Feisty Fledgling Flyers flutter through Feb with flair, finesse, flaws, failures, fortitude, feedback, fiascos, fabulousness, friendship and fun!

[sanschocolat]

[The fiascos are all mine btw !!]

And just for Just, February is the new January that was the new January before

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (can't have anyone over syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (something that undermines family fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of chat, support and wine and cake along the way.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework, which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It’s up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be inundated! All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
  

• repeat baby steps + do 15 mins a day decluttering in the current zone
  

• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
  

[And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.]

More info here on getting started and Flying lessons. Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings. Don't be put off by the barf-tastic language of the site - the underlying system is sound!

Points to keep in mind:
(1)No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine
(2)You are never behind just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
(3) It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

Humungous thanks to Bitchy for steering us through the hectic January thread and for the wise three-line mantra above.

All regulars, lurkers and newcomers welcome!!

[BitchytheGreat]

To do
up, breakfast, coffees
laundry 1st load on
folding
ironing
empty dw
dw on and running
find kitchen bench
sort through and take out too small clothes
put away done mine
lakeland
tescos can wait until tomo
training kits
find photo paper and teach someone how to print photos
remove toys from lounge that shuldn't be there
wash sofa blanket
take recycling out
Take rubbish out
make birthday cake part 1
remake recipe test from yesterday with new tweaks to it

[JustGettingOnWithIt]

to Bitchy for January, more for SC for Feb and especially "February is the new January that was the new January before"

Cybermum welcome to wagon slipper offer’s anonymous.

Honu lovely to see you.

Bitchy I shouldn’t laugh, but ‘covers completely parallel to the wall/edge of the bed’ got me. Ours was mattress completely parallel to edge of the bed, on fold up bed completely parallel to wall. Still doesn’t like it sliding, but no longer intentionally wakes me dealing with it.

Blue crosses fingers for you.

WhoKnows Happy birthday/party to birthday dc. Hope it goes well.

all Virtual wing flaps.

SC Embarrassingly the tree is still with us,
I didn't get out of hospital 'till late and managed to feed all, listen to friend and dc's and keel. It's now stuck 'till Monday as space wise impossible to do with all here/coming and going. Very best of luck with with weight reduction, today's a new year day.

Will be focusing on Feb as the new Jan but also taking things easy, trying to get the right balance, and waiting on a CT scan as it seems I can't smile or frown symmetrically, as well as eyelid dropped. (Hopefully all down to raging infection and nothing worse.)

Ta da
Finally got some sort of logicalish reasoning out of friend as to why she wants to meet for something practical, but wants to “ofload” Christmas presents onto me, but not accept her own (which i can't afford to post and was too ill to exchange in Dec) at that time. Stupid issue, but one that’s crystallised in me feeling unusually resentful.
Got Ds off only a bit late, to do some work.
Cleared, cleaned out ds's bag which something had leaked in.
Got a friend to collect new prescription for me. (big, not good at asking)

To Do
Symbolically shine both sinks.
Stupidly flattened battery last night, so getting it started, and getting food in, is todays big energy spend. Have managed to get a friend to come and get me out of pit soon, (the judging wont do much for me, but am physically not managing it) and help me achieve it all. (again big for me)
15 min decluttering.
Try dealing with results of last night’s deluge later, if any 'oomph' left.

But as it's Jan Feb 1st, am going to try and write (or at least start) New year month list of exactly what needs attending to, changing, and achieving, by when, what needs to be the priorities, what’s long term wish list, and the year's basic plan.

Fail to plan, plan to fail, and all that.

Feb’s 15 min a day (minimum in our case) decluttering habit couldn’t be better timed.

[JustGettingOnWithIt]

Welcomes isSpring

Crawls under Bitchy's special brew vat drip tap, hopefully.

