July 2014: fledglings follow Flylady's tuition (don't forget your pamper mission)

[ToffeeWhirl]

A big thank you to slackcabbage for superb thread leadership throughout June, as well as a great intro which I am going to shamelessly borrow from now.

Struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun)? In that case, you need Flylady.

Flylady is a system for managing housework. Starting with babysteps, it builds up into a routine which becomes second nature. In theory, once you are used to the system, you will have a tidy house you are not embarrassed by and plenty of time to get on with more interesting things.

Flylady banishes the panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. If you fall off the Flylady bandwagon, it’s no problem: you just jump back in where you are and carry on.

Don't sign up for the Flylady emails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on this thread on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, Flylady's steps and routines will be listed here on this thread.

Flylady uses a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

1. start or repeat baby steps

1. repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone

1. reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

(And detailed deep cleaning in each zone for those who have made real progress – not sure if anyone has reached this pinnacle yet…? I certainly haven’t).

More info here on getting started (but ignore step one!) and Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings.

Try to ignore Flylady’s purple prose (hard, I know) - the underlying system is sound!

Three key points to keep in mind:

1. No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine.

1. You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.

1. It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy overnight - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new, then trying to spend 15 mins decluttering and doing the babysteps is the most you should expect of yourself. Lots of us here like posting our ‘to do’ or ‘ta da’ lists and they can look quite scary. Don’t be put off.

If all else fails, try the power of three – just pick three things that most need doing and focus on those.

And if you have visitors coming over this afternoon and need a quick fix NOW, try Flylady's crisis clean.

We all know each other pretty well on this thread and some of us have been around for a long time, but all lurkers, oldies and newcomers are very welcome!

And on a separate note. Why was there a workman insisting on access if you weren't expecting there to be one? doddlekitty

Workman is doing bathroom downstairs. Was firting new radiator today, it hust didnt occur ro me hw would need access to other radiators.

Luckily dh did stand up to her. Poibted out that we both work full time and have child and she cant judge as shes never been in this situation.

I srill feel shit though. She must think im such a bad wife

a bad wife? Is your DH not capable of tidying up the bedroom? pfffft. Ignore her.

Bollocks to what she thinks. And stop making yourself feel guilty too. It is pointless. You do the best you can with the circumstances you have. it is as as simple as that. You are not and can not be super human. However you can make yourself feel really shitty but imposing unrealistic expectations. Fly lady is about not doing that. Chin up. tomo is a new day.

So after a weekend of a family 'do' with nothing done around the house, and two very later nights with everything dumped on floors I discovered that we had guests this evening utter panic

ta da
~emptied kitchen bin
~emptied recycling bin
~put out four large packing boxes for bin men
~put two good packing cases in end shed
~emptied nappy bin, bathroom bin and did a 15min blitz with a bin bag around the house
~did washing up and wiped down table/highchair/floor!
~hoovered downstairs
~moved bookcase to lobby and moved in childrens new tubs (four 40L for £10 from Aldi)
~did am organising blitz in the playroom - children now have a playfood tub, a train tub, a wooden toys tub and a soft toy tub
~bleached kitchen surface
~miltoned the kitchen sinks
~got brutal with checking end of dates in the herb cupboard
~S&S both bathrooms
~dusted hallway picture rails, dados and skirting boards
~put away 3 loads of laundry (despite the chaos of this weekend I did stay on top of washing at least)
~put a load of washing out to air
~watered the garden
~dinner and washing up afterwards
~entertained guests all evening

to do tomorrow - (work day)
~print & send appeal form for statement
~reply to two party invites
~arrange return labels for Amazon
~arrange dd1s party

doodlekitty I am raging on your behalf, thats super crappy of her to make you feel like that about your own home. Being a 'good wife' is an outdated and ludicrous concept when applied to housework - your DH and you are a partnership

Alice your wallpapering is ace!

whoknows what age were your DC when you got the allotment? I'm really struggling to get things done with mine (1 & 3)

coffee hi - welcome to the thread

waves to everyone else - baby woken up so need to leap off laptop!

So i have a short ta da list
ring camhs
finish one crochet project
start one new project and get 1 ball into the 2 balls it will take
work on a piece for a bigger project.
dabble in home waxing
give eyes a contact lens break
colour code diary
update diary.

essentially it has been a rest day.

