March of the Fledglings 2015

[Slingclutter]

Heartfelt thanks to Whoknows for running the February thread during such a stressful time for her (and to Toffee for helping out.)

If you are strugging with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support and and along the way.

Flylady link link here.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework, which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

1. start or repeat baby steps

1. repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

1. reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

[And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.]

More info here on getting started and on Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Don't be put off by the purple prose and barf-tastic language of the site - the underlying system is sound!

Three key points to keep in mind:
(1)No perfectionism allowed (this is harder than you might imagine!)
(2)You are never behind; just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
(3) It didn't get into a mess overnight - it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15 mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking lists but don't let that worry you! Do what you can, anything is better then nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!

Oh and don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey – some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, regulars, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome!

Well I enjoyed eating all the forbidden food Swan and am now regretting it of course . Really stupid because I did really well diet-wise at the beginning of the week, faltered horribly in the middle, and totally dive-bombed at the end! So all that beginning-of-the-week effort has been lost. Only managed to keep up MFP for one or two days. And totally embarrassing that I can't sustain a diet even for a mere seven days . Must try and figure out a way to stop myself fleeing to the biscuit tin when stress/irritation strikes. Only thing I have managed to do is keep off the this week even though I was sorely tempted at times.

Certainly hope that Mother's day is not totally submerged under birthday celebrations chez Swan this weekend btw!!! And if it is, here's a virtual for tomorrow!!

As for the secondary school dossier ... argh.... . At the beginning of the week when it was submitted it was all smiles and "we look forward to seeing mini-SC here at "chosen school x". At the end of the week it was, "we need you to come in here this minute because we need extra details because we are mahoosively over-subscribed". Horrible wait until end of May to find out ... . Not nearly as hopeful now.

Chore for computer time sounds very good and direct tit-for-tat consequence/reward Bitchy. We are currently focusing on just four things (1) not procrastinating with hwk ((2) getting gym kit ready for Wed mornings (3) get ready for ballet in plenty of time so that bun can be done in stress-free conditions, as can drive there, (4) putting dirty clothes in laundry panier and not on floor under bed . So far today we have done OK with (1) and totally failed on (4)!! Agree though, if something achieved correctly but very grumpily, it can take the joy out of it. Have to really really steel myself to ignore the grumps; it is hard so you have my total sympathies!!!

Aw bless your five-your-old for wanting to do the laundry PegLeg and long may it continue!!

Oooh thanks for links Blue - much appreciated, and many, many congratulations re: your 2lb weight loss this week!!! (Not easy when you are flat out with work.)

Hope you can have your lie-in later Toffee and hope play-date (hate that expression but still use it!!) goes well!!

Sorry you have been feeling low Greymalkin. You've done very well with your list depite it and see you are still decluttering via Ebay. And no worries about links did I mention that I don't necessarily do them even when I am posting them. If you don't mind me saying so, I'd be feeling very depressed if my dh behaved like that. Hope he bucks up a bit today.

Right, had better poke about and go and try and prepare some healthy food that will satisfy everyone's different requirements. And try and seek a bit of calm now dd is at ballet. I feel awful typing that, but every exchange we have atm seems to include some sort of argument; so I'm walking on egg shells. It is very wearing.

Thanks for the NYANBU, Peg.

DS1 has just run downstairs, looking all happy: his friend says he is coming this afternoon instead. I just hope he keeps his word.

Toffee your DH IBVU. Just because he works and you don't does not mean he gets to opt out of being a parent and taking part in the upkeep of a family and a home. I would be seething in your shoes.

(Don't mean to sound critical, but I feel very strongly about attitudes like this)

Here

x posts

Pegleg just to add to the confusion, Mother's Day isn't until Sun 11 May here!

Toffee so sorry your ds1's friend is a no-show. Must be v. disappointing for him. (Trying to reach for positives; I guess if child in question or their family goes for 'loose spontaneous arrangements' then he can be invited again soon.)

Just for the record (to tell your dh) whenever dh is here, whoever isn't cleaning up after supper, is the one who puts dd to bed (and it's a bit of a task as she is always reluctant and there are lots and ltos of stairs between ground floor and her bedroom!). Also, tell him that it's precisely because he works long hours that he needs to put the boys to bed!! on your behalf!!!

x post!

