Time for a bonfire of the clutter? Perhaps not but Fledglings are flying high with the fireworks through November...

[BlueEyeshadow]

Huge thanks to SC (and Bitchy!) for leading the thread throughout October (and to SC for such a copy and paste-able OP)

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support and wine and cake along the way.

Flylady link here.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework, which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

1. start or repeat baby steps

1. repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

1. reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

[And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.]

More info here on getting started and Flying lessons . Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Don't be put off by the barf-tastic language of the site - the underlying system is sound!

Three key points to keep in mind:
(1)No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine
(2)You are never behind just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
(3) It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking lists but don't let that worry you! Do what you can, anything is better then nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!

Oh and don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey – some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome!

Sorry Alice I'm with the others, Christmas starts far too early. Dd used to think I'm the worst mummy in the world as we don't decorate until the 21st. Then I told her DM doesn't do it until Christmas Eve (and would have them down on the 27th if she can get away it)

Dd back at school today, so fingers crossed she won't be off tomorrow. So had a nice long walk today getting vegetables and a quick trip to Lidl, getting Christmas treats (will have to hide liquours from DH or he'll scoff the lot tonight)

Sorry Alice but I am joining the fold of people wanting to delay Christmas ephemera for as long as humanly possible - not being a grinch, honest - love it when it has finally arrived! Btw, I have never quite understood, in North American terms, where Thanksgiving ends and Christmas begins? Do the decorations go up for both? Or are they still largely two separate events?

Am loving all the secret 'raw' jelly eating that is going on on this thread! Bitchy I think you may have started a trend! (If us fledglings ever meet up in rl, we can be sitting in a bar, holding a packet of Hartleys instead of a carnation [grin

Today I have retreated from the world for the six hour school day, have even turned off the telephone (except to sil) and am feeling a lot cheerier for it! Have even spent a little bit of time reading under the duvet after taking delivery of some Christmas presents delivered by Amazon in which I discovered a few, er, "extras" that I'd ordered for myself!

No Flying done except for endless laundry and bits of tidying but have planned good healthy meal for tonight to assuage my Catholic guilt about spending the day in such a self-indulgent way

Bitchy or perhaps I'll just wear a splash of cake mix instead

That's such good news about the school finally getting in to gear Swan with offering support for your ds1! Better late than never (although it must be frustrating that it didn't come earlier.) Hope your ds2 feels better soon and an emphatic "yes" to your ta da list yesterday being more than fine. I am always so impressed by how child-centred your days are. And more vigorous head-nodding and general outrage over husbands who bring home unhealthy food!! (In my dh's case it is either processed pork products of which Belgium has an abundance or very fat/lard intense pastries!!)

Argh, just realised I must go and stick my head under the shower (currently colouring the Barnet Fair) or hair will turn navy blue or something odd ....

BBL for more personals! Big feathery waves to everyone in meantime!

pffffttt... scrooges

SC Our Christmas decorations go up this weekend, as in our family it was tradition to put up the tree and decorations over Thanksgiving weekend (Thanksgiving is Thursday), as that's when everyone was home - such as older siblings from University and such - so that everyone can participate in putting up the tree and putting the ornaments up. Because that's how I grew up, I just automatically do it as well. We are celebrating Thanksgiving on Thursday, and then the tree will get put up Friday evening (after the dcs are in bed - until they are old enough to actually HELP putting it up! ), and Saturday we start decorating it. Sunday we'll be doing some Christmas baking and getting together with friends.

The nice thing about doing some of it now is that as Christmas gets closer, things get more hectic and carving out time to get things like that done get more and more difficult, and then it becomes this big chore. So I quite like getting it done early and relaxing more in December. Some of the baking we do this weekend will be put into the freezer until Christmas, which will save me extra time right before Christmas.

Bitchy aw to your ds giving credit where credit is due! Glad to hear the bullying is under control too, despite boys being boys.

