Fledglings are Flying into February

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

Welcome to the February Fledglings thread. Before we get started we have some important notices?:

1. The Fledglings are a long running thread, some of us have known each other for several years but newcomers are always welcome.

1. We follow the Flylady way (somewhat flexibly) and we adapt it to suit our lives and needs. That also means we chat a lot too, it is a general thread about life, as well as Flylady.

So the fly lady system there are rules and we have adaptations.?

1. NO perfectionism - life’s too short.?
2. Something is better than nothing and sometimes good enough really is good enough.?
3. This is not about the housework, it is about having more time to do fun stuff. Don't ever feel guilty about doing stuff with the kids over doing the housework. The kids are more important.??And the practical adaptations.
4. For newbies to the Flylady site and system everything you need will be posted here in the form of links. The homes is divided into zones where we spend one week each on a monthly basis. Within the zones we do babysteps and decluttering - the babysteps are little daily habits to get into, decluttering speaks for itself. As we progress we start doing missions (a more in depth task in that weeks zone). We may even get to detailed cleaning once we have decluttered. There are also daily tasks, on a weekly basis.

WARNING: Unless you want a very cluttered inbox full of gushing quotes and testimonials DO NOT subscribe to the Flylady emails from the site.

So, welcome on board and lets get Flying in February!

Blue I should really get into the habit of cooking in the afternoons when the DC are at home; they have a hot meal at midday, but there's no reason why I can't prepare most of it the day before. I do enjoy cooking when I have the time, but I don't even seem to have time to menu plan or buy the ingredients I need atm. I keep meaning to do a three-week rotating menu but don't seem to be getting very far with it - although jacket potatoes will definitely be going on it, as I did them today for the first time in ages and they went down really well (DS, who I usually struggle to get to eat anything savoury, even asked for a second helping). Oh, and cleaning comes right at the bottom of my list!

DD1 at neighbours', DD2 practising the piano and DS at first communion class, so time to fit in a bit more work...

A quick hello - half-term totally trashed all my routines and yesterday/today I've been quite ill with a nasty cold. Am still in bed! Have just caught up with the thread but head is too fuzzy to remember who has done what.

Dd1 refused to return to school today. We usually have this problem after the holidays. Fingers crossed for tomorrow.

Evening all! Still haven't caught up with thread properly, so hope everyone ok! No Flying to speak of as have been at work. Managed to stick a few things in wm and as dh is away, will be sticking ready meal in oven tonight too

Thanks Toffee - if you could look after thread/do links from Sat eve to Tues eve to inclusive, that would be brilliant. (Not leaving now until Sat pm, owing to dh's pressure of work, and dd's osteopath appt, which has been moved.)

Paperwork here this morning too Bitchy as dh travelling again for him as well as me and to just top it off, we have two key staff off sick in office. Hope you and yours avoid electrocution!

Feetheart custom-made running gear sounds intriguing!! Congrats on your v. productive day and for surviving sleepover!

Swan Congrats on your extremely productive day yesterday too! Yes, survived ten dc here for baking session thankfully all arranged before fil took final turn for worse (led by animatrice, not me, thankfully, plus had baby-sitter helping out so not remotely onerous - well except for prepping downstairs bit). Then just had two extras staying over. (DD usually has the reasonably sedate type of sleepovers that involve visitors/family/cousins travelling through, so not many of the "friends from school" type.) There was lots of shrieking and then talking until about 1 am. Dh not keen to repeat the experience soon, but dd enjoyed it so much (and important being an only) she is already planning the next! Can't say I am a "sleepover natural" as a mother though. Find it all rather stressful. So you definitely have my sympathies on that front!! And good luck with LA visit! (Give 'em hell!!) And congrats on ds2 being ready to start more formal lessons again! Testament to both of your hard work/efforts!

Blue yy to cooking over cleaning anytime (hence my current waist measurement). Hope lurgy retreats soon! And thanks to Swan can now only visualise you all sitting in humungously large bubble bath in sitting room!!

Minisok sympathies re: groundhog nature of household chores! Courage!!

Linzer Good luck with work pile! Ditto here wrt lack of creative input required by parents (compared to uk)! (But I confess to being one of those annoying parents who secretly enjoy all of that sort of stuff!! Like everything craft/sewing/painting related - completely incompetent in other areas of life however )

We have the book-reading "rallies" but no costumes required. Only need to make costumes once a year for Carnaval, and even that has now been taken under school's wing and included in art lessons. Oh and parents are often asked to make costumes for end of year play but in an organised way, not individually. No creative writing either just factual, dry as dust presentations (but pupils are just starting to wear costumes to accompany those!)