Tomorrow i need to do a whole heap more stuff:
empty car
hoover car
ensure have paperwork for ds' training
find cheque
make up parcel and sort out postage
write letter x2
1 load of washing
ds to training
and i suppose i should do something on my room. perhaps. maybe.

coffeeandcream - welcome to the thread. Not sure if there are any useful tips here, but Flylady has a page on 'Flying with Pre-Schoolers'. Personally, I found housework more or less impossible to keep up with when my children were much younger, so you have my sympathies! Could DH help out more?

Bitchy - I'm not sure I've ever seen a short 'ta da' list from you before .

Eyelet - what a nightmare! At least you will be able to benefit from a tidy house when they've gone.

Doodlekitty - that's really rude of your MIL. Absolutely none of her business! Don't feel bad. You simply have too much to do and the bedroom was bottom of your very long list of priorities. She has clearly never been in your shoes.

Alice - that wall looks great!

WhoKnows - glad you had a pottering day today.

Hurrah for the departure of Michael Gove, Blue! But I'm sorry it came too late for your school .

Engels - hope you have a restful holiday, if that's possible.

Swan - how lovely that you saw your DS on YouTube, even if he was a bit grumpy at the time .

Fraggle - I hope the kicks up the bum did the trick and you now have a gleaming house.

Apologies to anyone I've left out. I'm too sleepy to concentrate, thanks to my early start this morning.

ta da

Got dressed to flipflops
B/fasts all round
Chores in house - sorted kitchen, washing up, swished and swiped in bathroom and so on
Essay writing
Lunch
DS1's online Maths lesson
(DS1 came top in his Maths quiz!)
Paid washing machine repairman lots of money
Listened to long lecture from same man about why our pipes were blocked (yawn)
Back to essay writing
Computer kept switching itself off (overheating), which was very frustrating
Made dinner with DS2: tripledecker fish and gold digger buns, both on the Cbeebies website. Really delicious.
More bloody essay writing
Watched 'Sopranoes'
Put DS2 to bed
Wrote final bit of essay (phew)

Am now making hot chocolate for DS1 and then taking myself off to bed. Night all.

Good grief Eyelet!! I'm tired just reading your list!!

Sorry, forgot the links!

Babystep No 16: look for an email from Flylady. Actually, please don't. Far better to stay unsubcribed and just chat to us instead.

Wednesday is anti-procrastination day. Time to get on with all those things you don't want to do. Wednesday's mission is here.

Flight plan is here.

Am off to bed now and will be sticking a large 'do not disturb sign' on our door.

Evening all,

Doodle - the others have said everything I would, it is none of her business, it is your DH's equal responsbility and she should keep her beak out. It is awful when people stumble upon your clutter inadvertently though. I still shudder about the time exDP and I had a late night, left the dinner dishes all over the side, got up too late to do them before work and then had an attempted break-in. We got home from work to find the neighbours waiting for us and as soon as we opened the front door they all trooped in to inspect the damage to the back door, the shame!

Eyelet - I only got the allotment last August, when the DCs were 9 and 7 and I struggle. I have to get DH to do the heavier digging as I have injuries that would make it very unwise and sometimes he just can't find time. I've only got about half of it cultivated this year and am struggling with the weeds. DD got quite bolshy tonight and would only let me stay long enough to water it. In another year or so I will be able to leave them both at home and go up there for a bit, but not yet. My allotment neighbours have 1 and 3 year olds and they are struggling too. I see you are statementing too, there are a few of us on here in that position (I'm appealing refusal to assess).

Proud mum alert!
We were invited to pick up early from Cubs tonight as DS was getting his Silver award (the highest you can get in Cubs, he's moving up next term). So, he got the award alongside a few others, then they announced Cub of the Year - guess what! It was DS. So proud. One of the leaders told me it had been a unanimous decision too. He's having a really good spell at the moment, very calm and confident, long may it continue. Cub camp this weekend, a nice way to end the term.

Ta-da!
Routines etc
Pilates class
Sainsburys shop
Cleaned bathroom properly including steam clean grotty base of loo etc
Shined sink properly (weeks of neglect )
Tidying generally
Watered allotment
Watered garden
Planted some flowers in garden
Cubs
Late night cookery session with the contents of the veg box, tomato pasta sauce, potato salad, salad for packed lunches next couple of days, wilted spinach to freeze.
A few emails and phonecalls dealt with

whoknows yes we are appealing as LEA have refused to assess.dd who was born with brain damage, she has learning disabilities, development delay and cerebral palsy.

Doodle ditto what EVERYONE else said.