Congrats re the decluttering Goth!

Swan! And sympathies over trying to help ds1 in Spanish. Everyday occurence here that I don't quite 'get' a lot of the hwk (even when I understand the words ifyswim!) and everything takes three times as long (esp in Flemish!)

Thank you Blue I did indulge in cake yesterday which is unfortunate as I am desperately trying to lose a stone before Christmas (and before I see the stern French cardiologist with her clacking heels and her dreaded exercise bike)

Engels hope you are surviving your last three days before ml and not over-doing it!

I'm with Toffee over killer lady-birds!! Eh?? They don't bite do they? Our house is over-run with enclaves of ladybirds (currently hibernating in window frames).

DD back, must go! Big waves to eveyrone else!!!

bloody invading biting lady birds

oh yes they do bite

and the wikipedia information

ah how to get rid of the bloody things

Have i convinced you yet. Do note it is not the native species of ladybird that bites but the new invader species. Which is probably why most people don't know about it.

I am supposed to be in the middle of a party. I am feeling very tired grumpy and anti social so have snuck away for a 10 min break before going to be social in a bit

See I grew up where the christmas tree got put up on Christmas eve (when we celebrated) and then taken down at the end of January. I find if the tree goes up at the beginning of december I am just desperate for the damm thing to come down on the 26th and normality to resume. But that is more as I have been an adult. Mind you we also celebrated all the advent sundays and there were decorated candle rings/candles things up from the 1st advent sunday so not completely devoid of christmas stuff. So I guess it is what we have all grown up knowing.

Evening all!

1 down, 2 to go sc ! Almost there!

Christmas tree here goes up 6th December after Sinterklaas.

Bitchy - DSs seem to specialise in declarations of that sort when you least expect it in my experience. Glad he appreciates you. :)

Swan - glad the school has got its act together. Hope it all helps.

SC - glad you had a relaxing day, and hope you’ve managed to kick the guilt!

Well done, Engels - you’re nearly there!

Chiming in with all the Christmas decorating stuff – my parents don’t put the tree up until 23rd December. As a child I was always desperate to do it sooner to be in line with my friends. We now generally do ours somewhere in the middle of Dec. but we’re the odd ones out in our neck of the woods for keeping the tree up till Twelfth Night. Most people seem to have got rid of them by about New Year. :( We also have Advent candles this year, which is nice, and the cards add a decorative element once they start arriving.

Alice - do you have separate Thanksgiving decs? An American family I knew in Germany did – all corn cobs and Turkeys and suchlike.

Anyway, flying continues non-existent here, but my email/website issues are almost sorted, I’ve done some work and went for a swim at lunchtime.

*
Babystep seems just to be a reminder that you’re never behind and to jump in where you are.

Mission is dusting neglected corners of the living room.

Wednesday is Anti-Procrastination Day, folks.

**

Somebody volunteered to do the December thread, but I can’t remember who it was… It’s creeping up though!

Day went alright except ds2 very coldy...and refused to watch Harry Potter and Goblet of Fire with me which was meant to be our fun relaxing afternoon (he watched 30 mins and then gave up

In the morning we did The Winter's Tale characters - drawing activity and he also drew another plane (seems odd I record these puny efforts but he really never draws so this counts as full on Art)

Dh returned at 4pm from business in town and from then on we had a series of rather badtempered children milling around.

I walked to get dd's ingredients for her paella cooking at school tomorrow (exercise)

Ds1 then had a gigantic strop when he found the IEP and insisted that we drop at least two of the interventions as he said he couldn't bear the TA sitting next to him "annoying him" and "breathing" on him. I think he feels humiliated by being singled out for help in his particular set which is a middle set. Anyway we came to some compromise. He will attempt to put up with 3 weeks of interventions but not TA. He admitted he needed a bit of help with a few things (although he is still unable to quite explain what he finds difficult) Just keeps saying he is fine with "C"s.

