Decluttering at the speed of life

[Sallygoroundtheroses]

The follow on from www.mumsnet.com/talk/housekeeping/4709904-im-doing-the-31-day-declutter-challenge?page=21&reply=123534967 as we go into February and maybe beyond. We are no longer doing the numbers challenge but chucking, recycling, regifting and reselling the clutter in our life.

*The title is a nod to Dana K White, someone who has helped me declutter.

@BrutusMcDogface I've got a cupboard full of old notes and resources that I struggle to get rid of. I'm not even teaching at the moment but every time I try to tackle them, I fall down because I think I might need them to remind me how to do the job if I go back to the classroom! (That's in the parallel universe, where I'd actually have the time to read them 😂)

@Bemyclementine I'm glad you like it!

I love Dana. She does say the same things over and over again but I think that's what's needed. I love the ones later on where she goes through the process with people, it's lovely to hear about their progress and I even teared up at one yesterday while painting again.

There's an online course you can do where she works with two other decluttering type people, she has books and you can be a patron where you get access to a Facebook group which sounds really supportive.

It's made me realise that I'm not a full slob but I listen anyway as she is so engaging. Plus I always know where my nail clippers are now.

Inbox now down to 398. From over 12,000 a few weeks ago......

I've gone through my wardrobe & have a bag to go to the charity shop tomorrow, just cleared out the Tupperware & water bottle cupboard & that's another bag gone. A friend was collecting dog leads/collars/toys to take with her to a cypress rescue when she visits next so she also received a carrier bag full of bits for dogs.
I really need to tackle under my bed but I keep getting distracted by other areas. We've only got a small 2 bed bungalow so it always looks cluttered up

I need to get better at getting stuff gone. I had 3 lots in the car, clothing bank, charity, rspca. I took the clothing bank yesterday znd should have taken charity bags today but didn't.

@CornedBeef451 I've started at the beginning, is there a way to pick up where you leave off?

Placemarking. Seeing this on my TIO will keep giving me a little poke.

@Bemyclementine on my iPhone it saves where you are so if I go back to the podcast I can just pick it up where I left it.

I sort by oldest to newest and then filter on unplayed and it shows any you haven't listened to and any part played ones.

A quick cull of 100 photos off my phone. I need to tackle the videos on it, there’s hundreds that can probably go.

I follow the Organised Mum Method for cleaning and so it was kitchen day on Friday and I cleaned out three cupboards. I was really annoyed with myself as three tins of food we had clearly bought in the pandemic but did not eat had gone past their sell by date. What a waste to throw them out because we had not cleared the cupboard regularly. We don’t overbuy food and this has really annoyed me. I guess as a consequence of having to much stuff in other areas that I need to deal with I’ve overlooked this. Anyway I’ll be making sure I check the dates on tins and jars regularly.

@Sallygoroundtheroses it's so easy to do though isn't it? Over lockdown we had tins of things we never usually eat because we couldn't get our normal food.

We finally got through it all but I did have to be really careful about stock rotation, particularly as we had a tiny kitchen so a few extra tins had to go under my bed plus the accidental misunderstanding of just how big 5kg bag of pasta would be!

Before we moved I went through DH's enormous collection of spices. It was impossible to keep them in order as he'd just open a new bag every time he needed some so the cupboard was full of big half used bags, some expired, so many half used jars, unlabelled containers it just went on and on.

I had a good sort out and he's a bit better now but mainly because he's buying from a new place where everything comes in big tubs but the spice jar drawer is a mess. I might give that a go again today.

I also need to try to use up the packet mash I bought for DDs Duke of Edinburgh expedition but not sure anyone can stomach it!

Just read through the thread, it is really inspiring me. I’m decluttering over the long term. I have 3 young children and child free time is thin on the ground so it’s taking a while.

A couple of months ago I went through all my old cds stored in the cellar, keeping about a third of them. Some of them had started developing spots of mould. It really made me realise that storing stuff “just in case” results in it deteriorating in quality. I told myself that those cds deserve better, to be used by someone who wants them and it was a powerful justification for donating the ones that hadn’t perished. I am now using this argument to pass on usable stuff (that I don’t actually use) rather than holding on.

Today I went through the drawers on my dressing table and threw out some old and broken jewellery, make up etc. I saved some of the old stuff for DD to play with. It was only a small bag but plenty of stuff in there.

Our garage really needs a good clear out but that will probably have to wait until the dc are older.

I sold a piece of sport equipment that has probably been in a cupboard or attic for 30 years. I like the concept that these things deserve to be used.

Not sure if this is in the spirit of this thread but, anyway, what do you do if you are a good de-clutterer yourself and you make decisions for the DC on what to keep, but if your other half is a hoarder? He won't let me go through his stuff and won't do it himself.

