KONDO Thread 9

[Iqueen]

Kondo your Home and your Life. Live the JOY!

I was up early this morning tidying kitchen cupboards (something must be wrong with me!) and have managed to rearrange and streamline everything as well as throw out tons of out of date food that I didn't even realise I had. Husband thinks I've got a bit crackers because ordinarily I hate anything cleaning related but now I've started I can't stop- so addictive! We're going for another round of IVF later on this month and I'm channeling all my anxiety/general nervousness into sorting out the house which is strangely soothing. Tomorrow I need to tackle the box room which is a dumping ground for all sorts of rubbish and once it's sorted I've decided I'm going to turn it into a little dressing room

Evening all. This week is the first time I've had a concentrated time off work for a while. I've been getting jobs done of all sorts but also spending quite a bit of time resting and browsing mumsnet . I've totally cleaned the bathroom ( even washing down walls) and have now finished the bedroom too, removing some things that didn't spark joy and also putting up a small "invisible" shelf for books above a bedside table. This is sparking joy as I love the way it looks and it is leaving the bedside table that much clearer.

I'm realising something though. Although I am getting rid of some stuff and I'm more ruthless that I would have been a while ago, I'm actually quite scared of getting rid of stuff and I don't really know why! I'm resisting getting rid of some non joy sparking items, but I don't know why I'm feeling such resistance!

Has anyone else experienced this or got any thoughts about it?

Happy new year,everyone. I am currently trying to write my vision statement and it basically sent me into a panic attack. Argh.

Then I put the Christmas decorations away and things started to feel a little better.

Educating I am the same and I put it down to how I was brought up, we were quite broke and I was taught to be careful with money and never throw anything out that could be reused. All well and good but nowadays everything is so cheap that I can buy something new from Primark for a few quid, and I end up buying new but also keeping the old yet technically still usable things out of guilt and fear that one day I will be too poor to buy anything and will be glad of my old, holey socks.

I was also up early continuing with clothes and later sorted bags. Shoes and toiletries next. Tell me what do you imagine day to day clothes, while on maternity leave, that spark joy look like? As it is I have a beautiful pink silk summer dress and a delicate reiss white shirt as my joyfultthings. .. and then I wore a tracksuit and milk stained bf top for the day

pinkheels best of luck with ivf
.. you might be turning it into a nursery!

Mikado the clothes which currently give me the most joy are ones which are comfortable, have easy boob access, and don't show baby vomit

I am still loving my granny pants and stretchy maternity jeans too.

Thanks mikado- I've spent the last 4 years hoping we'll be able to turn the box room into a nursery but sadly Ivf hasn't been successful in our previous attempts. Fingers crossed for the next go. Regardless of the outcome I feel oddly positive about doing something else with a room that is currently a bit unloved and creating a room that sparks joy!

Fingers crossed for you Pinkheels. Sounds like Kondo is just the thing you need. It's supposed to change your life and bring new beginnings so who knows?! Xxx

Nomore - why does your dressing gown not give you joy? I have one towelling dressing gown I've had for 24 years now, and Kondo made me see I wanted one just like it only a more cheerful colour.

Two packs of Dylon later I love it to bits! I also have a thin black one for summer/looking elegant.

I have a few strappy vests for under clothes - I figured the max number I needed given the existence of washing machines, and kept my favourites, which handily are very thin - couple are pure silk now with holes in but lovely to wear.

Today: the plastic box collection. And one week until the lodger is Kondoed! We will get on much better after that, as right now we're in danger of not staying friends.

I live in part of London where many people are skint and bags of random food and opened toiletries are snapped up on Freecycle - I just leave them on the doorstep and they vanish.

Pinkheels The dressing room sounds lovely! It will surely be sparking joy for ages! I now want a dressing room

NotCitrus Can I ask how you went about with the Dylon? I have a towelling gown that I really like comfort and fabric wise, but I've never liked the colour. I've never used Dylon before but had been thinking about it and your post has prompted me!

I Kondoed the fridge freezer! Have to revisit the cupboards, I'm quite good with them generally (as our kitchen is tiny so every inch counts!) but I know I've left stuff in there that I will never use, just because I felt bad to get rid.

Did shoes and thanks to the lovely folding I have a drawer which fits my handbags. However no idea where to keep rucksacks, this has always been an issue. Might be in a pullout box under the bed?

I never did do my books, DVDs and CDs. I want to kondo my kitchen drawers. They would frighten you. They are all Komono drawers. I have 3 'komono' drawers. What's this, where'll I put it.

good article in the telegraph

this woman spent a year doing it. i can't believe she threw out her straighteners!. I had two straighteners and I chucked the cheaper ones. She said that was her only regret in a year though. encouraging. She realised/remember as she was getting ready for her christmas partyy!

