Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Home ed

Find advice from other parents on our Homeschool forum. You may also find our round up of the best online learning resources useful.

Original poster

Home education support thread

116 replies

AMumInScotland · 15/01/2008 15:10

A positive thread for parents who are home educating, those considering home education, and all others who want to contribute to the discussion.

But taking as a starting point the fact that Home Education is an equally valid choice, taken by parents for a variety of reasons, and is not illegal, immoral or fattening....

OP posts:
juuule · 17/01/2008 11:33

Sue - I suppose that's why it's so upsetting.
Perhaps they'll come round with a bit of time.

ilove8pm · 17/01/2008 11:53

as they have previously been supportive, is there something else behind this change of attitude maybe? something totally separate from your family but they are directing their anger towards you instead? jsut seems odd that people who had been supportive could change their attitude so dramatically. dont really know you at all, but keeping you in my thoughts today, dont let them wear you down

SueBaroo · 17/01/2008 12:34

There's no anger, they're really placid and rational, and it appears they just had some assumption about HE that they never told us about.

Ah well, can't be helped. They're visiting this evening, so I'm trying to find the carpet

Original poster
AMumInScotland · 17/01/2008 12:54

The housework thing is such an insult - our homes are an extension of ourselves (not just women, men too) - so a negative comment about how we keep the house is a negative about our standards and entire attitude to life.

For most people with small children, their houses (like the rest of life) tend to be messy but full of love. And most of us reckon that's a good thing!

OP posts:
Julienoshoes · 17/01/2008 13:06

If a home is an extension of ourselves then I am very happy with the description of my self
'Tends to be a bit messy but full of love'

I guess that is exactly how my children stepchildren and stepgrandchildren AND all of the HE teens who come here to stay for a few days at a time would say about me.

And in the end that is what is important, not what anyone else thinks.

I do know one or two pristine tidy houses belonging to home educators-but I know literally hundreds of home educators
-a house that is full to the brim with 'stuff' is one that is alive and an education is bursting out of!

discoverlife · 17/01/2008 18:39

As a message of hope to those wondering if HE works especially for those children traumatised by school.
Its been a short but bumpy ride, 4 days ago I was wondering if I had done the right thing, today I had proof that is was.
At the end of last term we had noted that DS2 had not had a single day when he hadn't come home in tears and been in tears for a while after school, sometimes hours after. Today after only 2 weeks of Home Educating, he went up to DH and asked 'what are we doing tomorrow Dad?' DH answered 'I think we will use the microscope' The reply was ' Yipee, can I get it out now'.
My happy, bright (but SEN because of Cerebral Palsey), inquisative boy is back.

fullmoonunit · 17/01/2008 18:53

I'm clocking in as a supporter and one-day wannabe (when woor booat comes in...)

Spoke to my mum today about my pipe-dream of taking ds1 out and she totally gets it. My brother suffered at school with dyeslexia and that spurred her on to train later as a dyslexia tutor. Sadly she is too infirm to actively help but it's comforting to know that she would be a supportive ally if I was in a position to take the plunge.

Dh is currently job hunting so if he gets anything decent, I might be able to look at some way forward.
DS is 10 and has hated school every day with a passion since nursery school days. He cries for days at the end of every school holiday.
I just don't see it ever getting any better at any secondary school.

Saturn74 · 17/01/2008 18:58

FMF - just tried to CAT you, but it won't accept it. Are you registered for CAT, and if so, under which username?

emmaagain · 17/01/2008 19:10

Humphrey that is a completely unintelligible post

how can we help you get your boat in, fullmoonunit. We'll brainstorm that boat into harbour given half a chance

fullmoonunit · 17/01/2008 19:12

HC, I can't remember. I think you may have to cat me as fullmoonunit today!

fullmoonunit · 17/01/2008 19:15

I have been avidly reading the 'other' HE thread with much interest. I'm not enjoying the generalisation that HE=Anti-School. I loved school. My younger son loves school and is thriving. It's a great school. It's just not right for my older son at all. HC, the £56k dyslexia school would be perfect, wouldn't it?
Or that Summerhills place...(summerlands?)

fullmoonfiend · 17/01/2008 19:20

sorry Humph, I am back as one of me now. Was just showing solidarity to Frank Zappa fans...