[BitchytheGreat]

Just you have no idea how pleased I am that it is not just ds with the parallel thing. It is one of those quirks that i have got strict on told him i can't live up to his standards and if he wants it such he has to learn to do it himself. Funnily enough he sometimes lowers his standards but atm does result in "mum can you sort my bed out" "do it yourself" "but mum you need to sort my bed out" "No, do it yourself" "But mum I can't do it, you need to do it for me" "no, you need to learn to do it for yourself" "oh you are so nasty"

Tbh we had one step forwards on the bed cover things, but 2 steps backwards in the toilet thing. How hard is it to remember to flush? Guess it is a case of which battles to pick and is the issue the covers or does he just want reassurance. He has been warned there will be change in his room when he comes back. Hopefully he won't hate it as it might provide a better functioning room although only getting rid of the lego will really achieve that.

[CyberMam]

Right then

ta da
Cleared kitchen after breakfast and lunch
Yesterday's laundry load away
More laundry in progress
Made bed
Swish and swipe
5 mins on 'hotspots' feels like whole house is a hotspot

to do
Clear out fridge so we can defrost
Tidy up excess of paper aeroplanes in living room
Shine sink
15 mins decluttering
Mop hall floor

Best of luck with that list Bitchy
Just well done on asking for help sounds like you need to be kind to yourself right now

[sanschocolat]

Sorry - loads of interruptions - making this a rather belated post.

I said I would check on the Flylady website about the slightly unusual zone issue in such a short month and sure enough we only have one day in Zone 1 this and next month here and here.

I guess that clears up definitively the issue of whether we should be doing zone work at weekends or not . Sorry - I was totally wrong about this as usual! . Will definitely include zones in weekend links from now on! Think there could be more clarity on the website though!

For clarity's sake, here is today's flight plan.

[Think Flylady must have a spy camera on my front door/entrance porch. It is definitely NOT making me smile at the moment. So much building work in the street I have given up trying to keep on top of the dust all over the front door and windows and the sand being tramped in to the house.]

For newcomers/lurkers this is the theory about preserving Sats for family fun although I'm not entirely convinced; those of you who work long hours during the wk may not be either (although Flylady does concede that you may have to do home blessing on Sats if you work f/t)!

[sanschocolat]

Argh - so many phone calls during the time I was writing that - loads of x
posts!!

[DD gone to one of those swimming centres with shoots and islands and fountains (whatever they are called) with a friend and so dh and I are making the most of our time alone having a wonderfully romantic time in the office trying to sort out paperwork related to new T.V.A. rules; but fatal if clients get wind of you being in on a Saturday because they tend to ring you up [sigh] ]

[Lines up behind Just in queue for special brew - ta Bitchy]

A very warm welcome to IsSpringSprangedYet (love the nn btw) Good luck with your list!

Love the 'tidy up excess of paper aeroplanes' on your list Cybermam

"Feb’s 15 min a day (minimum in our case) decluttering habit couldn’t be better timed." My thoughts exactly Just! So much c**p to wade through here, it is depressing. Really great to see that you have lined up some help for yourself; although I know it's not something that comes easily to you. Hope CT appt arrives quickly! (And no need to feel embarrassed about tree, you were in hospital fhs!!!!!)

[Swanhildapirouetting]

done
ds2 football
catechism class - me teaching learning
Grocery shopping for a few items
ds2 baptism homework (thank goodness for the catechists' workbook is all I can say, as it answered all the questions ]
dealt brilliantly with dd in foul mood although I say it myself!!! These parenting manuals are helping at long last. Dh unfortunately then decided to tell her off about something unrelated which resulted in her blowing another gasket, but he is now helping her paint her desk so the aggro has abated.

Tomorrow I am going on a solo trip to see a friend in Somerset on the train, so I need to be a bit more organised today. unlikely.

[Swanhildapirouetting]

SC flume was the word you were looking for I think We have a centre near us called the Coral Reef. Ds2 is begging me to take him back there (they went on a school trip) I must say it sounds v inviting at this time of year, a tropical island is exactly what I crave.

