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Housekeeping

Find cleaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Housekeeping forum.

Original poster

does the state of your house ever get you down?

108 replies

alittlebitshy · 04/06/2006 16:19

if so sign up here and reassure me.

I'm quite a "clean" person, and don;t like mess, but by nature we have a fairly cluttered home cos we have lots of books, dd has lots of toys and we're just not cut our for the show house-home that a few of my friends have Envy.

right now it's getting me down. it always seems to need hoovering, the kitchen always looks as if it is a few days post it's cleaning day (again, it's neat but cluttered, and i clean up and put away as i go along but it never looks as nice and minimalist as so many i see. plus it is deffo not new and trendy.

there is a strange smell in our porchy bit. my mum reckons it eminates from dh's stdy (I never clean it, it is his domain, and he is a messy so and so and the thought of it frightens me plus he is always working in it so i can never get the time when i have the time iyswim, even if i felt so inclined).

it is getting me down... mainly this nelwly appointed scent.

argh.

i wonder if people think i live in an utter hole. I don't think i do, i try and keep it clean and as tidy as i can, but i don;t think i'm good enough. waaaaaaaah.

c'mon, make me feel less of a slattern.

OP posts:
tyedye · 06/06/2006 12:27

At least dust-bunnies dont need feeding!Grin

ProfYaffle · 06/06/2006 18:21

Angeliz - I was going to do that but never did, I'm just too lazy. Hmmm, I think I see a pattern emerging ....

mozarellamamma · 07/06/2006 10:36

I always feel as though I'm not getting things as spic and span as I'd like. But I like to play with my baby and unless I just use her nap times to do chores which I don't always want to do as I like to phone a mate or have a shower or you know do something for myself then it's just really difficult to fit it all in. I remember when I was a kid of often going to sleep with the steaming sound of the iron going in the background as my mum fitted in ironing shirts after her long day of sorting stuff out. Well I'd like there to be more to my life than just that - maybe that means I'm greedy? I'd still love a home that looks like Elle Deco but I guess I want other stuff too. Sorry I'm really late to this thread by the way...x

meowmix · 07/06/2006 10:41

CONSTANTLY but even more so at the mo because we're packing up everything pre a move and taking out shelving etc. So there are piles of junk everywhere. Also DH is great at starting sorting out a room and then leaving it half done and starting on another.

I find it really really stressful so am snappy bitch from hell these days. On the plus side I'm taking the expat stance of binning stuff mercilessly.

EmmaKB · 07/06/2006 11:31

Just noticed this thread and I have to admit that I feel as though I live in a tip. baby equipment makes my house look so untidy. Plus toys, washing etc. By the time I have tidied up washed the dishes, made up the bottles and put laundry in the machine not to mention cooked meals etc I never seem to find the time to have a good clean of the rooms. I am finding it much harder with a new baby. It gets depressing especially because I am on maternity leave and I have to look at the mess day in day out and can't do anything about it without leaving baby/toddler to cry or send them to a relative for the day. I want to spend my time off work enjoying quality time with my kids (which is tho purpose of maternity leave isn't it). I don't feel that I am doing this as just doing the minimum of essential housework, in between feeds and the school run, is taking me all day.

mozarellamamma · 08/06/2006 14:06

EmmaKB - completely agree. I've always been a bit of a cleaning minx and am rather sadly exctied by towers of fluffy towels and shiny sinks - I even signed up to flylady.net which is this funny homemaking site in the US - it just did my head in cos I couldn't make the grade. Boxes are the thing - nice lidded ones ideally - wherever there's toys scoop em in at the end of the day and at least you feel as though it's neater. I know I'm kidding myself - once upon a time the floors were washed once a week and the house dusted every day and that's when I worked full full time. Now don't let's get on to the state of my non pedi'd feet. Poor hubby must think he swapped his lady for a tramp! Wink

Serendippity · 08/06/2006 14:21

I vacume every morning, luchtime and evening after dd goes to bed, always tidy her toys and clean the kitchen with wipes etc 3 times a day. I make the bed every day but otherwise only take the hoover up the stairs and clean the bathroom once a week..i hate cleaning upstairs!
The conservotory only gets minimal treatment as well..it's a bit of a dumpiong ground tbh :)
..and yeah it does get me down sometimes, but hey that's having kids and i wouldn't change dd for a sparkling house :)

confusedandaffraid · 09/06/2006 08:29

Frequently. Especially now I have 3 days to clean it from top to bottom for a social services visit courtesy of a well meaning friend who thought it would be the best way to get me the help I needed. How can reporting a woman whith PND to social services for having an untidy houe and allegedly not feeding her children correctly help?

