learning to read without being taught?

[mumof4darlings]

Hi
I would love to hear any positive stories about how your child learnt to read without being taught. I have been dipping into some free online reading schemes, but i hear so much about people just reading to their child and they suddenly begin to read themselves? how?

I don't honestly know how. Truly, for us it just seems to happen on a gradual continuum from recognising signs saying "Bus Stop".

Making no big deal out of it seems key to me.

Giving access to all sorts of written media (books, games, computer games, internet, DVDs with closed captions, shopping lists, scribing for and reading to child whenever requested etc etc)

Using written media yourself a lot

obviously free access to starfall.com and pbskids and cbeebies.com because there are loads and loads of literacy developing games on those kinds of places

and accepting that the same child will access different amounts of information from one resource at different times. I've seen a child who knows perfectly well how a certain computer game works, having played it since age 3, carefully work their way several years later through all of the Help screens, reading all of the instructions, and tips for how to get through the levels that they've been getting through since goodness knows when.

The question "how?" - I don't think we know, any more than we know how children learn to walk or talk. But every child will learn in a slightly different way, and interfering with their learning process should not be undertaken lightly (I mean, you really want to be sure that there is some physiological problem preventing a child from walking before you start giving them walking lessons aged 11 months, yk? Because walking lessons would be silly at best, and deeply counterproductive at worst, for most children)

What Ommmward said.

My DC are now 16 and 18 and both seemed to learn by osmosis. I was determinedly not getting concerned when DS (DC2) was not reading at 8 and then he reassured me when I overheard him telling his sister that you miss the jokes in Asterix if you skip the long names... At 9 he asked his sister for Harry Potter 1 and read it in a week. AFAIK, it was the first book he read for himself.

DD started much earlier, pointing out her initial and various words from 2, so I was not so bothered about her although she hit a plateau at 5 which seemed to last for ever.

I read loads to them (way above what they could read themselves - the whole Narnia Chronicles when they were 3 and 5), we did functional reading (e.g. recipes, which a child had to read out as my hands were covered in flour, etc.) and anything they wanted from the library. They also listened to vast quantities of audio books. We used no reading scheme but we did have some BBC pre-school mags. And you have to not mind listening to the same jokes being read for the millionth time... (DS is still doing that, but it is QI books and books of stupid answers on exam papers - amazingly educational. :))

I also don't believe we (even the experts) know how to teach reading - we know a number of things that can help, but know "formula". If you look at schools, a lot of the helpful things can hinder - the key seems to be if the child is ready.

I don't know either. She kept it very secret from us. She seemed to learn quite a few words off by heart initially, over a year or so, and also was writing things she was copying etc; and then seemed very unconfident that she was actually reading so we suggested a reading age test for her, which came out as older than she was (wouldn't work for an average age reader - mine was ridiculously young for an autonomous learner!). That gave her a huge boost of confidence and she suddenly wanted to read to us, but not reading scheme books - she read those 'read by yourself' ladybird fairy tales that have four levels. She whizzed through the levels over about 6 weeks and then suddenly stopped reading to us again. And then we realised she was a very fluent reader. Now, aged 7.5, she spends hours upstairs reading chapter books from the library

I think she's exceptionally young to do it like that, and I can't see DD2 doing it anything like as young, but the beautiful thing for me was that she did it herself.

IME of other HE'd children, when they want help they ask for it. YOu don't need to sit down and say 'now we're doin greading practice' unless they ask you to do that for them.

other than that just lots and lots of reading together, playing on computer games (DD1 learned to read words like 'games' and 'play' and 'loading' ), playing any games that require a bit of reading - even if you're the one doing it. Lots of writing too - writing lists together, birthday cards, menus for pretend cafes, names, notes to eachother. And lots of playing with letters - those big foam jigsaw mat things are fun; and rhyming games.

There's a great book called 'Read With Me- An Apprenticeship Approach to Reading' by Liz Waterland that I recommend to loads o parents. It's out of print but you can pick it up really cheaply on Amazon usually.

Other good books I've found are the 'games for reading' and 'games for writing' by Peggy Kaye.