Read some more Star of Kazan to ds2 and composed a story for dd for her drama assignment

Washed loads, ironed a big pile of clothes, swept floor, fed children nourishing leftovers and snacks, including some pumpkin chilli soup, fed cats, gathered up recycling and took out the rubbish.

And put out a dreadful kitchen table hotspot which had been burning for many days

Evening all,

I'm sitting on the fence WRT Christmas, I used to be firmly in the not until December camp, but have gone somewhat the other way no, we won't have dcorations up for another 2-3 weeks, but all the planning and prep is well under way.

So, today, lots of little jobs, paperwork, laundry, sewing badges on uniforms etc. It rained all day, so I got the slowcooker going and we had braising steak and mash for tea followed by blackberry and apple crumble.

The bleach and bicarb came out too - amazing! Some of our uPVC windows have little black mildew spots on their silicone sealant which has proved impossible to shift so far. Did the bathroom window today - it looks like new! Amazing. I'll be working round the other rooms in due course.

Swan - hoorah for the new IEP, even if DS isn't keen. My DS's has gone the other way in the new format, all he's got his two English targets. Needless to say still no news on the statement front, tried ringing the council again today, got fobbed off again.

Hi everyone. I've been AWOL for a while but have finally caught up on the thread, and had a great flying day but now CBA to list all my lovely ta-da's as the last hour has been hell.

DS has coughed so violently he now can't stop being sick. We've gone through three bottom sheets, two duvets, three sets of pjs (one went straight to the bin), various soft toys plastered in it, as well as the bed guard, puddles all over the carpet in his room and the hall and on the bathroom floor.

The first lot of stuff went in the washing machine and the rest I've been hosing off in the bath while DH comforts DS who is distraught after two baths in 20 minutes.

WTF? How do I even begin to clean up? And the smell!! I've almost spewed as well it's so foul. Poor DS, he can't have anything left inside him now.

We are now out of clean bedding for him. If it happens again, we're screwed.

stomps off for mop, biohazard suit and gin

Hello all - me again... Very little real flying but lots of vicarious flying as I lurk & read all your posts.

Swan - I am truly amazed at how much you have achieved today.

I'm struggling at moment - house a tip again; DS forms & whatnot never signed - I've just worn the sane tights twice in a row because couldn't even find the dirty ones in the washbasket never mind any clean ones

On plus side I'm in the Christmas in November camp. I was always 1 December but now have decided the longer the merrier. Decs coming out slowly but will be explosion on Friday when tree gets bought & put up

I'm struggling to do anything apart from work - eat supper - read DS to sleep & fall asleep next to him

But managed to get myself up beside DS today at 10pm. 15m decluttering sitting room. (Read 'moving shit from sitting room to bedroom)

5m in DS room tidying

Hotspots - top of drawers & desk in bedroom; shelves in hall; bathroom windowsill.

Swished & swiped dining table & bathroom sink / loo top

Put clothes out for DS & me for tomorrow

Did not wash up. Did not pass go. Definitely did not pick up £200

coffee - sounds like the norovirus . Poor DS (and the rest of you). It swept through each of us a few years ago and we all suffered that horrible, obnoxious smell. I hope DS is better soon.

Swan - great news about the IEP. I wonder if you taking DS2 out of school to home ed has had an impact too. Maybe it's made the school try harder with DS1.

WhoKnows - glad Bitchy's bleach and bicarb solution worked. Must try it.

Blue - I'm relieved to see that even our thread leader isn't getting much Flying done.

Engels - good news that you are so nearly on ML.

Bitchy - I had no idea about those ladybirds . DS2's arm came up in several little bumps yesterday and he was itching furiously. I thought it was an allergic reaction and gave him an antihistamine, which did the trick. Now I'm hunting for ladybirds...

SC - I'm so glad you retreated from the world to relax today - and that you ordered some treats for yourself. Well deserved.

