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Home ed

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Original poster

"I would absolutely advise you against HE your son!"

41 replies

Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:05

I would value your opinions about something a Health Visitor said to me today

We were discussing how I can best help my ds who is 5 - he has aspergers (I also have dd who is 2) Recently I have been wondering about HE . I mentioned that I had been wondering to health visitor who said

"I would absolutely advise you against HE your son"

I didnt know how to react to that one. I should add that I am a single parent living in a semi rural area and I dont drive (so obviously a few extra difficulties there - But I dont think that justifies what she said)

What do you think?

OP posts:
wotzsaname · 05/03/2007 22:08

Did you ask her way she thought that?

Caligula · 05/03/2007 22:11

I think she's probably as qualified to talk about HE as she is about breastfeeding.

But perhaps I'm uncharitable.

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:12

No I didnt Im quite ashamed to say I shuffled in my seat and said I was only thinking about it..........

OP posts:
Saturn74 · 05/03/2007 22:13

Has she got a lot of experience of home education?
I think you need to ask her why she said that if you value her opinion.
Perhaps she is not the best person to advise on this issue?
There are lots of single parents home educating children with special needs.
Have a look at the education otherwise website if you haven't already been there.
There is a Yahoo chat group for home educating single parents, so it might be worth posting on that.

wotzsaname · 05/03/2007 22:16

Don't let a visitor in your home intimidate you again.
Stop shuffling now. You only want to provide the best for you ds and the HV should have been more supportive.

Im sure some advice will follow soon, I have no experience of your situation, but you have my support.

PavlovtheCat · 05/03/2007 22:16

lol Caligula!

colditz · 05/03/2007 22:17

Let her advise away. You can advise he to qualify her remarks. Everyone is allowed to advise.

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:19

I wasnt actually talking to her at home - so not shuffling in my seat - someone elses!

I actually wasnt consulting her advise about HE specifically, merely pointing out the difference between ds in a classroom with 60 kids and two teachers and the possibility of HE; One adult with two kids

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:21

Yurt,you must do what you see fit, but as a salt working with people with special needs (including kids with AS) I would feel similarly concerned.

I would only give you my opinion if you asked for it however.

Julienoshoes · 05/03/2007 22:24

I love the aanswer;
I think she's probably as qualified to talk about HE as she is about breastfeeding.

I had lots of people say the same thing about my children who all have special educational needs-shows what they knew!
Nothing is a difficult as sending very unhappy children to school every day!

There are lots of folks home educating their children with Aspergers, and many who are single parents. They will tell you it is the very best way to educate a child like this-you don't have to make the child fit into the system, where he will be a round peg in a square hole. By home educating you can tailor his education to fit him.

www.he-special.org.uk/index.php is the link for the page for families home educating their children who have SEN. There is a link there for a support group list-invaluable imho.
There is also a link there to the new blog. Abbie, the second parent to blog for a month, is a single parent home educating her son who has similar needs. Have a look at how HE works for her family.

steinermum · 05/03/2007 22:27

She probably meant well, but phrased it really badly. Maybe she was worried about you being isolated and unsupported, or that your son would not have the chance to develop social skills. Find out all there is to know about HE AND about your local schools so that you don't feel so intimidated next time you see her.

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:31

Some interesting replies - thanks

Moondog TBH the main reason that puts me off HE is my lack of welsh. DS is currently attending a category A school at least in part because of your advise to me ages ago.

I havent got CAT set up yet but if I did I would CAT you for your opinion about your concerns!!

OP posts:
Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:32

Ooh Steinermum - your name reflects some of the reasons why im feeling a bit anti school atm. I would CAT you if I could as well!!

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:33

What is a Cat A school?
Why does your lack of Welsh put you off HE??

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:34

Cat A - I mean 100% welsh language education - Maybe I have confused you with someone else.

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:36

Oh ok..they are all like that around here although special schools will use home language.

What,does the Welsh bit worry you at home?
Do you speak English?
If so then obv. you would he through medium of English surely?

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:40

Exactly Moondog -If I HE ds it would be in English!

I am learning welsh and hope to be fluent eventually but am a long way off
If ds stays in his current school he will be fluent fairly effortlessly by the age of 11.

I think I would be a lot keener on HE if I wasnt also really keen for my kids to be fully bilingual - preferably in Welsh

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:42

It's a tough decision.
You must consider the fact that if you remove your child from school,he wil be unlikely to have functinal Welsh,which in many communities (like mine) would mark him out as different over and above the AS.

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:51

Which was my conclusion too tbh

DS is fine in school atm. I was thinking about HE in the event that there came a point when school was no longer a good idea.

Functional Welsh for me and my lo is REALLY important to me

But HV comment was a reference to Aspergers not welsh. I can understand her point.
Its true ds wont be in a class of 60 kids forever. but he is at the moment.

I have a few issues with where dd goes to preschool as well - another story!!!!!!!!!!!

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:54

60 kids!!!!!!
There is only a little over that in my dd's entire school.

I would share your concerns re class size. Fine for some but some kids can get worryingly lost in such a big crowd.

Hope you come to a decision you are happy with.

I am not abroad with my dh because educating through the medium of Welsh is of enormous importance to us. I was educated abroad myself (in English) and still speak Welsh but missed out in many ways.

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 22:57

"worringly lost in such a big crowd" sums it up entirely

There were 40 when he started in sept, 50 at christmas, 60 at Easter!!!!!!! with 2 teachers. OMG

Tis true he will be in a class of less than 30 in sept

OP posts:
moondog · 05/03/2007 22:58

It's still a hell of a lot of kids eh??

Original poster
Yurtgirl · 05/03/2007 23:01

exactly! hence some interest in HE - I am now doing more activity type stuff at home to compensate, to provide more one on one time ifswim.

Thanks for the chat Moondog - I am still interested in your concerns you mentioned before but must go to bed so will interagate you another time

OP posts:
steinermum · 06/03/2007 22:08

I feel for you, but Steiner schools are not a bed of roses either, especially for the parents!!

TheodoresMummy · 06/03/2007 23:55

I have to ask you Steinermum, what do you mean ?

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