It’s a tricky one. Are we talking about sentimental clutter or stuff that needs fixing (and never does) or “things that might be useful one day” or some sort of collections?

For the things that might be useful- could someone else in the family make use of them? I gave my mum some kitchen stuff like tart cases etc that she sorted through before it went to charity. All useful stuff, just not to me right now in my life (I worked out it had been over 5 years since I baked a tart). Are the useful things deteriorating with underuse, see my argument above. If we get rid of this spare screwdriver/cable can it be replaced? At what cost?

Can you agree to “quarantine” some stuff that isn’t being used with an agreement to dispose of in 6 months if it isn’t used?

It's clothes mainly and things like old suitcases and laptops. If I ever suggest he goes through his clothes he gets defensive as if it would be an insult. He's happy to put things 'in the loft' which is code for 'don't want to have to decide what to do with it'. I think you shouldn't put things in the loft unless you're prepared to get it out and take it with you to your next house.

I agree about the loft but it has one advantage, stuff in the loft doesn't need to be moved everytime you vacuum , if it is put into labelled and dated boxes in loft at some point you can say we haven't needed anything in this box since 2019 I think it can go, also out of sight out of mind, if he keeps gpoing to attic for a thing then he is usuing it, but i bet it stays in loft unused and for your sake it is not in your face on a daily basis making the place look messy

@CornedBeef451 there is no need to get rid of tinned stuff it is just a best before date it is probably ok for years afterwards, however if the reason it is in cupboard is because you don't like it there is no point in keeping it, there are whole websites devoted to selling food past the best before date ( not use by date) sell by dates are only for shops they have no impact on edibility of product

I see putting things in the loft as hoarding. Things you rarely need eg Christmas tree or camping gear, fine. Everyday items shouldn't be there though. 33goingon64 in my place those things would be decluttered by me. Annoying to do but saves any arguments. I find if people put things down and leave them there an extended period of time without using them it's because they no longer need it and won't miss it if it's gone. It's wasteful to leave things in the loft then later hire a skip to dispose of them, when if you'd disposed of gradually by selling, donation, recycling or bin then you wouldn't ever need a skip. Instead of arguing over those old laptops, sell them on the sly and have a family day trip out or weekend away for you and DH with the money. I know it goes against every rule of decluttering but it works for me. We don't have room to store junk. I'm a bit of a clutterbug myself (all useful stuff and tidy) so if we kept the not-useful too we'd have no room to move. Anything he put in the loft pre-summer 2022 and hasn't got back out yet I'd say is safe to dispose of.

Thanks @Cottagecheeseisnotcheese . I would have taken it to a food bank if it was in date so I just assumed no would want it, that’s really good to know I can try other ways.
@33goingon64 my other half has a lot of stuff. I’d love to go through it but he would notice. His parents were very nearly actual hoarders, like you couldn’t open the door to some rooms. Him seeing me going through things and letting him know that the less stuff we have the quicker we clean and then can do more fun things or just relax has made him make a start on his stuff. Our living room is knots totally clutter free and he did that, so there’s hope for everyone if we did it!

Knots=now

@Cottagecheeseisnotcheese we did get through it in the end through sheer bloody mindedness but had some very odd meals.

Luckily I just have one packet of powdered mash, need to check the date and donate if it's still ok.

Feeling overwhelmed today. One of my kids had a birthday in the week and we have acquired a lot. I had got rid of
so much but here I am wondering where stuff will go. Lots is arts and craft, not just plastic so eventually it will go.
I need to accept some clutter with small children and a small house don’t I ? Perhaps I’ll set a mini challenge to rethink some of the toys I kept just before Christmas.

@Bellaisoneluckywoman @Sallygoroundtheroses
Can I pull up another chair and join the gang? I also hang onto things thinking they could come in useful. Feeling very pleased with myself today. Gave my daughter two books to use as part of a hobby a couple of months ago and she told me today I could have them back. I declined and was happy for her to put them into the charity shop. Decided they had left the house and I wouldn't bring them back on. You have no idea what a big step forward that was for me.

Sally you could do one-in-one-out? Decide whether the new presents are more valuable to your DC than their current toys. Just because something is a gift it doesn't mean you have to keep it. You don't have to accept having more things than your home can realistically accommodate

Today I have sorted through the pile of CDs sitting in my hall that I wasn’t sure what to do with. I kept 3 or 4, put about 15 in a bag along with a few other bits and took a walk to the charity shop stopping at the clothes recycling en route, dropping off a couple of bits there. They’ve been there for months so that’s progress. My mum is going to take my spare iron off my hands. I have toddler twins so it isn’t trivial to take big bags to the charity shop whilst wrangling two little ones, but if I can take a couple of small bags on a pushchair walk it all helps.

I’ve also listed some assorted unopened ear plugs on Olio that I bought ages ago. I felt too guilty to put them in the bin when they’re perfectly usable and sealed.