Alice - you will be shocked to hear that I am attempting to give Christmas a miss this year and we won't be getting a Xmas tree. This is partly because it would be a nightmare with the kittens, but also because we are going to my Mum's for Xmas, so she will be doing all that stuff. We will make homemade decorations and put up cards, but that's all I'm planning.

ta da

Fed cats
Ocado shop delivered first thing
Cleaned and cleared fridge before putting stuff away (should have done that before, but still)
Unloaded and reloaded d/w
Put rubbish and recycling out
Cleared and wiped kitchen counters
Dealt with litter trays
B/fasts
To Brighton with DH and DS2 - shopping; visit to museum; fish and chips
Home: played Maths games with DS2
Supervised ConquerMaths (DS2)
DS2 practised writing by writing more thank-you letters
Let DS2 have a go at making lemon cheesecake
Made dinner
Went up to remind DS1 to do his homework for tomorrow and found him asleep
Watched 'Watchdog' with DS2 and DH
DS2 to bed
Watched telly with DH
At midnight, DS1 woke up and is now wide awake

Don't feel as if I'm doing enough formal work with DS2 at the moment, but am seeing a lot of educational value in the stuff we did today: independent reading (DS2 is reading a book about Pompei), cooking, Maths games, trip to Brighton museum, writing letters... Oh, and DS2 has developed a passion for 'Watchdog' - I'm sure that must be educational too.

By the way (in case anyone else has this happen to them), I was phoned yesterday by someone with a strong Indian accent telling me that he was calling from our internet server supplier to tell me that we had a virus on our line which was slowing down our connection . I thought that sounded fishy immediately (virus on internet connection?), but was momentarily caught out because our connection is very slow at the moment and keeps cutting out. And because the caller sounded as if he was calling from call centre. Anyway, I refused to log onto my computer, which is what he was telling me to do, and said it wasn't convenient. He rang back again tonight, but by them I'd googled and found out that it was definitely a scam. So, watch out if it happens to you. They get money from you, if you are misguided enough to do what they tell you.

Night all.

X-post, Still. I'm impressed that you managed to do what you did, considering how little time you have. My house is a tip too. I didn't manage to do my planned home bluegh on Monday. And I have given up ironing and am now wearing creased clothes all the time. I have also had to wear things twice in a row because I couldn't find any clean ones - you are not alone .

I'm finding having children and cats in the house all the time is definitely not conducive to keeping a clean and tidy house.

Whoknows I still look at the shower sealant and think blooming heck that is bright and shiny. Will be interesting to see how long it takes for the black mould to come back or if it actually does come back. Other treatments hadn't shifted it and those which had reduced it have seen it return to as bad as it was within weeks. 1 week on and it is still sparkling. Tile grout otoh needs doing as the sparkling sealant shows up how not sparkling the grout is

Tomo requires lots of stupid little things. My lung hate me, insomnia has been in charge for weeks and tbh as nice as it is that we have visitors I do wish they weren't here as I am really not feeling sociable.

Wednesday To do list
ds to school with lunch box
get 2 padded envelopes
address up parcel 1
find all paperwork, get file ready for handing over.
Duplicate necessary paperwork
finish off a craft project and get parcelled up
Contact bank and double check email which believe to be a scam
big meeting in different town
small meeting in local town

Must also remember I need parking change and petrol.

Thank goodness Thursday is a quiet day - I hope. Just one meeting Thursday evening.

Toffee Antihistamine calms the ladybug bites I have had down so that was probably the only course of action other than the fact we are removing as we see them

Toffee Wow! I couldn't do that (not do the tree and all), but obviously I wouldn't honestly begrudge anyone else choosing their own options, even though I do some joking around a bit about it on here.