The social worker could see that the kids are not neglected and that they are very much loved but has threatened environmental health involvement if I can't show significant improvement by Monday.

peanutbutter · 09/06/2006 09:13

confusedandafraid i feel Sadand worried for you. do you have any help or support at all? what about your pnd - have you seen your gp and are you getting help? so the social worker is coming back to inspect on monday - they surely can't expect you to have the house gleaming from top to bottom....just how bad is it? whereabouts do you live?

tyedye · 09/06/2006 09:29

who needs friends like thatShockgood luck!Smile

peanutbutter · 09/06/2006 12:35

confusedandafraid - are you around?

confusedandaffraid · 09/06/2006 13:17

Just popping in to check whilst I grab lunch.

confusedandaffraid · 09/06/2006 13:18

Live in west mids.

Had severe PND and let everything get on top of me so yes I suppose it was that bad. My immediate fammily are rallying round to help.

peanutbutter · 09/06/2006 14:20

so they're helping you get the house a bit more straight? what about day to day support with the house and the children? are you doing this on your own?
I searched on your name and see you're familiar with mumsnet (wondered if you were new and was going to tell you what great advice and support you would be given here).
Hope things go okay with the social worker on monday - it sounds like you need some good support.

JackieNo · 09/06/2006 14:22

Glad you've got some help with the housework, confusedandafraid, and hope it all goes well on MondaySmile.

Cadmum · 09/06/2006 14:32

Confusedandafraid: I am so sorry to read that your 'friend' has done this to you. How scary and awful. Would it not have been easier for her to offer practical help or a gift certificate for a cleaning lady?!?

I wish I was closer as I would gladly offer to help either with the house or the children. That is what a compassionate person would do. I hope that Monday goes well...

In answer to the original question: Our flat is UP-side-DOWN most of the time.

Clean but NEVER tidy.

My Grandma (whose house would have passed a white glove inspection 7 days a week when I was a child) had this verse cross stitched in a frame on the wall:

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait for tomorrow,
For babies grow up, I've learned, to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.

confusedandaffraid · 09/06/2006 14:40

Thanks everyone.

Dh works days, I work nights both sets of grandparents are working full time they give what help and support they can but I still seem to struggle and if one more person tells me to pull myself together I will scream.

Cadmum · 09/06/2006 15:55

Who is suggesting that you should pull yourself together? Surely not your friends? How can you pull yourself together with serious PND and a night job?

confusedandaffraid · 09/06/2006 16:45

There are a few people out there who do not understand what it is like to suffer from depression and think that it is as simple as "pulling yourself together and to stop wallowing in self pity" words of wisdom from dh's aunt to FIL and myself recently.

Have got kitchen and bathroom looking something like. Have put away all the toys in kids bedroom and am working through washing mountain. Thank god the weather is good other wise I dread to think what I would do to try and sort that out by monday. Just our room and the livingroom now. living room shouldn't take to long but dread to think what it is going to take to sort out our room as It has been used as a dumping ground for everything that has been moved out of the way of the kids.

mozarellamamma · 09/06/2006 19:22

At the risk of being shouted at I think hoovering three times a day is a bit excessive - or am I the only slattern here.

confusedandafraid I hope you're also getting the emotional support that you need as well as some practical cleaning help my love.

I have a pile of at least 30 shirts of my hubby's winking at me in the basket and I feel wound up that I don't get round to hoovering more that once a week - tho the bathroom gets washed daily and the house dusted a few days a week and the kitchen sorted daily. I thought this was normal plus ragging the head off my fella for not doing owt apart from the cat's tray.

Is anyone else a bit like this?

confusedandaffraid · 10/06/2006 09:33

Thanks everyone for the support and encoragement.

Think we can finally see the wood through the trees iyswim.

Mum has been golden and has been here everyday helping me to get moving.

DH has been helping to.

MIL has had the children so that they aren't neglected whilst the work is being done.

Have house to myself this morning as DH still has to go teaching, kids are at granma's so now I have eaten breakfast, unloaded dishwasher and put some clothes in the washing machine I am off to get on with putting all the clean washing from yesterday away and strip the beds.

They wanted a significant improvement I am going to try and give them more than that I am not going to let this malicious s*d beat me.

Have made a list of jobs that still need doing and am crossing them off as they are achieved.

Will post an update on Monday as to how it all went.

tyedye · 10/06/2006 10:14

Good luck!Smilemy house is a hole on a regular ba.sis,i dont believe its possible to mother fully when your wondering if your u-bend is sparkling,i hoover twice a week,rarely upstairs,which is horrible,i never iron,we arent a smart family,i have tricks up my sleeve for hanging things so they dry neat!we dont look like dropouts,our nails are clean

JackieNo · 10/06/2006 11:17

Good on you, confusedandafraidSmile. Thinking of you.

Cadmum · 11/06/2006 17:06

Well done confused and afraid! I am very impressed. Let's hope that SS agree tomorrow.

006 · 11/06/2006 17:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.