Am at work today and 10 k run tonight so limited flying.
Must first:
Convince DS to take his vitamins orally

And, ooh I vacuumed yesterday! can't remember the last time I did that because there was SPACE!

I would also like to echo what everybody else has said it is none of your mil's business Doodle.

This mornings tada
Dc up, dressed and fed
Beds made
Lunches made
Kitchen sides wiped
House hoovered
Wm on

To do before leaving the house:
Dw on
Bleach down the toilet
Hang washing out

Best dash as Im not dressed yet!!

done
food shop
petrol
picked up ds2 (who was in an excellent mood, despite getting a detention for not doing his homework (he then was praised for his work in the detention - which is nice)
picked up ds1 back from Belgium. A mixed trip but on the whole he enjoyed all the public bits, especially Theme Park and Brussels Cathedral. Choc factory was rubbish he declared, all "history" and "no chocolate" (I think he was expecting Willy Wonka)

Ds1 has conked out today, but dd has already set off for school and ds2 about to go; I'm just printing out his homework for today.

Today 3 ladies are coming to lunch with me, cue frantic preparations, mostly cleaning and sorting out smelly suitcases.

I had eight hours' undisturbed sleep! Woohoo!

Swan - So glad your DS is home safe and that he mostly enjoyed it. I love his complaints about the chocolate factory . Hope your lunch is fun today.

Eyelet - I'm disgusted that you're having to go through the appeals process for your DD. The LEA should be ashamed of themselves. I'm also going through the statementing process for DS1 (up to 'proposed statement' stage - the battle won, but not the war).

WhoKnows - Congratulations to your DS! That's wonderful news and I'm not surprised you're proud. I was absurdly proud just to hear DS had come top in a Maths quiz, as he doesn't get many - well, any - successes these days. Enjoy being a proud mum!

to do

Finish this bloody essay
Loads of washing
Buy new shoes for DS2
Visit MIL
Prepare for school visit for DS1 tomorrow
Order online shopping

(The school we are visiting tomorrow is one hour away and he'd have to weekly board if he goes there. Have very mixed feelings about it, but haven't been able to find anywhere nearer that is suitable .)

DS2 has a friend round this morning, so I'm hoping they will play whilst I finish the essay.

That moment first thing in the morning when you discover why you needed to pop out to the shops yesterday but couldn't remember why it was yesterday and thus didn't bother to go. No lunch box drinks. Poo.

Hello, can I join you?

I am a lurking Flyer, picked up some great habits from these threads about a year ago and the house is in a good state now - though I am now 37 weeks pg with 5 yo twin boys it is hard to keep it that way!

I usually work full-time but I am working from home at the moment, Maternity leave starts next Thursday woohoo!!!!

Ta da
Dressed
DCs fed and off to preschool
Dishwasher emptied and reloaded
Washing on

To do
DC lunches for tomorrow
Hoover kitchen and playroom
Tidy desk
2 hrs on essay
1 hr on other work
Sort dinner
Bathroom mission
Tumble dry and fold washing

Going to start with the work as the boys get back at lunchtime and from then on all bets are off!

Dear heavens I hurt. I'm existing on painkillers and coffee and I'm at work doing lots of stuff today, so I can't even lie on the couch and moan. Mainly across my shoulders, lower back and thigh muscles. Ah well, at least it looks good!

So, today I have shit-loads of bloody awful work stuff to get through. Deep joy and bliss. I will not resort to chocolate... I will not resort to chocolate!

To do list
Find a drink in the snack stash in car
empty car
hoover car
ensure have paperwork for ds' training
find cheque
make up parcel and sort out postage
write letter x2
1 load of washing about to put on
ds to training
and i suppose i should do something on my room. perhaps. maybe.

To do
DC lunches for tomorrow
Hoover kitchen and playroom
Tidy desk
2 hrs on essay
1 hr on other work
Sort dinner
Bathroom mission
Tumble dry and fold washing

Slow progress!

Good morning, I've just caught up with the thread and am sending to whoever needs it. My DS's are older and I'd forgotten how exhausting the end of term is until I read your posts. I hope you get through the next few days and have more relaxing time over the holidays. It sounds like some of you home ed as well, out of curiosity do you stop over the summer or keep going all year through?

Although I've been MIA, I've managed to keep on top of things. It seems that I actually established some good habits and the house has been more organised and clutter free. I still need to give some rooms a proper clean but they are in an acceptable state.