Saturn74 · 17/01/2008 19:34

FMF - have sent CAT.

That boarding school looks wonderful.
Even though I'm not sure if I would want them to board.
But they could try it and see.

Now we just have to find the £112K PA!

(I even sent off for a prospectus and video, in anticipation of a huge lottery win! )

Saturn74 · 17/01/2008 19:35

"Humphrey that is a completely unintelligible post"

Emmaagain - I have lost count of how many times I've been told that!

Original poster
AMumInScotland · 18/01/2008 19:52

SueBaroo - just thinking about the unsupportive family - if it is about conformity, and "mind your own business" isn't really an option (I'm assuming their good-will has value for you), is there anything your boys could do which might seem to "take on board" their concerns? I'm thinking things like scouts or team sports, which are usually thought to encourage a positive kind of attitude... there was a comment elsewhere about rugby coaches requiring obedience... not that I'd push rugby in particular!

Depends if you want to do anything to play along with their views of course, I don't mean to suggest that they need that kind of thing to improve their education

OP posts:
SueBaroo · 19/01/2008 17:31

He's only 1 year old! Dh thinks we should just nod and smile until he's a lot older, and just ride the criticism out.

I think I'm going to be off MN now for a bit - I'm massively tearful right now, and my confidence has taken a real bashing, and reading threads about how great school is aren't helping .

Saturn74 · 19/01/2008 17:43

Oh Sue, don't go!

Julienoshoes · 19/01/2008 17:44

SueBaroo
As I just said on the other thread

"You'd think all these home ed teenagers that are coming out of school, would be desperate to get back in there knowing all these 'amazing things' are on offer!"

Now I wonder why the exodus is coming this way and not that if school is so great?

Why are kids and their families voting with their feet?

And everybody acknowledges that HE is a growing movement- certainly all the LAs seem to be saying so and the Government.

Now why would that be happening if school is as great as some posters would have us believe?

Saturn74 · 19/01/2008 17:45

And it doesn't matter what others believe.
If you know you are doing what is best for your child/children at this time in their lives, then that's fine!

ilove8pm · 19/01/2008 18:00

hi SueBaroo. just wanted to say that your gentle and honest posts have been reallty encouraging to me while I have lurked on HE threads in recent times, and I hope things start improving for you soon. x

juuule · 19/01/2008 18:01

Sue - don't go off. Take it from me, if there's one thing schools are good at it's self promotion. However, the reality hardly ever lives up to the brochure. Or that's been my experience over the years. I have children in school and out. I think that Home-ed is a much more holistic approach to education. It has it's difficulties, mostly due to other people's lack of comprehension of how it works but I do think that with a committed parent it can't help but be the better option. Don't lose faith in yourself. And don't be thrown off your chosen path by the glossy brochure advertising of schools.

Original poster
AMumInScotland · 19/01/2008 18:07

Sue - sorry it's getting you down so much. I didn't realise he was just 1! I hope you don't feel you have to keep away - I've made a decision to just stop reading some of the threads on here, as they're bugging me rather a lot, but "bugging me" is all as I'm not having hassles in RL to make me feel bad.

I'm fighting the urge to start a "Why schools and HE are both fine in their own ways and we should all just take a deep breath and respect each other's decisions" thread, but I suspect it would just fan the flames and I'm hoping it'll all just calm down again soon....

OP posts:
Stopfighting · 19/01/2008 22:37

Hi,

I've been home educating my 11 year old DD since September.

It's going well, but some days I feel we don't 'accomplish' enough which makes me feel guilty that I may be failing her.

I'd like to know how many of you follow some kind of timetable and how you allow for flexibility, eg doing spur of the moment things like going out for a couple of hours

fillthatnappylittlekiwi · 19/01/2008 23:46

we took our 4 eldest out of school and nursery ( 10,8,3,2) and this is the second time we've removed the eldest 2. I know it's the right thing to do for them. when they went back into school a year and a term ago they had a great time but slowly they started to get bored and were unchallenged. Now they're getting back their sparks. This time I'm a lot wiser and know I wont be expecting a lot of written work and they are learning their own things at their own much accelerated rate
School is best for those who are suited and HE is best for those who are HE suited. For us HE is best.

Stopfighting · 20/01/2008 13:28

Bump