I agree with SDeuchars too - if a child's ready to learn to walk, they'll do it. If a child's ready to learn to potty train, they'll do it. They may need a little assistance but we trust them to ask for it and go with them. Then suddenly we decide that they dont' know their own needs and abilities and readiness anymore and we have to impose onto them our own schedules and teaching and I think that can be really detrimental.

I think letting achild learn to read autonomously can be quite scary until you've seen one do it, particularly when they learn really 'late' compared to their schooled peers, but I think you just hav eto trust taht they're learning at the right age for them.

My DS learned to read by himself, he started aged two.

He would read all of the packets in the cupboard the signs in the supermarket.

He read whole words in the beginning, I remember laughing when he said Mummy I have written hoover and he had written electrolux.

When he was four he started using phonics and asking about origins of words and tenses.

I never thought about teaching him, but if he had reached school age I think I would have taught him.

I suppose if a child is left to their own devices they will learn to read eventually, however as I learned to read when I was 10, my DM cannot read, I know it is a great disadvantage to your early education.

Yea.. All said is correct. My DS learned to read all by himself at 2 years and 4 months but learned the numbers much earlier.! I have no clue how he decoded the words. I am not educationalist and neither ever a teacher.

It must have been because we read and read and read to DS from an early age. He enjoyed it. he chose the books. We took him to libraries, bookstores, bought books sat on the floor, amongst the soft toys and read. We did not use any method ever. Only just reading. We Just read to him the children's books he chose. Suddenly one morning when he was 2 and 4 months he took one of Beatrix Potters stories sat on the floor and started reading aloud to us!!!

Lynli: however as I learned to read when I was 10 [and] my DM cannot read, I know it is a great disadvantage to your early education.

It is only a disadvantage if you are in an environment where the activities are largely based on reading and writing. Home-educated children are not at a disadvantage if they have adults around who are willing and able to read for them. Anecdotal evidence from the home ed community says that, by the time they are adults, a child who learns to read independently at 10 (or even later) cannot be distinguished from one that learned at two. I'd suggest that home education is a particular advantage to late readers because the child does not learn over several years that he or she is failing (and they do learn that - either by comparison with others or because of explicit comments and interventions).

I enjoyed this article on the subject: www.psychologytoday.com/blog/freedom-learn/201002/children-teach-themselves-read

"I suppose if a child is left to their own devices they will learn to read eventually, however as I learned to read when I was 10, my DM cannot read, I know it is a great disadvantage to your early education." Were you at school, Lynli? It is a disadvantage to be unable to read at school, since that is one of the main ways information is presented to children at school. Besides, the use of reading as a yardstick for educational progress at school means a schoolchild who can't read is branded a failure, which is bound to be hard on the self-esteem. I'm sure it's also awkward to be unable to read as an adult in our society. But home educators often say that the inability to read is no more than a slight inconvenience to children who are learning outside of school. That is echoed by the author of the above article.

The pieces of the reading puzzle fell into place for my daughter around her ninth birthday, but I don't feel that an inability to read was a hindrance to her early education. In some ways I think that the fact she hasn't had direct access to the written word was a benefit to her, as her eyes remained open to the world around her and her memory was well-developed. (The same can't be said of me: I was an early reader and my nose is always in a book. Direct observation is not my strong point, and I don't bother remembering things because I rely on looking them up!) Even by school standards, when she went to school the following year she wasn't "behind." The only exceptions were her spelling, which has since reached average standard, and the speed of her handwriting, which I'm confident will improve if ever she does much writing, and anyway she can type well enough. In all other areas she had no difficulty at all. In fact, she came top of the school in a test of general knowledge.

It really depends on your child, most will learn to read whatever system you use or they will simply pick it up.
However if you have a dyslexic child or a child with problems you will need phonics and a systematic approach. I have one child who just appeared to read and one that I had to make cards and games for and I even wrote my own books for him.It isn't fair to leave that sort of child to flounder.
Take your lead from the child that you have.

There is a thread at the moment about whether someone should teach their 3 yr old to read and it is a nonsense! They will read if they are ready and the parent can't stop them, but if they are not ready they won't and damage may be done. Go to the library and enjoy books together and they will probably pick it up.

wow, thankyou so much for all your positive experiences. Its lovely to read them all.

Although we have home ed my eldest from 11 he could already read as he had been through the system, so with my youngest i have been fiddling with various approaches, sight words work well for him, but we have been rather slack over the last month and havent picked them up at all.