I well remember when dd was young and we had a new kitten at Christmas. On the advice of a friend, we finally had to put tin foil over the tree skirt and a few small balloons blown up on the lower half of the tree to discourage the kitten. This was after it spent days climbing and hiding in the upper half of the tree and leaping on people as they walked by the tree. I still remember my mother looking at the tree from near it saying "I don't remember you having a christmas decoration that looks like your kitten.... aaaaarrrrrgggghhhh!" (scream was because the kitten chose that moment to leap at her and land on her head) As entertaining as it occasionally was, it was a bit too stressful to worry about being mauled as you walked by the tree.

Am peeking my head above the parapets of moving-house-madness to wave at you all and say that I cannot WAIT to join you all again in December, when I hope to be flying from within my very own house..... .... complete with dishwasher woohoo!
Finished several weeks of scrubbing the rented house yesterday....so glad to be done with that.

Now to tackle new house, which is currently under a layer of sawdust. Work still ongoing...but I started unpacking my kitchen boxes into the new kitchen last night!

Looking forward to catching up with the thread .

Toffee would you consider a small, real potted tree - easy to decorate, festive - and safe for kitty. Although actually, kitty may just decide to use it as a litter tray... . Scrap that idea!!!

Good morning!

Arrrgggghhh!! Sounds horrible to say it, but I am not enjoying this phase of parenthood very much.

Peace of yesterday has been well and truly shattered!!

This morning we've had a horrible meltdown over lost training shoes (despite several reminders last night to find them). Apparently it is all my fault that dd will get zero for gym this morning (which is what happens when you don't have the proper kit). I managed to keep my temper until she started shrugging and saying "how on earth did she know where they were??" in an outraged way whilst sitting on the floor as if it was nothing to do with her (while dh and I ran around over five floors looking for them without success). Arrrggggh.

And last night after school we had an entire performance of Christmas carols past and present in various languages. Nowt unusual as dd always needs to blow off steam after school and all the energy usually emerges in a "jazz hands" sort of way (either singing or dancing) It was great for the first dozen. Then I started suggesting that we needed to get on with hwk, and supper etc etc, and yes, gym-bag packing etc. (Timing is quite tight if working backwards aiming for early bed which she desperately needs right now.) Anyway, apparently then I was "horrible and mean" so got persuaded against my better judgement to listen to next dozen (which have to be sung in full - every verse, every line included) was full of praise, but then got up go and prepare supper. AT which point, cue another huge meltdown and more "horrible" accusations (when I know in reality it was all about avoiding hwk). Just about managed to keep my temper.

And after supper (cod, mash and peas which she is one of her favourites but she hardly ate anything [sigh]) we had another meltdown about everything being "boring" and "the same". (And indeed, 6ieme primaire is basically a repeat, academically speaking, of everything you do in 5ieme with minor variations.) But when I pointed out that she has been to three parties in two weeks, she'd had friends over last weekend, she is going out to the theatre to see a ballet this Friday (for which she has a new dress) and is going to another party this Saturday, this didn't go down too well either [cue another meltdown] and mutterings and general misery.

And she's started not sleeping again (heard her going to the loo at 11pm) which I am certain is half the cause of all the above but have no idea what to do about it.

I'm sure other parents must have lovely calm mornings and evenings and exchange smiles and tender hellos and goodbyes etc. We don't seem capable of it right now; it's all stomps and frowns and shouting.

Mega-whinge over!

Oh SC . We haven't reached that stage quite yet, but I suspect it is very normal and not your fault, all I can suggest is deep breaths, try and keep the routines going and let her take the flak for the missing gym kit. here

Toffee - my friend had two kittens last September, after they pulled the Christmas tree over about three times it got moved to the porch. Out two were a bit older when we got them, but we tied the tree to a shelf on the wall behind with a cup hook and string and they didn't do too much damage. I agree that if you have one in a oot of soil they might try and use it as a toilet, mine do that to my pot plants, but I have managed to deter them by placing a layer of rosemary twigs from the garden over the surface of the soil.

Castle - that's great news about the house, so exciting!

Must go, work beckons.

