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Housekeeping

Find cleaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Housekeeping forum.

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Original poster

if you had people you didnt know coming to stay...

65 replies

OnlyWantsOne · 05/11/2010 11:09

what would you do to the house to prepare?

DP has invited his friends round tonight to stay

am 37 weeks PG and have a 4 year old, 2 cats, and an 18 week old lab puppy.

House is organised and kinda tidy, apart from the odd toy and sofa needing putting back nicely and plumping.

Im exhausted, is running the hoover around ok? I cant muster the energy for much else.

Shall make up their bed when DD in bath later, they not coming till 8

DP wont be home til then either so cant ask him to do any thing

urgh

OP posts:

Original poster

OnlyWantsOne · 05/11/2010 15:11

but if I dont act the way I would normally (prepare dinner, guest bed, house up to scratch) DP will wonder why but wont say any thing, infact, doubt he would notice, he certainly wouldnt do any thing himself, and I dont want the guests to think Im a complete slattern.

And I feel really embarrased thinking about it.

OP posts:

mousymouse · 05/11/2010 15:27

only just take your dp to one side when he is home and hand him a list of the things he needs to do, as you will retire to bed early because you don't feel well.

systemsaddict · 05/11/2010 15:32

At 37 weeks I would be so tempted to keep having 'is this it' contractions all weekend to freak them out seriously there is no obligation for you to do anything at this point! he has arranged it he needs to clean house, arrange food or takeaway and entertain them while you rest as much as possible.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 05/11/2010 15:32

What a prat.

What time are they due to arrive?

Obviously he won't be able to drink more than a glass with them either, incase you go into early labour. He hasn't thought it through at all, has he?

Definitely don't cook though - takeaway all the way.

coatgate · 05/11/2010 15:37

Men - no bloody idea. Don't do anything, lie on the sofa looking pale and interesting and get your DH to order a takeaway.

RTKangaMummy · 05/11/2010 15:39

Put the clean sheets next to the bed and then say when you show them to their room

"oh sorry I meant to make this up for you but I needed to go downstairs to get 4 year old a drink or take to the loo or let puppy out etc and I completely forgot to come back to do it ~ silly pregnancy babybrain!!!"

As long as the toilet, bathroom mirror and washbasin are clean I'm sure no one will notice anything else & if they do then that is their problem

If you want you could spray furniture polish in the air or on a raditator (if you have heating on) cos that will make them think you have polished

Deffo get a takeaway

And you are right you will probably enjoy their company

But IMHO your DP is a plonker

thumbwheel · 05/11/2010 15:45

Don't put yourself out for people you've never met. You are 37w pg, you have plans, your DP has made these arrangements so he can just suck it up and deal with the hospitality side of things.

Make it clear to these guests that you are not able to do the "good hostess" act under these circumstances.

And I wouldn't bank on your DP holding back on the drinking either...

LoveBeingAMummy · 05/11/2010 15:49

Defo do not cook, in fact it looks like thats a mumsnet order

Make up the bed, clean the bathroom, clean towels and hoover if you can.

Lotkinsgonecurly · 05/11/2010 16:05

Guests will understand you are pg and not expect you to sort everything out. Get bedding out but let dh make and sort bed.
Order a takeaway, have nice bottle of wine in fridge for guests. All they'll care about is glass of wine etc. Make lounge and loos tidy they'll adore puppy, kitten and dd!

Lotkinsgonecurly · 05/11/2010 16:06

Forgot to add, accidentally give dh reality call at somepoint soon. Let him have a trial run looking after everything while you in hospital having next dc.

Or say stomach pains on Sunday morning and you can't get out of bed!

HystericalMe · 05/11/2010 16:06

let him know all this!
say you are hormonal and might just scream it all at the guests. He will send you up to bed to rest.

fel1x · 05/11/2010 16:10

Just doent do it!!

You say DH wont notice, but he will have to notice if theres no dinner. Just say 'lets order takeaway, what do you fancy?' and put the clean sheets in his hand for spare room and say IN FRONT OF HIS GUESTS 'you dont mind popping these on the bed in the spare room while I get DD to bed do you darling?'

Then theres nothing left for you to do!