Btw, moving countries is definite Plan B (and it would only be dd and me, with dh commuting at weekends, as dh's work is firmly based here). So not ideal. And it will only happen if dd fails the obligatory, state, end-of-primary exams that ALL dc must pass in order to progress on to state secondary school. DD's marks are average/fine and teacher not too worried but (a) dd is very VERY prone to exam stress like her mother and exams take place with masses of dc in huge, alien halls,with rows and rows of desks, in huge strange schools across town with stern adjudicators (b) maths (a large component of exam) is not her strongest subject and is taught in her weakest language. So anything could happen! (Not letting dd know the significance of all of this of course - trying to play it v. cool at school and home!)

If pupils do fail, they are either put back a year in primary school or have to go to a special school "for failures" (as they delightfully describe them here) neither of which I feel I could put dd through, hence the possible move to UK if it all goes belly up. Not that that would be easy either though, as all UK places no doubt taken by the time we find out results!! And all the research I have done wrt to multi-ling ed suggests that optimum lang retention takes place (if learnt from early yrs ) up until approx 13 yrs/14 yrs. So would prefer if dd carried on here at least for first two years of secondary (they start secondary a year later here than in uk).

Sorry for huge long essay-like reply! (Sorry - should have pm'd you - rather than ramble on on this thread!!) Bet you wish you had never asked now!! (Elephant in room: I would secretly love to rtn to UK for a few years but we are not supposed to mention that too often as dh starts getting tetchy )

Whoknows good luck with OU marks! Wrt costume: have a look at - cloak made from black sheet - and loads of other "how to make Harry Potter/wizard costume" - type vids on You Tube such as . Good luck!!

Off to crack the hwk whip! Keep going fledlings! Big wing flaps to all!

Sorry Toffee that should have read, Sat eve to Tues eve inclusive (including links Tues eve). Thank you!!

Oh dear Bitchy that was meant to read [sigh] for him as well as for me but it turned in to a sort of link by mistake. Fortunately, I can't open it, thought it might be something embarrassingly identifying. Please can someone reassure me you can't open it either!!

Will stop writing posts in such a rush in future and preview one of these days

x post Sorry to hear you have been so ill Bless and that you have had school refusal stress to contend with too. Hope both resolve themselves soon!

¨Swan/HP fans this probably is not remotely relevant but I love Moaning Myrtle

DVDs away, books swapped from upstairs book shelf to downstairs for dc (landing is a tip though with stuff which now needs rehoming). Our cookbooks on empty upstairs shelves.

Dc quite enjoying getting a book with ease. Esp Dts.

Onwards and upwards!

Swan no fear, i loved the books and the films of harry potter. it is divergent/maze runner/percey jackson etc etc that I have not read/seen/have no fecking clue what ds is on about when he whittles on.

SC no electrocution and changing the light fitting is easier than feared so possible to do this weekend weather dependant (need enough daylight to see to do job). I like moaning myrtle too.

SC - that link is shocking! Had no idea you'd be into that sort of thing....

SC - that link is shocking! Had no idea you'd be into that sort of thing....

More success on the tidying and decluttering here this morning - due to waking up at 5am and not getting back to sleep...(don't want to repeat that tomorrow)

Ds2 played out at friend's house (he was meant to bring said friend back home but that didn't happen till afternoon) so I kept on going with the tidying and sorting of the home ed stuff etc and kitchen is vastly improved.

done
dusted under kitchen island
reunited lids
reunited all the biscuit tins
threw away mountains of waste paper
cleared worktops
did some washing
swept floor
finally cleared the top of the kitchen island of about three hotspots
hung my calendar on the wall with a drawing pin [sob] this has taken me about a year - it has been merely propped up before

can't say I did any actual paperwork though or wrote any dates on calendar

went to dentist - infection and pain has subsided - she said there was nothing there - maybe a mysterious root problem [sinister]

ds2 played football in the garden with a friend

However on minus side ds2 deteriorated this evening and has been very agitated and difficult - upset dd - dd then had fight with him - ds1 being sage and saintly - but all in all everyone has been a bit trying. Dh still exhausted. Fish and chips seemed to make everyone behave far worse (except for ds1 who loved them) Won't be trying that "easy takeaway" again..was obviously a trigger for ds2 hanging around in chip shop..

Oops, so shocked I posted twice, SC .

What is wrong with Mumsnet this evening? It's very slow and keeps timing out .

Tech need to put 50p in the meter or something, Toffee.

Sorry to disappoint everyone, but I'll be really glad to get rid of the downstairs bath tomorrow! Boys have been strictly banned from playing in it for fear of damage (to themselves or it).

Sounds like a good day's flying, swan, although sorry the evening deteriorated.

Still no news of book-related dressing up, but we have just had a letter about dressing "funny" for Comic Relief...

I am very as I got a blank page.

Glad to see the thread picking up speed again, it's nice when all the Fledglings come back to the nest .

