous (it does have a lot of sentimental value for DD so I am praying she doesn't notice its absence)

A bag of almost empty bottles of cleanser, toner, hair products etc which are so ancient I would never use them

I think I will do clothes tomorrow and more toiletries on Wed. Want my bedroom to be calm again.

See you tomorrow madwoman - I may not get back on tonight, off to eat and have wine

sounds like a brilliant start!

...and you have inspired me to do likewise with bathroom/ bedroom pots and bottles. i'm sure we don't really need those half empty hotel thingys that dh insists on leaving around for months untouched? an easy win, i think!

i'm not sure i'm ready to part with any books though... i might start with magazines and those flaming catalogues that boden send me every other day... although i did let dd2 use a fatface one for scissor practice the other day...

catch up with you later!

lol well done

well ds gets to tidy a tub with me and he gets to choose what to give to poor children with no toys and what to keep

anything under bed not played with for ages or in another room i just remove i do his room when not there then we do our tub together and then when he is in bed we do living room and whatever is not played with or still played with but out grown goes

after every b day and x mas we will go through i like most toys to have been kept a yr rather than 6 mths as dont feel its long enough but if starts over flowing we will move some on to others friends etc free cycle charity shop

Two rooms i try to keep tidy are the living room and my bedroom. If I wake on a morning to a clutterfree bedroom, I feel more able to face the cleanin. Ive moved now though so its quite easy atm to keep on top of things.
Also agree with toy tidy as soon as dcs are in bed.

knickers, I totally agree about the bedroom - ours has really got out of control recently and it is so depressing to see it last thing at night and first thing in the morning. So that will be my focus first, then the living room, then the DCs' room I think.

I agree madwoman - toiletries are easy! I recently discovered a box full of partly used stuff, including make up, under our bed from when we moved in over 5 years ago - that all went straight in the bin (why do I keep them? why? why?

Bubblagirl that is a good idea - get most of the unused toys out while they are asleep but go through some of the stuff together. I'm going to try doing some decluttering with DD at the weekend. (I like the sound of your tubs!!!)

nellyup -

I am nodding with approval at your 3 categories of toy clutter. that could definitely work for us.

well doggie reading this yesterday has inspired me to start decluttering in earnest today, starting with a cupboard top that has been driving me mad for months, so thank you for starting the thread!

Has inspired me too! I like the 10 items a day thing and will try and join you tonight if that's ok?

I have a pile of stuff that just needs a little bit of fixing then it will be fine but it never gets fixed then the broken bit gets lost but I hate throwing things in the bin. I have a Buzz lightyear whose head fell off about 18 months ago........actually it's more like 2 1/2 years ago . I kept meaning to glue the head back on - looked like a straightforward job and now I've lost its head! Bin? Also, Woody started falling apart too but ds would kill me be very cross with me if I tried to bin him - he still loves him despite only having one foot/boot and the stringy-thing not working!

will be a little bit late tonight but will post! (time zone issue lol - tis lunchtime here and been out all morning at school remembrance day service - gotta grab my bag now!)

you are all doing brilliantly - skim-read the thread - how fab that a few of us are keeping doggie company! (i may have to call you 'woof' though - i'm not sure i feel quite right calling you 'doggie' ...)

i'll assume you are all too busy drinking wine decluttering to post

i was utterly unenthralled by the laundry pile, so went with:

charity shop - 1 pr middle aged greige camping shorts (you can see why i got rapidly bored with that - not enough stamina)

bin/ recycling - a foot high stack of magazines and catalogues (although i did keep a white company one for tidy house porn inspiration), an assorted collection of half-used shampoo/ moisturiser/ toner/ miracle hair serum (no, didn't work) etc etc.

i also collected all the hair bobbles i could find (bathroom, hall floor, every available surface) and put them in a pot on dd1's shelf. get me!

so, how you doin'?

are there more of us now? doggie/ lollipop/ mogs?

anyway, have a pleasant evening ladies - catch you tomorrow!

love love LOVE this thread. Am so enthused that I have started to de-clutter my freezer and am eating some B&J cookies and cream ice-cream and a blackberry and apple crumble is in the oven. Marvellous! Also just about to re-cycle an empty bottle of wine (can you tell?!!!) (madwomen, are you impressed I can multitask!?!!) and am gonna get to it tomorrow with a bin bag, bleach and duster!

Love MN, love this thread, good luck all!

thebfn that is brilliant!! Eating your clutter - inspired.

Mogs you're welcome to join My DD is like you - nothing broken can be thrown out...

madwoman call me woof if you wish! Was a spur of the moment name when I chose it and it has just stuck - so I don't mind what people call me

Your toiletries and hair bobbles bonanza sounds v satisfying. I have not done my bag today - day of work then choir rehearsal and I'm just home - so I'm off to eat my dinner. I'll do two tomorrow though!! I know in my head what I'm going to get rid of...

Booyhoo - HOW do you only do three loads of washing a week???

You said towels and sheets, one load, so do you have a mahoosive machine? I can just, if I squeeze, fit in all sheets from our bed, but not the dcs too, and definitely not towels as well.

Would LOVE to only have three loads a week!

the bfn - my top tip to you is DON'T EAT THE BLEACH AND DUSTER! but the rest of it sounds very satisfying

mogs - buzz must go. buzz must go. buzz must go. hallowe'en is over. no headless children's toys allowed...

doggie - two bags tomorrow! 20 items of sheer wondrousness to be dispatched!

as for me, tomorrow is Kitchen Day. it's an 'everything must go' moment. gulp.

and there will be children underfoot. i am going to try the imminent arrival of santa and the necessity for space line, too, but suspect they will just bicker over the rubble... ho hum. to work!

I switched 'puter off at 8 then remembered I needed to email ebay buyer so I'm back on for 5 mins.

I'm feeling totally sorry for myself this evening (for no apparent reason) and really can't be bothered to do anything - but I am going to the charity shop tomorrow with 8 carrier bags of not-sure-what that have been gradually building up for the last few weeks. Also, I made a big effort to tidy the kitchen before I came upstairs so not only am I going to get to bed before midnight but I'll be getting up to a tidy kitchen.

I might do tomorrow's bag of 10 during the day because I am often fit for nothing past 7pm.

Night!

Lots of good advice here.

This may sound harsh but your DH really just needs to get on with it! If it was me, I would expect him to be pretty much on top of everything otherwise what is the point of him being at home? We manage it and we both work full time without outside help.

This is a really good book:-
www.amazon.co.uk/Tomorrow-Other-Secrets-Time-Management/dp/0340909129/ref=sr_1_1?ie=U TF8&s=books&qid=1257896976&sr=8-1

RTM is brilliant too:-
www.rememberthemilk.com/

Is he happy at home? Maybe you would be better off if he went to work and you employed someone (childminder, nanny, cleaner, ironing lady or whatever).

Anyway, just a different perspective for you to think about. No offence intended!

well its only my bed and ds1's and a cot sheet. plus we reuse our towels a good few times before washing them. so i would use 2/3 towels a week, ds's maybe 3 same between them, they dont bath everynight and they share a towel. i have a 7 kg machine.

My trip to the charity shop has been cancelled!! I was all enthusiastic about it too. I might ask my friend to take the stuff for me. I hate asking people to help but it's getting me down being surrounded by so much crap!

I'm off to fill a bag or 2. I might have to re-read the thread first because I'm not exactly sure what the bag filling rules are.........