I dylon'd our bath towels, they were a horrid colour after going from a yellowy beige to a gross pinky beige. They are now a medium brown colour (the Dylon was chocolate brown if I remember).

DS's new bedroom is almost done so soon I will be able to Kondo his drawers as I transfer things to his new room. We just kondoed his books together and it seems a 3yr old can Kondo! I asked "which ones do you love and want to keep?" and he has discarded about a third which will make bedtime easier as he chooses his story. He has said the baby can have the discarded third (he hasn't read the bit about not giving discarded items to family)!

For all you Kondo fans there is a long article about her + interview in today's Saturday Times magazine (02/01/16)

Times is behind a pay wall so I don't think you'll get it on line.

Bedunk if your item is mainly cotton or other natural fibre, weigh it, then buy as many packs of Dylon as needed - probably 2 or 3 for a dressing gown, though can always 're-dye if it's not bright enough. Buy the packs where you have to buy salt separately - I'm told the new ones with salt included aren't so good and certainly you don't want to pay the premium when salt is about 25p for a bag in a supermarket!

You need a front-loading machine, then it tells you what to do - start with clean clothes that can be wet, put dye and salt in the back of the machine (wear rubber gloves and no precious clothes!), wash then do another wash and then use the machine for a dark load to be on the safe side, and then it's fine for whites again. Old grey gown is now regal purple! I dye black clothes about once a year to make them properly black again - they look almost new and I don't have to go shopping! Though I did get a viscose/polyester top once that was so soft when I was pregnant with sensitive skin and it was £5 in the M&S sale as it was hideous - peach and pink stripes. I hoped I could make it different shades of purple but the dye didn't take well and it looked like vomit. Used it for 2nd pregnancy then off to the textile bin with it!

Have just done the plastic box collection. All unmatched lids and boxes are in the recycling, others are paired and ready, and half a dozen given to ds who says he needs them to tidy his room. I suspect this means merely more open containers with Lego strategically placed around the floor, but nice to encourage him...

Packets of spices have gone into jars and been labelled, and generally sorting old kitchen cupboards as contents move to the other end of the room temporarily is going well.

The only thing I vaguely regret getting rid of in the last year is Lego ice cube trays, but they didn't make very good ice bricks and always looked dusty. I have more fun ice cube trays.

Did some old paperwork from work - probably keeping more job applications and CVs than MK would, but I may well apply to the same people again soon! Like someone upthread, I got a promised pay rise last year only because I'd kept every payslip and pay letter ever and could pull out the ones from 2002 saying certain amounts would be paid separately but still part of base salary (so should be included when calculating X% increase). All my leave sheets and drafts of reports are in the recycling now, minus my staff and NI numbers which are torn off and in the compost caddy! Saves getting the shredder out.

Stiffstink my DD is also 3. I know for a fact that the only item of clothing which brings her joy is her fairy costume. She wears it everyday and cries if it's in the wash!

I have redone my clothes this morning, although I was a bit half hearted about it. I only did the ones which currently fit as I need to try things on and see what they look like before I decide, and I didn't get everything out like you are supposed to, I just got rid of a few tatty cardigans, an old pair of shoes and some holey socks . I am justifying this because my clothes are all folded kondo style already so it's easy to see what I have.

I also had a look through dd's clothes and have sorted a pile of things she never wears to ask her if she wants to keep.

I need to go through my hat, scarf and glove drawer and my bags later then that will be it for clothes.

arti I had a real mental tussle with some stuff, especially a trouser suit I've had since I was 16 (I'm 29. Shh, it still fit.) because it was my 'lucky interview suit' and I couldn't help thinking 'what if I have an interview, and I need a suit?'

Eventually I decided no, girl, get a grip, if you had an interview you'd go buy some interview-appropriate trousers or, better yet, a suit which DIDN'T look like you just rocked up from the early 2000s.

Kondo is of the opinion that we resist getting rid of stuff because of fear for the future/attachment to the past. Which is often true. Then again, sometimes it's fear of the future (what if I have an interview/need a Dalek costume/have no money? Like Snozz said, that last one's a doozy, because you're essentially making a statement that if you need a replacement for the thing you want to discard, you will be able to get one and that can feel like a big leap of faith sometimes) and sometimes it's...unrealistic expectations of the future, IYSWIM?

Like...oh, some day I will be the sort of person who knits again. Some day I will get around to this thing.

Which might be OK for short-term stuff (e.g. somebody moving house isn't going to get around to crafting for a few months but they can't wait to get back to it, someone breastfeeding has kept all their favourite non-boob-accessing tops for when that's no longer a priority in clothing choice) but if it's just 'some nebulous date in the future I will do this again, maybe' then...maybe it's better to give someone else joy of that thing, or let it go entirely, and trust that if you do become that person again, the same thing will happen in reverse?