One thing is obvious, I need to get the rest of the family on board? Is this considered advanced level flying though?

done
washing on
dishwasher loaded
bins out
phoned council

to do
finish washing up and unload dishwasher
clear and clean sink
2 -3 wash loads and hang out
make beds
wipe around bathroom - this can wait until next week for a full clean
collect parcel from sorting office
find DS2's phone
make early dinner
fold laundry

Hello! Firmly in full holiday mode finally! (Especially now the sun is out!) And I have put on nearly 1.5 kilos [sob] just since term ended which is all of 2 weeks 2 days!

Back home for two days before heading off to UK again for my niece's birthday because our lovely rabbit sitter/office cleaner/fortnightly ironing lady is in hospital with pancreatitis poor woman. Making alternative arrangements.

Typically, upon arrival home, the only thing dh was interested in last night was the Marks and Sparks suppers we had brought back in a cool bag, not the roof and whether or not there had been any more leaks .

Anyway, two-day sojourn here will give me the chance to catch up on washing and ironing, tend to the garden plants, find alternative rabbit care arrangements, organise friends/godparents for dd's birthday next week, sort arrangements for our 20th wedding anniversary next week (how did that happen?) - war crimes sentence ) - finishing sending off various cards and presents for the multitude of family summer birthdays, supervise the roofers tomorrow and carrying on sorting the boudoir.

And I must try and find my mobile phone. It has completely disappeared and I feel totally lost without it! (And it's fairly new and expensive and I just pray I haven't done one of those maneouvres when one isn't thinking straight and puts a handful of papers destined for the recycling bin in the top drawer where the phone lives, and the mobile phone in the recycling) I can't even use dd's phone (which used to be mine) because she's lost hers as well! I don't think I'm a very good role model somehow ... .

Ta da:
morning routine inc dw, wm, s&s
two phone calls about arrangements for next week and travel in Aug
rabbits (who are very very pleased to see heaps of fresh food me)
mahoosive search for mobile phone part 1 - no success
tidy kitchen from last night, wipe down all surfaces
dining room table hot spot and wipe down
chase dd around the house, corner with large net, persuade her in to large bubble bath, wash hair, cut her nails, stand over her while she cleans her teeth (half way through)

To do:
contact alternative cleaner/rabbit sitter
write three cards and post two of them
buy one bunch of flowers
paint card with dd to celebrate 40th jubilee of priest who is family friend
make roasted veg pasta sauce to use up peppers, garlic, courgettes, toms etc
search for mobile phone again
huge mountain of ironing
dh's shirts to laundry
tend to bits of garden in urgent need
boudoir organisation esp sock drawers
wash dh socks
buy travelling mirror

That should do for now!

A very warm welcome to LairyPoppins and congratulations on your pregnancy. Sounds as though you have a lot on your plate so take it steady [proffers foot stool]

A very warm welcome to Coffeeandcream too!

Great that you have caught up on shut eye Toffee - and fingers crossed for school visit if I am not back on here before tomorrow!

Glad your ds back safe and sound Swan arf about chocolate factory (those tours can be a bit too worthy) Enjoy your lunch with the ladies wot!

Hope you are OK Carpe

V. impressed by your weight loss and running Trazzles congratulations! HOpe your dd is OK and you can get the support you need to ease your understandable fears.

Eyelet good luck with your appeal and sorry you are having to go through that awful battle. Congrats on mega-crisis clean!!

Whoknows many congratulations on your ds becoming Cub of the Year! Good on him (and you!)

Heartfelt sympathies Doodle how very indiscreet of your mother to comment at all. If it's any consolation, my late mil used to look through our personal papers (including financial ones) when we were out. Once we discovered that we never left her alone in the house again!

Alice v. impressed by your continuing home make-over and all of the energy you are putting in to it

Have a fantastic holiday Engels!

Waves to Bitchy Mercury Fraggle Blue Hyperhops and everyone else I have missed.

Had better go and hault dd out of her bath before she turns in to a prune ...

x posts

Waves to Peachandblack Thanks for the sustenance and glad the system is working for you! I think the theory is that family members somehow fall in to Flying when they see us doing it. Not sure it is that simple though (my dh certainly hasn't!). I think good habits do rub off to a certain extent though. However, I think it helps if you leave out your list of routines/control journal in a strategic place (particularly when you are going out yourself or won't be around!! ) or in my case, if I want anything at all done, I have to send a list by e-mail or dh won't even register it.

hault dd out of bath?

haul!

Lawd. How is it possible that a child can spend a full hour and a half in the bath, and wash their hair, and still emerge with breakfast smears around their mouth?