I guess I would just like the confidence to let that schooling head go away, and stop worrying what everyone elses child can do at the same age! I can let it go with writing and maths and i can see he is already doing those when he feels like it, like writting signs etc for games he is playing! Reading is one of those hurdles that i worry about more, as we all need to read!

I will look for the book you recommend! Thankyou

My DD2 knows heaps more than she would be expected to know were she in school, and she can't read. Like others have said, it is a huge disadvantage if you can't read if you go to school, but not in the slightest if you are home educated. If anything, it makes you and your parents more creative in terms of learning experiences. I've found myself feeling far too lax about my DD1 as she reads so much, and have to remind myself to still create opportunities for her to learn in other ways.

My son went to school and they killed his love of reading by putting so much pressure on him that, by the time I'd taken him out of school (at 6 yrs old) he cried every time I tried to get him to read. After reading 'Teach Your Own' by John Holt, I decided to back off completely. He taught himself to read (at 8 yrs old) by playing a pc game called World of Warcraft. His desire to play it, read all the quests and communicate with other players was so great that he 'just did it'....(his words).
If you're child is interested enough in something they will learn it easily. Oh, also The Beano Comic helped

I have been following the I'm unschooled. Yes I can write Facebook page and reading the blog of the same name

NB generally 'Unschooling' in America = 'Autonomous Home Education' in the UK

I was reading the blog and found this post on

How I Learned to Read and Write which was linked in this article in Pschology Today

Children teach Themselves to Read
and then remembered this thread!

Hope it is useful.

julienoshoes - these links are great. Thanks so much

According to my mother, I was reading and adding columns of numbers at age 3, without ever having been taught. I have some memories of this - I especially remember being devastated when my grandfather (showing off to his friends) handed me a Norwegian newspaper, and suddenly I had lost my ability to read! (I am American)

I have always been curious about this, and nobody in my family could ever explain how I learned to read without being taught. I was a very advanced student in elementary (grade 2 at age 5) and high school (playing football with older kids was rough!), pretty good in college, had a successful career, but am not a genius.

If anybody has any explanation for how this can happen, please let me know!

I have no idea how it works and watching both my children do it at the moment! I'm teaching my ds (4) phonics at the moment but he will randomly read something more complex like a shop sign, or bus timetable.
My 2 year old is learning by osmosis. I'm not actively teaching her but she will also randomly read labels.

Can I just ask greencaterpillar - how did you know that your ds was reading, and hadnt just memorised the story?

And to the others - did your dc start by reading things they had heard before, or random words here and there?

I think there is wide variety in what different parents percieve as reading.

P-i-g - a child spelling out these sounds is not reading, they are decoding sounds and matching them to letter shapes (phonetic awareness).

Sounds and phonics can obviously be worked out by anyone who regularly hers the sounds (normal, talkative, family life) and who has someone else to point out the shape of the letters.
A child may only need each letter pointed out once or twice to remember them, if they are particulary interested.
Therefore no magic, no children just teaching themselves, but parents who have chatted a lot and very occasionally pointed out letters, perhaps not even recognising they are doing so, by automatic acts like running a finger along the text of a book that is being read out loud.

Then comes sight reading - those non-phonetic words, these can be gleamed by reason (guessed from the pre and post text) and children are amazingly adept at doing this, where they have been chatted to a lot.
It is easy to see even very young (two year olds) do this, read to them a book they have not had before and skip occasional sight words, children will fill in the gaps as you go along - sometimes giving the same as the written answer, sometimes giving an alternative word with the same contextual meaning, but of course only where they have been chatted to a lot.

If you want to be sure your child will learn to read, chat chat chat.

both ds1 and dd2 taught themselves to read - no idea how, but suspect through osmosis as dd1 was a bit older and so we had lots of all sorts of reading material about. we didn't actually know dd2 could read until mil babysat one night and when we got home she was going on about how clever she was. we just rolled our eyes a bit and thought she had been repeating the stories verbatim. but as an experiment we gave her 'the lion the witch and the wardrobe' the next day and she read it out loud quite happily. and about two days after that i was doing some work on virginia woolf and had some books out on the desk, and she started reading them aloud over my shoulder. so we were a bit more careful with what we left lying around then!

we had to have her assessed at 5, to prove she didn't have any learning disabilities - long story, she has cerebral palsy, and everyone knows that if you drool and walk like a drunk you must also have a learning disability, right?