Can't keep up! Glad ds1's friend coming after all Toffee!!

Have a good Saturday everyone!!

Grey - thanks you, that's what I think too.

SC - DS1's friend is here .

Awesome toffee hope they have fun :)

I am doing too much in the name of keeping sane. Ds is pushing his luck and I am about to hit the roof and be totally unreasonable and demand PJ day comes to an end and he puts some clothes on so we can leave the house.

And now I need a kick in the ass and a reminder about being a perfectionist and not attempting to do everything in one day. If anyone fancies reminding me of my own words...

[Supplies fluffy cushions, cashmere socks, soothing bubble baths (not necessarily in that order!) to Greymalkin and Bitchy]. Hope your days have become increasingly less stressful as they have gone on!

A reasonably calm day here for once. DD is on nearly best behaviour owing to presence of sil. And we have just been pottering about really because sil (understandably) is shattered and not up to doing much atm.

Oh yes and ate too much again . Don't seem to be able to help myself .

Off to bed early tonight, so sleep tight everyone!

Baby-step no. 15 for for Sun 15th is adding bed-making to your morning routine. (Newcomers: fwiw, I've added it to my afternoon routine as I like the beds to have a good airing after use.]]

It's our first day in Zone 3 today (Sunday): the bathroom and one extra room, March 15-21.

If you want to, you can declutter 15 mins a day in this zone!

The detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 3 is here.

No missions because it is the weekend!

The daily focus for Sunday is: renewing your spirit. (Hopefully, with it being Mothering Sunday, someone will be renewing your spirit for you with any luck!!)

The monthly habit for March is the controversial one about getting dressed immediately and wearing lace up shoes indoors etc.

For a summary of the above, see the flight plan : www.flylady.net/c/fp.php?tzm=-120 which should update itself daily.

Happy Mother's Day for Sunday everyone, if you are celebrating it!!

Toffee think I forgot to say thanks for the FB link!

ta da
Unpack tesco when it arrives meh, did the the cold and frozen stuff but the rest is lurking!
2 loads of laundry
Put dry clothes away
Tumble dryer on
Wash bra
Remind DCs to put tent and train track away

Ah well I did most of it. Found today quite tiring as DD's friend ended up round here. Was worth it though as it's being reciprocated next week!

DD has been spectacularly clingy the last few days. I mean she's been like that for ages but much worse this week. I keep worrying how the decision to home ed is affecting her - I left her to make up her own mind (even though I absolutely think she will be happier in the long run, as she gets so overwhelmed by school) but I know she was worried about missing school. I know DS is absolutely chuffed to bits but every time DD is upset I worry (silently!) that she is going to ask to go back :( but it's not happened. She's not actually mentioned school other than "we don't have to go woop woop!" type stuff, but she is very emotional ATM so I think the change has really taken its toll on her :(

I think I've been doing my to do/ta da lists slightly differently from others here so I might change that tomorrow!

It's fine to do lists however works for you, PegLeg

Hope DS1 and his friend had a good time, Toffee, and that you can kick your DH into gear!! I did also end up buying myself flowers, but the boys chose some for me too. And I did the grocery shopping, so I got various things that I fancied and told DH that he's cooking them tomorrow!

Bitchy, the chores app is an Android one. There are lots of kid-friendly ones too, with stickers, rewards etc which I might investigate for the boys at some stage.

Grey Hope your day improved. Sounds v familiar about running on empty and consequent shouting. There's a thread over in parenting for people trying to break that kind of cycle if it's any help.

We've had a very productive but un-Fat-Fairyish day here. Roped the whole family in, despite much moaning from the boys, and between us we got a lot done. Also ended up with the boys arguing over whose turn it was to wield the hoover or feather duster!!

Ta da!
Laundry x2 done and dried
Laundry x3 put away
Grocery shopping done and put away
Boys' library books returned and WBD tokens spent
Arranged Mothering Sunday flowers
Cleaned kitchen
Cleaned bathroom
Tidied hotspots
Tidied boys' bedroom
Culled baby toys from bedroom
Thorough dusting everywhere
Hoovered whole house
Mopped hard floors
Rehomed or binned various random oddments

We did also manage to play some games together and have a nice story time too, so there was also family fun. :)

DS1's friend stayed till the evening and ate lunch and dinner with us. It all seemed to go really well. Am so pleased.