Chatelaine · 05/11/2010 16:19

I agree with Lotkinsgonecurly. Don't over do it, put bedding out but don't do the making up of the bed. Try and enjoy the company and relax, if they are decent people then they will be more than willing to pull their weight and you should let them. That can be really nice and a good start to a friendship. They will be in awe of you, as they are just starting out. Be confident and ask for help when you need it, it's more companionable that way. Good luck with the baby.

Chatelaine · 05/11/2010 16:21

It's the art of delegation.

notyummy · 05/11/2010 16:26

Second what everyone says about clean bedding in the room. Check that toilets are clean. Wine in fridge, takeaway on speed dial. Do hoovering if you feel up to it.

Make DH know he is in your DEBT and you will be expecting some major favours.

Lurpak · 05/11/2010 16:29

Whizz hoover round. Make beds. Splodge of cleaner down to loos.

Quick tea for DD

Beers/wine in to chill

DD to bed

Take Away

Please do remember to give DH a slap round the face at some point when they're not looking

JenaiMarrHePlaysGuitar · 05/11/2010 16:43

DH needs to sort the bedding - by all means dig it out of the drawers but don't actually make up the beds.

Foodwise, a takeaway is in order.

I wouldn't bother vacuuming.

hatwoman · 05/11/2010 16:48

I disagree with bedding in the room. that still cuts dh out of it. I would even disagree with handing dh the bedding (which implies that it's your department, you know where it's kept, know which bedding to use etc). just say to dh the bed needs doing.

if he then has to ask, rather sheepishly, which sheets to use, or where you keep them. all the better. it might make him realise that he's not really pulling his weight.

from your post about cooking and stuff it sounds like you do more than your fair share. I think you need to be explicit in letting him know this (not necessarily infront of guests etc) but in general.

MiniMarmite · 05/11/2010 17:06

and you are going to have a newborn and a toddler plus pets in a few weeks so he needs to get used to the idea of getting used to doing a bit more to help you anyway.

Original poster

OnlyWantsOne · 05/11/2010 19:17

ahhhhh ladies

good evening

dp missed the 6.30 train home so will be home at 8pm - same time guests arriving.

I got home, cooked DD diner, played with puppy, hoovered and washed floors down stairs, cooked chilli (have just put jacket pots in oven too)

have wine in fridge

guest bed made while I bathed DD

fresh towels on their bed too

tidied sitting room and put away toys

DD is now watching a DVD and Im going to go and have a shower.

Im very fucking cross.

With myself mainly for being such a total walk over. Again.

Its odd, last week I put fresh bedding on spare bed, ready for when I go into labour and my SIL is coming to stay (shes my doula, shes a MW)

it doesnt occour to DP that him having pals to stay means more than tonight, it means another load of washing, ironing, cooking

OP posts:

MiniMarmite · 05/11/2010 19:28

Hi OWO

Well, don't be angry with yourself, you just like things to be a certain way when you have guests are coming...even if they shouldn't be coming.

Just make sure DH knows how inconsiderate he has been.

I hope the visit goes well xxx

northerngirl41 · 05/11/2010 19:36

Unexpected guests in my house = "I'm so sorry darling, I have a prior engagement" and then I rapidly book cinema tickets and evict myself from my own house. That way it's up to him to deal with food/beds etc. and I get a nice treat into the bargain. Plus I don't see the look of disgust on their faces when they discover dirty washing up or clothes draped all over the place.

The rule is that he needs to ask me if he wants me to go somewhere or do something - I am not his personal property, and I do have my own life. Likewise if I need him to do something I ask before I agree to it with other people - it's just being polite.

Having said that, it's usually not that bad in our house as I always have the spare room pristine and LOCKED (yes, we have locks on the doors to prevent mad cats and curious children!). Not perhaps an option for everyone, but really very effective!

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 05/11/2010 19:42

Make him do the washing/ironing/pay for an ironing person to do the ironing.

And make sure he knows that he will be sleeping in the dogs kennel if he EVER does anything like this to you again!!

mousymouse · 05/11/2010 19:42

only please make him do the laundry afterwards at least.

Original poster

OnlyWantsOne · 05/11/2010 20:08

ahhhh yes but if he does the laundry, I will end up re doing it

im a control freak arent i...

they're not here yet.

Ive had a lovely hot shower, hair done, make up, clothes that fit snugly show off my bump

i am so tired i will take DD to bed, and probably not come back down.

which isnt unlike me to be fair!!

OP posts:

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