My son started to read fluently when he was 8. There was no discernible progress before this time, you would have said that he wasn't reading at all. I don't recall that he ever picked out individual letters within words or broke up words into their component parts at all, despite enjoying alphabet books and being able to name individual letters if he encountered them on their own.

He was writing from the age of 4, but this largely consisted of large capital letters with no vowels, often right to left. He couldn't decode his own writing afterwards, though it did possess its own internal logic and I was able to read it out loud myself.

We listened to hundreds of audiobooks and I read stories and non-fiction texts out loud to him.

I suppose it must have been around the same age - 8 - when he started to use a typewriter (both manual and electric sourced from jumble sales) then a word processor. He found typing hugely easier than handwriting.

I guess the point I am making is that progress is not linear. There isn't one thing which has to go before another. Some children don't follow the rules for how it is meant to work.

He's 18 now. This is his website, so you can see he made it with the reading and writing eventually! tpn.lowtech.org/writing/

My DS used to have (still has) an amazing auditory memory (he learned to talk late, and I remember a phase in which he could talk in 3/4-word phrases, or in paragraphs recited from his favourite stories) and I think this is what enabled him to teach himself to read very early: he remembered exactly what the squiggles meant and cracked the code by looking at them lots while remembering. Starfall probably helped, but it was just one of many things I sometimes gave him when I needed to keep him occupied for a while. I know he was reading at least a bit before he could talk, but I was too sqeamish to do the experiments that would have shown how much. As I had considered quite carefully whether to teach him to read, and had decided not to, it was an early lesson in how little control one has as a parent! I still think not teaching children to read before they go to school is generally the right decision, but I wouldn't recommend refusing to support self-teaching, either. I gave in and started buying decodable books, to help with his frustration at not being able to read everything in his story books, at the point when it was clear he'd taught himself enough that he was going to be fluent by school unless I locked him in a cupboard till then. I still didn't teach him, but I did listen to him read when he chose to do so and helped with words when he wanted help. That was all it took to get him to complete fluency. He deduced phonics.

sorry, didn't spot that this is in HomeEd, so replace "before school" etc. with "before the age of 4" or some such!

RosemaryandThyme: Therefore no magic, no children just teaching themselves, but parents who have chatted a lot and very occasionally pointed out letters, perhaps not even recognising they are doing so, by automatic acts like running a finger along the text of a book that is being read out loud.

I agree with you to a certain extent - I certainly agree that children kept in a cupboard (or in front of a TV without interaction) will not "just learn". However, when EHEers say "they did themselves", what we are comparing with is the structured models of phonics and reading schemes.

I cheerfully admit that my DD had me alongside her from birth reading to her, doing jigsaws, chatting about everything - I am sure all that enormously aided her starting to read. DS had the same environment and did not respond in the same way and did what I could recognise as reading much later. I am sure that he took in just as much from the environment - he simply processed it differently and it came together differently in his brain.

So, I say that I:

• facilitated my children learning to read.
• modelled reading to my children.
• demonstrated that reading has purpose.

I did not teach them to read. They learned from the environment.

To give an analogy, I speak no Greek although I speak three other European languages (apart from English). If I went to Greece and lived with people there in a Greek-speaking community for a year, I would expect to pick up the language even if I had no formal teacher. I would be highly motivated. Like a small child, I would treat every encounter as a learning opportunity. I would ask everyone to correct my speech and would gradually understand more and be able to produce more. I might buy some books to fill in gaps rather faster than would be possible in normal conversation. However, I would have learned myself.

This is not something that is really possible to do in isolation - we have been using books and computer programs to learn Russian for some years. They have helped us to get the basics but we now go to a tutor because we need to have real live talk with a native speaker before we will get to the point where we can really say we speak the language.

I hope you get the point - people do not learn language in any meaningful sense by themselves, whether it is their native language in written form or a foreign language. Everyone learns to read by themselves - it is the form that assistance takes (and whether it needs to take a specific form) that is the topic of discussions such as these.