[waves bananas and coconuts around menacingly]

Okay, I had better go and extract ds2 from Storage Hunters and make him do some more homework [sigh]
then I'm going to have a nap again

[BitchytheGreat]

To do
up, breakfast, coffees
laundry 3rd load on
folding up to date
ironing
empty dw
dw on and running
find kitchen bench
sort through and take out too small clothes
put away done mine
lakeland
tescos can wait until tomo
training kits
find photo paper and teach someone how to print photos
remove toys from lounge that shuldn't be there
wash sofa blanket
take recycling out
Take rubbish out
make birthday cake part 1 in oven
brown bread rolls sat on side proffing until cake comes out of oven
remake recipe test from yesterday with new tweaks to it in bread machine

[BitchytheGreat]

Oh dear god that list is consfusing can't see what is left so well.

[IsSpringSprangedYet]

Thanks sans. Had it for two springs now.

Ta Da:
cleared three of five chairs
sorted and packed away toys in play room bit

To Do:
Have a coffee!!!!

[ToffeeWhirl]

Ta da

Lie in (delegated the usual early start to DH )
B/fast
Bath
Washing up
Put load of washing on
Strip DS2's bed and replace with clean sheets for DM
Welcome DM (staying with us for the weekend)
Lovely, long, restful time in the hairdressers (cut & colour)
Pub lunch with family (although DS1 couldn't come because too anxious - not entirely unexpected)
Caught in hail storm on way home
Bought ice cream for DS2 because it's all he can eat (tooth still hanging on )
Made pizza for DS1
Cuddled DS2 on sofa whilst watching 'Minecraft' videos
May have nodded off

About to make lentil and carrot soup in the slow cooker for this evening.

How come I actually managed to have over eight hours' sleep last night, instead of the usual six, and I actually feel more tired now than I did before?

[JustGettingOnWithIt]

Ducks Swan's flying fruit.

So far only list making, accidental sleeping, and attempted de-cluttering of what I can reach around bed is happening. Friend still not here and the day’s ticking past. [frustrated emoticon]

Bitchy With ds I always saw it as generalised anxiety manifested ocd style, in something that could be controlled. No idea if it’s right or not, but treating it as that seemed to keep us both sane.(ish!) Bit over a decade ago the advice I got was it's controlling behaviour by boy's of lone mums and should be ignored, even if it caused them acute distress.

At first I bought into maybe he was just trying to control me, then more likely seeking reassurance, but while there may have been some level of that when little, as he got older it was clearly him vs bed vs going to sleep believing all was 'settled', but he found it hard to do himself when younger and his logic was I could do it easily and it was hard work for him especially when tired.

I did say it was a ritual/need that he had and needed to learn to manage, but if he was visibly exhausted or becoming frustrated would assist by doing it together. As he got more capable he automatically did it himself.

He does have extremely poor proprioception, and I’ve often wondered where some of the ocdish 'things must be laid out so', 'lined up against', ends, and the need to be able to reach for something without disaster, or ‘place himself,’ (settee, table, bed, car etc) begins, or if that's a red herring.

Weighted bedding and magnets has helped a bit (also with disturbed sleep) but he falls out of bed frequently and easily (all 6.5 ft now) so destroys the symmetry he feels he needs for sleep. He also throws his bedding off then lies there whimpering in his sleep, until I can’t bear it, and either grabber his bedding back onto him or throw whatever I have over him, because I’m hardwired it’s too plaintive disturbing me, to be ignored and he'll eventually roll out seeking it anyway.

All battles do indeed need picking, but if it helps we use a home made seven piece articulated laminated A4 macaton sign that dangles over the door handle (forcing you to lift it to get at handle) to help prompt our bigger difficulties lass with 'the 3 W's' : wipe, wash hands, whizz it away (flush) before trying to leave.

[BitchytheGreat]

The door handle sign assumes that ds remembers to shut the door in the first place

No that makes perfect sense. Ds is also very mobile in his sleep so I can see exactly the situation you are describing. He is incredibly tactile so his blanket from blanketgate, and one which is supersoft for when he is stressed/feeling off are key. We do use a lot of sensory cues for him to help calm him. I am hoping of reducing the visual clutter as well as the physical clutter in ds' room that he can have a space that is more calming for him. I think the sitting inside his wardrobe thing was a version of needing to sit in a box to feel safe. Hopefully having the space and easy access to his box again he will not need to sit in the wardobe.