Actually had a surprisingly productive day. Felt much more energetic today, so made the most of it.

ta da

Swished and swiped in bathroom
To chemist to pick up prescriptions
Hoovered all the main rooms upstairs and down
Room rescue in sitting room and hall
Put out two bags of rubbish plus recycling
Washing up
Cleared out litter tray
Walked into town to buy fish and chips for lunch
Washing up
Nap
Put away Ocado order
Put my Mother's Day flowers in a vase and ate my chocolates
Half an hour's ironing
Put ironed clothes away
Made dinner
Bath and hairwash for DS2
Shared Prosecco with DH whilst watching 'The Good Wife'

Noticed that DS2 had made me a card for tomorrow, so I will be getting something after all this year .

Hope everyone has a happy Mother's Day tomorrow. (And that your twins have a happy birthday, Swan).

Thank you blue I just realised people might think I was being more efficient than I am :o

I'm not doing a list, since it's Mother's Day, although there will be some laundry and I've already achieved playing with my present (building some lego :o)

Happy birthday cygnets

very tired and full of pizza we had a Domino's tonight - dd's idea of the most decadent birthday feast she could think of (although I did offer fried chicken and mashed potato)
3 extra girls round
dh took the boys to a football match
my friend came to visit whilst doing the capital ring walk - very inspiring and she was in excellent ironic form

that was last night

today ds2 is assembling a ginormous model airport and dd is trying out her present with her friends upstairs. The cats are enjoying leaping from batch of wrapping paper to the next..and

strangely enough there has been no mention of Mother's Day!!!!

Toffee I think your dh is very helpful but it also is true that two nights of putting the children to bed and cooking/thinking of dinner is much appreciated. Dh is meant to do Wednesday and usually he organises Sat lunch too. He puts ds2 to bed and reads him a story 90 percent of the time. The result is that he is perpetually harassed and badtempered though - beware of what you wish for

peg I think the process of changeover from school to home is a considerable detoxification with all the emotions that brings. I think it is also easier when the sun shines! We did it in Sept and it was heaven to be outside whilst everyone was stuck in a classroom but at this time of year all the school events might seem quite tempting to a little one.

Have you thought of trying to organise a little outing with some other home edders so that your dd has the feeling of a social network/school advantages without disadvantages. This had never occurred to me but someone said that everyone leaps at the chance to go on a little structured activity day to a museum or art gallery - prices are usually lower if there is a group and you can sometimes get a workshop organised by professionals etc (all subsidised) There is a lot out there - it is just knowing to "look". I am trying to get a Hampton Court outing together for older children - so daunting but I know it would be fun.

Oh my gosh I just checked my phone and found out my friend has had her baby. Just in time for Mother's Day! I am so happy I am in tears. This is all she ever wanted and for her whole adult life she thought it would never happen. And now her baby is in her arms :) :) :)

Not relevant to Flying I know but I'm just so happy I had to share!!! :o

Ds2 was hilarious (and awful too - at 7am one does not want to hear screaming children) He woke up much too early and banged on dd's door (wherein was 3 girls) and sang Do You Want To Build a Snowman? It's My Birthday TOOOO" I think the visiting girls were alright about it and thought it quite witty but dd was not pleased.

Congrats on Friend's baby peg

Thank you swan we are quite lucky locally there's loads going on so I'm trying to find the balance between not doing too much (for my sake as well as theirs) and doing enough to make sure they have fun and meet people!

I'll definitely look out for specific trips with others thank you

That's lovely about friend's baby Peg.

Toffee - my DH totally opts out of the early evening routine WRT the DC unless I nag him. I have pointed out that it would make a huge difference to them if we both took time out to read with one each of them in the evenings instead of me trying to do both, plus sorting out homework, spellings, music practice, baths etc, he never actually says anything but does retreat to the sofa unless nagged, it really annoys me.

Off to Go Outdoors in a bit to get DS kitted out for Scout Camp next weekend, walking boots for a boy who can't do shoelaces. I have bought some curly ones that are supposed to be helpful, so will be trying those out and hoping for the best. Must email scout leaders and mention that he won't eat the sorts of things that figure heavily in camping food, that is potatoes, sausages, stews, baked beans . I will ask them to just let him eat cereal if he wants to.