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Original poster

Uh oh .. what should I do?

28 replies

ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:25

Hi all,

Wasn't sure where to post this, so if it's wrong, then please report.

DS starts primary school in September.

We're going on holiday in for two weeks in September and 1 week in November because I know under 5 we don't get the fine.

I can't move them or change them due to the costs involved with them.

Now it seems likely he'll be going to a special school, does this change anything, or do I just let them know that I would like a mainstream school?

I'm just a bit worried about it now..

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 05/01/2025 21:27

Are you saying that your son will be assigned a SEN school but don't want one?
Whats the significance of your booked holidays?

Cloverforever · 05/01/2025 21:28

Whydid you book 3 weeks holiday just as your child starts school? That's going to be massively disruptive for them.

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:29

Hoppinggreen · 05/01/2025 21:27

Are you saying that your son will be assigned a SEN school but don't want one?
Whats the significance of your booked holidays?

Sorry, I've worded that completely wrong.

What I meant was do I let the SEN school know about the holidays like the I would a mainstream school or is there another process with it being two in term time.

OP posts:
HyggeTygge · 05/01/2025 21:30

Now it seems likely he'll be going to a special school, does this change anything, or do I just let them know that I would like a mainstream school?

Regardless of any trips away, which school would be best for him?

LaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaLaa · 05/01/2025 21:30

HyggeTygge · 05/01/2025 21:30

Now it seems likely he'll be going to a special school, does this change anything, or do I just let them know that I would like a mainstream school?

Regardless of any trips away, which school would be best for him?

He’s going to the SEN school, OP has just clarified.

HyggeTygge · 05/01/2025 21:31

Oh sorry - you meant 'do I just let them know, in the same way that I would with a mainstream school' - thanks for clarification!
I would speak to the school and work out what is best for him and his needs.

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:31

Cloverforever · 05/01/2025 21:28

Whydid you book 3 weeks holiday just as your child starts school? That's going to be massively disruptive for them.

I didn't think reception was much different from nursery, and he turns 5 in January, so we won't be able to go again in term time again and it's just the way our holidays worked out.

OP posts:
Potentialmadcatlady · 05/01/2025 21:32

Taking a child out that much at start of school is asking for trouble. Double trouble if they are SEN.

Thelondonone · 05/01/2025 21:32

He won’t be of compulsory school age so you won’t be fined. Yes, you should tell them. However, any parent that takes their kid out of school on their first term when they are settling in should take a long hard look at their parenting. If their child needs a special school then I seriously think you need to cancel.

PickledPurplePickle · 05/01/2025 21:33

Can’t he start school in the January instead? It’s going to be really disruptive for him

ACynicalDad · 05/01/2025 21:33

You shouldn’t really do it, but it won’t change any fine. There shouldn’t be one st either, bur it may make it harder for your child to settle.

arethereanyleftatall · 05/01/2025 21:34

Op. He may not 'have' to go to school. But the first few weeks are super important and when friendships start forming. You are doing him a gross miservice to make him start school after friendships are formed. He will be on catch up from the get go.

Nevertoocoldforicecream · 05/01/2025 21:35

arethereanyleftatall · 05/01/2025 21:34

Op. He may not 'have' to go to school. But the first few weeks are super important and when friendships start forming. You are doing him a gross miservice to make him start school after friendships are formed. He will be on catch up from the get go.

Yes exactly this, I'd think again about rescheduling the September one.

Hoppinggreen · 05/01/2025 21:37

ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:31

I didn't think reception was much different from nursery, and he turns 5 in January, so we won't be able to go again in term time again and it's just the way our holidays worked out.

Show quote history

Reception IS very different from nursery and with a SEN child just starting school missing 3 weeks so soon may well cause issues for them.
I am not completely opposed to missing a bit of school for holidays, I did it a few times but was careful to avoid ceratin times and September in R would certainly be one of those times.
Its not about avoiding fines its about whats best for your son

Whitewallwhiteceiling · 05/01/2025 21:38

I have 2 kids in mainstream and one at a SEN school, it works exactly the same way in terms of taking term time holidays. Just fill out the holiday request form if they have one, they’ll probably decline it as per the current rules and the holidays will be marked as unauthorised as you already know, but you won’t get the fine due to being under compulsory school age - this is the same at SEN schools just like mainstream. Enjoy your hols!