Stewed we have tender goodbyes in the morning but we have screaming fits in the evening from dd! It is tiredness but more than just that - just a general hyped up ness which comes with the territory of being a pre-teen; they are like buzzing bees with no honey to collect. Well they have plenty of jobs to do, but they never want to do the ones we want or we think they need to do.

Dd is admirable and awful in equal measures atm. She is still only 12 so Lord knows how I can endure her getting more teenage. Dd is extremely sensitive to criticism and fears getting things wrong which will lead to outbursts over school related stuff and also affects her view of what she is entitled to (clothes treats etc) She compares everything to what her friends get (which is usually less than her but on a one off basis this doesn't translate well - ie: x has ipod, b has a larger car c has an older sister to look after her. she adds them all together and says she needs an ipod a larger car an older sister AND a holiday in Cyprus [rueful]

I now have a system with her where she is entirely responsible for finding her school uniform stuff although sometimes we hang out newly washed clothes if it is late at night when she decided to wash them. She is meant to organise her kit for games. She now does. She is still extremely messy though and keeps using the phrase "You are supposed to look after me". I'm afraid I now buy two sets of most things because it is the only way I can guarantee we can always find games kit and suchlike.

Better start work with ds2. Toffee I suspect you are doing more than you can imagine. Cooking for example is literacy and d & t.

PS I cannot remember being at all bolshy with my mum at that age but as with quite a few of my friends we all started screaming at our mums when we were in our late twenties so I think all that rebellion was just delayed.

Right, having got all of that off my chest (thank you patient and forebearing Flegdlings!!)

Castle Yay! How exciting!! Great to see you! I've been wondering how you have been getting on! So great you are nearly in your new house but take it steady with the scrubbing and look after yourself (and the bump!)!! Hope rest of move goes smoothly!

Coffeeandcream [hands over big bottle of Detto] Poor you and your poor little one! I hope he recovers soon. Sick bugs are truly miserable for all concerned. I hope he starts to feel a bit better today! (And that you managed to get a bit of sleep last night.)

Bitchy I am indeed now convinced about biting ladybirds! Whoever would have thought it??? It's amazing what you learn on this thread!! Will make a note of looking out for them from now on!! Have also noted down your mega-clean grouting recipe!

Alice thank you for thanksgiving explanation. Can certainly see the (relaxing) benefits of having decorations organised early! Arf at kittens hi-jacking people from inside Christmas trees!

Toffee Wow! Congrats on your mega-list and glad you avoided banking scam! I'm always getting dodgy e-mails here about virus protection and alleged problems with bank accounts.

Stillwearing agree with Toffee about being impressed by what you achieved, despite having so little time (so don't be too hard on yourself! ). Sometimes twice-worn tights are a necessity!!

Whoknows braising steak and mash followed by apple and blackberry crumble sounds like my idea of heaven!!

Swan Still amazed by the range and breadth of activities that you manage to turn your hand to every day!

Swan/Toffee and others who are home edding or who have dc who happen to be interested in medieval history ... have you all been watching 'The Secrets of the Castle' on Beeb 2. It is absolutely fascinating!! I have been glued to it!

Engels hope you get spoiled on your last day at work (for a while anyway)!!

Blue I like to keep the tree up until 12th night too although I find that they go a bit scraggy (because of central heating) after a fortnight or so, so sometimes they don't make it! Glad computer issues have been sorted. I think Goth very kindly volunteered to run December thread!

(Btw, was it you (or was it Whoknows or someone else?) who kindly recommended 'Raising the Spirited Child'? I am not sure dd qualifies on all fronts (she is generally quite well behaved outside of home and just reserves her spiritedness for us indoors ) but I have just taken delivery of it and read part of it and found a few of the strategies quite interesting! Will be giving them a try! So thank you for the recommendation!

Right, lots of mega-boring sutff to attend to but off to volunteering slot first.

Big feathery waves to everyone I've missed!