A bit of a mixed day here, a grumpy start with an overtired DD, a rather disheartening meeting with the DCs school this morning, followed by a cuppa with a dear friend who is very supportive when things get tough. Also found out the date for our tribunal over DS's statement, which is further off than I had hoped it would be (July), however it has been nice in other ways and ended up in a nice family meal out. Flying wise - I have reorganised a bit in order to provide the cats with a new corner for their beds, they have been sleeping in boxes in the bottom of our wardrobe, but we have had a few incidents of them accidentally getting shut in (it has sliding doors) so they have been moved to a cosy spot under some shelves on the landing where they can survey the world but feel snug at the same time.

Oh and a nice surprise, I received a book in the post from MN, one of the ones they give out for people to read and review, I've never been successful in the past, but this is one I have had on my wishlist for a while, so that was good. Just got to find time to read it now. Oh and I've decided to defer my OU studies till this tribunal is over, I have realised that I am showing proper signs of stress (feel like crying far too often and waking up in the night). So that is all planned and I will pick it up again in the autumn, it's a relief to be honest.

Weds 25th Feb.

Babystep - read a testimonial (optional)

Mission throw away two pairs of shoes - I got rid of half a dozen earlier this month, so I am going to tick that off as done.

Anti-procrastination day. I have got some phone calls I really must make.

WhoKnows Ooh, how exciting; what's the book?

Hmm, anti-procrastination day... I am currently procrastinating about phoning to make an appointment for a mammogram, but have decided to wait until work is a bit quieter (well, that's my excuse). I thought I'd get a few years off now that they've upped the minimum age from 35 to 45, but you can ask for "special permission" to have one done if you're between 40 and 45 - which my overly cautious gynae has told me I should do (no family history, risk factors, etc.).

SC Yes, we have costumes for carnival here too but the DC made their own when they were at kindergarten (during kindergarten hours, I mean; not that they were child sewing prodigies ) and have just taken something out of the dressing-up box since.

Blimey, I thought school was bad enough here if you're even slightly below average (actually, I think you probably have to be above average to get on ok) but at least we don't have schools for failures! Being put back or having to repeat a year is not uncommon, though. I often think that DD1 would have got on better in the British school system. She's not unhappy at school but the pressure is unrelenting; DH has been coming home early the last few days to help her revise for her maths exam (quite a bit of shouting involved ) - my help no longer seems to be required in anything other than English. At least the pressure is spread throughout the year so they never have more than one exam a week, but they have frequent tests and "repetitions" (still haven't worked out the difference) which often seem to involve as much revision as an exam.

Confession time: I too often think about what our life would be like if we returned to the UK and whether I would be happier. It's strange; I feel very at home here, we have a great life, know lots of lovely people, DC very settled - and yet... But I think I have a rose-tinted view of life in the UK and there's no point thinking about it too much as there's no way we'd want to uproot the DC.

Morning everyone, I've been AWOL again....

The thread seems to have taken off again and so it's taken me a while to catch up.

My DS is not actually in nursery on world book day so I get out of it this time, yippee! Although, I think it could be fun if I had enough time to make an absolutely perfect work-of-art costume not a perfectionist at all, oh no

SC WhoKnows, sorry you are all having school worries, sounds horribly stressful. But on the flip side, Toffee glad your DS had a good school trip.

Welcome to Minisok' I nearly fainted when I read about all the work you have cut out for you with your family 'nest'. Little and often is the way to go I'd imagine

Waves to Bitchy Linzer Engles Swan Bless Saymwa Feet Dogsbum and all others I've missed.

Morning all!

Toffee. You had me worried there for a moment!! [decides not to post links to "variants on knob polishing" sites ]

So sorry to hear that the meeting was disappointing Whoknows and that the tribunal date for your ds is so far ahead. Also that you are so (understandably) overwhelmed. Sounds like a v good and sensible strategy to take time out from anything that adds to the burden but don't forget to replace it with something that is a stress reliever for you.

Ditto Bitchy your Percey Jackson is my Aurelie LaFlamme. DD is obsessed with this character (seemingly endless series of teenage diary type books). Apart from the fact that they are school teacher approved, I have absolutely no clue!! And yet they're all dd wants to talk about. Going to have the read the wretched things aren't I?

Swan Congrats on all the tidying/decluttering, and for getting so much done, including calendar!! It is a sad fact nowadays that the days when I get most done are the ones when I am up at crack of sparrows. Hope you caught up on a bit of sleep last night.

Congrats on book/dvd reorganisation Minisok Keep going!!!

Big anti-procrastination wing flaps to everyone else!!

Could have happily strangled dd this morning. Don't ask her to do much around the house as we are focusing on studies atm. One of the few things I ask her to do is pack her sports kit the night before gym (Tues nights). And she has only managed to do it ruddy once since Sept (and that was with me standing over her nagging supervising) and I refuse to micro manage an 11.5 yr old (for this particular task anyway!!). All she has to do is (1) get sports bag from hook on wall, (2) put trainers and socks in sport bag and then (3) lift entire sports kit (washed by yours truly) in the ruddy bag.