Someone else will decide to give away their [thing] or sell it for cheap, and it will come to you, and The Circle Of Life Is Complete or something suitably woo like that.

Aaaaand I've written an essay. Oops. I don't even know if that's relevant to you arti, but I hope it's helpful to someone.

Pinkheels, good work on the kondoing, and best of luck with your IVF. I hope the life-changing woo-woo of Kondo works wonders for you.

NoMore, great article! I have previously decluttered a hairdryer which I very occasionally wish for. But the things I've got rid of and then subsequently replaced have been relatively few in number, so it's been working pretty well for me.

I have discarded Yet More Clothes (in a very small bag, the Oxfam shop think I'm a bit weird but it was only about four things) and have bought some new ones as well! Which involved quite literally standing in shops holding things and thinking 'is this making me feel joyful right now?' (Must admit the underwear and vests mostly made me feel joyful because the underwear situation was getting a bit desperate, but STILL. I passed on a perfectly nice pair of earrings after carrying them around for a bit and going 'no...just not feeling it'. I Am Become Kondo, Destroyer of Impulse Purchases, apparently.)

MsUrsa Your post on buying made me particularly lol. I am have issues right now with shopping. I don't do it, basically - for clothes and things I mean, we have plenty of food I spent ages online yesterday looking at lots of nice things in the sale, I add everything I like to my basket and then review. At the end I decided that actually, I'm not really grabbed by anything. So really I just wasted 2 hours! But then, I find things I like, but they might cost more... and I struggle to part with money. So I don't buy joyful clothes and have Kondoed to the point where I have a bit joyful, the rest practical (work would not be impressed if I turned up in trainers and a sweatshirt no matter how joyful!).

I have seen a couple of dresses that I want. Seriously want. Hm.

That's a bit of a tangent! Anyway did DH's clothes, he being master of minimal unless it's electronic, and amazed that we actually had several suits, a t shirt, and a pair of shoes to get rid.

MsUrsa, thank you for your thoughts. I've been going back to reading the book and certain things have leapt out at me. Shecwrites about how we live in the present and to cherish who you are now and that past experiences are of value in how they have shaped who we are now, not in the memories per se. Reading this has too inspired me to get rid of nearly all my old school reports and exercise books. I kept one or two I liked or showed examples of my terrible handwriting as these are useful for showing my students as it can give them confidence that the can go on with learning and succeed! I wasn't terribly happy as a child. Hanging onto these things may a way of somehow hoping I can go back in time and make things alright, which if course I can't! Looking at the reports and books gives me a weird sort of painful nostalgia feeling that is definitely not joy!

We've got the go ahead with our loft insulation grant so we've got 30+years of stuff to sort in the loft.
Four large bags of books and a selection of blasted meerkats going to the charity shop on Monday, already in the car so I'm not tempted to go through them again.
It's only made a small dent in the total clutter but we've got into the groove now.
Still waiting for The Book to be delivered, should've come today!

MsUrsa, that had occurred to me too; the fact that if you throw out someting you are in two minds about, you are assuming that you will have the money to replace it.

It is hard! I managed one drawer today.

Congratulations on the drawer, nomore! Progress!

bedunk, I know what you mean. I think that's part of the reason why my wardrobe keeps getting smaller and smaller. I'm kind of figuring out what it is I really love and have the confidence to get rid of the rest...but then I don't have anything to replace it with because I'm even pickier than I used to be!

I'd say: if you can afford the dresses, get them. If you're anything like me, spending ANY money gives you a bit of a pang, but that just means that you're more likely to eventually spend on stuff that you really do love.

Though sometimes I fall into the 'well these are £5/£15/£50 cheaper and they'll do just as well' trap. Spoiler: they usually don't. Oops.

arti, well done on getting rid of the school stuff! You have inspired me to get back to my stored stuff (not currently possible, but when it is, watch me go...) and go through my photos and notebooks, because...you know, they remind me of happy times, some of them, but also of times when I was young, dumb and stupid, and...really, who needs that in their mental space?

I was that person, I'm not any more, and they aren't making me happy thinking about them, so...eh, why keep them.

MrsUrsa Spot on, too often it's 'Oh but these are on sale and very similar', then never get worn or aren't as nice. I narrowly avoided that yesterday! I did buy 2 dresses They were also on sale but I got ones I actually like the look of and by a brand I like. There is a store near my work so if I don't like them in the flesh it will be easy enough to return. That's the other issue, I do almost all shopping online as it's hard to do in person (lack of time, can't do it with DCs), but sometimes it's seeing it in person that sells it, you can really tell if you like it or not.

Kondoing has helped me uncover 2 lamps that I really like and have been searching for for ages Enjoying them now!

Back to work this week so I think it might be a case of chipping away at things slowly. But at least I got the biggest tasks done. I think we've finished clothing. I have no idea what the order is, still haven't got the book. Must put that on my list...