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:39

Honestly, it's unlikely he's going to form any friendships in the first year but the holiday is at the end of the month, so he'll have some settling in time.

I'll consider what my options are as I was under the impression reception wasn't too different to nursery so he wouldn't be any more disrupted than he would now but I'll see what I can do and what's best for him.

We need to travel at quieter times hence the dates but like mentioned I'll see what our options are.

Thanks everyone.

OP posts:
Boffle · 05/01/2025 21:39

Those first weeks at school are crucial for the child to settle.
I have no problem with term time holidays later in primary school but not in the first term and especially not just to save a few ££

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:41

Boffle · 05/01/2025 21:39

Those first weeks at school are crucial for the child to settle.
I have no problem with term time holidays later in primary school but not in the first term and especially not just to save a few ££

As mentioned, it's not really to save ££ - it's about finding quieter times to travel.

I'm not bothered about the fines, but obviously, they get harsher each time they go on holiday, and I don't fancy getting prosecuted.

And summer holidays are out of the question but as mentioned I'll look at our options.

OP posts:
HyggeTygge · 05/01/2025 21:54

It's a similar curriculum as preschool - EYFS - but they are learning the building blocks of reading phonics, doing the sounds in a set order (don't know if this applies to special schools but assuming from mainstream). Plus importantly getting into the rhythm and routine of the school, learning where things are etc.

I think the odd week wouldn't be disastrous but that's quite a lot of time out - you know your child and how much support he needs at this key time.

MimiSunshine · 05/01/2025 21:59

I'll consider what my options are as I was under the impression reception wasn't too different to nursery so he wouldn't be any more disrupted than he would now but I'll see what I can do and what's best for him.

its not that the learning is hugely different to a good preschool setting in a nursery. It’s that it’s a totally different environment with lots of new rules.

yes its all learn through play etc but there will be processes and requirements they have to learn in the school. New teachers and an abundance of other things.
Most kids these days have done an 8-5 day (at least, at nursery) but still go home tired after a 9-3 school day.
The mental tiredness comes from them absorbing so much new information.

id look to cancel the September holiday st least. Missing 2 weeks when he’s only just started that month is madness

Ponderingwindow · 05/01/2025 22:05

I took my own dd out for a week of reception in October. I have no regrets. I would not have taken her out for 2 weeks right at the beginning though. That is right when they are settling in and learning how the classroom works. It’s a critical time and it’s the one part of the entire school experience I would not miss unless the child was ill and it was completely unavoidable.

Raindropskeepfallinonmyhead · 05/01/2025 22:08

Potentialmadcatlady · 05/01/2025 21:32

Taking a child out that much at start of school is asking for trouble. Double trouble if they are SEN.

100% this - very unsettling for a 4 year old

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 22:13

Interesting, that's my bad for assuming it'll be like the nursery.

Thanks, everyone. I'll see what my options are.

OP posts:
MILLYmo0se · 05/01/2025 22:13

ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 21:31

I didn't think reception was much different from nursery, and he turns 5 in January, so we won't be able to go again in term time again and it's just the way our holidays worked out.

Show quote history

It's not from an academic point of view, it's from and emotional and security point of view that it could be an issue. He ll be arriving back as every other child has done a solid 3-4 settling into the routine and building friendships. It could leave him at a disadvantage from that point of view, he ll essentially be back at week 1 stage when every other child has moved out of that stage, it's really not ideal, particularly to then miss another full week 6 weeks later tbh

Original poster
ToastyCat · 05/01/2025 22:27

I've cancelled the November holiday but couldn't cancel the September on as it'd just cost too much (£6k) so I've requested for it to be moved to November - it'll still be two weeks but at least it's not right as he starts so hopefully it'll work out better for him.

Thanks again, everyone.

OP posts:
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