The cake has not quite turned out how i intended. But i think it will mean i can avoid having to make a 2nd one to achieve the shape i wanted.

[EustaciaVye]

swan - it is possible we are very close. I dont want to out myself so can you pm me where you live

[EustaciaVye]

swan - I love storage hunters

sans - tq for energising vibes. I have done everything I planned today even though it was not very much

[GoingGoingGoth]

Well I'm posting although I've not done much today.

Done
Beds
Buggered off to the city on my own to met other MNers for crotchet/knitting & lunch
Quick trip to John Lewis to get more wool
Home via Morrisons to get food for dinner
Dinner

To Do
Washing up
Ironing
Laundry on.

Will be trying to get back on to MFP on Monday, weather permitting (if it's cold/wet there is just no point in me trying to calorie count)

I'm fighting the urge to hibernate, especially as I had an allergic reaction to something yesterday and now have a blotchy face

[BitchytheGreat]

Okay my to do list now looks like this:
Put toys away in ds' room
Put books away in ds' room
Put ds' clothes away
Photo paper out of loft
training kit sorting
Cook retry of recipe - it is currently sat on side rising
figure out what to do with knicknacks in ds' room
ds' bedding

Everything else has been done and more besides. I am really chuffed with this and will be taking refuge in a hot deep bath shortly. But need to finish the inprogress stuff first.

[JustGettingOnWithIt]

Think it's safe to say friend isn't showing up!

Bitchy if wanted, a light overhead fire door closer solves the door closing problem (and lingering spreading pongs) though it does mean they have to realise outside home. (not applicable for her, and he's too worried to leave it open.) Ours was £7, and is light enough not to hurt fingers, but it ended a lot of sibling 'issues.'

Ds still (and unashamedly) loves a good box, wardrobe, or enclosed space, they just need to be bigger these days.

Wish you better than I managed over visual clutter, we’ve fought over it as he's dreadful and a total hoarder and has always fought my attempts at keeping things uncluttered and visually calmer, yet expresses a real preference for minimalism, clean lines, admires clear uncluttered spaces, and minimalist architecture.

[WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes]

Evening all,

Party went well, really well in fact, one of the easiest we've ever done (apart from one of the boys losing his temper with another, entirely predictably). It was 10-pin bowling, and the place organised and supervised the whole thing, all we had to do was stand back and lend a hand with shoe changing, pouring drinks etc. DS had a great time, and we came home and have just had pizza in front of the telly, a lazy day really. I'm tired though. Zero Flying, apart from one load of washing done this morning. Haven't read all the posts, will try and catch up tomorrow.

[BitchytheGreat]

Weird creatures aren't they just

[elliepac]

Was coming on to post about a lovely day. Good bit of flying this morning followed by DN's 1st birthday party this afternoon.

However, we received a phone call an hour ago to say that FIL has passed away. He hadn't been in great shape for a while but still a bit of a shock. DH gone out to be with his brothers and sisters (FIL and MIL not been together since dH was 10). Got to find some way of telling DC's tomorrow.

[Swanhildapirouetting]

Horrid evening!!!!! grrrr.
Dh complained that the oven chips weren't cooked and we had a row!!!!
FGS - the easiest laziest supper in the world should not have led to a row.

I can only conclude that my darling husband has control issues over food, rather like those of our middle son He also complained that the food was not piled on his plate properly [double

Sometimes fussy people annoy me intensely, as I love things like eels, rhubarb, fat on lamb chops, bacon rinds, cabbage and I do not want to be bossed around over OVEN CHIPS which I have only provided because everyone else is so fussy

However I was very touched by the way the children told me my food was delicious, not liking his tone, so I suppose there is a lesson learned there, that complaining about food upsets the cook!!!

[Swanhildapirouetting]

Oh ellie I'm so sorry for your DH. hope they can all talk a lot about him and remember everything good.