[Reminded her three times last night btw.]

And yet, how is it, that Wed morning comes as a surprise every single %!§"&é week . Even worse this morning, she was eating her breakfast with her trainers at her feet. And then neglected to bring them upstairs to pack!!! [And breathe]

Honestly feel like tearing my hair out!! Trying to get her more independent for secondary school (headmistress of primary has expressed concerns about this) but one might as well whistle in the wind ... .

[End of long boring rant] [And breathe]

Off to harness motivating anger and tidy the house!!

Have a good day everyone!!

Ta da so far:

Cats fed
DS and I fed
Recycling put out for collection
Random bits of clutter removed from en suite
DS bed made and room straightened up

It seems I have unknowingly completed some missions! Chucked out old shoes and tidied bottom of wardrobe the other day as well as tidied my bedroom side table

today's to do list:

Make bed
Put on wash-load
Fold and put away dry laundry
Empty dishwasher
Repair yet another pair of DHs work trousers
Pack DS an overnight bag and take him to MILs this evening
Quick trip to town:
*Take bits to charity shop
*take a bunch of rings to jeweller for sizing so I can list on eBay
*Take old medicines to chemist for disposal
*get some essential food bits

As it is anti procrastination day I have the following to do:
Phone elderly aunt
Phone elderly uncle
Phone plumber
Phone handyman

That's a lot to do..... But first,

x posts

Big waves to Greymalkin

Linzer v. similar here re unrelenting pressure and in that dh has taken over with the maths tuition (also lots of shouting and loud protesting from dd "but we only do it this way!!!) and dd has started to overtake me in French (was always way ahead of both of us in Flemish!). So I'm just chief checker/nagger now. Oh and I always help her to learn poems (one of the few enjoyable tasks!!) and can help slightly with "eveil" (blend of science, geog and history).

But I think, as we were talking about yesterday, it's the lack of creativity that gets to dd sometimes. Think the British system would have suited her far more in terms of stimulating the imagination/encouraging creative thinking. (You have to leave the UK to appreciate properly how creative the education system is, and how non-literal the English language is too!)

But, as you say, v. easy to just look at these things through rose-tinted specs. We are always on holiday, visiting family and friends when visiting UK, so dd sees it as a land of permanent 'tea and cakes'. Really appreciate many (mainly practical) things about the life here (such as fab health care). Think I just have itchy feet atm because good friends have moved away, job prospects zero, and I am desperate to have more animals/grow veg!! But it's not all bad by any means!!

Newcomers: please forgive all the non-Flying chat, and please don't let it put you off!!

SC Indeed; I know I take the practical aspects of life here (excellent and affordable public transport, health care, etc.) for granted. And there would be a lot I'd miss espcially the cheap wine if we moved back. But even after 16 years of living outside the UK, there's still a lot I miss (shops and people!) and most of my closest friends are there. Sorry to hear about your friends moving away; that always makes the situation harder and would give me itchy feet too.

Yy to being chief checker and nagger... I'm sure I'd be able to be more involved in the DC's education if we were in Britain. Other than checking they've done their homework/revised, I don't feel like I can contribute much any more (and more to the point, the DDs don't want me to! Only DH will do, apparently...). DD1 is also facing the difficult decision of which school to apply for next year once she's finished middle school; unless she takes the (very) academic route, it's most likely to be a vocational school - but having only just turned 13, she still doesn't have much of an idea about what she wants to do afterwards.

Apologies to everyone else for the derailment.

Grey Good luck with your list; it's making me feel very lazy... have only emptied half the dishwasher so far (DH did the first half before he went to work).

Back to work... DS is going to a friend's straight after school today, so I still have 2.5 hours of child-free time before the DDs get home, which is making me feel slightly less panicky about the amount of work I have to do!

I have gone down with a bad cold, which is slowing me down today (excuses ...) will probably head back to bed for a bit shortly.

Hope you're feeling better soon, Fizrim; colds are miserable.

I spoke too soon about my child-free hours; not long after my last post, I had a text from DD2 to say she'd be home an hour early as she didn't have PE (PE teacher away skiing apparently - surely the school could have given us slightly more notice as they must have known about this before 11.30am?). Tbh I knew this was going to happen as soon as I'd arranged for DS to go to his friend's, although I had my money on DD1 as she seems to be home early at least once a week. I'm sure supply teachers exist here - I've definitely heard the term - but they don't seem to be very active in the DC's schools.

And yet more urgent work has arrived. I'm hoping to be able to post something Flying-related before the end of this month, but am feeling increasingly pessimistic.